Liar
by Kasamyra
Summary: What if before Barney met Ted and the others, he had met one other person? And what if he had met this person as she was about to jump off the observations deck of the Empire State Building? And what if he had managed to get her not to jump? What if she became a part of the group, even before Robin did?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

_Night time in New York is beautiful. Well, sometimes it is. You can't really see the stars, the light pollution from the city is too strong. But sometimes the lights are beautiful. If you are somewhere high up. Well, pretty much everything is beautiful when it's viewed from a distance. It just depends on your mood, really. And that's my problem, I guess. I can't view anything from a distance. At least, not anything that matters. I know my life hasn't been as hard as it could have been, I got lucky there, I guess. I suppose I've been lucky in a lot of things. But I've never earned that luck. I've never earned any of it._

_As long as I can remember, I've just been able to know things. It's not guessing, because I've never been wrong. And it's not just anything, it's lies. I always know when someone is telling a lie. Even if it's a half truth, I can just tell. And I hate it. My life has been good. But I'm tired of the lies. Every single person lies to me. Every one. And I can't stand it. I've spent all of my life waiting for the one person who won't lie to me, and they never showed. I know it's still early in my life to be giving up, but I can't do it anymore. I can't keep waiting, and I can't keep being alone. I am just so... tired. Of everything. And I know they all say it gets better, but it really doesn't. I'm alone, in the biggest city in America. I've always been alone, and that will never change, so I'm done. And I'm not sorry at all._

_-Cas_

_'Well, as suicide notes go, that is an unusual one for sure,'_ she thought as she waved the paper back and forth to dry the ink. She was sure the cops would find it weird anyway. She didn't have any family left, and she had never been good at keeping friends. She didn't have a job anymore, so really, the only reason she even bothered leaving a note was so that the cops wouldn't think she was murdered or anything.

Cas had never been afraid to die, she was actually quite curious about it, but she'd never had a reason to go before. Now, she didn't have a reason to stay. And she refused to go through life drifting. She had tried it before and hated it. She needed an anchor. Something to keep her here. And she didn't have one anymore. She didn't think she ever would have one again. She couldn't get attached to people, they all lie, and she hated knowing about it. But she couldn't turn it off, she didn't know how. She wished she did. She wished she could just not care about it, at the very least. But it was the only thing she couldn't make herself not care about. She didn't care about anything else, she had learned not to, but that one thing always stuck around. No matter how much she tried not to care about people lying to her, it always hurt when it happened, even though she was expecting it. And she was tired of it hurting. Everything hurt. And she was exhausted. She hadn't slept in days, she couldn't. Every time she closed her eyes she would start thinking about all the biggest lies she had been told, the ones that had changed things. There was always a turning point, in everything, and it always revolved around a lie. And she was done with it.

She folded the note and set it on top of the empty desk in her living room. Well, really, the apartment only had one room, and a bathroom. So her living room was also her bedroom. And kitchen. But she had sectioned it off, using a folding screen divider to cut off her bed from the rest of the room, and two waist high book shelves to divide the kitchen part and the living room part. She liked the little apartment, though she could definitely afford a bigger place. When her parents had died they had left her everything they had. She'd had enough to put herself through college and get her own place and still have a lot left over to live off of. And she had always had a job, she couldn't just sit around and do nothing, so the money had built up over the years. She couldn't bring herself to sell her old childhood home, but she didn't want to live in the suburbs, so the house remained unused. She wondered what would happen to it after she was dead, since she didn't have a will. Or any living relatives.

She glanced around the apartment one last time, making sure everything was how she wanted it to be found. Everything was meticulously cleaned and straightened, all the clothes were folded or hung neatly, the bed was made, the cupboards organized, the floors scrubbed. It looked as it normally did. Like no one really lived there. She closed the door and locked it with the single key she carried, then tucked it into her pocket and straightened her shoulders. It was a little chilly outside, which she didn't realize till she got to the street. She was still wearing the clothes she had worn though the warm day, a thin sleeveless blouse and shorts. Now she wished she had grabbed a sweater, but it was too late for that. She kept walking. It was only four blocks from her apartment to the subway, then two blocks from the subway to the base of the Empire State Building. She knew it was cliche, but she had always loved the building, and the sight from the top of it. Yes, the tours to the top stopped around nine, and it was nearly midnight now, but the building was always open in the lobby, and she was planning on taking the stairs, which she had only done once before, when the elevator had broken down and she had really needed somewhere to think. She had almost jumped that time too, but she hadn't. She wasn't sure why, exactly. It just hadn't felt like the right time. This time did.

Fifteen minutes later, she was getting off the train and walking the two blocks to the Empire State Building. She paused at the bottom of the building and looked up. She couldn't see the top from the very bottom, it was too dark, so she shrugged and walked around the last corner to the front doors, and stopped dead. There were way more lights on than normal, and through the windows, she could see the crowded lobby, full of people dressed in fancy clothes and holding cups of wine. She groaned in frustration. Of course she would have to pick a day when an event was happening. She glanced back the way she had come, then back at the building, making up her mind. If there was a party, there would be staff. All she had to do was find where they came and went, and sneak in that way. Once she was on the stairs no one would see her, most people used the elevator. Especially since the stairs were made as an emergency exit and weren't supposed to be used by anyone unless there was a fire.

Cas watched the front of the building for a few moments. There was a valet, but he was bringing cars up, not taking them away, so the event must be coming to an end. She walked past them, acting like she was just walking past the building, and they ignored her. When she reached the other side of the doors, she stopped in the shadows and leaned against the building, thinking. She was just debating if she could sneak in the front doors when a darker side door opened beside her. She ignored the person coming out of it, but made sure to catch the door before it closed all the way, and waited until the man had walked a few steps away before she slid into the building. She glanced around for only a few moments before realizing where she was and grinning. That door had opened directly into the stairwell. That had been lucky. She started up the stairs, hoping that no one on the first floor was looking up at the landing, where there was a wide window to let light into the stairwell. She didn't pause before the window, just walked past it like she belonged. She had learned a long time ago that if you acted like you were supposed to be there, no one would notice you. She still let out a sigh of relief when she reached the third floor. From there on up there were no windows into the stairwell. Her legs began to burn then too, but she ignored it. There were 102 floors in the building, but the observation deck she wanted to go to was on the 86th floor. Last time it had taken her 45 minutes to get there. This time, she was walking slowly, giving herself time to think. Her legs still burned, and her lungs began to burn too, after the fifteenth floor. She wasn't in bad shape, she went running every day, and she didn't eat a lot of junk food, but these stairs were horribly steep. Finally, at nearly one in the morning, she was on the right floor. She stopped before the door to the observation deck and let out a sigh. She pushed one door open, hoping it wasn't locked. It swung open easily and she smiled. Another lucky chance, she hadn't though about the deck being locked until she'd arrived. She walked out onto the platform and shivered. The wind up here was much stronger, and she was covered with sweat from the climb up which chilled her even more. She closed the door quietly behind her and walked to the edge of the deck to lean on the barrier for a moment, catching her breath at last as she stared out over the lights of the city.

She wasn't sure how long she stood there. She wasn't thinking about anything in particular, she was just appreciating the view one last time. Finally, she looked around and found a big enough opening in the safety wall they had built to prevent people from jumping, or falling, off the building, and she wriggled through it carefully, clinging onto the thin strips of metal to push herself through. She was lucky she was tiny. She had never topped 5'2" and she had always had narrow hips and no curves to speak of. If she had been any bigger, she wouldn't have been able to fit through the wall. It was still a little difficult, the larger sections were above the reach of any children, so it took her a few minutes to get through.

She guessed it to be about two in the morning now, the city was quieter at this time than any other part of the day, though it was still teeming with life. She stood on the edge of the platform, gripping the metal strips of the fence behind her tightly, as she stared out over the city. It was exhilarating, being this high up, in the open. It was so much more exciting on this side of the fence. She felt like she could fly. She let out a half sob, half laugh at the thought, and realized she was crying. Why was she crying? She wasn't sad at all. Just excited. She had never belonged in this world, maybe now she would find somewhere she fit in.

She drew a deep breath and closed her eyes, holding the air in her lungs for a few moments. Finally, she let it out and frowned, opening her eyes. Why hadn't she jumped? She was ready. Her grip loosened on the fence, and she leaned forward slightly, taking in another breath.

"Please don't jump," a voice behind her said softly, and she nearly fell in surprise. She didn't look behind her though, just opened her eyes again.

"Why not?" She asked the man behind her, taking another deep breath to make her voice calm.

"Because you don't want to," he said, his voice calm, as though they were talking about the weather over a cup of coffee. But he wasn't lying, at least, he didn't think he was. She could tell.

"And how could you possibly know that?" She asked patiently.

"Because you've been up here for two hours and you still haven't done it. If you wanted to, you would have already," he said, his voice closer to her now. She frowned. Two hours? She adjusted her grip and looked down again. He was right, she had been putting it off a bit. But that didn't mean she didn't want to jump.

"You are probably right," she said softly. If she had been ready to jump, she would have already, like he said. It didn't feel like the right time to her, though she didn't really know why. As soon as she had realized that, her feet moved forward a little bit, the toes of her shoes now over the edge of the platform, and her grip loosened a little more.

"So why don't you come back to this side of the fence?" He asked, his voice directly behind her. She could hear the shake in it now. He was scared. For her? He didn't know her. At least, she didn't recognize the voice.

"Why are you up here?" She asked, ignoring his suggestion. She frowned though, she didn't want anyone to be here when she jumped. It would probably hurt them, emotionally. She knew it must be hard to watch someone die, and she didn't want that to happen to this person, whoever he was, even though she didn't know him.

"I saw you walking up the stairs earlier. You didn't look like someone from the party so I followed you. No one takes the stairs," he said, and she almost smiled. She could imagine him shaking his head, as though saying, "you're crazy" with a little smile on his face, though she didn't know what he looked like.

"Why would you follow me? Why not just tell security?" She asked. She knew there was a security detail for the building, but she also knew they didn't really do their jobs right, since on her previous visits she had managed to explore a lot of the building that was probably off limits to tourists, and she had never been kicked out.

"You looked sad," he said, and she could hear the shrug in his voice, though it still shook a little.

"I'm not sad. What's your name?" She asked, letting the breeze blow her hair into her face.

"Barney," he said. "What's yours?"

"Cas," she said, smiling. "Nice to meet you."

"Can you please come back in here?" He asked, slightly impatiently. She grinned.

"I could," she said, nodding. He waited a few moments to see if she would move. When she didn't he let out a huff of breath. She smiled again, then frowned as she heard him moving again. Was he leaving? She hadn't meant to make him angry. Suddenly the nearly solid wall of metal strips that formed the fence moved a little, and she couldn't help but glance back for a second. He was climbing through the same hole she had used, feet first to brace himself so he could get the rest of him though. He was a little quicker to get through then she had been, but his face was completely pale, and his grip on the metal strips was much tighter than hers was. The knuckles on his hand nearest to her were white.

"What are you doing?" she asked, her words coming out in a hiss. She saw him glance down and swallow before he looked over at her. His hair was as light as hers, and he had a nice face, she supposed, though she couldn't tell what color his eyes were in the lack of light.

"If you jump I'll jump," he said, sounding a little winded, though she guessed that was just nerves.

"Why would you do that?" She asked, frowning. He wasn't lying.

"Because I don't want you to jump," he said, not taking his eyes off the ground.

"And why would that keep me from jumping? I don't even know you," she asked, though she was sure now that she wouldn't be jumping today.

"I don't know," he said, his grip tightening on the metal. She sighed.

"Fine, go back inside, I won't jump," she said, looking down again. She wasn't scared, but he obviously was, and she really didn't like causing people to be stressed. He glanced at her, his mouth forming a frown, though he raised an eyebrow in question. "I promise I won't jump."

"Wow, I really didn't think that would work. Why the change of mind?" He asked, though he was already pulling the upper part of his body back up though the hole.

"There are hundreds of ways to die," she said, sidling along the edge of the platform so she could pull herself back through the hole like he had. "And there's always tomorrow to find one of them." Her voice was light and calm.

He waited until she had found the opening in the fence and pulled the top half of herself through before he spoke again.

"There's always tomorrow to not die too," he muttered, clamping one of his hands around her wrist as she got her feet through the hole and caught her balance. He pulled her all the way across the platform and back into the building in silence. She shrugged at his comment, letting this stranger pull her along. Inside, he took off his suit jacket and handed it to her. She pulled it on with a smile, not realizing just how cold she had been until that moment. He grabbed her wrist again and pulled her down the hall past the stair door.

"Where are we going?" She asked calmly, and he glance back at her.

"Downstairs," he said, his voice a little harsh.

"We should take the stairs. There's that event," she said, but trailed off with a frown.

"It's over. I was at it," he said, coming to a stop at the elevator door and pushing the button. As they waited in silence, she looked him over. He was attractive, about her age, maybe a little older. And he hadn't lied to her yet. Maybe that was why she let him drag her along. The elevator ride down was silent too, as was the walk from the elevator out the front of the building and a little ways down the street. He had released her wrist when they hit the ground floor, but he walked between her and the road, on purpose she suspected, not looking at her. She could have left, he wasn't dragging her along anymore, but she didn't really have anywhere to go. So she just walked beside him in silence. From the corner of her eye she could see that his eyebrows were drawn, and his hands, tucked inside his pockets, were balled into fists. She frowned.

"Are you okay?" She asked at last as they came to another street and dodged a few people on the sidewalk. It must have been around five in the morning, business people were starting to come out onto the streets again in suits and professional clothes, and the sun was just peeking over the horizon.

He stopped suddenly, turning toward her with a frown and two raised eyebrows.

"Am I okay?" He repeated. "Of course I'm okay. Are you okay?" He asked, obviously frustrated. He was half lying about being okay. She could tell.

"I'm fine," she said, shrugging and glancing around them. "You want some coffee?" She said, pointing over her shoulder to the cafe behind her. He stared at her for another minute, frowning, then shrugged.

"Sure, why not," he said, walking with her toward the door.

"That's just what every girl wants to hear," she said sarcastically. She saw the corner of his mouth twitch up in an almost smile.

"So, Cas, what were you doing on top of the Empire State Building?" He asked when they had gotten their coffee. They had both agreed they would rather keep walking then sit in the cafe, so they were back on the streets which now glowed in the rising sun as the city began to wake up.

"Oh, you know, just admiring the view," she said, sipping her coffee. He shook his head, then smiled. "Why were you going to jump?" The smile disappeared.

"I wasn't really going to," he said.

"Liar," she said, though she smiled. He glanced at her, and raised an eyebrow again.

"Well, there's nothing major going on in my life right now. It might be interesting to jump from the top of the Empire State Building," he said in a joking voice, but she could tell he wasn't lying.

"Interesting," she repeated quietly, then shook her head. "So, Barney," she began. "Where are we going?"

"Don't you want to go home?" He asked, moving aside to let someone walk past them.

"Nah, I'm not really tired," she said, shrugging. She had been tired when she left her apartment, but now she was wide awake. Maybe that's what standing on the edge of a thousand foot drop did to a person. Maybe it was just the coffee. "Though if you want to get home, or to work or something, I can go," she said, then frowned slightly. She actually enjoyed the mans presence. Weird.

"Nah," he said. "I don't have any friends and I can call in sick to work whenever I want. Beside's, it's Friday, there's no reason to work on a Friday," he said, grinning.

"You don't have any friends? Why not?" She asked, though she couldn't really talk. She didn't have any either. She could tell that wasn't the main point of the sentence, but he wouldn't have mentioned it if it wasn't bothering him. That much she knew about people.

"I mean, I have a few," he said with a shrug. "Not any close ones though."

"Why not go make some then?" She asked, raising an eyebrow.

"It's not that easy you know," he said, smiling.

"You are very charismatic. You could just walk up to someone and tell them you are their new best friend, and you will probably become their new best friend," she said, grinning now.

"Hm, I wonder if that line would work on a chick," he said in a mockingly curious voice.

"Yeah, try that," she said, just as sarcastically.

"Challenge Accepted!" He said, then adopted a thinking face.

"I was joking," she said, slightly worried.

"Tonight at nine we are going to McGee's pub, you know where that is?" He asked, not really paying attention, though she did nod. "And I will complete this challenge. You have to be there to witness it." She stared at him for a moment, then shook her head, a smile on her lips.

"You are insane," she said, smiling.

"The insanest," he agreed, straight faced. She looked at him for a half a second, then burst into laughter. He laughed too.

"Alright, McGees at nine. Sounds great," she said, shaking her head. Then she frowned for a moment. "Actually, can we make it MacLarens? It's closer to my house, it's on-"

"I know where it is, and fine. MacLarens, nine," he said, nodding. They stood there awkwardly for a moment.

"Um, so, I should go," she began at the same time he said "I don't usually do this but do you want to get breakfast?"

"Oh, that's fine, I'll-" he said, as she said, "That actually sounds really good."

They both laughed and this time, she was the one grabbing his wrist and dragging him down the street to a different cafe that she knew was good.

"Is here okay? They make really good pancakes," she said, grinning.

"Sure," he said, letting her pull him through the door. They sat down and picked up their menu's in silence, each one looking over the choices. As she sat, Cas began to feel how tired she really was, but she didn't want to leave. This was the most conversation she'd had outside of work in years. She held back a yawn as the waitress took Barney's order, then turned to her.

"I'll have a single order of pancakes, and a cup of coffee please," she said, closing her menu and setting it aside. The waitress walked away and they returned to silence again. "So, you said you usually don't do breakfast?" She asked curiously. He just nodded. "Why not?"

"Because when you buy a girl breakfast she gets ideas," he said, shrugging, though his mouth turned up into a smirk. She raised an eyebrow. "Also I make it a rule to be gone before the morning."

"Oh, so you are one of those guys who picks up girls for the night and ditches them? Usually you pick them up by lying right?" She asked, trying to sound disapproving.

"Pretty much," he said, smirking at her.

"I see," she said, and took a sip of the scalding coffee the waitress had brought her. Even though she was still wearing Barney's suit jacket, she was cold. "And breakfast the next morning gives the impression that you are sticking around," she said, nodding. She could see why girls would think that.

"Exactly," he said, sipping his own coffee, then making a face at the heat. She smiled.

"Makes sense," she said, nodding.

"Really? You are the first girl who didn't immediately say that I'm disgusting when I tell them that," he said, frowning in a joking manner. "Thanks so much," he said sarcastically. She smiled.

"Well, if you are lying to hook up with a girl and she falls for it she is either stupid, or had already decided earlier that night that she would be going home with someone. Either way, if you stick around till breakfast they will start to connect meaning to the night before, because only someone who cares about them would stay for the boring parts of life too, not just the sex or exciting things. You probably don't take girls out to dinner either. Giving a girl food is like saying that you want to take care of her, and subconsciously, she will attach meaning to any nourishing action you make," she shook her head and smiled. "I meant to say that if you stay around for breakfast it's no longer a one night stand, its a date."

"Exactly," he said again after a few seconds of silence.

"Sorry, I was a psychology major in college with a minor in creative writing. Sometimes I tend to go on and on about my point," she said, smiling wryly.

"Nah, you worded it perfectly. So that's why I don't do breakfast, usually," he said, nodding.

"Don't worry, I won't get any strange ideas from breakfast," she said, making him smile again.

"Good, because this isn't a date. It's me making sure some crazy chick doesn't jump in front of a car on her way home," he said, sounding sarcastic, but she didn't feel a lie in the words. She smiled.

"Thanks," she said softly, playing with her coffee cup and looking down as she spoke.

"If you are a psychologist…" he began questioningly, but trailed off.

"Why was I going to jump?" She asked, smiling a little again. He nodded. "Hearing about everyone else's problems doesn't make my own okay," she said, shrugging. "Actually, I wasn't jumping because of my own problems, I was jumping because I had no reason not to," she said.

"Oh," he said, then sat back in silence as the waitress brought out their food. They ate without conversation for ten minutes or so. Cas could only eat half of the pancake before she felt full. She hadn't been eating properly the last few weeks, her stomach must have shrunken. "I guess that's why I would have done it too," he said after a few minutes of her pushing pieces of pancake around her plate. She looked up at him, surprised. He wasn't lying. She watched him for a moment, then smiled.

"Well, now you have a reason," she said, smiling. He cocked his head to the side like a puppy and she had to keep herself from grinning.

"What?" He asked, frowning.

"You have a challenge to complete," she reminded him. "And I apparently have to see you complete it, so that's my reason," she added, her eyes crinkling in a smile.

"Yeah, definitely," he said, nodding as he finished his food. She reached for the check when the waitress brought it over, but he beat her to it. She smiled again.

"You have to let me pay for my food, otherwise it's a date," she said, nudging his arm as they got up to pay. He rolled his eyes at her.

"You can count it as a date if you want, but I'm not waiting for her to split the check," he said, his mouth turned up at the corners. She laughed at that.

"Fine. I'll just get you back later then," she said, and laughed again as he rolled his eyes again. They walked back out to the streets in silence, walking nearly three blocks before realizing they weren't going anywhere in particular. He turned to face her then.

"Are you okay to be alone?" He asked, looking in her eyes. Now she noticed that his eyes were a light blue color. She half smiled. They were nearly the same shade as her own.

"I'm not going to go find a bus to jump in front of, if that's what you're asking," she said, resisting the urge to roll her eyes.

"I'm serious," he said, his face letting her know he was.

"I am too," she said, her face now matching his. "I'll be fine. The moment passed, I'll have to wait for the next one, and it'll be a while." He watched her for a moment, then nodded and held out his phone to her. She frowned in confusion for a moment, glancing back up at him.

"Well?" He said after a second.

"What?" She asked, confused.

"Put your phone number in so I can call you if you don't show up at the bar later," he said as though it were obvious. She smiled and took the phone, again resisting the urge to roll her eyes. She put her number in, and changed her name to 'that girl you took out for a breakfast date' and locked the screen before handing it back, grinning.

"Was that just an excuse to get my number?" She asked, smiling playfully.

"Nah. You are too smart to fall for my tricks," he said, grinning. "I'll see you tonight then."

"Sure," she said, smiling again. "It's a date."

"No it's not," he said, frowning.

"I know, I'm kidding," she said, laughing at the look on his face. He rolled his eyes, then turned around and was gone.

Cas made her way to the subway, smiling the whole way home. She unlocked the door to her apartment and stopped just inside the door, looking around at the place again. It looked a lot different from when she had left. It seemed lighter, and more comforting. She toed off the shoes she was wearing and left them by the door, then ginned as she realized she was still wearing Barney's suit jacket over her short sliver blouse. She shrugged out of it, hanging it over the desk chair. She just barely managed to shed her shorts and shirt before falling into the bed, asleep instantly. She slept better than she had in months, finally not being woken by nightmares or being kept up by her thoughts.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Cas woke as the sun was setting, glad for the first time all month that she had quit her job. It took her a few minutes of watching her room darken to realize why she was still in bed as the sun was going down. She hadn't jumped. Instead, she had met someone, who she might classify as a friend, but she wasn't sure yet. Most of her friendships didn't last past a week, at the longest. They usually said she unnerved them. She stretched her arms above her head and found her way out of the twisted blankets to walk towards the bathroom, shedding her remaining clothes as she went. She took a quick shower, emerging into the cool room, shivering at the chilly air. She decided jeans and a long sleeved sweater would be better for tonights outing than shorts, and hunted through her drawers for them quickly, her hair dripping down her back until it met the towel.

Finally, as eight o'clock rolled around, she was dressed, her hair curled back nicely, and she had even worn makeup for the bar visit, though she usually didn't like the stuff much. She grabbed her phone and house key from her nightstand where she had left them the night before, and left the apartment. Summer wasn't quite over yet, but the nights were growing colder and colder. Soon she would have to wear a jacket out of the house. But she would delay that as much as possible. She probably could have brought Barney's suit jacket to return it to him, but she didn't want him to have to carry it around all night. And a little part of her wanted to have an excuse to see him again after today. It was warmer tonight than the previous night, and the air was almost completely still, which Cas was glad about since she had actually taken the time to style her hair that day and wind would have completely ruined it. MacLaren's was only two buildings over from her apartment, so it took her less than a minute to get there. Cas arrived before Barney did, so she found a seat at the end of the bar and ordered a beer, then settled in to wait in a seat that faced the door. Barney arrived when she was halfway through her first beer and she had just started to think he had forgotten, wearing a suit and a grin. He glanced around the bar twice before frowning and looking at his phone. She supposed that she must have looked a little different with her hair down and wearing nicer clothes, but she thought he would recognize her. She pulled her phone out of her pocket and waited for it to ring, since he looked to be calling her. He ordered a drink from the bartender and found a place to lean against the counter, two chairs away from her. She was trying to suppress her laughter as he held his phone to his ear and hers began to ring.

"Hello," She said, answering the phone with a smile. He turned toward her when he heard her speak and raised an eyebrow.

"You look… different," he said, and she nearly blushed as he looked her over.

"Yeah well I thought it was a little cold out for shorts tonight," she said, tucking her phone back into her pocket.

"It was a little cold for shorts last night too," he said, rolling his eyes and coming over to lean against the counter near her. They both took a moment to look around the bar, then Barney grinned. "Target acquired," he said, his eyes falling on a brown haired girl sitting alone at a table in the middle of the bar. Cas rolled her eyes and leaned against the counter to watch from her chair. Barney walked over to the girl and sat down, talking. Cas couldn't hear what he was saying, but within ten minutes he was walking back over to her, waving a napkin and grinning.

"That actually worked?" Cas asked, rolling her eyes as he tore up the napkin with the girls phone number on it.

"Yep. She was waiting for a blind date," he said, still holding his glass of whatever he was drinking.

"That doesn't count," Cas said, frowning as she watched the girl leaving the bar with a last smile towards Barney.

"You didn't make conditions in the challenge, so yes it does," he argued, still smiling. She rolled her eyes and turned back to her drink as he went off to use the restroom. She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't notice how much time had passed until Barney came back, grinning, and towing another person behind him.

"This," Barney said, jerking the two of them to a stop in front of her, "is Ted, my new best friend. I'm teaching him how to live."

"That's nice," she said, rolling her eyes, but she couldn't keep herself from smiling a little.

"Haaaave you met Ted?" Barney asked, then walked away, pushing Ted towards her. She rolled her eyes.

"Yes I have, you just introduced us five seconds ago," she called after him. He shook his head as he retreated to the other side of the bar. Cas and Ted looked at each other for a couple seconds, not really knowing what to say.

"I'm Cas," she said, holding out her hand. He smiled and shook it.

"Ted," he replied. "I'm actually here with friends… did you want to sit with us?" He nodded his head at a booth nearby where two other people sat, talking.

"Sure," she said, shrugging. She glanced back at Barney, but he was already chatting up another girl, so she followed Ted to the booth and sat beside him.

"Guys, this is Cas. Cas, this is Marshall and Lily," Ted said. Cas gave them a little wave as they both said hi.

"So, how do you know Ted?" Lily asked, sipping her beer. Cas glanced at Ted, not really knowing what to say.

"That guy over there introduced us," Ted said, pointing in the general direction of Barney. "He said he is my new best friend and will teach me how to live." Ted rolled his eyes.

"Sorry, that's my fault probably. I told him he is charismatic enough that that line would probably work on someone," Cas said, looking down at her cup. They all laughed.

"I think charismatic is the wrong word. I'd use eccentric," Ted said.

"That is probably more accurate," Cas said, nodding.

"So, Cas, what do you do?" Marshall asked when the conversation fell into a lull.

"I'm a Psychologist," she said, smiling.

"Oh that's cool," he said, and Lily and Ted nodded in agreement.

"What about you guys?" She asked, not really sure what else to say.

"I'm an architect," Ted said, almost puffing his chest out in pride. Cas covered her smile with a hand.

"I teach kindergarden," Lily said, smiling.

"I'm in law school," Marshall said. "And I really should be studying right now, I have a huge test on Monday."

"Oh come on, it's only ten," Ted complained as Marshall and Lily both slid out of the booth.

"It was nice meeting you," Cas said, smiling at them. They seemed like nice people.

"You too," Lily said, finishing off the beer in her mug as she stood. "We will have to hang out again sometime," she said, then turned and winked at Ted who rolled his eyes. Cas looked away, sure she wasn't supposed to have seen that.

"Sooo," Ted began, turning to face her in the booth. Before he could continue, Barney slid into the bench across from them, grinning.

"Hey," he said to Cas, then turned to Ted. "So Ted, I found the perfect girl for you, she's over there," he nodded toward a booth on the other side of the room. Ted turned to look at the girl he had nodded to, as did Cas. She was reading a book, and her dark hair kept falling into her eyes, and she kept brushing it back.

"Why is she perfect?" Ted asked skeptically, turning back to Barney.

"Look at her! She's totally boring. Who comes to a bar on a Friday night to read a book alone in a booth? Go talk to her," Barney said. Cas laughed.

"She's probably waiting for someone," she said, shaking her head. "The book is a way to keep other people from approaching her.

"Nah, she's not looking at the door when new people come in, and she's been here for half an hour. If she's waiting for someone, she knows they aren't going to show up," Barney said, watching the girl again. "Plus she's like a four, they are always desperate." Cas rolled her eyes.

"No thanks," Ted said, sipping his drink. Barney huffed and turned back to him, then frowned.

"I thought I told you to lose the goatee?" He said, glaring now.

"Yeah you did… ten minutes ago," Ted nodded.

"Well why isn't it gone yet?" Barney asked, frowning. Cas shook her head and smiled as they launched into an argument. For just meeting Ted today, Barney had a lot of opinions about his life.

Cas sat through their argument as it turned from facial hair to hot girls to jobs to clothes and then back to facial hair without saying anything before deciding that she was done with the night. She yawned, then stood and stretched her arms out in front of her.

"Well I'm going home," she said to the two men who were still arguing. Both of them lifted a hand to wave farewell without stopping the argument. She rolled her eyes and left the building, turning right to walk to her apartment.

"Wait, Cas," she heard someone call from behind her and turned to see Barney coming up the steps from the bar.

"What?" She asked as he approached.

"I just... Uh," he rubbed the back of his neck and she raised an eyebrow.

"You want to make sure I'm not jumping off any buildings tonight?" She asked, trying not to smile.

"I just wanted to make sure you're okay today," he said grinning.

"I'm fine. Stop worrying," she said, smiling.

"I'll walk you home if you want," he said, falling into step beside her. She shrugged and they walked in silence for about thirty seconds.

"Okay thanks," she said, coming to a stop at the base of the next set of stairs.

"You live here?" He asked, looking up at the building, then back to the bar.

"Yep. Number 202. That's my window," she said, pointing at the window to the right of the front door. There was a business in the bottom of the building, just like the bar, but it was a weird "psychic" place she had never been to. The bottom of her window came to just above her head when she stood on the street, so she always left the curtains closed to prevent people on the street from looking in. Her bed was positioned just under the window, so at night after she turned out the lights she could just barely see the stars, if the night was clear.

"Want to go back to the bar tomorrow night?" He asked, glancing down at her.

"You don't need to keep inviting me places to make sure I'm still alive you know," she said, resisting the urge to laugh.

"I know," he said, shrugging. "But we are going to be friends, so we should probably hang out." She looked him over, one eyebrow raised.

"Fine, friends," she said, nodding. She walked up the five steps to her front door and pulled out the key to unlock it.

"Nine?" He asked from the bottom of the steps.

"Sure, it's a date," she said, pulling open the door and turning to look at him.

"No it's not," he said, but he was smiling.

"I know," she said, then walked the rest of the way into the building, letting the door fall shut behind her.

88888

The next few months seemed to fly by. Barney invited her to the bar every night the first week until she got into the habit of going and he stopped having to call her. She just knew that if she went to MacLaren's around nine, either Barney, Ted, Lily, or Marshall would be there. She had gotten to know all of them quite well, since she saw them almost every day now. She had acquired all of their phone numbers for one reason or another, helped Barney pick out girls they thought Ted would like, and even, a few times, played wingman to Barney. She thought his stunts to get women to go home with him were usually ridiculous, but it was fun to act like someone she wasn't, whether that was someone who had slept with Barney in the past and would 'accidentally run into him and pretend to want him back to make him more appealing' or someone like his personal assistant because he was an 'actor,' 'musician,' or 'someone famous for something.'

She might have felt bad for helping him lie to girls, but honestly, if they were desperate enough to go home with him at the end of the night, that was their problem.

She thought the main reason she stuck around with the group was because none of them really lied, not about big things anyway. If one of them asked an embarrassing question, the others usually just answered it honestly, though sometimes the truth was disguised by making the answer sound sarcastic, or not telling all of it. She thought they were funny. She usually stayed quiet at their gatherings, only speaking up when someone spoke directly to her, but they all seemed to like her, so she was content to stay quiet. And she made extra sure not to point out when they were lying. She didn't want them to think she was a freak.

"I'll get the next round," Cas said as Barney stood to go up to the bar. Being a girl, it was a to easier for her to get drinks than it was for Barney or Ted to. She thought it was funny, Barney thought it was unfair, since, as he was always saying, hot guys should be served just as fast as hot girls.

"Hey Barney, you see that girl over there?" She heard Ted ask, and turned to look where he was looking. She hadn't even heard him come up behind her.

"Oh yeah, you just know she likes it dirty," Barney said. "Go say hi." Cas shook her head and grabbed three of the drinks, then nudged Barney to get the other two as Ted turned back to them in protest. She had just made it to the table when she heard Barney say "Hi. Haaaave you met Ted?"

"Thanks Cas," Lily said, pulling her drink toward her as Barney set down the last one, having left Ted's drink on the bar for him.

"So who's the girl?" Marshall asked, watching Ted talk to the girl he had seen across the room.

"Dunno," Barney shrugged, taking a sip of his scotch. Cas never drank anything stronger than beer. She was not a pleasant drunk, and she usually got drunk super easily, so getting tipsy off beer was as far as she went on their nightly bar visits.

"Jerk," they heard the woman say a few minutes later, and they turned in time to see her throw her drink in his face. Cas noticed her smile back at him though as she walked away and was confused for only a moment before Ted came back over to them.

"Denied," Barney said mockingly.

"Nope," Ted said, settling back into his chair. "We are going out for dinner tomorrow night." They all laughed at Barney's surprised look as Ted used a napkin to wipe off the remains of the drink from his face.

"So, who is she?" Lily asked, watching Ted with a raised eyebrow.

"Robin Scherbatsky, she's a news reporter," Ted said, smiling.

"Oh, I've seen her before. She does those not important pieces on animals doing weird things right?" Cas asked, looking back at the woman in the corner booth. "I thought she looked a little familiar."

"Yeah that's her," Ted said. He then launched into making a plan for dinner the next night, listening to what Lily said while ignoring Barney's suggestions.

Cas zoned out for about ten minutes, slowly sipping her beer while ignoring the four of them making dinner plans.

"You got engaged?" Barney asked loudly, drawing her back to the present. Cas looked back to Lily and Marshall in surprise.

"You did? Congratulations!" She said, grinning. They did look really happy together.

"No no no, not congratulations. Marriage is the most horrible thing you can do!" Barney said loudly, acting panicked. Cas laughed, and took another sip of her beer.

* * *

The next evening, Cas and the others were sitting around a table in the bar, listening to Ted tell them about his night with Robin. The whole story sounded really romantic, which she was beginning to see was just Ted's way of doing things.

"You should have kissed her," she chimed in, and the others nodded in agreement.

"No way, I didn't get the signal," Ted said, shaking his head. The others proceeded to mock him, and then randomly, Barney turned to Marshall and kissed him. Cas burst out laughing as Marshall tried to tell Lily that he hadn't been giving Barney the signal.

"You should have kissed her," the bartender said after he brought another drink out to them, which set the table to laughing again.

"I should have kissed her," he repeated, frowning. "I'm going to her house." He said, standing up.

"Ted, it's after midnight, you can't," Lily said, watching him. Cas finished off her drink right as Lily grabbed her wrist and dragged her up. "We're coming with you," she said, pulling Marshall up as well. They started toward the door, Barney finally following them too. The five of them squeezed into a cab together and were off to Robin's apartment. Cas was squeezed in the back seat between Barney and Marshall, with Lily against the door and Ted in the front seat. She was quiet the whole ride, only laughing when Ted ran out of a building holding a blue french horn and yelling to go, then sitting in silence as Robin let Ted into the building. She ignored the casual conversation between the others until Lily got out to use the bathroom.

"I'll come with," Cas said, making Marshall get out of the car to let her out too. The two girls walked to the bodega and found the bathrooms pretty quickly.

"So, how did you meet Barney? I don't think I ever asked," Lily said as she straightened her clothes in the mirror as Cas washed her hands.

"Oh, I met him at a party. In the Empire State Building," Cas said, not looking up.

"Oh that's cool, what was the party for?" Lily asked, now messing with her hair.

"I dunno, I wasn't actually there for the party, I was just sneaking through the party because I wanted to go up to the observation deck after hours. The security in that place is so lax. Barney followed me up and we started talking and then we decided to go to the bar later. And now we are friends," she said, smiling as she tossed her paper towels into the trash and the two girls left the bathroom.

"Well that's cool," Lily said as they left the building and headed back to the cab. As they approached, they could hear Marshall talking to Barney about Lily and how he wasn't scared at all to marry her. Cas smiled as the couple kissed through the open cab window, then climbed in, sitting in the front seat this time.

"Yep. Cool," Cas repeated, tucking her hands into her pockets. They decided to leave about twenty minutes later, assuming Ted would be staying longer.

* * *

"What?" The whole table cried out in surprise as they listened to Ted tell them about the night.

"You told her you loved her?" Lily asked, her mouth hanging open.

"I know, I know, it was stupid," Ted said, shaking his head mournfully. "And then we shook hands, and I said something about being a good hand-shaker, and then I left," he said, then looked up at the silent table. "What?"

"That was the signal!" Lily said. "You should have kissed her!"

"That was the signal," the cab driver who had joined them for a drink, said.

"Whatever, you guys weren't there," Ted said as Marshall popped the cork out of a champagne bottle and poured them all cups, then turned to face to Lily.

"To my fiancee," he said, holding his cup up.

"To the future," Lily said, smiling.

"To one hell of a night!" the cab driver, Ranjit said, holding his cup up.

Cas left the group a couple minutes later, saying she needed to get some sleep, though really she just wanted to go home and curl up on her couch and watch a movie. Something quiet, without people.

"Cas," the now familiar voice drew her to a stop just as she reached the top of the bar's steps.

"Yeah Barney?" She asked, turning to look at him. He had stopped at the bottom of the stairs and was looking up at her.

"Are you okay?" He asked, not looking away from her.

"I'm fine," she said, smiling. He had been doing this at least twice a week since they had met. She though it was nice of him, a little way of letting her know she was cared about.

"Okay, just checking," he said, then turned and disappeared back into the bar. She smiled the rest of the way home.

* * *

The next evening, Cas went down to the bar early, because she was bored of sitting at home.

"Cas!" Lily called from behind her just as she was opening the bar door.

"Hey," Cas said, waiting for Lily to catch up.

"No Marshall tonight?" Cas asked as they walked up to the bar.

"No, he has to study tonight," Lily said. They ordered their drinks then turned to make their way to their usual booth.

"Hey, isn't that Robin?" Cas asked, happening to glance toward the next person coming in the door. Lily turned around and grinned.

"Robin!" She called, waving to the woman who looked startled. Robin got a drink from the bar, then came over to sit in the empty booth seat Lily and Cas had left for her.

"We're Ted's friends," Cas explained since Robin looked confused.

"We recognized you from the news," Lily said, holding her hand out to shake. "I'm Lily, this is Cas."

"Oh, okay, I was wondering if we had met and I just forgot," she said, smiling as she returned Lily's handshake. "It's nice to meet you. So... Ted's friends huh?"

"Yep. And speaking of Ted, what do we think of him?" Lily asked, jumping straight to the point.

"Ted's… something else," Robin said, laughing. "He comes on a little strong."

"But that's part of his charm," Lily said, nudging Cas to agree. She just nodded.

"Oh, totally. I mean, he's sweet, he's charming, he's just looking for something a little bit more serious than I am," Robin said, shrugging. "I mean the most I can handle right now is something casual." She took another sip of her drink and the others followed her example. "This just stays between us, right?" Robin asked, looking between the two girls.

"Are you kidding?" Lily asked, grinning. "This flapper is Fort Knox," she finished. Cas just nodded in agreement.

"Robin!" Ted said as he, Barney and Marshall approached the table.

"Hey," Robin said, looking up at Ted as the others slid into the booth or grabbed a chair.

"Look who we ran into," Lily said, gesturing to Robin.

"Since when do you guys know each other?" Ted asked, sitting on a chair at the end of the table.

"Uh... since about," she began then pointed to the top of her glass, "here." Cas and Lily laughed. "Lily recognized me from the news and-" she stopped talking as Marshall and Lily began to make out beside Cas, who scooted over to the very edge of the seat. "Hello, Sailor!" Robin finished, laughing.

"They just got engaged," Ted said as a way of explanation.

"Ah. Well, I should get back to the station. See you guys," she said, standing up and finishing off her drink. Marshall raised a hand in farewell without stopping the kiss with Lily and Cas laughed again, waving as well.

"Nice seeing you, Ted." Robin said, smiling at him.

"Yeah, you too," Ted said, then turned to watch her leave. Cas stood and sat on the bench Robin had just vacated as Barney walked over with a pitcher of beer and set it on the table.

"Damn it." Ted said when she was out of the building.

"What?" Lily asked, finally surfacing.

"I'm in love with her," Ted said, still staring at the door, his face sad. Barney smacked the back of his head, drawing his attention away from the door as he sat next to Cas in the empty place at the table.

"No! As your sponsor I will not let you relapse," Barney said, pouring himself a mug of beer. "You blew it, it's over, move on."

"I don't know!" Ted said, glancing back at the door again as though expecting Robin to come back in. "I just have this feeling. She's the future Mrs. Ted Mosby." Lily let out a half squeak half snort, then covered her mouth. Cas had to stop herself from laughing.

"Lily, you squeaked?" Ted asked, looking back to the table. Lily just shook her head. "She said something about me didn't she? Come on, spill it, Red." Cas was full out laughing now as Lily spilled the entire story immediately, ending with an 'oops' as she told him she had promised not to tell.

"She wants casual. Okay, I'll be casual," Ted said, frowning. "I'm gonna be a mushroom cloud of casual. You know why? Cause it's a game! I wanted to skip to the end and do the 'happily ever after' thing but you don't get there unless you play the game."

"So you're gonna ask her out?" Marshall asked to clarify.

"Yeah," Ted began, then paused. "No! I can't ask her out, because if I ask her out I'm asking her out. So how do I ask her out, without asking her out?" They all sat in silence for a moment, trying to figure out if Ted had just made any sense.

"Did you guys get high?" Lily asked, breaking the silence. Cas let out a little laugh.

"I got it! I don't ask her out…" Ted began, smiling. "I invite her to our party next Friday."

"We're having a party next Friday?" Marshall asked, looking over at Lily. Lily just shrugged, letting him know she didn't know any more than he did.

"We are now-Casual," Ted said, leaning back in his chair as though he had just come to the perfect solution.

"Yeah, cuz nothing says "Casual" like inviting a hundred people over just to mack on one girl" Barney said sarcastically. "Oh, and Lily, that's my leg." He said, turning to the red head.

"You waited five minutes to tell me that?" Lily asked incredulously, sitting straighter in her seat.

"Alright... so call her up!" Marshall said, and Cas turned back to the others.

"No. Calling's not casual!" Ted said, thinking again. "I just gotta bump into her somewhere. If only I knew her schedule I could arrange a 'chance' encounter." Cas laughed at that.

"That's great, Ted," Cas said. "You'll be the most 'casual' stalker ever." They all laughed at that.

Cas left a few minutes after that when Lily and Marshall left as well.

When she got home she quickly shed her clothes, replacing them with pajamas, then went to the bathroom to scrub her makeup off. She had been wearing it almost every day now, since she went out almost every night. Finally, when she was ready for bed, she curled up on the couch and grabbed the book she was reading so she would have something to do until she was tired enough to sleep.

* * *

She woke to her phone ringing around eight in the morning.

"Hello," she said after clearing her throat so she wouldn't sound tired. She didn't recognize the number.

"Hello, this is Mary Swanson from Columbia University, I'm looking for Cassie Reynolds?" The woman said, and Cas sat up fast.

"Speaking," she said, doing her best to sound professional.

"Hi, I'm calling you regarding the résumé you sent in last week. As it turns out, we do have an opening for a school psychologist and we would like to interview you on Monday," the woman said, and Cas grinned.

"That sounds great," she said, running a hand through her hair to get it off her face. "What time would you like me to come in?"

"Nine o'clock," the woman said.

"That's perfect," Cas said, sweeping her legs off the bed to stand and nearly falling over when her foot got caught in the blanket.

"Great. Come to the registration office first thing and they can direct you to the University President's office," she said.

"Alright. Thank you so much," Cas said as she caught her balance again and said goodbye to the woman on the phone then hung up. She stood there grinning like an idiot for a second, then put her hands on her hips and looked around the room. What now? She didn't feel like making breakfast, and she wasn't really hungry, but there wasn't much else to do. With a sigh she twisted her hair up into a messy bun and started walking across the floor. Before she could reach the kitchen, the door buzzer rang, then rang again and again as though someone were frantically pushing the button. She pushed the button to let whoever it was in, and opened her apartment door as they came inside.

"Barney?" She asked, frowning as he came up the stairs. He hadn't been here before, but she must have told him the number and forgotten. She closed the door behind him.

"Can you do me a huge favor?" He asked, not even looking around her apartment.

"At eight in the morning?" She asked, rolling her eyes. "You usually wait until the evening to need a wingman."

"Not that. Look, this is going to sound weird, but can you pretend to be my fiancee for like, fifteen minutes?" He asked, then looked her over and frowned. "Did I wake you up?"

"No," she said, "and shouldn't you be at work?" She asked, then shook her head. "Why do you need a fiancé for fifteen minutes?"

"Well, my mom's in the hospital," he began, then paused. "And it doesn't look like she's going to make it," he continued, then stopped at the look of horror on Cas's face. "She always wanted to see me get married, so can you just visit her and pretend we are getting married?" Cas just nodded, a worried look on her face.

"Are you okay?" She asked, looking him over.

"Eh," he said, shrugging, but not answering. "Come on, get dressed," he said, gesturing toward the rest of the apartment.

"Of course," she said, turning back to the room. "Uh, you can sit, I'll just be a minute," she didn't wait to see if he sat, but rushed to find a pair of slacks and a blouse, then hurried to the bathroom. She stripped off her pajama shorts and tank top, pulling the other clothes on and trying to brush her teeth at the same time, then she brushed her hair and twisted it back into a neater bun, and brushed on some quick makeup. She was out in the living room again within five minutes, and walked over to drop her pajamas on her bed and grab her key, phone and wallet.

"Let's go," she said, nodding to the door.

"Why do you live in such a little apartment?" He asked as she locked the door behind her.

"I like it," she said, shrugging. "Plus I haven't had a job for three months."

"Really?" He asked, holding up a hand to call a cab over. He gave the cab driver the address as they settled int he back seat.

"Yeah, I quit my last one right before I met you," she said, shrugging as the cab pulled back into traffic.

"I could find something for you at GNB if you want," he said, looking out the window. He sounded like he wasn't concerned about his mother at all, but Cas noticed that his knuckles were white as he clenched his fists.

"No thanks," she said. "And what is it you do there, you've ever said," she asked, continuing the conversation to try to distract him.

"Please," he said, flapping a hand at her. "Here's fine," he said to the cabbie, and they climbed out onto the sidewalk in front of the hospital. Barney led her past the front desk and through the hallways to an elevator, then through more hallways, finally coming to a stop outside a door.

"Oh, here," he said, grabbing her left hand. He lifted it for a second, and she felt a band of cool metal on her finger. She looked down as he released it and couldn't help but smile. Then Barney pushed the door open and grabbed her hand to pull her through. He tried to release her hand as they approached the bed, but she held on.

"Mom," he said softly. The woman didn't look much like Barney. Her hair was bright red and very curly. She opened her eyes and smiled up at Barney and Cas could see that she had the same bright blue eyes as Barney did. She smiled.

"Mom, this is Betty. We're engaged!" Barney said, letting go of Cas's hand to wrap his arm around her waist. Cas shot him one little glare at the name, then turned back to the woman on the bed.

"Hi Mrs. Stinson, it's so nice to finally meet you," Cas said, and let the older woman grab her hands.

"You see, Mom?" Barney said, smiling as he leaned over the bed. "I found someone who makes me happy, just as you wished."

"It's beautiful," she said, smiling weakly and closing her eyes again. "I wish I could stay for the grandchildren." Cas's eyes widened and she glanced at Barney who raised an eyebrow and cocked his head a little, as though telling her to go with it.

"I'm pregnant!" Cas said, grinning. The woman opened her eyes again and smiled widely.

"That's great dear," she said softly.

"We'll let you sleep now mom, I'll be back later," Barney said, and the woman released Cas's hands and closed her eyes again, a smile on her face. The two of them left the room and didn't speak until they were back in the lobby.

"Great job, I think she bought it," Barney said as they flagged a cab back to her apartment again.

"Barney, are you really okay?" Cas asked as the car pulled up.

"I'm fine," he said, but she could tell he was lying. No one was fine when their mother was in the hospital, so she let the lie slide and didn't say anything until they pulled up to her apartment. "Did you want to stay here today?" She asked, as she climbed out of the car. He shrugged. "We can watch Die Hard, I just got it on DVD." She smiled as he began to climb out of the cab too.

"Alright fine," he said, then paid the driver and followed her up the steps to her apartment. She kicked off her shoes by the door and left it open for him to come inside. He closed the door and shrugged out of his suit jacket, then sat on the couch as she found the DVD and started the movie. She curled up against the arm of the couch as the movie began, leaving plenty of room for Barney to sit comfortably at the other end of the couch. He didn't say anything through the movie. Or through Die Hard 2. Or 3. Finally she stood and stretched.

"You want to get some lunch? It's like two and I haven't eaten today," she said, then looked over at him. He had fallen asleep, his head against the back of the couch. She smiled and went over to her bed to get a throw blanket to cover him up, then she sat down and picked up her book, starting where she had left off the previous night. It was half past six when Barney's phone started ringing. Cas had taken a shower, made her bed, and eaten a bagel by then, and had turned the light on to continue reading on the other end of the couch. She looked up as his phone began to ring. He had set it on the arm of the couch, but he didn't look like he was waking up so she reached over to look at the screen. It was Ted, so she answered it.

"Barney Stinson's phone," she said, pretending to be formal.

"Oh, hi Cas, so I may have changed the party to tonight instead of next week, will you be there?" Ted asked, sounding sheepish. It took her a minute to figure out what he was talking about, and then she rolled her eyes. She glanced back at Barney, only to jump in surprise to see that he was awake, and that she was much closer to him than she had though. She leaned back, before speaking.

"Ted's party is now tonight, wanna go?" She asked, covering the receiver with one hand. He shrugged.

"Sure," she told Ted. "We'll be there."

"Great, thanks, its at eight, bye," he said, then hung up the phone. She shook her head as she handed Barney's phone back to him.

"Ted's party is at eight," she said as Barney put the phone back into his pocket. "It's almost seven now. You slept for a while."

"Oops," he said, standing up.

"It's fine, you probably needed it," she said. "When's the last time you slept? You've been looking tired for weeks.

"I sleep enough, don't try to parent me," he said, running a hand over his hair. She shrugged, turning back to her book. "Can you not tell anyone? You know, about my mom and stuff?" He asked, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Sure, I won't say anything," she said, smiling up at him. He smiled back, but it looked halfhearted. She frowned and stood too. "Look, I know you aren't the touchy-feely kind of person, but can I give you a hug, please," she said, looking at him. He nodded, and she stepped forward to wrap her arms around his middle and rest the side of her face against his shoulder. It took him a minute, but he wrapped his arms around her shoulders and hugged her back. She smiled against his shoulder and stroked his back with one hand, then pulled away.

"Thanks," he said, then cleared his throat and tucked his hands into his pocket. "Where's my jacket?" he asked looking at the couch where he had left it. She had moved it after he had fallen asleep so it wouldn't fall on the floor.

"It's on the desk chair. With the other one I stole from you months ago," she said, grinning. "I forgot to give it back."

"I was wondering where that went," he said, walking across the room. He was lying, she could tell. He had known where it was and just never asked for it back. She smiled.

"Let me grab a sweater and we can go over to Ted and Marshall's," she called as she walked behind the partition that cut off her bed and dresser from the rest of the room. She hunted through the drawers for one, then, after finding one, she shrugged it on and walked back to the living room. Barney was still at the desk, looking over something.

"Whats this?" He asked, turning the paper back to her. She stared at it for a second, then realized what it was.

"Oh, that was my, uh, suicide note, from when I went to the balcony," she said, taking it from him and crumpling it up, then stuffing it into her pocket. He opened his mouth, then closed it, then opened it again.

"Let's go," she said, walking to the door. He followed silently, and she could feel him watching the back of her head.

"Can I ask you something?" He asked as they reached the street.

"Later," she said, knowing what he wanted to know. She had written about being able to know lies from truth in that letter. She let out a breath when he didn't continue, and turned up the steps to Ted and Marshall's apartment. He was silent all the way up to the apartment, and headed to the kitchen for a beer as soon as he came in. They were still early so no one else was there yet besides Lily and Marshall, both sitting on the couch.

"Hey guys," Cas said, sitting in an empty chair. Barney came back into the room and handed her a beer, then sat in the empty space on the couch.

"Hey," Lily said, smiling. Just then Ted came in, carrying a paper bag full of chips and another full of dip. He set both down in the kitchen, then came back to the living room.

"So, Gatsby, what are you gonna do when Robin shows up?" Marshall asked, looking over at Ted.

"Okay, I got it all planned out," he said, leaning forward, his face eager. "She steps through the door, and where's Ted? Not eagerly waiting by the door. Nah I'm across the room at my drafting table showing some foxy young thing all my cool architecture stuff." He gestured behind them to his desk. "So Robin strolls over and I casually give her one of these, "Hey, what's up?" She says, "Hey, nice place etcetera, etcetera". And then I say, "Well make yourself at home," and I casually return to my conversation. Then, an hour later, "Oh, you're still here?" I say like I don't really care, but it's a nice surprise. And then very casually, "Wanna see the roof?"

"The roof," Marshall and Lily say at the same time, nodding in approval.

"Get her up to the roof and the roof takes care of the rest," Ted said, smiling.

"What's so special about the roof?" Barney asked, his face obviously doubting Ted's plan.

"Oh, the moon, the stars, the shimmering skyline," Lily explained. "You can't not fall in love on that roof."

"We do it up there sometimes," Marshall added and Cas laughed. People had started to arrive by then and the front door was left open.

"Solid plan, my little friend," Barney said, surprising Cas. She had thought he wouldn't like the plan, because usually he said no to all Ted's plans just to mess with him.

"We're the same height," Ted said, frowning.

"But may I suggest one little modification?" Barney continued, not listening to Ted. "That foxy young thing you were chatting up, take her up to the roof and have sex with her! Crazy monkey-style."

"That's not the plan," Ted said, rolling his eyes.

"Should be the plan, I mean look at her. Ted, look at her. She's smoking'!" Barney said, gesturing to the empty air by his desk. Cas smothered another laugh.

"Yeah, but she's not Robin," Ted said, shaking his head.

"Exactly!" Barney said, smirking. "Ted, let's rap. Statistic, at every New York party there's always a girl who has no idea whose party she's at. She knows no one you know, and you will never see her again. Do you see," he paused. "Where I'm going," he paused again, using his hands to make his point. "Hu-with this?"

"Barney, I don't wanna say-" Ted began, but was cut off. By this time quite a few people had arrived, and their little group had moved to stand near the door.

"Aargh!" Barney said, cutting Ted off. He mimed pulling down a scope and looking around the room. "Scoping, beep, scoping, beep!"

"Man you're a dork," Lily said, and they laughed.

"Beep, beep, beep, beep. Target acquired!" Barney said, looking at a blond woman who looked like she was there alone. "And now it's time we play a little game I like to call 'Haaaave You Met Ted?'"

"No, come on not this," Ted complained as Barney drew him across the room. Barney tapped her on the shoulder.

"Hi! Have you met Ted?" He asked, pushing Ted forward.

"No," the woman said, smiling politely.

"Hi," Ted said.

"Hi," she replied.

"Do you know Marshall? Lily? Cas?" Barney asked, gesturing to their little group.

"No," she said, and smiled.

"Hmm, do you know anyone at this party?" Barney asked.

"I work with Carlos," she said.

"Excuse me," Barney said, drawing Ted back to the group. "Anyone know a Carlos?" They all said no or shook their heads. "On a silver platter! 'Bone' appetite!" He said to Ted, who rolled his eyes.

"I don't think so," he said, shaking his head.

"Your loss, her gain," Barney said, straightening his tie and going back over to the girl. "Excuse me, can I show you the roof? It's magical up there!" He put a hand on her shoulder to guide her toward the window.

"Sure," the woman said, smiling at him.

"Whoa-whoa-Hey hey. I got that roof reserved!" Ted said, coming towards them,

"Dude, Robin's not coming," Barney said over his shoulder.

"Hey, she's goanna show up," he said. Barney ignored him and led the girl up the fire escape. "She'll show up," he said to the others who all just nodded.

"Let me know how it goes," Cas said, finishing off her beer. "I need to cut out early tonight, sorry guys," she said, heading toward the door.

"Bye," she heard them call, then she walked out of the apartment, closing the door behind her. It wasn't late, barely past nine, but she really didn't want to be around people much longer. It wasn't until she got home that she realized she was still wearing the ring Barney had given her. She grinned. It would have been hard to explain if someone had noticed it. She took it off and found an old ring box in her dresser, then put it inside so she wouldn't lose it.

* * *

When she woke up the next day, she had a text saying "the party continues tonight!" from Ted. She groaned. She really wasn't in the mood to party. She hadn't slept well last night, and she was starting to develop a headache.

"Sorry, I can't make it, I have things to do today," she texted back, then jumped up to take a shower. She didn't really have much to do today. She had to find something nice to wear to her interview on Monday. She had a few dressy outfits, but she wanted to make sure she had the perfect one, which meant a little shopping. She thought about calling Lily to go with her, but the little red head was too energetic for Cas to handle today. She sat on her bed, her hair wrapped in a towel, just wearing her bra and underwear, staring down at her phone. She could call Robin… the woman had given Cas her number when her and Lily had run into her and had a drink the other day, but she wasn't sure if the other woman would have time to go shopping, or if she even liked shopping. Her phone was at her ear, ringing, before she had really made up her mind.

"Hello?" Robin answered.

"Uh, hey Robin, this is Cas, we met the other day, I was with Lily…" Cas said, then trailed off, feeling like an idiot.

"Oh yeah, hey, whats up?" Robin asked, and Cas sighed.

"This is going to sound really weird, but I have a job interview on Monday, and I have no idea what to wear to it… I was wondering if you wanted to go shopping with me? I'm really bad at picking out professional looking outfits," she tried to explain. To her relief, Robin laughed.

"Sure, but I work at one, can it be before then?" Robin asked, and Cas smiled.

"Sure, I'm free right now, where should we go?" She asked. Robin gave her the address of a boutique store she liked, then hung up the phone. Cas grinned as she threw on jeans and a blouse, then went to blow dry her hair and put on a little makeup. She had discovered over the last couple months that she actually liked wearing makeup, and taking the time to do her hair. It made her feel more confident, to look nice. She let her blonde hair fall down her back naturally today, instead of putting it up like she usually did.

She met Robin in front of the store and they both went inside after saying hello.

"Thanks for helping me," Cas said as they looked through the women's business suits on the racks. "Lily's a little too hyper for me to deal with today, and I don't have any other female friends," she said, taking a dark blue ensemble off the rack to look at it more closely.

"No problem. I feel like I haven't had time to do anything but work since I moved here. I haven't had time to meet anyone, and I haven't been shopping in ages," Robin said, draping an outfit over her arm for Cas to try on.

"Oh, no skirts," she said, seeing what Robin had picked. "Just something with slacks would be good. I don't like skirts. Not for business things anyway," she said. Robin nodded and hung the outfit back up, picking another one instead. When they had four or five things for her, they went back to the dressing rooms, Robin going back out to look at clothes while Cas tried on the ones she had.

"Hey Robin?" She asked, coming out of the dressing room, wearing one of the outfits Robin had picked. It was a dark gray suit that fit her decently. "Does this look okay? It's the one I liked the best," she said as Robin came over to look.

"Yeah, I like it, you just need a white blouse or something to go underneath and it's perfect," Robin said, smiling.

"Great," Cas said, going back to change out of it. A few minutes later she left the dressing room with the suit she wanted draped over her arm, to see Robin waiting for her.

"Hey, I got called in to work early. I'm so sorry," Robin said, frowning worriedly.

"Hey, no problem, we found an outfit anyway," Cas said, grinning. "Thanks for coming with me. I'll see you later."

"Bye!" Robin said, hurrying from the shop. Cas paid for her things, adding a pair of nice dress shoes to the pile, then left, taking the subway back to her apartment.

That night around seven, her door buzzer went off again. After stripping off the jeans and blouse she had worn out that day, she hadn't bothered to put more clothes on, she had settled onto her couch and started reading in her underwear and a camisole. She jumped up and buzzed the door.

"Hello?" She asked through the intercom.

"It's Barney," he replied. She rolled her eyes and buzzed the door, then ran to grab her pajama shorts from her bed and pull them on, then she pulled on a sweater over her thin shirt just as he opened the door and came in.

"Aren't you going to the party?" He asked, seeing her pajamas.

"Not tonight," she said, shaking her head. "I've had a headache all day and I don't really want to be around a ton of people right now," she said, settling back into the couch. He let out an over dramatic sigh.

"You are so boring," he said.

"Yep," she replied, picking up her book again. She smiled as he let out another sigh.

"Fine," he said, "but you will be missing out."

"Call me if anything interesting happens," she said, not looking up.

"Fine," he said, plopping down onto her couch and picking up the tv remote. She ignored him as he scanned through the channels, finally picking a National Geographic documentary on elk, something she never would have thought he would watch. They sat in silence for about half an hour.

"Did you come over here for anything in particular?" She asked as the time for the party to start grew nearer.

"No," he said, but she could tell he was lying. "Well, yeah, actually. Your note…" he trailed off. She shut her book and turned to look at him.

"What about it?" She asked, wanting him to say it.

"You can… know when someone is lying or not?" He asked, not looking at her.

"Yep," she said.

"And you've never been wrong?" He asked again, still watching the tv.

"Nope," she said, turning on her folded legs to face him. He glanced at her.

"That… is pretty awesome," he said, and she grinned. He looked over at her and she sighed.

"Oh go on and try it, I know you want to," she said, rolling her eyes. The first thing anyone did when they found out was try to lie convincingly to her.

"My birthday is March second," he said, looking at her.

"Lie," she said, her smile growing. He was taking this a lot better than other people she had told.

"July 8th," he said.

"Lie."

"December-"

"Lie. Come on."

"July 23rd," he said.

"True," she grinned.

"How does that work?" He asked, turning to face her now. "You should stand behind girls I talk to and tell me if they are lying."

"First, no, I'm not doing that," she said, rolling her eyes. "Second, I have no idea how it works, it just does." He nodded.

"Weird," he said, then grinned and stood.

"That's me," she said, opening her book again. "I'll see you tomorrow, probably," she said, her eyes on the page.

"Probably?" He asked, and she looked up again, one eyebrow raised.

"Yes. I might get hit by a bus before tomorrow," she said. He frowned. "I'm kidding. I'm just not sure that I'll be up for going to the bar tomorrow. I think I'm getting a cold."

"Ha ha," he said sarcastically, then shook his head. She frowned.

"Sorry, I won't joke about dying anymore," she said, wondering if that was the problem. He shrugged, then smiled, opening his mouth again, but instead of speaking, he just closed it and shook his head.

"Bye," he said, walking toward the door.

"Bye," she said as it fell shut behind him.

She went to sleep pretty early that night, worn out from having not slept well the night before. She spent the next day cleaning. She wasn't sure how her apartment could get so dusty and need vacuuming every week, but it did. She had just settled in to finish her book when the door buzzer rang again. She buzzed the door open and sat back down, assuming, correctly, that it was Barney again.

"So, the party continues tonight," Barney said, opening her door.

"No thanks," she said, returning to her book. She only had one chapter left.

"I agree, it's Sunday night, no one's gonna go to that," Barney said, turning on the tv as he sat down again.

"You didn't take your jacket," she said, pointing to the desk chair where his suit jacket still hung.

"I didn't want to leave it at Ted's," he said, shrugging. They fell into silence for a while. It only took her fifteen minutes to finish the chapter.

"So Robin didn't show up last night either?" Cas asked, setting her book on the table by the couch.

"Nope," Barney said, shrugging. "And there's this crazy chick who keeps talking to me and she keeps showing up even though no one knows who she is." Cas shook her head and smiled.

"That's Karma, for lying to her in the first place," she said.

"Who said anything about lying?" He asked, she raised an eyebrow at him. "Okay I may have lied a little. But she should learn how to take a hint."

"Good luck with that," she said, laughing. "It's almost eight, shouldn't you be going?" He groaned and stood.

"You sure you don't want to come? There will be less people there than before," he said, pausing by the door to put his shoes back on.

"No thanks. Maybe tomorrow night," she said, smiling.

"Okay fine, bye," he said, then shut the door behind him. Cas sighed and sat back down on the couch, leaning her head back. She was roused almost an hour later by her phone letting her know she got a text.

"Bar in ten, just the gang," Barney had sent her. She smiled and stood to find some clothes. Obviously the last party hadn't worked out either. She locked her door behind her and made her way to the bar, arriving just as they all sat down at the booth, a pitcher of beer on the table in front of them. She wandered over, taking a seat next to Barney on the bench he shared with Robin.

"That's just a recipe for disaster. They work together!" Barney said, gesturing towards a couple making out at the bar.

"You jealous?" Ted asked, a smirk on his face.

"Oh please, What does Carlos have that I don't?" He asked, gesturing to himself.

"A date tonight?" Robin said, causing everyone around the table to laugh.

"Oh, rewind, play it again," Lily said. Robin made the sound like a tape rewinding.

"A date tonight?" She repeated, and everyone laughed again.

"I don't think I like her," Barney said, in a joking tone. Cas could tell he was lying. Robin was an instant fit with the group.

The subject changed to a paper Marshall was writing, then Ted got up to get beer, Robin following. Cas couldn't see what was happening, but within moments, Robin returned to the table and Ted was chatting up another girl at the bar.

"Damn, he moves fast," Cas muttered, watching as Ted and the girl left the bar together. She noticed Ted glance back at Robin once before he left, and she saw Robin smile at him. Yeah, Ted still wasn't done going after Robin. She could tell from the look in his eyes. She turned back to the table and began to pay attention to the conversation again.

"Well, I better go write that paper," Marshall said, moving to stand. Lily stood too, and the two of them left the bar, leaving Barney and Cas there alone.

"I better go too," Cas said. "I have a job interview in the morning."

"Where at?" Barney asked, finishing off his beer as well.

"Columbia University. They have an opening for a school psychologist," she said. She wasn't sure if she would like working through the school, the pay was less than working at her own place, but she would take it if the job was offered.

"Nice, college girls," Barney said, smirking as he nodded. Cas rolled her eyes.

"I'm not hooking you up with college girls," she said, he sighed dramatically.

"Fine, how about that girl?" He asked, pointing over her shoulder to a blond at the bar.

"Okay fine, but I'm leaving after that," she said, finishing her own beer. "What's the play?"

"We can just do 'Have you met Barney?'. I didn't have a play for tonight," Barney said walking next to Cas. They stopped beside the girl and Cas tapped her shoulder.

"Hi, have you met Barney?" She asked, then turned and walked away, grabbing her jacket on the way out of the bar. She was smiling as she walked home. She had never had this many friends before. She really liked all of them, and they seemed to like her too. Her life was getting back on track now.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

"Hey guys," Cas said, slipping into the booth next to Lily and Robin. She had been running just a little behind all day. Not only had she nearly been late for work that morning, but she had forgotten to bring a lunch with her, so now it was just after five and she hadn't stopped to eat all day.

"Hey, how's your new job?" Lily asked as Barney and Ted got up to get the next round.

"It's good. It's still really busy, I'm not quite used to the routine yet," Cas said, sipping her beer.

"Don't worry, you've only been there for a week, it'll get better," Lily said, smiling.

"I know," Cas agreed, taking another sip of beer. She would have to eat something pretty soon, otherwise one glass of beer would make her way more tipsy than usual.

"Here you go," Ted said, putting the pitcher of beer on the table.

"We, are going on an adventure," Barney said to the table, putting a hand on Ted's shoulder. Ted shook his head, making to sit down. "No. Come on," he said, then looked at Marshall. "You coming?"

"Oh, I wish I could..," Marshall said, but gestured to Lily who was on the phone. "I think Lily and I are just goi-"

"I understand," Barney said, cutting him off. "Lets go," he said to Ted, dragging him toward the door.

"Why can Marshall say no?" Ted whined.

"Uhh... because he's getting laid," Barney said.

"Consistently," Marshall called after them. "And actually I really have to study, so I'm out too," he added to the girls as he stood to leave.

"Bye," Cas said, smiling. Lily lifted a hand and waved too, still on the phone. She hung up a moment later.

"What do you say to a girls night? Me, you, and Robin," Lily asked, scooting over on the bench so she wasn't as close to Cas.

"Sure, I'm not doing anything else tonight," Cas said, smiling. " Are we staying here of going out?"

"Here for now," Lily said. "Robin will meet us here in half an hour."

"I'm going to get some food, I'm super hungry," Cas said, glancing toward the bar. It wasn't too busy yet.

"Me too," Lily said, standing. "Oh, lets split nachos."

"I love nachos," Cas said, following her up to the bar.

They had nearly finished off the nachos when Robin arrived, still in her work clothes like Cas and Lily were.

"Hey," Robin said, coming over to sit with them.

"Hey," Cas and Lily both echoed.

"Want a beer?" Cas asked, gesturing to the half full pitcher of beer. Lily had consumed most of that as Cas was only on her second glass of it.

"I'm so glad we finally get to hang out just the three of us!" Lily said, smiling at the two girls.

"Yeah," Robin said, pouring herself a cup of beer.

"You sure you guys are okay giving up your Friday night to hang with an old almost-married lady?" Lily asked the two of them.

"Oh please, I'm so sick of the "meet-market" scene," Robin said, drinking over half her beer in one go. "Guys are like a subway. You miss one, another one comes along in five minutes." Cas laughed.

"Unless it's the end of the night, then you get on anything," Lily added, laughing.

"Heyow!" Robin added, laughing. "Lets get martinis," she said, finishing off her beer in record time. The three of them agreed and went up to the bar, and as they waited they turned to see that another group had stolen their booth. Lily and Cas looked at each other and shrugged, taking seats at the bar.

"Compliments of that guy," the bartender said, setting three martini's in front of them on the counter.

"Really? Sweet!" Lily said, reaching for hers.

"Oh, for you both it's six dollars," Carl the bartender said, gesturing to Cas and Lily. Cas laughed and dug out her wallet.

"I guess that's one drawback to being engaged," she said, paying Carl for her drink and turning to Robin. "I'm sure that's why he didn't-" she stopped as a guy came to stand between her and Robin, trying to flirt with her.

"Hey," he said to Robin, trying to act cool to hit on her.

"Oh. Oh, hello!," Lily said, stretching up to peek over the guys shoulder. Robin laughed and got rid of the guy quickly, then turned back to talk to them.

"So have you both always lived in New York?" Robin asked, leaning in to hear them.

"Oh, I grew up in Park Slope," Lily said, sipping her drink. Cas just nodded. Her parent's had lived in the suburbs, and she had moved to the city just after high school when her parents died. She hadn't ever felt the need to move away from the city.

"Oh, I love Park Slope," Robin said, smiling. "When did you move to Manhattan?"

"You're from Park Slope?" A guy asked, leaning on the counter between Robin and Lily again, hitting on Robin.

"Uh, no she is," Robin said, pointing to Lily while trying to smile to be polite. Cas covered her mouth to keep from laughing.

"So where're you from?" The guy continued, ignoring her first comment. "Heaven?"

"Yeah," Robin said, rolling her eyes. "I'm a ghost! Died fifteen years ago, like that pickup line."

"Heyow," Lily added as the guy walked away. They all laughed, turning back to the bar.

"God, I'm so sorry you guys," Robin said, rubbing her forehead as though she was getting a headache.

"It's fine," Cas said, laughing.

"Oh, believe me I've been there," Lily said, leaning in to talk. "I have this line that I use when guys come," she said, spotting a guy coming up to them. "Check it out." She turned to talk to the guy who looked like he was coming up to her but at the last second he turned to face Robin.

"Hey," he said, nodding to her.

"You take this one, I'll save it for the next one," Lily grumbled and took a large gulp of her martini. Robin quickly got the guy to leave just as Lily stepped towards the door to answer her phone.

"You're going to Philly? Why?" She asked, frowning as she talked. "Well it sounds like you're having a lot more fun than I am. I'm just talking to guys' backs while they hit on Robin," Lily said, giving a fake laugh. "Don't you bet I get that a lot?" She asked, frowning. Cas could see a pout forming on her face. "Oh, of course, that's it the ring! I guess I'm not used to it yet," Lily said, lifting her left hand to look at the ring there. Cas smiled when she saw Lily's little involuntary smile as she looked down at it. "I'm not going to take off my ring!" Lily said, dropping her hand again. "Wouldn't you be jealous of guys swarming all over my beeswax?" Cas laughed at her phrasing. "Bye," she said a moment later. Robin had left to use the restroom at the beginning of Lily's call, leaving Cas to watch the drinks. As Lily sat down again, Cas saw her tuck her ring into the pocket of her sweater and laughed to herself.

"Robin! Robin," Lily called, seeing Robin coming back from the bathroom. Lily waved her left hand in the air, looking ridiculous. "Hey, we're over here."

"It's ridiculous in here, why don't we go somewhere else?" Robin asked, making her way through the crowd toward them.

"No, this place is great," Lily said, unbuttoning her sweater to show of her lower cut shirt, then leaning forward and posing her lips into a ridiculous looking kiss position.

"What are you doing?" Robin asked as Cas tried to hide her laughter.

"What?" Lily asked through her smushed together lips.

"With your lips and everything…?" Robin sat back down at the bar and glanced at Cas in question. Cas just shook her head.

"My lips are always like this," Lily said, trying to take a sip of her martini. She jumped back as she spilled a little of it on her shirt. Cas laughed again, Robin joining in this time.

"Ooh, look a booth opened up," Robin said, pointing to the back of the bar as she stood with her drink.

"Really?" Lily asked, not really paying attention. Cas stood too, grabbing her drink to follow Robin.

"Yeah, I thought we could finally go talk, and you're not listening to me, so I'm going to walk away," Robin said, noticing Lily staring at an attractive guy across the bar.

"Yeah, yeah…booth," Lily said, tossing her purse in Robin's direction. Cas caught it before it hit the floor. Cas and Robin headed toward the booth and sat as the guy approached Lily. They couldn't hear what they were saying from the booth, but both of them watched for a moment.

"So how's work going?" Cas asked, turning the attention away from Lily.

"It's okay… I still haven't had any real work, just those stupid little fluff pieces," Robin said, shrugging.

"You'll get something interesting soon. If you want, I can go do something stupid that's news worthy. Like… climbing all the way to the top of the Brooklyn Bridge or something," Cas offered. Robin laughed and shrugged.

"I'll let you know when we start running out of animals playing instruments," she said, finishing off her drink. Lily's phone began to ring a moment later, and Robin picked it up.

"Lily's phone," she said, then listened for a moment. She glanced up at Cas, eyes wide. "She's uh…" she trailed off as the other person, who Cas guessed to be Marshall, spoke. "Really?" Robin said, letting out a sigh of relief. "Well I thought it was kinda weird, but if you're cool with it. Yeah. It's off and she's talking to some guy. Do you want me to go over and-" she was cut off by something Marshall said. Robin snapped the phone shut a few seconds later. "Well, I guess that was Marshall's idea," Robin said, gesturing to the bar where the guy Lily was talking to walked away. "I need another drink," Robin said, standing and making her way toward Lily. Cas sat back in her seat, watching them talking for a few moments before letting her gaze go around the bar. Lily's way of thinking was so weird sometimes. Cas thought it was funny. Maybe working with kindergartners rubbed off on Lily a little, at least in the not wanting to share department. Cas watched as the guy came back in with a cup of something and Lily turned around to expose a little stain on her skirt which the guy was trying to get off. She saw Marshall walking in and got up to go over to the others, just in time to see Marshall push the guy away from Lily.

"You wanna mess pal? That's my fiancee's hot backside that you're dabbing," Marshall said loudly, looking at the guy.

"Marshall, no," Lily tried to pull him back.

"Baby, please don't ever take that ring off again. No matter how awesome I say that it is," Marshall said, turning to Lily for a second before gong back to the 'fight' that was unfolding.

"It's okay, man…" the other guy tried to say, holding up his hands in a peaceful gesture.

"BACK OFF HOMBRE!" Marshall yelled. "I'm not that afraid to fight you. You wanna test this guy? Be my guest!" Cas nearly laughed at how scared Marshall actually looked.

"Marshall, he's gay!" Lily said.

"Oh, thank god... I've never been in a fight before," Marshall said, stepping forward to hug the guy.

"You don't say," the other guy said sarcastically. Half a second later, another guy ripped Marshall away from the first guy and punched him in the face.

"Hey!" Lily protested, going back to see if Marshall was alright. Cas turned to Robin.

"Soooo, interesting night," Cas said, making Robin laugh.

"Do you want to go out for coffee and cheesecake with Lily and I?" Robin asked as Marshall, now sporting a black eye, stood and the others around him clarified the situation for the gay guys boyfriend. The four of them left the bar a few minutes later. Lily went upstairs with Marshall, making sure he was alright before she joined them on the street as they walked toward a cafe nearby.

Two hours later, they were back in the bar, this time with Barney as Ted hit on a girl at the bar and Barney told them about their impromptu trip to Philadelphia. Cas listened to the story, shaking her head at how stupid Barney could be sometimes.

"…and then Dana let us in. And we licked it," Barney finished.

"Did you really?" Cas asked, shaking her head.

"We did! It tastes like pennies," he said, laughing with the others. Cas finished off her beer and stood.

"I'm gonna get going," she said, smiling at them.

"Bye!" the table called, almost at the same time. Cas smiled and left the bar, feeling a little more drunk than she usually let herself get. Maybe she would be able to fall asleep faster tonight. Alcohol usually helped her with that.

* * *

The next morning she was awaked by her door buzzing. She groaned and sat up, peeking out the window to see who it was. Barney was standing on the steps, pushing the door button again and again. She sighed, then stood to let him in.

"I hate you," she said, flopping onto the couch as he opened her door. "It's Saturday, why can't I sleep in?"

"Can you come back to the hospital with me please?" Barney asked, ignoring her as he paced around the room. She sat up and looked at him.

"Is your mom…" She trailed off, not sure what she was asking.

"The doctor called this morning and said he wants me to come in," he replied, not looking at her.

"Oh," she said, realizing that he wanted her there because he didn't want to go alone, not because he wanted to pretend she was his fiancee to make his mom happy. "Sure, give me ten minutes." He nodded and sat on the couch as she jumped up to find clothes, then rushed to the bathroom to change. She did her hair the same way she had last time, threw on some makeup, and grabbed her purse, remembering the small ring box in her desk drawer at the last moment and throwing it into her purse too just in case. Barney didn't speak at all as she hailed a cab and directed him to the hospital.

"Are you alright?" She asked as the cab pulled away from them, leaving them in front of the hospital. He didn't answer her, just walked forward. She grabbed his hand again as they walked, and this time he held on tightly. She frowned. It must be bad news if he was that worried. She had never seen him this worried before, not even the last time they were here. He had always seemed like he didn't have normal emotions, but now she realized that he just tried very hard to keep them hidden. They walked through the hospital in silence, stopping outside the door that read 'Loretta Stinson' for a second before Cas pushed the door open. There was another guy in there that she didn't know, and a doctor. She was surprised to see that Barney's mom was sitting up in the bed, smiling at them. Barney dropped her hand and went to sit by his mom. Cas smiled, watching them, and stood back so the doctor could talk. Her smile widened as she understood what he was saying. Barney's mom would be fine, she could leave the hospital in a few days and go home. Cas, realizing that Loretta still thought they were engaged, excused herself to use the restroom so she could get the ring from her purse, planning on returning it after their hospital visit. She wasn't sure what Barney would do now, but she assumed it would be something elaborate and stupid.

As she entered the hospital room again a few minutes later, she heard Loretta asking about her, or rather, 'Betty'.

"There she is," Barney said, resting a hand on her lower back to guide her over to the bed as Cas entered the room.

"Betty, I'm so glad I get to stay around for the birth of my first grandchild," Loretta said, pulling Cas closer to her so she could rest a hand on Cas's stomach.

"Me too," she said, smiling sweetly while throwing a glare over her shoulder at Barney.

"I'm sure we will get to know each other really well," Loretta said. Cas just nodded, noticing that the woman was already falling asleep.

Barney and Cas said their farewells, then left the room, followed by the black guy who had been in there the whole time.

"Cas, this is my brother James, James, this is Cas," Barney said when the three of them had reached the lobby.

"Cas?" James asked, grinning. "So you aren't actually getting married right?" James asked, a half smile on his face. Cas laughed and shook her head.

"It was Barney's idea," Cas said, shaking the hand he held out for her.

"Of course it was," he said, rolling his eyes. Cas laughed again, noticing the similar personalities the brothers shared.

"It was a good idea!" Barney protested, frowning.

"Please tell me we don't actually have to get married and adopt a child…" Cas said, shaking her head.

"Of course not," he said, frowning again. "We just have to pretend to." Cas stared at him for a minute.

"What?" She asked, watching him think it through.

"We can pretend to get married, and just babysit for someone. We only have to go have dinner with her like, once a month, it'll be easy," he said, and Cas shook her head again, not protesting, just unbelieving of how eccentric Barney could be. "Yeah, you're right, I can hire an actor to do it, then you don't have to. I'll just find someone with blonde hair, mom won't even notice!" Cas glanced at James, wondering what he thought of all this.

"Try the improv group at the theater downtown, they always have people there who are looking for money," James said, walking next to Barney as they headed toward the road. Cas followed behind, wondering if the two boys were so over dramatic because their mother was, or if they had picked it up from someone else. She was silent as Barney hailed a cab back to her apartment.

He followed her inside, even though it was only about nine by that point. He plopped down on the couch and turned on the tv.

"Don't you have your own apartment?" Cas asked as she kicked off her shoes and shut the door behind him.

"But yours is so much closer," Barney wined.

"Well I want to go back to sleep. I was up late last night," she said, a hand on one hip as she watched him watch tv.

"You can sleep, I'll turn the volume down," he said, not looking her way. She sighed, then shook her head and walked to the other side of the room. "Oh, here, I forgot," she said, spotting the things she had left on her bedside table. She tossed him a key as he turned to look at her. He caught it, then raised an eyebrow. "I hate the door buzzer. It's so much easier if you have a key. That one opens the outside and inside door. Please please do not bring women here to have sex with when I'm gone. Use Ted's apartment for that," she said, grinning. He laughed and tucked the key into his pocket.

"Fine, I won't," he said. "Often," he added in an undertone.

"No, not at all," she called, grabbing the pajama shorts and tank top she usually slept in off her bed where she had tossed them this morning and heading to the bathroom to change.

"Okay fine," he said in a fake angry voice. She ignored him and changed, then went back to her bed and snuggled up under the blankets. She had thought the sound of the tv would keep her awake, but it was oddly soothing, and she was asleep almost immediately.

Cas was woken a couple hours later by someone shaking her shoulder. She opened her eyes and blinked a few times, trying to let her eyes adjust to the light in the room. She didn't feel any more rested then she had when she had woken up earlier.

"What?" She asked, realizing that the person was still shaking her. She blinked again and Barney came into focus, one eyebrow raised. Why was he here again? She couldn't remember. She flopped back onto her pillow and pulled her blanked up over her head. "I'm tired," she muttered, her voice muffled.

"Well I'm tired of listening to your nightmares," Barney replied. She was still for a moment, then pulled the blanket down to her chin to look at him.

"What?" She asked, though she was pretty sure she knew what. She'd always had a habit of talking in her sleep, she had forgotten that until just now, not having slept near anyone in quite a while. She couldn't recall what nightmare she had been having this time, but she knew he wasn't lying. That's why she was still tired, even though, judging by the sun coming in her window, it was after eleven now.

"I said-" he began, but she cut him off.

"I know, never mind. You can just leave you know," she said, closing her eyes and turning away from him to curl up facing the wall.

"But then I'd have to find a cab, and all that. Plus I don't have any other plans for today," Barney said, poking her shoulder to make sure she wasn't going back to sleep. She groaned and ignored him, keeping her eyes shut. "Lets go to the bar," he said, still poking her.

"It's ten in the morning," she grumbled.

"No, it's 11:30," he said, as though that made getting drunk more inviting. She didn't reply. "Let's go to my place." She peeked one eye open and raised an eyebrow.

"You could be a little more creative with the pick up lines you know," she said. She had been to his apartment once, a few weeks ago. It was much bigger than hers, and its style fit him, she supposed. But it was too neat there for her to feel comfortable in. She liked her little apartment. It was homey.

"Come on, get up," he said, and she could hear the frown in his voice. She smiled. "I need something to do."

"Again, you could be a little more creative with the pick up lines," she said, closing her eyes again.

"Please," he said in an offended voice. "If I was trying to get you into bed I would definitely use a better line," he said. "Oh wait, I already have you in bed, right now." She sat up, rolling her eyes.

"Uh huh. Like you could ever get this," she said sarcastically, waving a hand at herself like she was the hottest thing in New York, in her pajamas with her makeup probably smeared. "I'm way out of your league."

"Psh," he said, backing away from the bed so she could stand up. "I could get you in bed like this," he snapped his fingers. She raised an eyebrow, then shook her head. She grabbed her clothes and held them in her arms, then turned back to him.

"You couldn't. I have standards," she said, grinning. He rose his eyebrows.

"Challenge Accep-" he began, but she cut him off.

"Nope," she said, shaking her head. "That right there is why it would never happen." She stepped around him and went towards the bathroom to change into real clothes and fix her makeup and hair. She stared at herself in the mirror for a few moments, taking in the bags under her wide blue eyes that were still visible through the concealer she had on. Her eyelids felt heavy, like it was hard to keep them open. She hadn't been sleeping enough recently. Her skin looked pale, but that was normal, she had never been tan. Her blond hair looked thin and dry to her, though she knew there wasn't really much of a change to it, just the way she looked at it. She took out the bun she had put it in to sleep in and redid it, making sure none of the strands were falling out this time. She sighed, glad the heavier shirt did a better job of hiding her frame than the thin pajamas. She had lost weight recently. Not on purpose, she just wasn't ever hungry anymore. Soon she wouldn't have anymore weight to lose without looking sick. She had to start sleeping better, that's what all this stemmed from. Her lack of sleep. Maybe she should invest in some cough syrup That always guaranteed a heavy sleep. She sighed and gave herself one last going over, then turned to leave the bathroom only to see Barney standing in the open door frame. She frowned.

"Are you trying to watch me change?" She asked, pushing past him. He grabbed her arm and turned her around.

"Are you alright?" He asked, not dropping her arm. He had an eyebrow raised, making it look like he was just asking for the sake of asking, but his eyes were serious as he watched her.

"I'm-" she began, but stopped talking as he raised his free hand to her cheek and ran his thumb over the dark circle under her eye. Her breath caught without her meaning it to and she lost her train of thought as she stared up at him. In her professional opinion of what she knew of Barney's personality, he was the type of person to put up walls and not show his feelings and wear a mask around people. She expected him to be the kind of person who runs away from sincerity and things he cares about. But his eyes looked concerned to her. And the tone of his voice when he asked sounded like he actually was worried. She had always been a good judge of people before this, she had always been able to read them like a book, even the ones she didn't know, but this was different. She was doubting herself now. This was all unexpected, and she didn't know what to do. He took a half step closer to her. Their bodies were almost touching now and one of his hands ran up her arm, the other one slid down to the base of her neck. What was going on? She couldn't seem to catch her breath.

She had never been the kind of girl who fell for the stupid pick up lines before, or the kind who was a sappy romantic. She had never mooned over someone she was crushing on. She had never cried herself to sleep over a guy. And she had definitely never bought into that stupid sappy love crap. So why was she letting this get to her now?

He was leaning closer to her, and her eyes half closed as her face tilted up without her consent. Her heart was racing. He was still leaning closer. The hand on her arm slid up to the back of her neck. Now she was breathing too hard. She could hear her pulse pumping in her ears. Her eyes drifted closed when his lips were a millimeter from hers. She could feel his warm breath on her face as he tilted her head back with his hand. His other hand had dropped to wrap around her waist, coming to a rest on her lower back. He pulled her closer. Their bodies were touching now, and her hands found their way up his neck, one going into his hair without her realizing she had moved.

He didn't kiss her, his cheek brushed hers as he leaned down to whisper into her ear.

"Challenge completed," he said, his lips brushing over the curve of ear. Her eyes flew open and she took a step back out of his reach, her mind coming back into focus as her breathing returned to normal. Her heart was still racing, but he didn't need to know that. She raised an eyebrow and tried to act nonchalant, like she hadn't just been about to let him kiss her.

"I don't know where you learned about the birds and the bees, but that was not sex," she said, and was proud of herself when her voice came out even and strong without cracking. She resisted the urge to lift her hand to her heart and feel how fast it was beating. He rolled his eyes and gave her a smirk.

"Please," he said, the picture of smugness. "I could have gotten you into bed within the next five minutes and you know it," he said, but he wasn't looking at her, he was looking just over her shoulder. He was right, he could have. But he didn't. And she wasn't sure if she was glad about that or not.

"Uh huh, sure," she said, shrugging noncommittally. Her heart rate was returning to normal now too, and she was a little angry at herself for falling for that. It had just been a really long time since she'd had a boyfriend, or even a one night stand. She wasn't used to the physical contact anymore, and that had always been something she liked. She was sure that's why she had reacted the way she had.

"Admit it," he said, looking at her now. He smirked.

"Nope, you might be a pathological liar, but I'm not," she said, smirking back. He laughed, but she had a feeling that he wasn't going to let that 'Challenge' drop. She wished he would. She didn't want to have feelings toward him, which she was sure she would eventually if he did things like this often enough. He raised an eyebrow at her.

"Well?" He asked and she looked at him, returning his eyebrow raise.

"What?" She asked when he didn't elaborate.

"Well, what are we going to do today?" He asked. She laughed and shook her head, then went to put on her shoes.

"Lets go to Marshall and Ted's, they always have something to do," she said, opening her apartment door for him to leave. She locked it behind him.

It wasn't until later that night when the six of them were at the bar and she was sipping on her beer, half listening to the conversation, half thinking, that she realized that when her hand had been on his neck, his heart had been beating just as hard as hers had been. She glanced at him and shook her head. That must have been excitement for possible sex, not feelings of anything toward her, because there he was, chatting up some girl at the bar, scotch glass in one hand as he talked. No, she had to have been mistaken. Barney was not the type of person to have feelings for girls, even though she was sure that his sleeping around was just a way to keep himself busy. She turned back to the conversation Marshall and Lily were having about some sort of wedding plans and shook her head at herself.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Barney had been spending a lot of time in her apartment the last week. He said it was because he was bored at his apartment, but Cas thought it was because he didn't want to be alone. He stayed there sometimes when she went to work, and she would come home to find him watching some sports game or show on the tv. She didn't care, it was nice to not come home to an empty place. She had relaxed around him over the past week when he didn't try anything like the stupid almost kiss again. Maybe he had dropped it. She hoped so.

"Friendship over!" Barney was yelling at Ted when she walked into the bar. She had been running late today for their usual nightly bar visit. She had seven appointments tomorrow for work, which was almost twice as many as usual, so she had been going over the files she had for each person so she could refresh herself on them. She had made notes of things to suggest as well. And now, she wanted to relax and have a beer. Barney passed her as he stormed out of the bar. She took his spot in the chair at the end of the table.

"What's his problem?" She asked, pouring herself a beer from the pitcher.

"He's mad because Ted dated this one girl a while back who was a porn star, and Ted dumped her," Lily explained, laughing. Cas smiled.

"Of course he is," she said, shaking her head.

"But no, really guys, I'm going to call her," Ted said. Obviously Cas had arrived in the middle of a conversation. She sipped her beer.

"Don't call her," Marshall said.

"I'm gonna call her," Ted replied, pulling out his phone and looking through his contacts.

"The porn star?" Cas stage whispered to Robin.

"No, some chick named Natalie," Robin replied, trying not to laugh.

"I wonder if she remembers me," Ted said, lifting the phone to his ear. They all leaned in to try to hear the conversation. "Uh, hi, Natalie? It's Ted Mosby," he said and paused. They could all hear her yell into the phone. A second later Ted put the phone down. "Yeah, she remembers me."

The group laughed and Cas downed half her beer.

"What did you do that was so bad?" Lily asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Well…" Ted launched into the story of dumping her. On her birthday. On the answering machine. Lily hit him while Robin and Cas laughed. She had finished her first beer and was going to have another, but the pitcher was empty now. She frowned, then shrugged and picked up Barney's scotch glass that was still mostly full. She took a sip, grimaced as it burned her throat, and took another. She couldn't remember if she had ever had scotch before. It was alright, she supposed.

"I'm going to bed," Lily said less than ten minutes later. "I have a kindergarten class to teach in the morning." Marshall stood to leave with her, of course. Those two were like the same person. It was weird sometimes. Cas turned to Robin.

"Did Barney really pay you a hundred bucks to say nipple on television?" She asked. Robin rolled her eyes.

"I can't believe I did that. It was so unprofessional," Robin said, but she was half smiling. Cas shook her head, smiling too. Ted began to discuss some band or another with Robin, and Cas stood and yawned.

"I'm going home too, I have to go into work early tomorrow," she said.

"Bye," Robin said, waving. Cas waved back, then turned to leave and nearly lost her balance. Maybe the scotch was a bad idea. She hadn't eaten much that day, and now she was feeling really light headed. She made it to the street and the cool air helped her to clear her mind a bit. She somehow managed to unlock her door and stumble into her apartment.

"Are you drunk?" Barney asked from where he was sitting on the couch. She groaned. Of course he hadn't gone home. And of course he had to be here when she was more drunk than usual.

"No," she mumbled, stripping off her coat to hand by the door and trying to kick her shoes off at the same time. He caught her as she stumbled and chuckled.

"Sure you aren't," he said. She closed her eyes and tried to focus. She stood away from him.

"I'm not," she said, her voice steady this time. "I'm just a little more tipsy than usual. I finished your scotch. It was actually pretty good," she said, then followed him to the couch and plopped down. She had left her notes from her sessions on the coffee table, but that wasn't what was open. Barney had found one of her old photo albums from high school and had been looking through it. She grinned.

"That's from junior year, that was the best year," she said, looking down at the photos of her when she was younger and had friends. He picked the album back up and turned the page. Her smile dropped a little. She tucked her feet up under her and leaned closer to him to look at the pictures. She ran her fingers over the smiling blonde girl in the pictures next to her. Both of them grinning widely and sledding, or skiing, or sitting in the tree fort in her parents back yard, or dressed up for a school dance.

"Who's that?" Barney asked, flipping the page.

"My sister," she replied, flipping the next page for him.

"She's hot," Barney said suggestively.

"She's dead," she replied casually. He shut up for a minute and flipped to another page, then closed the album.

"I'm… uh, sorry," he said. She snorted.

"No you aren't, you're never sorry," she said, trying to stand up. Her head spun and she sat down again.

"And you're never drunk," he said, forming the words into a question.

"I didn't think scotch was that strong," she said, closing her eyes and leaning her head back. "And I'm really tired."

"Scotch isn't that strong," Barney said, frowning. "Did you eat today?"

"Yes, mother," she said dryly, then she frowned. "I ate a bagel for breakfast."

"Is that it?" He asked, frowning.

"Maybe," she said. He stood and went into the kitchen, returning with a glass of water which he handed to her when she opened her eyes. "I'm fine, stop parenting me." But she took a sip of the water anyway, then drank the rest of it quickly as it cleared her head a little. She leaned forward to set the glass on the coffee table, then curled up against the arm of the couch. She heard Barney sigh, but her eyelids were too heavy to open. He was saying something, but she was already asleep.

He sighed and looked down at her. Her hair was coming out of the braid she had worn that day and falling around her face in little curls. Her eyeliner was smudged a little. He spoke her name once, then again, but her eyes stayed closed and her breathing slowed. He hesitated for a moment, then bent over and slid an arm under her knees and another behind her shoulders, then lifted her up. She was lighter than he had expected. Much lighter. He carried her to her bed and somehow managed to pull the blankets back with one hand. He lowered her gently, letting her head fall onto the pillow, then he straightened her legs and pulled the blanket up over her. She stirred, and he froze, not wanting her to wake up, but she just turned toward the wall and curled up, her knees brought up to her chest, her arms tucked in. He smiled, then shook his head and turned around to leave, shutting off lights as he went and making sure to lock the door behind him.

Cas only stirred once as the door closed, but she didn't wake up.

* * *

Cas groaned when she woke the next morning to the door buzzer going off. Had Barney forgotten his key? And it had to be Barney, because no one else ever came here. She squinted out of the window blinds, then frowned. That was definitely not Barney.

She got up quickly, nearly tripping to rush to the buzzer.

"Yes?" She asked through the intercom.

"I'm sorry to bother you," the other person said. "I just moved in upstairs and I locked myself out. Can you please buzz me in?" She sighed, then pushed the door button. "Thanks," the person said, then the intercom went silent. She frowned and went back to her bed to check her phone. She was lucky that person had woken her up, she only had an hour until she had to be at work and she had forgotten to set an alarm. It would have been a bad impression to be late to work the first month. She showered, dressed, and was halfway out the door before she began to wonder why she had slept in her clothes the night before. She shrugged it off as she hit the road and hailed a cab.

That evening she came home to Barney sitting on her couch, watching tv.

"Why are you always here?" She asked tiredly as she closed the door behind her.

"Shh, Robin's on next. Come watch," he said, patting the couch next to him without looking up. She kicked off her shoes and dropped her bag of student files next to the door and shed her coat, then went into the kitchen. She was cold, she had been cold all day even though there wasn't yet snow on the ground and it wasn't actually that cold outside. She put a kettle on to boil water and found a coffee mug and a tea bag.

Five minutes later she was sitting on the couch, her hands wrapped around the hot mug, watching Robin reporting about a pair of really old twins who had both passed away right before their 100th birthday party. Barney turned the volume up as the report ended, watching the screen expectantly.

"I'm a dirty dirty girl," Robin said straight faced into the camera, then she slapped her ass and said "ow." Cas's mouth dropped open as she stared at the screen, then she burst into laughter.

"Please tell me you recorded that," she said through her giggles.

"I did. I have the nipple one too, and I have a really good plan for the next show. Let's go to the bar and find Robin," he said, standing.

"That's a live interview," Cas said rolling her eyes and taking a sip of her still scalding hot tea. "She won't be at the bar for another hour at least, and I have work to do.

"Fine," he huffed, sitting back down on the couch. Cas set her tea down at the table and retrieved her work bag, pulling out the files of the clients who had appointments tomorrow. There were two other school psychologists at Columbia but they were both older men, and a lot of her female students had said they felt uncomfortable talking to them, and some of the male ones had too, so they made a point to request her. She figured it was a good thing that they seemed to like her, she was getting more and more new clients. She liked to think that she was different from other psychologists, because she didn't just let the patient talk to her, she talked back to them. She shared her opinions and experiences so they could identify with her and they would feel more comfortable with her, like they were talking to a friend, not an aloof stranger. She also preferred the non drug methods of fixing problems. She was able to prescribe medication if she thought it was needed, but she hardly ever did. She wanted them to try things like meditation or keeping a journal first, because often times, those things worked if the person wanted them to. She jotted down meditation on one of the files she had for tomorrow. She wasn't sure the young man would give it a try, but he had severe anger issues at times, and she thought that maybe if she could get him to try it, it would help. She frowned, trying to think of a way to introduce the idea in an appealing way.

"Alright, enough of that focusing crap," Barney said, drawing her out of her thoughts. "Go change and we'll go to the bar."

"I said an hour Barney," she said, still reading her notes over.

"And it's been an hour and a half, lets go," he said, standing impatiently. She looked up at the clock, then back at him and made a face as though asking if she had to go with. He looked at her expectantly and she groaned and stood to go change.

She only stuck around the bar long enough for Barney to get distracted, then she muttered excuses to the others and went home to finish going over her notes for the next day. At least tomorrow was Friday and she could relax after work.

* * *

"You have to come to the bar," Barney said as soon as she answered her phone the next evening.

"Maybe later," she said. She had literally just walked in the door from work, she wanted to relax a little first.

"No, now. You have to watch Robin on tv," he said excitedly.

"I'll watch it here," she said, though she had no plans of doing so. She really just wanted to sleep.

"Ug, fine," he said, and hung up the phone. She frowned and tossed it onto the couch, her coat going over it and her shoes next. She stripped off her clothes in her living room, though she had been trying not to do that lately. She hadn't realized how much Barney having a key and with it, the ability to show up whenever he wanted, would affect the way she did things until he had almost walked in on her changing. At least that time she had been behind the screen of her makeshift bedroom and he hadn't seen anything.

She pulled on some jeans and a t-shirt and sat on the edge of her bed, wondering what to do. She really didn't want to keep working, it was already six. She glanced around her little bedroom, her eyes falling onto the calendar hung up behind her bedside table. It was a 'sights of New York' themed one, and this month was the empire state building. She frowned. She hadn't been back to it since the almost jump. Maybe she could go today. The city was pretty nice to look at during the day and she hadn't been anywhere besides work, home, and the bar in over a month. She made up her mind and stood, grabbed her coat, and left the apartment.

There was a line for the elevator, of course, but she waited patiently, not wanting to take the stairs today. She made it to the front of the line in under half an hour and took the elevator up, then followed the crowd of people down the hall to the observation deck. She was glad she had brought her coat this time, it was very cold up this high today. She shoved her hands into her coat pockets after pulling the hood against her neck, and found an empty space near the safety wall to lean and look out. If she ignored the constant talking of the people around her and the lights of cameras, it was actually very peaceful. She let out a breath, trying to forget about how stressed she had become from work the last few weeks, and just admired the view. The city was crawling with people, as it always was during the day, and far far below her, she could see the cars passing, like a line of ants. She smiled and watched the clouds moving across the sky until the sun began to set behind them, then she watched the colors change.

"What the hell are you doing?" a voice broke through her peacefulness. She turned, frowning, to see Barney, scowling in anger she had never seen from him before.

"What?" She asked, ignoring the curious looks of the tourists nearby. He stormed closer and gripped her arm tightly, leaning in so the others could hear him.

"I asked what the hell you are doing?" He repeated, not loosening his grip, though he didn't try to drag her towards the door like she thought he would.

"Admiring the view?" She asked in a small voice, her tone turning the answer into a question. She didn't like angry people, especially when they were angry at her and she didn't know what she had done.

"Admiring the-" he stopped and shook his head. "Please tell me you weren't up here to jump," he said quietly, closing his eyes and rubbing his forehead with his free hand. She stared at him, mouth agape until he opened his eyes again.

"Of course I wasn't. I told you I wouldn't," she said softly. She twisted her arm out of his bruising grip.

"Then why didn't you take your phone?" He asked, still angrily, but his face was relaxing. She frowned and patted her pockets.

"I must have forgotten it. I didn't even notice," she said. He reached a hand into his coat pocket and held her phone out to her.

"You left it on your couch," he said. She took it silently and tucked it into her pocket. She looked up and watched his face, confused as to why he had reacted that way. He stared back at her, still frowning, and she realized what it was.

"Don't tell me you were worried about me," she said in a joking tone, trying not to let the seriousness of the situation seep in too much.

"Of course I was worried," he said, not joking in the least. "I- you- you're one of my best friends," he said, and she was surprised to hear his voice shake a little. She hadn't realized it until then, but he actually really cared. Not just about her, but about all of them. Now that she realized it, it became glaringly obvious in the little things he did for all of them. She hugged him tightly, throwing her arms around his shoulders. His arms reflexively went around her waist as she pressed her face into his chest.

"I'm sorry for scaring you," she said, stepping back from the hug.

"Don't go putting words in my mouth. I could care less if-" he began, his voice joking again.

"Yeah yeah, don't worry," she said, grinning. "I won't tell anyone that you actually have emotions like a normal human being. Your secret is safe with me." He huffed, and turned back to the view of the city for a moment.

"Okay, enough of this crap, lets get drunk," he said, grabbing her arm to tug her away from the platform. She laughed and followed him all the way down to the street, then split a cab back to the bar. "Did you see Robin tonight?" he asked, his eyes lighting up in mischief.

"No, what did you make her say?" Cas asked, watching the city roll by the car windows.

"She didn't say it," he said, grinning. She turned to look at him, eyebrow raised in question as the cab pulled up to the curb in front of the bar. "Oh no, this was so much better," he said, pulling out his wallet to pay the driver, then getting out to stand on the curb. He pulled his phone out and messed round for a minute then held it in front of her face, the volume all the way up. By the end she was laughing so hard he had to pull her into the bar.

"You got her," Lily comment as the slid into the booth. "What took you so damn long?" Cas glanced at him in confusion.

"We had to watch today's news of course," he said, grinning at Robin. Robin rolled her eyes and told him to shut up as the bartender brought a drink over for her, compliments of two guys at the bar who had watched her show. Ted came in a minute later, his eye blackened and a bruise spreading over his cheek. Cas scooted in on the bench to make room for him, and frowned as tingles raced up her leg where she touched Barney. She didn't glance at him, just turned to listen to Ted talk about his horrible breakup with Natalie.

She was distracted through the next two rounds, trying very hard not to think about Barney. What was this? She wasn't some stupid teenage girl who got crushes on people just because they showed her affection once and freaked out when they accidentally came into contact. She shook her head, doing her best to keep a little space between her and Barney which was hard to do in the limited space. Eventually she gave up and pleaded tiredness to go home, giving the group a smile as she left. She let out a breath as the cool air hit her face outside, and shook her head. What was wrong with her? That thought repeated in her head until she was curled up in bed under her warm blankets, ready to sleep. It took a while, but sleep did come eventually.

* * *

She successfully avoided Barney for the rest of the week by claiming to have a cold. She also had to avoid the rest of the group to make that story plausible. The next Friday night found her upside down on her couch, her head near the floor, her feet over the back of the couch, in shorts and a tank top, reading a book she had been really into all week. The tv was on, but she had muted it earlier, and her laptop was open on her bed playing through a playlist of songs she enjoyed. She didn't even hear the door open and close, she was so invested in her book. She didn't look up to see Barney's eyes run along her legs and up her stomach and breasts to her face. She also didn't notice that he had brought Robin with him until the other woman yanked the book from her hands. Cas yelped and slid sideways so that she was half laying on the couch, then fell to the floor with a soft thud. She sat up, frowning at them.

"What do you want, I was reading," she said.

"We noticed," Robin said as Barney cleared his throat. Cas stood and went to close her laptop, cutting off the quiet music.

"Well?" She asked, coming back to find them in the same place.

"I like your apartment," Robin said, looking around her.

"We are going to a club," Barney said at the same time. Cas sighed. "And you have to wear whatever Robin tells you to wear." Robin nodded in agreement.

"And I can't get you to just leave?" Cas asked, sighing.

"Nope," Robin said, smiling, then she turned to Barney. "Go away," she said. He huffed, but left the apartment.

"Can you please just say I was sick or something?" Cas begged when she heard the outside door shut too. Robin gave her a look, and she sighed in resignation. "I don't own any clothes to wear out to a club."

"That's fine, I brought some of Lily's," Robin said, holding up a bag. Cas sighed again, then took the bag and retreated behind her screen divider as Robin settled into the couch.

"Why do I have to go to a club?" Cas asked, stripping off her clothes. "And do I actually have to wear this bra?" She asked, frowning at the push up bra.

"Yes you do," Robin said smugly. "And I met the owner of OKAY and he is getting us in." Cas frowned. She knew what OKAY was of course, some of the college kids who came to her for therapy sessions had begun talking about it a month ago.

Cas finished dressing in silence, pulling the too short skirt on and the much too tight shirt on before stepping out into the living room.

"I look like a slut," she said, looking down at herself.

"No, but you will after we do your hair and makeup," Robin said, grinning. Cas frowned at her, but felt better when she noticed that Robin was wearing clothes that were just as slutty. She let Robin subject her hair and face to torture for half an hour, then protested when Robin tried making her look in the mirror. She lost that fight as well, and froze when she caught sight of herself She frowned.

"What's wrong? Don't you like it?" Robin asked from behind her.

"I look… hot," Cas said, looking at herself in the mirror. The circles under her eyes were gone, her legs looked long and thin, her breasts were pushed up nicely by the bra.

"Of course you do," Robin said, rolling her eyes. "The raw material is what counts and it's all there. Now lets go."

"Fine," Cas said, emptying the things she would need from her purse into her coat pocket before following Robin out to get a cab. Cas couldn't remember the last time she had put this much effort into looking nice, whether it was her effort or someone else's. She grew excited as the cab dropped them off on the curb in front of the club and Robin led them to the front. Maybe finding some random guy to hook up with was just what she needed. She could hear the loud music as soon as they stepped in the doors. Robin made them wait near the doors, looking out every time it opened to see if Barney and Ted were there yet. Cas turned off her phone and checked in her coat while she waited, feeling exposed in the short sleeved shirt and tiny skirt.

"I'm gonna go in," she said to Robin, raising her voice to be heard over the music. "Find me before you go okay?" Robin nodded and Cas turned to go up the stairs to the dance floor where the music was loud enough to drown out everything else. It had been years since she had gone dancing, and she hadn't realized how much she had missed it until just then. She started to move to the beat as soon as she set foot among the crowd, blending in with the moving masses of people. She closed her eyes as she danced, her face growing into a smile. She wasn't sure who she was dancing with at times, people came and went so often, and she was fine with that. Yes, she had needed a fun night out. She spotted Robin a few times, and Ted once throughout the night, but she didn't bother talking to them. She was going to go home with someone tonight, she just wasn't sure who. She was surprised to see Marshall there a little while later, Robin had said he and Lily were staying home, but she didn't think about it for long, turning around to dance with the guy who had come up behind her.

She wasn't sure how long it was until she was full on kissing the guy, and he was dragging her along to the coat check, and then they were leaving.

"Cas?" She heard as she stepped out of the club, the guys arms around her waist as they walked to get a cab. She turned to see Lily and Robin sitting on the curb, both looking upset. Cas glanced at them, then at the guy.

"Sorry, maybe next time," she said to the guy. She hadn't yet learned his name. He rolled his eyes and walked away as she went to sit with Robin and Lily.

"What's up?" She asked, sitting next to them.

"I can't get back in," Robin said, glaring over her shoulder at the security guard.

"Marshall just left, in the middle of our own party, you don't do that," Lily said, frowning. She caught the look Robin gave her. "Unless, of course, you're chasing after someone who's already done it, and then I think it's okay," she added.

"Well, I hate to take his side... but come on, a wine tasting?" Robin asked. "What's the big plan for next Saturday, scrabble night?"

"Don't check your email," Lily said, and Cas and Robin both giggled.

"Why are you becoming this person?" Robin asked a moment later. "I heard that in college you flashed a campus tour group on a dare."

"Once on a dare," Lily said, then smiled. "The other times were just for fun." She paused, then sighed. "I'm not in college anymore. I'd love to go back and be that person again, but you can't move backwards you can only go forward."

"Um, false…" Robin said, frowning. "You can go wherever you want. I guess the question is where do you want to go?" Lily thought about it for a moment, then frowned.

"I want to go into this club and find my fiance," she said.

"Well that you can't do," Robin said. They all sat in silence for a moment.

"Wanna bet?" Lily asked, getting to her feet. "Follow my lead," she said, walking over to the bouncer. Cas and Robin followed, wondering what she was doing. "Hey, big guy," she called. When the bouncer looked her way, Lily lifted her shirt, flashing him. Robin and Cas both stood there shocked. "I said follow my lead," Lily said, nudging them when she had fixed her shirt. Cas gave her a look, then sighed, ignoring the guys at the front of the line begging for them to follow Lily's lead. She gripped the bottom of her shirt and lifted it, catching her bra on the way to fully flash them. She straightened her shirt and bra as Robin followed suit. The bouncer nodded and let them into the club. As soon as they were through the door, Cas broke out into giggles.

"I've never flashed anyone before. It works so well, I wish I'd known that in college," she said, following the two girls up to the dance floor as they laughed.

The music was too loud to talk, but Lily motioned for them to split up to look for Marshall. Robin went left and Lily went right, which left Cas to loiter near the doorway. She looked around, craning her neck to try to see over the dancing people. She found Barney, grinding against a red headed girl and was just about to turn away when she saw the girl turn around, freak out, and leave. Barney came rushing towards her, and the door, walking right passed her without seeing her, a look of disgust on her face. She followed him down the stairs.

"Ted, bring your coat, we're leaving," Barney said, still not noticing her standing right behind him.

"What? What happened to that, uh, cutlet you were grinding with?" Ted asked, shedding the multiple coats he was wearing for some reason.

"That was my cousin, Leslie," Barney said, shuddering.

"What?!" Ted asked, laughing.

"No, no, no... we are not laughing about this, Ted," Barney said, walking down a couple more steps. Cas followed, trying to stifle her own laughter. "This is not going to be some funny story that we'll be telling in a couple months. It's not gonna be like, "Hey, remember that time when you were grinding with... NO! And you know why? Because, italics," he held his hands up slanted, to illustrate his next words. "This night did not happen. And you promise me that you will never, ever, ever tell another soul what transpired here tonight. You promise. Promise."

"I promise," Ted said, still trying not to laugh.

"I promise," Cas repeated, and Barney whirled around in surprise, then groaned.

Alright," Ted said, laughing. "Let's get Marshall and go, okay?" He shed the coats and turned around to talk to the coat check girl. "Hey. Thanks for saving my night. I'll talk to you soon? Umm, hey... tip her, Barney."

"Why, I didn't check a coat," Barney said, glowering at Cas who was still laughing. "And even if I did, on principle tip jars have become so…"

"Funny story," Ted began, turning back to the coat check girl. "Barney was grinding with this girl all night…"

"FINE!" Barney said panicked, fumbling in his walled for some cash. "Just... eh." He said, then turned around and went back up the stairs.

"That's a handy new trick," Ted murmured to Cas as they made to follow him. They stopped next to Robin who pointed out Lily and Marshall on the floor, making out, then turned away as Lily began to grope Marshall. Cas shook her head and followed them down to the exit, stopping to get her checked coat on the way, Ted making sure to tow Marshall and Lily along too. Robin said she was going to stay a little longer, so the five of them squeezed into the cab. Cas's ears were ringing from the loud music, and she ignored the half shouted conversation, looking out the window tiredly. She wasn't really sorry that she hadn't gone home with whats-his-name earlier, but as she sat in the cab behind Barney, catching little breezes of his cologne smell, she wished she had gone home with someone, just to get the stupid crush, or whatever it was, out of her system.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

Cas had been stretched out on her couch in her pajama pants and bra, just about to take a nap, when her eyes flew open as her door slammed shut. She jumped up, blindly reaching for whatever was closest to her to use as a weapon, but she seized a pillow, unfortunately. When she saw Barney, she threw it at him anyways.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, crossing her arms over her stomach to shield it.

"Don't you ever eat?" He asked, frowning at her.

"Yes, daily," she said, rolling her eyes and glancing around for the hoodie she had been wearing earlier. She pulled it on over her head as he sighed.

"It's Halloween. Don't you want to come watch Ted make a fool of himself?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No thanks, I'd rather just stay here," she said, settling back onto the couch, this time curling up against the arm. He huffed.

"Can I leave these here?" He asked, lifting a large duffel bag and another smaller plastic bag.

"Why?" She asked, frowning.

"They are my back up costumes, in case I strike out with the hottest girl at the party in this one," he gestured to the weird greenish flight suit he was wearing. She rolled her eyes.

"Fine," she said, gesturing to the empty desk chair. He crossed the room to set them down.

"Are you sure you don't want to come? Marshall is wearing eyeliner," he said, smothering a laugh.

"Nah. Take pictures though," she said, turning back to the tv. He left, muttering about her being a killjoy. She sighed, turning the volume up.

Barney came back to change twice, the last costume being a giant penguin suit. She laughed, but still refused to come with him when he offered. He was getting progressively more drunk, stumbling more each time he came back. By the time two o'clock rolled around, her stumbled into the apartment, fell, then struggled out of the penguin suit. Cas stopped laughing just long enough to help him up, catching him as he stumbled again. He had only been wearing a white t-shirt and his boxers under that ridiculous penguin, and she was very aware of that as she helped him toward the couch. She had never seen him this drunk, usually he just crashed at Marshall and Ted's or something.

"Yoooou neeyyt mooe," he slurred, falling onto the couch. His arm was still over her shoulder, so he dragged her down next to him.

"What?" She asked, struggling to get out of his hold. He threw his other arm over her stomach and pulled up her sweater so he could poke her stomach. She jumped away, getting to her feet.

"You," he said, pointing at her. "Neeeeto eat" he mimed eating "more." She shook her head and went to get him a glass of water.

"Here," she said, thrusting it into his hands. He took it and gulped some, then frowned.

"Thisss int beer," he slurred, frowning.

"No, its water, drink it," she said, hands on her hips. He chugged the water, then tried to stand, using the back of the couch to keep his balance.

"Where are you going?" She asked as he swayed.

"Hoooomee," he said slowly, his eyes halfway closed.

"No, you aren't. You can sleep here," she said. He looked at her, then at the couch, then shook his head, tipping a little to the side. She rushed to help him stay standing. "You can sleep on the bed then." His eyes were beginning to close and he swayed more, so she led him over to he bed. He was out by the time his head hit the pillow. She sighed, then reached over him to grab the blanket to cover him. His arm reached out suddenly to wrap around her and pull her down. She squeaked as she fell, trying her best to fall on the other side of him rather than on top of him.

"Barney, let me go," she said, trying to pull out of his grip. His eyes had closed again and he mumbled something, but he didn't let go. She struggled for a minute, but he was strong, and she was stuck between him and the wall. She sighed, then pulled the blanket up over both of them, settling in to sleep. It took a while for her heart beat to slow, but she finally relaxed into his death hold and closed her eyes. She was quite tired, even though she hadn't really gone out much that day, besides work. Barney rolled over and wrapped his arm around her waist more securely, his chest against her back and his face right behind her ear. He mumbled something.

"Hmm?" She asked, surprisingly comfortable.

"I said I could get you into bed," he whispered, sounding a little more sober, and she could feel him smiling smugly. She wasn't sure if it was the laying down, or the water, and she honestly didn't care. She chuckled and turned her face towards him.

"It doesn't count if I'm held as a prisoner," she whispered back. He shifted and she opened her eyes, a little surprised to see his eyes open too. She turned in his hold so that they were facing each other. His eyes were focused on her face, one of his eyebrow raised. In the faint light coming from the lamp she had left on beside the couch, she could just barely make out the expression on his face.

"You can leave any time you want," he said, lifting his arms away from her to show her that.

"You aren't actually drunk are you?" She asked, narrowing her eyes. "You were just faking it."

"No, I'm pretty drunk," he whispered, closing his eyes again and resting his arm around her again.

"And this is my bed, I'm not leaving," she said, trying to sound stubborn. He opened his eyes again and chuckled.

"Are you saying," he began slowly, running his hand down her side, over the thick sweater she was wearing. "That you want," he continued, running his fingers over the tiny sliver of skin that was exposed between her sweater and her pajama pants. She sucked in a breath and half closed her eyes. "Me to leave?" He finished, pushing up the sweater so that his hand was fully resting against her side, his thumb lightly stroking the bottom of her rib cage. She let out the breath she was holding, shivering as he ran his thumb back across her suddenly too warm skin. Her face was only a few inches from his, and she could feel her cheeks heating up in a blush as his pinky finger just barely dipped under the waste line of her pants to brush her hip bone. She drew in another breath, slowly, her head almost spinning as his hand inched back up her stomach. She realized her lips were just millimeters away from his and she pulled back, shaking her head.

"You're drunk," she whispered, the warmth of his hand on her ribs still clouding her mind.

"I'm not that drunk," he whispered back, his other hand reaching to wrap around the back of her neck and twist into her hair to pull her closer to him. She searched his eyes, her breathing fast and her hand ran up his arm, over his muscles and coming to rest against his neck. She wasn't sure what she was looking for exactly, but she didn't pull away as he moved closer to her this time. She closed her eyes when he closed his and her heart jumped as his lips brushed over hers softly. He pulled away a little, then pulled her close, kissing her again, harder. She let her tongue dart out to brush his lower lip and he groaned, then moved suddenly, pushing her over so he was above her and she was on her back. One of his knees was between her legs, the other near her right hip. He deepened the kiss, sliding his tongue into her mouth as she ran a hand down his back, dragging her nails against the skin there and lifting his t-shirt up as she did so. He groaned again, pulling away and resting his head on her shoulder as he breathed heavily, his breath hitting her neck and making her shiver. He sat up to remove the shirt she had half taken off of him, then he tugged at the hem of her sweater that was pushed up above her stomach. She half sat up to pull the thing off and tossed it on the floor and he returned to kissing her, this time running his lips down the side of her neck, his tongue darting out to make her shiver again. Her fingers were playing with the sensitive skin just under the band of his boxers when he reached a hand behind her to unclasp her bra. She dragged her nails up and he growled low in his throat and bit the hollow of her neck lightly, causing her to let out a small gasp. His mouth returned to hers as he pushed one of the bra straps down her shoulder.

* * *

After hearing all of Barney's conquest stories, Cas shouldn't have been surprised when she opened her eyes the next morning to an empty apartment. But she was. There was also a dull ache forming in her chest as she looked around the empty apartment, her blanket clutched around her. Of course she knew that Barney wasn't the type of guy to stay and have breakfast, he had told her that the first day she met him. She had just, for some reason, thought she was different. Not just another number on his ever growing list of sex partners. Of course she wasn't special. He just had an intensity about him that made everyone he payed attention to feel like they were special. The ache in her chest grew, and changed into something else. She puzzled over it for a moment, then gasped and sat down here she was in the middle of her living room. She didn't just like Barney. It wasn't just a stupid little crush. It was… she shook her head, not finishing the thought, and was shocked to feel dampness on her cheeks. She stood and practically stomped back to her bed to get her clothes, then to the bathroom to shower.

She rested her fingers against the tender spot on her neck, letting the warm water spill over her. What now? She didn't want it to be awkward between them, but could she pretend it didn't mean anything to her? She would have to. If all she was allowed to have of him was friendship, she would take it. It was better than nothing. She rinsed her hair slowly, running her fingers through it over and over before shutting the water off and grabbing a towel to dry off then wrapping it around her hair as she dressed. She froze as she left the bathroom, hearing keys in her door. She watched the door swing open and her heart sank as Lily came in.

"Hey," Cas said, pulling the towel from her hair and using it to squeeze any remaining water from it. "What are you doing here? Also, how did you get in?"

"Hey," Lily replied smiling. "Barney gave me this key and told me you wanted me to come over. He said you wanted to go shopping?" She phrased her answer like a question. Can had said no such thing, but she smiled anyway.

"A shopping trip is exactly what I need," Cas said, quickly braiding her wet hair.

"So?" Lily asked, leaning against the back of the couch as Cas wandered around her flat gathering things like her jacket and purse and phone.

"So what?" Cas asked.

"Why did Barney send me over here instead of you texting me?" Lily asked, a knowing look in her eyes as she raised an eyebrow.

"He was drunk, so he stayed here last night," Cas said, shrugging.

"Did you… you know," Lily asked, and Cas laughed.

"You are such a teenager sometimes, Lil," she said. "But yeah, we did." She said the words softly as though speaking them louder would make them not real.

"And?" Lily asked excitedly, leaning forward.

"And nothing," Cas said, shrugging again. "He was gone when I got up. That's how he does things."

"That jerk," Lily said, sighing. Cas chuckled.

"It's fine Lily. Just leave it be and promise not to meddle," Cas said, throwing her coat on, finally ready to go.

"I guess," Lily said sighing. "Are you okay?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" Cas asked, but she didn't meet Lily's eyes.

"Because you like Barney. And he just left without saying anything," Lily prodded. Cas sighed.

"I'm fine Lily," she said, smiling. "Now let's go. Have you started looking at wedding dresses yet? There's this really nice boutique downtown that has some really nice designs in the window, we can go look if you want." That distracted Lily, as she had meant it to. Lily launched into her ideas about her dress as they walked toward the subway station and Cas sighed in relief.

She successfully managed to avoid Barney over the next few weeks, and he didn't come over. She was pretty sure that Lily still had the key she had given him. She still hung out with the group of course, but she left before Barney got there.

Today was not so successful. She left the bar at nine, which was half an hour before Barney usually showed up, and went back to her apartment, looking down at her phone. She flipped the light on as she opened the door and nearly yelled in fright to see someone sitting on her couch.

"What are you doing here?" She hissed at Barney.

"You've been avoiding me," he said, standing up.

"Why were you sitting in the dark?" She asked, toeing off her shoes and walking around him to drop her purse on the table, ignoring his statement.

"Cas," he said, walking over to her.

"I'm not avoiding you," she mumbled, looking at her feet. "I've just been… tired, from work and stuff."

"You are a bad liar," he said, laughing.

"That's okay. You are a great one," she snapped, and stepped around him. He turned and grabbed her arm, pulling her around to face him.

"I'm sorry," he said, surprising her into meeting his eyes. "And you can tell I'm not lying. I am sorry." He ran his hand though his hair and sighed. "I'm really bad at the, uh, caring part. I shouldn't have left, but that's just what I do. I don't do the whole… relationship thing. And I realize that you aren't just another one of my one night stands, you're my friend and-"

"It's okay," she said, cutting him off.

"I didn't promise you anything," he continued.

"No you didn't," she agreed. "And it's fine," she gave him a half smile. "I didn't expect anything, I just wasn't sure…" She trailed off, not sure how to word what she was trying to say.

"So friends?" He asked, smiling down at her. She opened her mouth, then closed it.

"Friends," she said, tearing her eyes away from his.

"With benefits," he added, smirking. She rolled her eyes, glad to have this familiarity back.

"Yeah, no," she said, making a look of disgust. As she turned away this time, he let her go, and she distantly realized that if he actually wanted to be friends with benefits, she wouldn't say no. She didn't think she could say no to anything he asked at this point. She sighed, angry with herself. When did she turn into such a stupid lovesick girl?

"Want to go to the bar?" He asked, his hands in his pockets.

"I just came from there," she said, settling into the couch.

"Yes but you were just leaving to avoid me," he said, smirking again. "So lets go back." She looked up at him and sighed, then stood.

"Fine," she said, grabbing her purse form the table again and following him out the door. "So do you still have a key or does Lily have it now?"

"Oh, I gave her a copy I made," he said, walking beside her. "I can get it back if you don't want her to have one."

"No it's fine, I was going to give her one anyway," Cas said, shrugging.

"Heeeeey!" The group cheered as they both came in the bar and squeezed into the booth. Cas sat by Lily and Robin, rather than by Barney as she usually did.

"I'm glad you guys are done fighting, it was getting lame," Lily said to Barney, who rolled his eyes.

"Ooh, my story's on," Robin said, pointing to the tv over Ted's shoulder. "Ted, pay attention. Carl, turn it up," she called to the bartender, who did as she asked.

"I'm here with Ellen Pierce, New York's premiere matchmaker. Ellen, your company, Love Solutions boasts a 100% success rate. What's your secret?" Robin asked on the tv.

"Science," the woman exclaimed, then turned to look at the camera. "Everything in life can be broken down to ones and zeros, even love. All I have to do is input the variables, run the algorithm, and presto manifesto, you have a soulmate, and it works. Just ask all of my happy couples. And these are just the attractive ones, I have more photos in the bathroom."

"Love Solution's Ellen Pierce," Robin said to the camera, a smile on her face. "A beacon of hope for New York city's lovelorn. Robin Scherbatsky…"

"Was that chick at the end really a client?" Barney asked, turning back to far the table.

"Yes," Robin said, nodding.

"We're signing up," Barney told Ted, grinning.

"What?" Ted asked, surprised.

"Ted, these chicks are desperate and hot," he said. "That's a perfect cocktail. Shake well, then sleep with." Cas looked down for only half a second, then reached over and stole Robin's beer. Robin didn't notice.

"I'm not going to a matchmaker," Ted said, frowning. "That's like giving up. It's the man version of getting a cat."

"No, it wasn't a cockroach," Marshall interrupted them. "It had fur and only mammals have fur."

"It was a cockroach," Lily insisted.

"Come on, Lily, the only way that that was a cockroach was if it was wearing the skin of a mouse it just killed," Marshall said, then his eyes widened in horror.

"Oh my God," Lily said, grabbing Barney's drink from his hands immediately after the waitress had brought it. She threw back the whole thing.

"Come on," Barney said angrily.

"What were they talking about?" Cas asked Robin as Lily, Marshall, and Ted went upstairs.

"Some creature that Lily saw in the apartment," Robin said, shrugging. "Hey, is that my beer?"

"Not anymore," Cas said, finishing it off as Barney stood to go up to the counter and hit on some black haired girl there. "I'm heading home."

"You owe me a beer," Robin said, pouting as she stood.

"Fine, fine," Cas mumbled, going up to the bar to order Robin's beer. She payed for it and carried it back to the table where some guy had come over to talk to Robin. Cas set it down and left without saying another word.

* * *

"Hey Robin, Barney, where's Ted?" Cas asked, sitting down at the groups normal booth with her drink the next Friday. "I thought you guys were going to the computer love match place."

"I got kicked out," Barney said, frowning dramatically.

"Aww," she said, trying not to laugh. "You poor baby."

"Guys," Lily said, rushing in with Marshall following. "It's back. And it's bigger."

"It's been feeding," Marshall added.

"So what is it?" Cas asked, sipping her beer. Lily grabbed Barney's drink and downed it again.

"Oh come on," he muttered.

"It's got six legs and a hard exoskeleton, like a cockroach," Lily said.

"But it's got patches of brown gray fur, and a tail, like a mouse," Marshall added, sitting down beside Cas and Robin as Lily slid in next to Barney.

"It's called," Lily said, pausing for dramatic tension. "a cockamouse." Barney snorted as the waitress bright him another drink and shots for Lily and Marshall.

"What?" Robin asked, frowning.

"It's some sort of mutant combination of the two. It's as if a cockroach and a mouse...you know…" Lily said, moving her hands together in the air.

"Did the horizontal ten-legged interspecies cha-cha?" Barney supplied, picking up his new drink.

"That's impossible," Robin said shaking her head. "That simply can't happen."

"Oh, but it can," Lily said, picking up her shot.

"And it has," Marshall added, picking up his shot as well.

"And it's pissed," Lily finished. She and Marshall toasted each other and threw back the shots as Cas laughed and Robin shook her head.

"Dude, is everything OK?" Ted asked, walking into the bar. "You left the front door open."

"There was no time," Marshall said dramatically. Cas snorted and finished her beer.

"So Love Solutions, did you meet the love of your life?" Robin asked as Ted pulled up a chair.

"She said it'd take three days," he said, his face wrinkling in worry. "It's been five days. Should I be worried?"

"Oh, just play it cool," Lily said, sipping another drink. "Don't Ted out about it." Ted nodded in agreement, then lifted his head.

"Did you just use my name as a verb?" He asked, looking back and forth between Lily and Barney.

"Oh, yeah, we do that behind your back," Barney said, half smirking. "Ted-out: to overthink. Also see Ted-up. Ted-up: to overthink something with disastrous results. Sample sentence: Billy Tedded up when-"

"Okay, I get it," Ted said, cutting Barney off as the others laughed. "Don't worry, I'm not gonna Ted anything up or out. I'll just give it a few more days." He stood and left the bar.

"He's going over there now isn't he?" Robin asked as he left.

"Undoubtedly," Lily added, nodding her agreement. She looked over at Marshall. "Chimichanga."

"Well, we have to go," Marshall said, standing up abruptly. He and Lily left the bar at a near run.

"That's Lily's code word for 'I want to have sex right now.' They are so obvious," Barney said, shaking his head in mock sorrow.

"So what's on the agenda for the night?" Robin asked, knocking back her drink.

"Strip club," Barney said, grinning.

"I'm going home, I have some things to go over before work on Monday," Cas said, standing.

"Lame," Barney said, shaking his head again.

"Also I don't want to go to a strip club," she added.

"Really lame," Barney said.

"No, what's lame is that you have to pay women to see their boobs," She said, then laughed with Robin as he pouted. She left the bar smiling.

* * *

"And it could fly," Lily said, finishing telling the table about the cockamouse they had finally caught and thrown out the window earlier that day. It was a Monday night and the bar was mostly empty. "It had wings like a bat."

"It did," Robin added, now a believer. Cas just shook her head, smiling a little.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

"Hey Cas, want to come to Queens with Robin and me?" Lily asked over the phone.

"Sure, right now?" Cas asked, shutting the door to her apartment behind her and walking in to set her single grocery bag on the table. She unpacked it as Lily spoke.

"Yeah as soon as Robin gets here," Lily said.

"Sure, I'll be over in five," Cas said, smiling.

"Great, bye," Lily said, and Cas hung up the phone and finished putting her things away, then grabbed her purse and left her apartment again.

They took the subway to Queens, getting off at one of the window shopping districts.

"I need to start thinking about Christmas presents," Robin sighed as they walked past an antique shop.

"It's too early for that," Lily said, waving her hand at them. "Oh, my apartment is on the next street. Want to stop by?"

"You have your own apartment?" Robin asked. "Why?"

"I thought you lived with Ted and Marshall," Cas said, looking in the window of a jewelry store.

"I could see how you would think that but I have to have my own place," Lily said, leading them down another street lined with shops and restaurants. "It's an independence thing."

"When was the last time you were there?" Robin asked, shaking her head.

"Three months ago," Lily replied, smiling. Robin laughed and Cas shook her head.

"What? It's like fat pants," she said. "You hope you never have to use 'em but you're glad to know they're there." Lily drew them to a stop in front of a little Chinese restaurant and stared at it for a second, then looked on either side of it.

"What the hell?" Lily asked, pulling open the door of the restaurant.

"What?" Cas asked, looking around too.

"This is my apartment," Lily said, leading them inside.

"Where?" Robin asked, looking up at the building before walking in.

"Right here," Lily said, astonished.

"Lily," Robin said gently as though Lily was going to bolt. "This is a Chinese restaurant."

"No, no, this was my apartment," Lily insisted, turning around. "My dresser was right…" She turned to point at a wooden dresser. "That's my dresser! And this is my closet," she goes over to the door and pulls open the closet, then turned back to them. "And I spilled nail polish there. There's the stain!" She pointed to a red mark on the carpet.

"Hi, how many?" A waitress dressed in a brightly colored kimono asked, coming up to them. Lily turned forward her. "Lily!" She said in surprise.

"Yes," Lily said. "You know me?"

"Yeah, from your homecoming picture," the Chinese woman said nodding. "You're much prettier in person."

"Yeah, I know, the bangs were a mistake," Lily began, then shook her head. "Where's my stuff?"

"It's all in the back," she said, half turning to gesture to the back of the building. "We could wrap it up for you. You want it to go?" Cas covered her mouth to keep from laughing.

"This is my apartment!"Lily said indignantly.

"Not anymore," the waitress replied with a tiny bow. "They sent you a notice about this."

"When?" Lily cried.

"Three month ago," she said, and this time Cas let out a chuckle. The woman went to the back and came back carrying a few paper bags and a bundle of envelopes. "Here's your mail minus the magazines." She said, dropping the bundle into one of the bags.

"Didn't you have a lease on the apartment Lily?" Cas asked, reaching to grab two more of the bags the woman brought up.

"Okay so I didn't have a written lease as such but, but go ask my landlady, Mrs. Conroy," Lily said to the waitress, then turned back to Robin and Cas. "She may be 98 years old but she's still…" Lily trailed off then turned back to the waitress in horror. "She's dead, isn't she?"

"Never even saw the bus," the woman said with a polite smile. Lily gasped and turned to walk out of the restaurant. Cas was full out laughing by the time they got back to the subway.

"I can't believe that just happened," she said, following Robin and Lily, both holding brown paper bags, onto the train. Lily just shook her head.

* * *

"You guys will never believe what just happened to us," Lily said as they entered the apartment carrying Lily's things.

"I don't even believe it myself," Robin added and Cas shook her head in an agreement.

"We were in Queens and we decided to stop by my apartment," Lily said, then proceeded to tell them the rest of the story.

"No way," Ted said, shaking his head. "You're making this up."

"Yeah, the building would have had to give you some sort of notice," Marshall said.

"Well," Lily began, looking sheepish. "They did, three months ago, but I haven't stopped by in… three months."

"Well, still, legally, they can't just toss you out onto the street. You have a lease," Marshall said, then stopped as Robin and Cas both shook their heads.

"It was a spoken agreement, and the landlady died," Lily said, sitting down on the couch.

"I need a drink," Robin said, heading back out the door. "Coming?" She asked over her shoulder. Cas shrugged and followed, leaving the others to talk.

She ordered a pitcher of beer and paid for it as Robin sat in their usual booth. Cas had barely set the pitcher and cups down when Barney appeared out of no where and slid in next to her, across from Robin.

"Hey, what's up?" Barney asked, pouring himself a beer. Cas rolled her eyes as Robin launched into the story of their day. Ted joined them part way through.

"So what's Lily going to do?" Robin asked, looking over at him.

"Oh, she's moving in with us," he said, pouring himself some beer. "She already practically lives there, it won't change anything."

"No, it's like it'll change everything. Oh, Ted, you are so screwed," Barney said, shaking his head.

"What?" Ted asked, looking over at him. "What are you talking about?"

"And why is that girl checking you out?" Cas asked, nodding to the girl who had been staring at their table for the better part of the story.

"Because I look good," Barney said with a smirk, straightening his tie. "Now focus, you and Marshall are roommates. You have an amazing apartment. Marshall and Lily just got engaged."

"Yeah," Ted said, nodding. "So?"

"So, you're not still gonna be his roommate when he gets married, are you?" Barney asked as though it were obvious. "Someone's going to move out. So who's it gonna be?"

"Come on, Barney," Robin said, shaking her head. "I'm sure they've talked about who gets the apartment." She turned to Ted and frowned. "You talked about who gets the apartment, right?"

"Yeah, we've talked about it…" Ted said, then trailed off. "Well, actually, we always just decided to think about it in the future."

"You blew it, dude," Barney said, shaking his head sadly. "Now that Lily's there, it's a whole new dynamic. They're edging you out."

"That's crazy. They're not edging me out," Ted said. "Marshall's my best friend." Barney huffed out a breath and threw his arms up like an over dramatic girl. Cas laughed. "One of my best friends," Ted said, rolling his eyes. "He wouldn't do that to me."

"Just keep your eyes open. That's all I'm saying, Ted," Barney said seriously. "Little things are gonna be changing around that apartment."

"Come on, Barney, you're just being paranoid," Cas said, smiling. "Okay, seriously, what is this girl's deal?" They all looked over at the girl and she waved to Barney who waved back, smirking.

"I'm sort of on a date with her," Barney said, turning back to them.

"What?" Ted asked incredulously.

"I found her online," Barney said, grinning. "I'm tired of the whole bar scene, the one-night hookups. I'm looking for a soul-mate, someone who I can love and cuddle," he paused. "Or so it says in my profile," he said, then gave a very evil laugh. "But this girl, she wants the same stuff and it's bumming me out." He said, shaking his head. "All right, Ted, call me from the hospital."

"All right," Ted replied as Barney stood.

"You're going to the hospital?" Robin asked, confused.

"No, see, he's gonna go back over there and I'm gonna call him and he's gonna pretend that it's an emergency call from a family member at the hospital," Ted explained.

"Oh, Lord, fake emergency?" Robin said, shaking her head. "That is lamest, most pathetic cop-out in the book. I expect more from you, Barney."

"Well, stay tuned, I'm working on some stuff. But in the meantime, wish me luck," he said, then left to sit across from the girl.

"So, are you gonna talk to Marshall?" Cas asked, returning to the conversation

"He's gonna want the apartment. I'm gonna want the apartment. It's gonna lead to an argument, so no," he said, lifting his glass to his mouth.

"Hm, that's real healthy. So, when a serious issue comes up, your response is just to avoid it," Robin pointed out.

"I should really make this call," Ted said, pulling out his phone and dialing.

"Ooh, can I do it?" Robin asked as they turned to look at Barney. Ted slid the phone over to her and she held it to her ear.

"Hello?" Barney said, answering his phone.

"Hi there, sexy," Robin said, sounding seductive.

"Hello, Aunt Kathy, what's up?" They could hear Barney say from his booth. Cas stifled a laugh as Ted covered his mouth.

"Oh, nothing," Robin said, twirling her hair around a finger like girls did in movies. "Just sitting here, thinking about you, hot stuff."

"An accident?" They heard Barney say, his face falling. "Well, is Uncle Rudy gonna be okay?"

"Aunt Kathy's got an itch that only you can scratch, big boy," Robin said, smirking into the phone.

"Oh God! Why did he think he could build his own helicopter?" Barney fake cried into the phone.

"Come on, daddy," Robin said, biting her lip. "Break me off a piece of that white chocolate."

"Well, if he needs a transplant, he can have mine," Barney said into the phone. To his credit he didn't crack a smile once. "I'll be right there." He started fake sobbing and stuttered to the girl, the left the bar, stopping by their booth for half a second.

"See you guys later," he said, his face normal, then resumed his fake crying and left the bar. Cas let out her laughter then, and Ted shook his head.

* * *

The next evening found the four of them in the same booth, drinking beer, and talking.

"He was gonna take the swords down," Ted was saying as Cas sat in the open seat next to him. "Can you believe that?"

"Ted, why don't you just talk to him?" Robin asked. "He's your best friend." Barney interrupted with a sound of protest that was halfway between a cat giving birth and a dog getting hit by a car. "One of your best friends," Robin corrupted, rolling her eyes. "The point is, maybe it's time for some healthy communication."

"Healthy communication?" Barney repeated in a mocking voice. "That's the worst idea ever. Look, you held off their first advance. That's good. Now it's time to counter-strike."

"Yeah, well, what am I supposed to do?" Ted asked, frowning.

"You gotta mark your territory, and I don't mean missing the toilet," Barney said. leaning back. "You gotta do something big."

"What, like buy a new sofa?" Ted asked, paying attention now.

"Bigger," Barney said, grinning. A girl walked past them and Barney stood. "Katie's here. Okay, real quick, last night, epiphany!" He said, leaning over the table to talk quietly. "I realized what the world of dating needs. Ready? A lemon law." He waved his hands out in front of him as though displaying a sign.

"A lemon law, like for cars?" Cas asked, frowning.

"Exactly. From the moment the date begins you have five minutes to decide whether you're going to commit to an entire evening," he said, standing straight again. "And if you don't, it's no hard feelings just good night, thanks for playing, see you never." He grinned, waiting for them to applaud his idea. "Huh? Huh? The lemon law, it's gonna be a thing, possibly starting right now." He walked to a nearby table and introduced himself. They could all hear the woman reply in a very nasally, loud voice, and Barney glanced back at them for a second, tilting his head as though saying, 'see, it should be a thing' then turned back to Katie. She left a few moments later and he called after her "Tell your friends." As he sat back down at their table and turned to them. "It's gonna be a thing." Cas shook her head and stood. She had only stopped by because Robin had asked her to, and now she was going to go home and work on her notes.

The week passed quickly for Cas, and she didn't see any of the gang until the next Friday. As word got around about the new psychologist at the college, more and more students were making appointments. So much so that she had extended her office hours from 9-5, to 8-7 every day but Friday. The new schedule kept her busy, and tired, which she was fine with. She liked being able to think that she was doing good in the world, or at least, helping someone else into a better frame of mind.

When Friday rolled around she was the first one to the bar and had consumed two vodka cranberries and was on her second glass of beer by the time anyone else got there. Barney got there first, but he was waiting for another date, so he didn't come over. Robin arrived next and sat next to her at the bar since their usual booth was taken.

"You're a jerk," the girl Barney had been talking to said loudly.

"No, I'm a visionary," Barney said as she stormed away. "Lemon law, it's gonna be a thing!" He said, walking over to the bar to stand between them.

"For the record, your little lemon law is a symbol of everything that's wrong with our no-attention span society," Robin said, sipping on the drink she had just ordered.

"No, wrong, lemon law is awesome," Barney said.

"It takes longer than five minutes to really get to know someone," Cas said, agreeing with Robin. "You keep giving up on people so quickly, you're gonna miss out on something great." Robin nodded in agreement.

"Okay, you're on a blind date," Barney said, looking around the bar for an example. "Sitting across the table is that guy." He says, pointing to a geeky looking guy across the bar from them. "You really think it'll take more than five minutes to realize there will be no date number two?"

"Well, first of all, I don't go on dates, not even blind ones," Cas said, watching the guy. "Second of all, maybe you are right. I know it's a little judgmental," she said, holding up her hands as Robin huffed in annoyance. "But really."

"Well I still think it takes more than five minutes. For all I know, that guy's my soul-mate," Robin said. Cas grinned at the same time Barney did, guessing where he was going with this.

"Bad move, Scherbatsky," he said, moving off to talk to the geeky guy. "Hi, have you met Robin?" He said, gesturing to Robin. Cas lifted a hand to cover her mouth.

"Hi," the guy said, half waving.

"Hi," Robin replied hesitantly, not wanting to back down.

She ended up agreeing to go out to dinner with him and the two of them left the bar, Barney watching the whole time with a smirk on his face.

"Well, I really thought she would back down by now," Barney said, shaking his head.

"She's too stubborn," Cas said, grinning. She ordered another vodka cranberry and sipped it while Barney checked his phone. He called Robin twenty minutes later.

"Time's running out, Scherbatsky," he said into the receiver. Cas turned to try to listen but she couldn't hear Robin's response. "Last chance for the lemon law. 4:56, 4:57, 4:58." He looked at his watch as he pretended to count down. "Say I'm right and this could all be over. This could be your call from the hospital." He closed his phone and sighed.

"She's still insisting?" Cas asked, chuckling.

"Yeah, oh well, her loss," he said, picking up his new glass of scotch and finishing the whole thing in one go. "There's no more hot chicks here," he whined, looking around the bar.

"Well I'm mildly offended," Cas said, but the words came out a little slow.

"You know what I mean," he said, flapping a hand at her, then turning to look at her, a frown on his face. "How much have you had to drink?"

"I dunno like three of these and some beer?" She said, gesturing to the empty cranberry vodka.

"She's had five of those," Carl the bartender said as he passed them. "And half a pitcher of beer. And a martini."

"Okay," Barney said in a false cheerful voice. "Let's get you home," he said, helping her to stand as she stumbled against the chairs and the bar. He kept his arm around her waist as he walked her back home.

"I'm not that drunk," she protested, though she had had more than she thought and her vision was starting to blur a little.

"Says the girl who just consumed her body weight in alcohol," he said sarcastically, using his keys to unlock the front door of the building and get her inside.

"I didn't realize," she started to say, then lost track of her thought.

"Didn't realize?" He prompted as he pushed open her apartment door.

"I had so much," she finished, bracing herself on the door frame. He led her in and to the couch, letting her sit. "My head," she moaned, feeling it start to pound. "Lights?" She asked, not sure she was making sense. A second later the bright lights turned off to be replaced by the softer light of her desk lamp. "Thanks," she murmured. "And thanks for helping."

"Here drink this," he said, shoving a glass into her hands. She drank it, then tried to stand to take the glass back to the kitchen. He caught her as she stumbled forward.

"Holy crap," she said, leaning against him. "The floor is moving." He chuckled.

"Come on," he said, leading her back to her bed to sit her back down. "Go to sleep."

"It's only like 6," she protested.

"Well maybe you shouldn't get drunk so early," he retaliated. "Why are you drunk anyway? You are the one in the group who almost never gets drunk."

"Work is stressful," she sighed, closing her eyes and swaying a little.

"Well next time go easy on the vodka cranberries," he suggested. She leaned forward and wrapped her arms around his shoulders.

"Thanks," she said, her eyes still closed.

"No problem," he said, trying to pry her arms off and sit her down.

"No," she said, tightening her grip. "I mean, thanks for not letting me jump. You now, back whenever. I didn't want to jump," she whispered, and he patted her back. "You're a good friend Barney," she added as she released him and sat back on her bed, then fell onto her pillow, asleep.

He sighed and shook his head, turning off the desk lamp as he went to the door and left.

* * *

Cas was shaken awake and sat up slowly, her head still swimming a little, though she wasn't as drunk as before.

"Cas, Lily's in the hospital," Barney said. That sobered her up. She swung her feet to the floor, shoes still on from her earlier trip to the bar, and stood without swaying.

"Is she okay?" Cas asked, looking around for her coat and purse. Barney handed them both to her and she followed him out of the apartment to the street where a cab was waiting for them.

"I dunno. Marshall said he stabbed her with a sword," Barney said. If Lily hadn't been hurt Cas might have found that a little funny. She made him stop by the waiting room so she could throw up in the bathroom on the way into the hospital, and when she came out, Robin was waiting there too.

"Rough night?" Robin asked. Cas just shook her head and the three of them went to the waiting room. "Is she okay?" Robin asked, seeing Marshall and Ted both sitting there.

"They're just patching her up," Marshall said, smiling up at them though his face was still worried. "She's gonna be fine."

"So get this, I was on a date with this girl, Jackie," Barney began, then stopped when everyone stared at him. "What? You said she's fine. So, anyway, I was on date with this girl, Jackie. So I told her, "Wow, Jackie, you make a really great first impression. I have a feeling that tonight you might end up being Jackie O."" he made obscene gestures with his hands that had Cas shaking her head and Robin rolling her eyes. "And she said "Yeah, I'm sorry, I'm gonna have to lemon law you." It's out there, it's a thing. The lemon law is a thing. Damn, I should have called it Barney's law."

"But you were totally…" Robin began, but Ted interrupted her.

"Just let him have this one," he said, and she shrugged. They all turned as the doctor came out of the room.

"All set," he said. "She said she'd like to see the knights of the poorly constructed round table?"

"That's us," Marshall and Ted say at the same time, glancing at each other then getting up to go into Lily's room.

"So what exactly happened?" Cas asked, rubbing her temples.

"Ted said they were sword fighting to see who gets to keep the apartment," Robin informed them. Cas laughed.

"Of course they were," she said.

"And the table broke and Marshall fell just as Lily was coming in the door and his sword just stabbed her," Robin finished.

"And not in the good way," Barney added. Cas snorted.

"Guys, were going to go out for dinner, you want to come?" Ted asked, coming back out of the room, Marshall and Lily behind them. Lily put her jacket on over her tank top and shoulder bandage, and Barney, Robin, and Cas got up to follow them out to the street to get a cab. Squeezing all six of them into the cab was not fun, but they managed it.

They went to the Chinese restaurant where Lily's apartment used to be and got a table, Cas sitting across from Barney at the end of the table.

"Chinese restaurant," Ted said as they waited for their food to arrive. "I still don't believe it."

"I told you," Lily said, grinning. "OK, a toast," she said and everyone lifted their cups.

"Life is full of changes. One day you have an apartment, the next day it's a house of dumplings. But the important stuff doesn't change. To the important stuff," she said, and everyone clinked their glasses together and took a sip.

"Here here." "Cheers."

"And to the lemon law," Barney said, but everyone ignored him and put their glasses down. "Self-clink," he said, and picked up his water glass to clink. Cas rolled her eyes and gave him a look.

"And by the way, I bought these glasses," Lily said, holding up her cup. "I bought them at Ikea. These are my glasses."

"I love this song," Marshall said. "I haven't heard this in forever."

"I'm pretty sure this is a mix tape you made me in sophomore year," Lily said, grinning.

"Lily, your apartment makes the best Shanghai dumplings," Robin said, taking one from the platter in front of them.

Over the music, Marshall's voice played. "I love you, Lily. Happy Valentine's Day 1998." The table let up a cheer as the next song came on, all of them grinning. Cas smiled to herself, her headache easing as she ate the Chinese food and listened to Ted, Marshall, and Lily talked about their college years. They stayed at the Chinese place until it closed at midnight, then went back to the bar. Cas went home before the bar, not wanting any more to drink as her head still pounded a little from her drinks that afternoon.

* * *

"Hey," Lily said as her and Marshall slid into the booth across from Robin and Barney. Ted pulled up a chair on the end of the table. "Where's Cas?"

"I dunno, she's not home," Robin said, shrugging. "Maybe she's still at work."

"No she said she took all this week off," Lily said, shaking her head. It was only two days before Thanksgiving, but the bar was pretty crowded. Maybe she just hadn't wanted to hang out today.

"If she had off the last few days how come she hasn't been here?" Ted asked, sipping his beer.

"And come to think of it, she wasn't home when I stopped by yesterday either," Lily said, frowning.

"We should call her," Marshall said. Barney pulled out his phone an dialed, then put it on speaker phone in the middle of the table.

"Hello?" She asked, and Barney sighed in relief.

"Cas?" Lily asked. "Where are you?"

"Staten Island," Cas said. "Why?"

"We were wondering why you weren't here," Ted said.

"Yeah, why didn't you tell us you were leaving?" Lily said, her face almost pouting.

"I did tell you. On Saturday," Cas said, and sighed. "I guess you were all a little more drunk than I thought you were."

"Oh yeah, I sort of remember that," Robin said.

"Why Staten Island? I didn't know you had family out there," Lily said.

"Yeah my whole family is out here. And Thanksgiving is my moms favorite holiday, so I visit them every year," Cas said with a laugh.

"Okay well I guess we'll see you when you get back. You are coming back right?" Lily said.

"Of course. I work on Monday," Cas said.

"Okay bye," Lily said, then hung up the phone after Cas said goodbye.

Cas tucked her phone into her pocket and leaned back against the hard stone behind her, sighing. It was a nice day out, sunny and sort of warm, for November. There were no clouds in the sky, and no wind in the trees, and the graveyard she sat in was completely empty. She leaned her head back against the gravestone and watched the sun going down over the trees. Finally, when it was dark and a little cold out, she went back to her parents old car and drove it to her parents old house. When her family had died in her senior year of high school, she had just barely turned 18, but that meant that she got possession of everything her family had left behind. She hadn't changed anything in the house in the last nine years. She had continued paying the bills and taxes on the place and keeping the cars maintained and insured. She had someone who came by once a week to dust and vacuum and make sure the house was still okay. She knew it was a waste of money, but both her grandparents had been rich, and her parents had both been only children so when they died, and left Cas as the only surviving family member, she had inherited not only her parent's money, but the trust funds her grandparents had left behind. In her opinion, money was a very poor consolation prize for not having any family.

Thanksgiving had always been the one holiday each year when both of her parents were off of work, so it had become the family's big holiday, rather than Christmas as most families had. Her father was always away on work during Christmas. So every year, Cas took the train out to Staten Island and spent the week at her old childhood home. It was the only time she spent there. The rest of the year it was empty.

She would spend the week looking through her old things, or her parents old things, or the photo albums that stayed on the bookshelf downstairs. And every day she would drive the three miles to the graveyard and sit by the three gravestones there that shared her last name. She never talked to them, just sat in silence, watching the sky. Sometimes she would bring a book and just sit and read. She really did like the graveyard. The trees around the edges didn't block out the sun at all, but they did block out the sound from the road. The gravestones would cast nice shadows as the sun set, and the grass there was always soft. She figured, as grave yards went, this was a pretty good one to be buried in. She had a cemetery lot there too. Her parents had purchased all four at once. Hers was blank and obviously empty, right on the other side of her sisters grave. She laid there sometimes, looking up at the sky and wondering what it would be like to die.

As she entered the house, she took off her shoes and set them on the mat by the front door, right next to her parents and sisters shoes that still rested there. Then she made her way up the stairs in the dark to the room she had lived in during high school. If she left the lights off it was easy to feel like she was just coming home late and trying to be quiet so her parents wouldn't wake up. She left the lights off in her room too, dropping her purse and things on the floor by the door, just like she used to do during high school when she came home with her back pack. She flopped down onto her bed, face down on the pillow and just laid there for a few moments. She eventually succumbed to sleep, not bothering to get up and change out of her jeans.

The next morning she woke up disoriented, as she did nearly every time she slept here. It was something about the way the house smelled, or sounded, or maybe it was just the atmosphere, but she would wake up, open her eyes to her old room, and half expect to hear her mother calling them downstairs for breakfast, or for her sister to come running in the room and jump on the bed to wake her up, or to at least hear the garage door opening as her father left for work. But it was silent, no matter how long she waited, and she would sigh and get up, go across the hall to the bathroom, then downstairs to the kitchen and eat cereal in her pajamas. The only difference between this breakfast and the ones she used to have on Saturday mornings when she was usually the first one up, was that she had bought the groceries, not her mother, and that she wouldn't pour a bowl and leave the milk out for her sister to find when she got up. After breakfast she would put the bowl in the sink and watch whatever was on tv in the morning, just like all her Saturday's through out high school. Except she wouldn't hear the movement from upstairs of her parents getting up, or the impatient huff from the kitchen as her sister discovered the bowl in the sink, or the running water as her sister, who was a little bit of a neat freak, rinsed out both their bowls and put them into the dishwasher, then joined her on the couch to watch tv. And she wouldn't hear the water running as her mother took a shower and dressed for Saturday morning ladies group at church, and she wouldn't be roused in half an hour to go on a jog with her dad.

She did go on the jog though, running the streets they used to run every weekend, her body following the path without having to think about it. She waved to the few people up this early, getting the paper from their mail boxes or putting the trash out to be picked up. And they would wave back, even if they didn't know who she was, because that's what people did out here in the suburbs.

She made that jog every day she was there. If she let her mind wander, she could almost imagine she heard the footsteps of her father, who always ran just behind her and a bit to the right, and his heavy breathing as he tried not to let her know how much he disliked running. It was just one of those things they did every week that he was home.

Tomorrow was Thanksgiving, Cas realized on her morning jog. She wasn't going to cook a turkey, there would be no point since most of it would go bad before she could eat it. She would, however, bring a beer to the graveyard and sit with her family. No one ever visited the graveyard on Thanksgiving. Not like on Christmas, when people would feel the need to crowd the graveyard. She had only gone there on one Christmas, the first year, and hadn't gone back because of how many people would come by, crying for their relatives. On Thanksgiving, they were all happily celebrating the members of their family who were not dead, which meant she had privacy.

Maybe she would stop at the store and get some apple cider or something instead. She had been consuming way too much beer recently. Usually she only had one or two throughout the whole year, but ever since she had met Barney and the others, she'd been having one at least twice a week. At least she had begun building up a tolerance toward it. She only got tipsy off three beers now.

As she finished her jog and showered to get the sweat off, she decided that this year she wouldn't stay the whole week. She would take the train back to Manhattan on Thanksgiving night. She knew Ted and Robin were staying in town for the holidays, and she would prefer to spend at least part of her holiday with people who were still alive.

The next morning she drove to the cemetery sans beer or apple cider. It was colder today, maybe cold enough for snow, but the sky was clear. She sat by her sisters grave stone this time, leaning back against it like she always did. If the grave stone wasn't so cold she could pretend is was her sisters back she was leaning against, her head on her shoulder, cloud watching like they had when they were little, leaning against each other in the back yard and naming the shapes of the various clouds. Cas closed her eyes, letting the wind tangle her hair, since she hadn't bothered putting it up that morning.

Maybe she should have brought alcohol of some sort, she thought, shivering in the wind. It would have warmed her up a little. Maybe if she could cry she wouldn't feel so cold, but she hadn't cried here in years, it just wasn't how she liked to remember the holiday.

It was after noon sometime when another car pulled into the parking lot and a family began to pile out. There were three little kids and one baby, as well as the mother and father. She watched them for a moment, then stood and brushed off her pants. This was the first time she had ever seen anyone visit on Thanksgiving, but it was alright this time, she felt like it was time to leave anyway. She stretched and headed to the gate, passing the family as she did so. She didn't greet them, though they all smiled at her.

She drove home in silence, only going inside to grab the backpack of clothes she had brought, then locked the door and started walking into the busier part of the town where the subway stations were. It was almost four miles to the closest train station, but she felt the need to walk. Besides, it was hard to get a cab out here, especially on holidays. She was walking slowly, so it took over an hour to reach the station, then she had to wait another hour for the next train. At least the station was pretty empty. The ride took about half an hour, and then she was home by four. The bar was closed, so she wasn't sure where everyone was, and none of them answered their phones. She sat on her couch, wondering what to do now, then flipped on the tv for some noise, before deciding to go on a jog, since she hadn't gone that morning. She dressed and grabbed her jacket, then began her usual two mile circle around her apartment. The streets were much emptier than usual, since most people were just starting dinner, or out of town visiting relatives. Her phone rang halfway through her run, and she stopped to fish it out.

"Hello?" She asked, not having looked at the number before she answered.

"Hey, Cas," Robin said. "You called?"

"Yeah," Cas said, catching her breath. "I'm back in town early, so I was just wondering what you guys were all doing."

"Well," Robin said, sounding a little ashamed. "We were volunteering at a food thing for homeless people, but Ted got us kicked out. Why are you out of breath?"

"Oh, I'm jogging. You got kicked out?" She said, not surprised. It seemed like something Ted could cause accidentally.

"Yeah. long story. And now we are going to The Lusty Leopard," Robin said.

"Um, why?" Cas asked, now walking down the street, following her route.

"We sort of owe Barney," Robin said. "Wanna come with?"

"I guess so. I don't have anything else to do," Cas said, shrugging before she remembered that Robin couldn't see her.

"Cool," Robin said. "We'll meet you there in half an hour?"

"Sure," Cas said, beginning to run again, since she only had half an hour now.

"Okay great, see ya," Robin said, then hung up the phone. Cas held her phone in her hand for the rest of the jog, pushing herself faster than she usually ran so she would have enough time to shower before meeting them. She made the mile in just under seven minutes, a new record for her, panting as she let herself into her apartment. She stripped off her sweater and her yoga pants as she headed to the bathroom for a five minute shower, then pulled on jeans and a shirt and headed out the door. Barney's favorite strip club was four stops away on the subway, so she took that rather than trying to find a cab. She walked up to the building just as Ted, Barney, and Robin got out of the cab.

"Hey!" Cas said, waving to them.

"How are you parents?" Robin asked as she approached them.

"Same as always," Cas said, shrugging. "So why are we at a strip club?"

"Barney is on community service. Get this, he got arrested for public urination," Ted said, laughing. Barney huffed as Cas laughed.

"Seriously?" She asked.

"Yeah. And he has to volunteer, and we sort of got him kicked out of the food bank," Ted said, tucking his hands into his pockets.

"How?" Cas asked, following them into the dimly lit building.

"The guy in charge was taking donations, so I threw mushrooms-" Ted began.

"You know what? I don't really want to know," Cas interrupted, laughing. She followed them to the buffet line, then to chairs near the stage, ignoring the dancing women.

"Okay, Ted, I found a way for you to help someone, to do some good," Barney said, leading a scruffy guy toward him. "This is Walter, and Walter is homeless. And Walter would like a lap dance."

"Are you joking?" Ted asked, looking up at them.

"I never joke about the sublime art of burlesque entertainment," Barney said, making Cas snort in laughter.

"No, Barney, that's insane," Ted said, then turned to look at the guy. "Sir, would you like me to buy you a ticket to the buffet."

"No, I'm stuffed," the homeless guy said, patting his stomach. "Just a lap dance would be fine."

"Ted, Walter's been to three shelter dinners," Barney explained. "You know where he hasn't been? To heaven with Samantha," he gestured to the stripper who had just come up behind him. "Look, it's the one chance you've had all day to help someone in need. Now buy this man a lap dance."

"You said you wanted to see the joy in someone's eyes," Robin said, laughing.

"You know, I don't think I'm gonna watch," Ted said, taking money from his wallet. "Here you go, Walter. Happy Thanksgiving."

"Thank you so much," he said, turning to follow the stripper Samantha. "No really, thank you."

"Happy Thanksgiving, guys," Ted said, shaking his head as Barney sat back down in his chair.

"Thanksgiving in November. Weird," Robin said, shaking her head.

"Oh yeah, Canada has it in like, September or something, right?" Cas asked, nibbling some of the turkey from the buffet.

"October," Robin said.

"Weird," Cas said, shaking her head, then she turned to Barney. "I can't believe you would want to spend Thanksgiving here."

"My mom doesn't do Thanksgiving, and this is better than her house anyway," Barney said, giving the stripper some money. Cas shook her head. "Hey, it takes talent to be a stripper, you should appreciate them," he gestured to the girl on the stage in front of him.

"It'd be easy to become a stripper," Robin said. "You just take your clothes off." Cas nodded in agreement.

"That is not all it is," Barney said, fully upset now. Cas laughed.

"You're right," she said. "You have to have some tiny ability to move in time to whatever song is playing. It shouldn't be too hard since all these songs have the same tempo." Barney huffed out, sitting back in his chair, then he grinned.

"I bet that neither of you could become a stripper," he said, leaning forward.

"Of course not," Robin said. "I have standards." Cas nodded.

"If you could go through one whole night of doing what they do, I'll pay you $500," Barney said, smirking. Cas glanced at Robin with an eyebrow raised in question. Robin shook her head.

"No dice," Robin said.

"One thousand then," Barney said smugly.

"I'll do it," Cas said, grinning. She reached out to shake Barney's hand.

"If you can't you owe me the same," he said.

"Fine," she said, then waited until he was grinning before continuing. She lifted a hand in front of her and pretended to look at her nails. "But just so you know, I was in gymnastics for fifteen years and I take weekly kick boxing classes, daily runs, and twice a week I take a dance aerobics class at my gym."

"Ha," Robin said, laughing as she high fives Cas. "You are totally winning this."

"That's cheating!" Barney said, once again pouting.

"No it's not. You made a bet, and shook on it," Cas said smugly. "It's your own fault for not knowing all the information first."

"She's right," Ted said, laughing now.

Barney spent the rest of the night pouting while Robin and Cas talked about where she could go to be a stripper for a night. When Robin and Ted decided they had been there long enough to repay Barney, they left him there and went back to Ted's for a beer, Cas following them too. The night, though spent at a strip club, had greatly improved Cas's mood, and she went home in good spirits.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

Cas finished her notes with a sigh and looked at the clock above the tv. It wasn't too late, only 9:30… maybe the group was still at the bar. She stood and stretched, sick of working so much. She needed a break. That decided, she grabbed her coat and keys and left the apartment, locking the door behind her.

"Robin!" She said in surprise, nearly crashing into the woman as she came up the steps from the bar. "You leaving?"

"Yeah, I've got a date," she said smiling.

"Nice! Have fun," Cas said, seeing that Robin was sort of in a hurry. She waved, then walked down the stairs and pulled the bar door open, stepping up to the bar to order a drink before heading over to the booth. Barney stood and walked over to a different table, so she slid into the seat he had just vacated. She didn't say anything as Ted slid into the booth next to her and watched Barney, his face expectant.

"Oh, daddy's back," Ted said jokingly as Barney came back over to them and sat in the chair Ted had just vacated. "See, if you'd taken a moment to think about that-"

"Then Daddy wouldn't have gotten this seven-digit Father's Day card from Amy, huh?" Barney said, waving a napkin in front of Teds face.

"That worked?" Ted asked. "I hate the world."

"Ted, your problem is all you do is think, think, think," Barney said, a hand on Ted's shoulder. "I'm teaching you how to do, do, do."

"Ha. Doo-doo," Marshall commented, laughing. Cas shook her head.

"Totally," Barney said, nodding.

"So, I think a lot," Ted said, shrugging. "I happen to have a very powerful brain. It can't be helped."

"Oh yes it can," Barney said, sliding a tray of shots over to him.

"Interesting," Marshall said, leaning forward.

"Ted, I believe you and I met for a reason," Barney said, smirking. "It's like the universe was saying, hey, Barney, there's this dude, he's pretty cool but it's your job to make him awesome. Your brain screws you up, Ted. It gets in the way. It happened with Robin, it happened with half-boob. And it's gonna keep on happening until you power down that bucket of neuroses inebriation-style." He hit the table at the end of his speech, as though that was the end of the debate.

"So, what?" Ted asked, rolling his eyes. "You want me to do a shot?"

"Oh no," Barney said, pushing the shots closer to him. "I want you to do five shots."

"Oooh, more interesting," Marshall said, watching eagerly.

"Barney, I think you've officially-" Ted began.

"No, don't think," Barney interrupted. "Do."

"Ted, he's right," Marshall said, nodding. "You overthink. Maybe you should over drink." Marshall and Barney started chanting quietly, "drink drink drink."

"Ah, Lily, will you tell these guys how stupid they're being?" Ted said, pushing the shots away from him as Lily approached the table.

"Guys, you are being immature and moronic," Lily began, then turned back to Ted. "And drink, drink, drink!" She chanted. Cas laughed, then joined in. Ted glared at them, then took a shot. They all cheered.

"Let me tell you something about this brain, OK?," Ted began, then threw back a second shot as the table continued to chant softly. "Even alcohol cannot stop this brain." He paused to take another shot. "This brain, dear mortals, is no ordinary brain," he took the fourth shot. "This is a superbrain." He tapped the side of his head then too the last shot. They all cheered and laughed. "This brain is unstoppable. This brain…" He trailed off, staring into space as Carl the bartender came over to the table.

"And how did you guys like the shots?" He asked, picking up the tray of empty glasses.

"I drank all five, bitch," Ted said, slurring the words only a little.

"I love drunk Ted!" Marshall said, laughing.

"Marshall thinks you're a vampire," Ted told Carl. Marshall laughed awkwardly, then gave Ted a look. Cas giggled.

"If he pukes, one of you guys cleans it up," Carl said, then left the table.

"No dibs," Lily said, putting a finger against her nose.

"Nope," Cas echoed, touching her own nose.

"Oh," Marshall said, touching his nose quickly.

"No….Dammit," Barney said, being the last one to touch his nose. He huffed.

"How quickly you all forget," Ted began, grinning like an idiot as he stood from the booth. "I haven't puked since high school. I am vomit-free since ninety-three. Vomit free since ninety-three. That's funny. I'm funny." He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket.

"Who are you calling?" Lily asked, concerned.

"Robin," he said, smiling.

"Oh, bad idea," Marshall said.

"No, no, that's a great idea," Barney said, grinning. "That's the whole point of getting drunk. You do things you would never do in a million years if you were sober."

"Says every girl you've ever slept with," Lily said, holding her hand up for a high five. Cas nearly spit out her drink laughing, and held her hand up for a high five when Barney didn't give her one. He huffed again.

"Hello Robin, it's Ted," Ted said into the phone moving to lean against the back of the booth. "Hello Robin, it's Ted," he repeated, and Cas laughed. "Robin, have I ever told you that I'm vomit-free since ninety-three?" He said, ignoring Lily shaking her head. "I don't say this enough, but you're a great woman, and a great reporter. You should be on 60 Minutes," he gasped excitedly. "You should be one of the minutes." He paused to listen to her. "Yeah, and I disagree with Barney," he said, looking at Barney for half a second. "Just 'cause this guy is spending a lot of money doesn't mean you have to put out. Take it slow, Robin, take it slow. Slow. Slow," he drew out the last word until Lily took the phone from him.

"Wow, right, that's why we don't do shots," Marshall said, laughing.

"Friends don't let friends drink and dial," Lily said.

"I need that phone back," Ted protested, reaching for the phone.

"You'll get this back at the end of class," Lily said, shaking her head. Barney reached over and grabbed the phone from her.

"Ding, class dismissed. Here you go, kid, you call whoever you want," he said, handing the phone back to Ted.

"Thank you kind sir," Ted said, then began to walk toward the back of the bar. "At least someone appreciates the fact that I'm doing and not thinking. And now I don't think I won't not go to the bathroom."

"Was that necessary?" Lily asked as he walked away. "He is not making smart decisions."

"Exactly. It's like, what's he gonna do next. I don't know, but I want to find out," Barney said, grinning. A song came on from the jukebox then, and Marshall groaned and shook his head.

"Cheap Trick? Oh Ted," he said, turning to see Ted. He was on the phone again, singing into it actually. He got through the first verse, then jumped up onto a table.

"I love everyone in this bar," Ted shouted, then kept singing for about three seconds.

"And we love you, drunk Ted," Marshall replied, lifting his glass in a fake toast. Ted sung the next line, then fell off the table.

"We had better get him to bed," Lily said, standing. She and Marshall went over to help him up, then helped him out of the bar.

"What an idiot," Barney said, going up to the bar. Cas followed so she could get another drink, this time opting for beer. She stood next to Barney as he surveyed the room for a few minutes, then nudged him as Ted came back through the doors.

"I'm back baby doll!' He shouted, and the people nearest him gave a cheer as he walked over to them.

"Hey, hey hey hey, he rallies," Barney said, grinning. "And the night begins now," they high-fived. "All right, game face on. Carl, three more. All right, all right, what do we think of this one?" Barney said, facing Ted toward a girl sitting alone at a table.

"Just two more," Cas said to Carl as he prepared more shots.

"I think-" Ted began.

"Ehhh!" Barney said, making a sound like a buzzer. "Trick question, no thinking. You know what time it is? It's do o'clock. Let's ride." He led Ted over to the table and sat down. Cas laughed when Ted kept walking past the table to the back of the bar where he leaned against a wall and pulled out his phone again. She followed Barney over to him.

"You're calling Robin," Barney said, frowning.

"I'm calling Robin," Ted repeated in a much happier voice.

"Ted, as your mentor and spiritual guide, I forbid you from calling her," Barney said, closing the phone. Ted opened it again.

"Oh yeah? What you gonna do?" He asked.

"If you complete that call, I will set your coat on fire," Barney said, lifting up a lighter and flicking it on.

"You're bluffing," Ted said, then turned around to dial. "Hello, Robin, it's Ted," he said a few seconds later. Barney held the lighter against the bottom of Ted's coat and Cas was just a second too slow in pushing his arm away. Ted's coat caught and he screamed and whirled around. Cas and Barney managed to tow him up to the bar and Barney grabbed the beverage gun and sprayed Ted off, putting out the fire.

"Okay, that's enough for tonight, time for bed," Barney said. "Bye Cas," he said, helping Ted to the door of the bar. She sighed and sat on a stool at the bar, sipping her beer.

It was almost half an hour later when Ted came back in.

"I'm back, baby doll!," he shouted. By this point there were only about four people in the bar and Carl had called for the last call five minutes before. Cas shook her head. "And I am gonna throw up." He walked towards the bathrooms.

"Sorry about him," Cas said to Carl. "If he makes a mess I'll clean it up."

"Don't worry about it, you guys are my best customers. Most of the time," Carl said. Cas laughed and finished off her beer, then stood, wondering if she should go find Ted, but he came back out and sat at the bar and began talking to her, so she sat back down too.

"Cas, did you know the word karaoke is Japanese for empty orchestra?" He said, souring his words a little. "Isn't that hauntingly beautiful?" He turned to Carl and grabbed someone's half empty glass of beer from nearby. "Are you a vampire?"

"I am cutting you off," Carl said, taking the cup from his hands. "Go home and get some sleep, Ted."

"Yeah, sun's gonna come up soon," Ted said suspiciously. "Wouldn't want to be around for that, would we?" He sighed then turned back to Cas. "Hey, how easy do you think it'll be to sneak into the zoo? I have to see some penguins, like right now."

"Give me your arm," Cas said, pulling a marker out of her purse. Ted rested his arm on the counter and she pushed his sleeve up and began to write. "This way, if you pass out in the gutter…" She continued writing. Ted giggled.

"That tickles," he said. Cas ignored him.

"Someone will call me and I will come get you," she said, finishing her number on his arm.

"Thanks Cas," He said, then sighed. "We can't just be friends, we're attracted to each other and we both know it."

"Um, what," Cas asked, leaning back in her seat.

"Me and Robin. Me and Robin, I have to make one more call," Ted said, and Cas let out a breath of relief as Ted pulled out his phone again.

"Yeah, this'll go good," Carl said, watching them.

"Hey, it's me again," Ted said into the phone. Cas sighed. "Look, who are we kidding? You and I are both attracted to each other. We're young, we're drunk, half of us anyway. And we only get one life, so why don't you come over to my apartment and we'll think of something stupid to do together? Really? Great. Wait, really? Great." He hung up the phone and turned back to her. "I'm going home now," he said, grinning.

"Can you make it by yourself or do you need help?" She asked.

"I'm fine," he said, then stumbled out the door. Cas pulled out her wallet and left money on the bar for the drinks she had consumed, then went back to her apartment, exhausted. She usually didn't stay up this late, but she was really hoping for something exciting to happen to take her mind off work. And while Ted getting completely wasted and making a fool of himself was entertaining, the night had seemed a little tame to her. She changed into her pajamas and crawled into bed, setting her phone on the bedside table.

She woke up the next morning to her phone ringing.

"Hello?" She asked, not opening her eyes.

"Hello?" She recognized Ted's voice. "Who is this?"

"You called me, shouldn't you know who you're calling?" She asked, trying not to laugh.

"It's Ted," he said.

"I know," she replied. "This is Cas."

"It's Cas," she heard him say away from the phone. He must have been talking to the others. "Uh, could you tell me what happened last night?" She laughed and explained the story all the way through. "Is that all?"

"Oh my god," he said. "It's Robin. It's Robin in there," he said, again away from the phone. "Thanks Cas," he said, then hung up. She shook her head and leaned back against the pillows for a few minutes before realizing that she wasn't going to be able to fall back asleep. She got up with a sigh and sat in front of her coffee table to go over more of her notes.

* * *

It was New Years Eve. The first one Cas had ever had friends to hang out with. She had spent the entire week looking forward to tonight, and also nearly the entire day getting ready for it. She had found the perfect little dark blue dress to wear, and a cute black half jacket to go with it. She had gone all out on her hair, curling it meticulously and then braiding tiny little sections of it and pinning them back, and she was wearing makeup. In her opinion, she looked hot. She was ready to go at 8:45, and left her apartment, her tiny clutch purse in her hands, to see the others, minus Ted, standing out on the curb, waiting for something.

"Heeey!" Lily said, hugging her as Cas came over. Cas hugged her back then looked her over.

"Nice shoes, I love them," she said, grinning.

"I know right," Lily said, then turned at the sound of an approaching car. All of them stared in surprise.

"Yeah, that's right...a limo," Ted said, standing through the large sunroof of a sleek blank limo. They all climbed in when it came to a stop, Cas sitting backwards against the division of the drivers seat and the back, Lily and Marshall on the side seat, and Barney, Ted, and Robin in the back.

"Oh, man, Ted, this is great," Robin said, looking around them. There was a little mini fridge and a rack of glasses along one side, and enough room for all of them to sit comfortably, unlike their many cab rides.

"Okay, people, let's talk strategy," Ted said, taking out a green index card. "Last new years, we went our separate ways, and it sucked. This year we party together or not at all. Now, I sifted through your party submission and I narrowed them down to these five." He held up the card.

"Question?" Barney asked, half raising his hand.

"Yes, Barney, your submissions were received and no, we will not be attending any parties in your pants," Ted said without pause.

"But you enjoyed the e-vite, right?" Barney asked. Ted shook his head, smiling a little. "That was an actual picture of my pants."

"Yeah," Lily said sarcastically. Cas laughed.

"We will hit all five parties before midnight," Ted began, ignoring Barney. "And then narrow them down to one, the most awesome party in New York City and that is where we will ring, nay rock, in the new year."

"All right, and party number one that's where we get to meet Mary Beth?" Lily asked, looking at Ted.

"Mary Beth?" Robin asked, looking around at them. Cas shrugged.

"Oh, she works in my office," Ted explained. "She seems like she might be into me. She's always finding reasons to hug me. So tonight…" He trailed off suggestively.

"People often ask me "Barney, how is it that you're so psyched so much of the time?"" Barney began.

"By who?" Lily interrupted. "Who asks you that?"

"And the answer is right here…" He said, ignoring her. "My own, personal "get psyched" mix. Now, people often think a good mix should rise and fall, but people are wrong. It should be all rise, baby. Now prepare yourselves for an audio journey into the white-hot center of adrenaline. Bam." Cas jumped as a loud, upbeat song began to play.

"It's working," Lily said, smiling as she sort of danced to the music.

"I am definitely getting psyched," Ted added, nodding his head.

"Oh, God. I'm reaching dangerous levels of psychage. Must do robot," Marshall said, then began doing a pretty bad robot. Cas shook her head.

"Let's do this!" Barney said.

"Yes! Let's!" Ted said. "Oh, driver?" He called, and the division behind Cas's head began to lower. She scooted to the side of the seat and kicked her legs up so she wasn't in the way.

"Ranjit!" Barney exclaimed excitedly. "Dude, you're driving a limo now. That's awesome."

"I've moved up in the world," the driver said, his accent heavy as usual.

"How do you guys know each other?" Robin asked, looking between Ted and the driver.

"Oh, we rode in his cab one time. It's a long story," Ted said.

"Hey, what are we waiting for?" Barney said, grinning. "We got five parties to hit, and three hours to do it."

"Oh, I wish I could come with you guys but Derek should be coming by any minute to pick me up," Robin said apologetically. She opened her door and stepping out. "Oh, I'll miss you guys. Have fun," she said.

"Bye." Lily and Cas called.

"See ya next year. Go get 'em," Ted said, and Robin shut the door.

"Well, this kind of sucks," Lily said, half pouting.

"Okay, nobody get down," Ted said. "We knew this going in. We're a man down. That just means we're gonna have to party that much harder. Ranjit! Party number one."

"Party number one!" The driver repeated, pulling out into traffic.

"Party number one!" They all cheered back.

They arrived at the party, having to shout over the music they could hear and the other people talking on the streets, agreeing to meet back there in half an hour if they got split up. Cas grinned and followed them into the building filled with people. Marshall headed straight for the food table, Lily following. Ted spotted a girl he knew, probably Mary-Beth, or whatever her name was from work, and Barney spotted someone, probably a chick, and wandered off, so Cas was by herself, wandering around the room. She found the bar and tried to order, but there were too many people in the way. She sighed, then, without overthinking it, grabbed one of the drinks the bartender put out on the bar and turned around. No one called after her, or noticed, so she kept walking, sipping the drink through the straw. She couldn't tell exactly what it was. It sort of tasted like a Long Island Iced Tea, but it was blue, and a little sour. She grinned and drank almost half of it without stopping. Today was a good day to get drunk, and this drink was doing a great job. Only five minutes and she already felt tipsy. A little more than tipsy actually. She moved into the crowd, holding her drink above her head as she danced to the music, grinning. She sipped more of her drink as she danced, finishing it off before she even noticed. She danced over to a table and set the glass down, then turned around to go back out to the floor, but was whirled back around by someone grabbing her arm. She didn't stumble, which surprised her a little, given how dizzy she felt.

"Were do you think you are going?" Barney asked, pulling her towards the wall. "It's been half an hour, time to go."

"Nope," she said, shaking her head, then she giggled.

"Are you drunk?" Barney asked, sounding impressed.

"Yep," she said, grinning. "So drunk."

"Nice," he said, holding up a hand for a high five. She gave it to him. "Now lets go."

"Were you only friends with me so you could sleep with me?" She asked, still grinning for some reason. He turned back toward her, his mouth opening then closing.

"Uh, what?" He asked, both eyebrows raised.

"I said, 'Were you only friends with me so-'" She began.

"Of course not, I'm still friends with you, lets go," he said, tugging her arm. She pulled it from his grip and laughed a little.

"Then why aren't we friends anymore?" She asked, leaning against the table a little.

"We are friends, I just said-" he began, but she interrupted him.

"No we aren't. You used to come over all the time, and now I only see you at the bar, and you don't even talk to me then," she said quietly, no longer smiling. She looked down.

"We are still friends," he said, grabbing her arm to pull her along. She sighed and shook her head, following him a few steps, until he dropped her arm and she turned around, heading back to the dance floor. He didn't notice.

"Cas!" She heard Ted yell from nearby. "Come on, we're leaving."

"No thanks," she said when he was close enough to hear.

"What do you mean no? We have four more parties to hit!" He said excitedly.

"Yeah, no I'm staying," she said, frowning.

"Why?" He asked. She looked up at him and smiled softly.

"Ted, how would you feel if Robin were here tonight?" She asked.

"Great, the more the merrier," he said.

"Okay, and what if Robin and Derek were both here tonight, and you had to watch them doing that, all night, how would you feel then?" She asked, gesturing over his shoulder to Barney, who was making out with a brown haired girl near the door. He turned and looked, then turned back.

"It would suck, but Robin's my friend, so I'd deal with it," he said, his hands in his pockets. She smiled again.

"I'm not good at dealing," she said, then turned back into the crowded dance floor. "Have fun tonight." She made her way to the center of the floor and melded in with the dancing crowd, and that's the last thing she remembered.

* * *

She opened her eyes in an unfamiliar room, and groaned as her head spun. She closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead, then sat up, clutching the sheets over herself. She looked around and had to stop herself from gasping. There was someone else in the bed with her, his face turned away from her. She moved quietly, finding her clothes from the night before and dressing quickly, and grabbing her coat off the doorknob and pulling the door open. She winced as it squeaked and froze as she heard movement from the bed.

"Cas?"

"Barney?" She asked in a high voice, turning around to face him as he stood. She turned back around immediately when she realized he was naked. "Oh great. Just perfect." She said, pulling the door open. She found her purse on the coffee table, recognizing the apartment now, and was almost to the door when he came after her.

"Wait," he said, and she paused, hating herself. She turned back around, keeping her head down. "Do you want breakfast?"

"You don't do breakfast," she said quietly.

"I know, but," he said, then huffed. She looked up. "I'm sorry I've been a jerk. I shouldn't have left last time. I'm trying to fix that."

"So what? You are offering me breakfast so I won't think you are a jerk?" She asked angrily.

"Yes, well no," he said, frowning. "Will you just eat breakfast with me?" He said. "Please?" He added in a softer tone. She hesitated, then sighed, hating herself even more for not being able to say no to him.

"Fine." She sat at the table and he looked up, surprised, then looked to the kitchen. He pulled open the fridge, which she could see was empty, then the cupboards, which were also empty.

"Uuuh," he said, turning back around with a sheepish look on his face. She couldn't help it, she giggled. He grinned.

"Lets go out for breakfast," he suggested.

"No thanks," she said, looking down at her clothes as she stood. She could just imagine how horrible her hair was. Not to mention her makeup. He frowned. "It's just, I look like crap."

"No you don't, you look beautiful," he said, coming over to grab her hands. She looked at him, surprised, her heart thudding against her chest. She pushed him away.

"Look, its fine, we're good. I don't think you are a jerk," she said, taking a step back.

"I'm not just doing this because I don't want you to think I'm a jerk," he said impatiently, taking a step forward. She took another one back.

"Then why are you doing it?" Cas asked, stepping back again as he stepped toward her. "If you are trying to fix the last time, don't. It's fine, I don't," she swallowed, her mouth suddenly dry. "I don't care." She managed to get out.

"I'm doing this because I like you," he said, coming toward her again. She took a step back, and ran into the wall.

"But?" She asked, looking down at her feet. He took a step forward again, coming uncomfortably close to her.

"But I don't do relationships," he said softly. She turned her head to the side, looking away from him as he ran his hands up her bare arms. She shivered as goose bumps rose on her skin. He rested one hand against her neck, the other against her cheek, turning her head to look at him. She met his eyes, then looked down again.

"Can we please just be friends, like normal people?" She asked softly as he drew her face up again to look at him.

"Normal people don't do things like this with their friends," he said quietly as she shivered again. His hand slid down her neck. Her eyes were half closed and she was leaning into him without realizing it, standing up on her toes to be closer and hating herself again for the effect he had on her. Her heart was hammering against her chest, and she was sure he could feel her pulse in the veins of her throat. He leaned in closer, his breath warm against her cheek. Her hands came up to his hips as he leaned down toward her, his lips brushing hers lightly, then again harder. She sighed and relaxed into the kiss, responding eagerly. He pushed her up against the wall and she dropped her purse and coat on the floor, reaching up to tangle her hands in his hair as his hands moved to her waist. He kissed her again, and she jumped up, wrapping her legs around his waist. He supported her, hands under her thighs, and carried her back to his bedroom, kicking the door closed behind them.

* * *

"Okay, this can't happen again," she said as they both laid in his bed, catching their breath.

"Why not?" He asked, smirking as he leaned up on one elbow and turned towards her.

"Because… it just can't," she said, frowning. He chuckled. "We should just be… friends."

"We are," he said, grinning. "Friends, who occasionally have sex." She reached over to smack him on the arm, but her heart wasn't behind it.

"Friends with benefits," he said. "It's the best deal there is. Sex that everyone enjoys and no emotions involved." She glanced over at him, frowning.

"No emotions," she repeated. He nodded. "Well," she said slowly. "I guess that's fine then."

"Wait, really?" He said, grinning. She sighed, her chest aching, but she couldn't say no to the only part of him he was willing to give her.

"Yeah, sure," she grinned at him. "But can you not tell… the group, I'd rather not have them… you know, interfering like they usually do."

"Obviously," he said, nodding. She stood to find her dress and started pulling it on.

"How did I get here yesterday? The last thing I remember is you all leaving, and I stayed at the first party," she asked, brushing the creases out of her dress.

"Oh, funny story, so…" he explained the night from after the first party as he pulled on his clothes. "And then at about fifteen minutes after midnight, you called me and yelled at me about how much of a jerk I was," he said. She winced. Had she said anything else? "And then after the limo dropped everyone off at Ted's, Ranjit drove me back to the first party, I found you, and tried taking you home, but you refused, so we came here, and then you kissed me and one thing led to another, and here we are."

"I'm so sorry," she said, but couldn't help but laugh. "I called you a jerk?"

"And some other things, all giving me the same impression," he said, frowning.

"Ah, sorry," she said again. "I don't think you are a jerk," she said. "Most of the time." He looked up and made a face. She laughed. "Well, if you still want breakfast you can come over to my apartment. I actually have groceries."

"Fine," he said, straightening his tie.

"I can't believe you don't have food here. What do you eat?" She asked, walking back into the living room, him following.

"I don't eat here, I always go out," he said, shrugging. She laughed.

"That's not healthy," she said, grabbing her coat from the floor and shrugging it on, then grabbing her purse. She fished out her phone and used the reflective screen as a mirror to make sure she looked okay. She frowned, seeing her hair. She patted it down with one hand, then gave up and twisted it into a bun at the back of her head, leaving the pins in it to deal with later. At least her makeup looked okay. She followed Barney down to the street, then into the cab back to her place, half hating herself for having no will power, and half really happy that they had come to this agreement.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

Cas practically threw down her notes as the clock hit seven. She had barely taken five minutes to herself in the last three weeks, and she was sick of working. She'd had to turn away new students who came to her because she simply had no time to see them all, and she hated knowing there was someone out there that she could have helped, but didn't. She needed a drink. It had been about three weeks since she'd had one of those too. She hadn't even stepped foot in the bar, and she had almost no idea what was going on with anyone in the group, since she had only seen them in passing. Lily said Ted had a new girlfriend, Victoria, and everyone seemed to like her, but Cas had yet to meet her. She stood and stretched. It was a Friday night, she could at least have one beer with the gang, besides, she had gone over most of her notes for Monday already, since Monday was a half school day, all the afternoon classes were cancelled, which meant all her afternoon appointments were also cancelled. She grabbed her coat and purse, not bothering to change out of the slacks and blouse she had worn to work that morning. She ran into Ted as he was leaving the bar.

"Hey!" She said, smiling. "Leaving already?"

"Yeah, I have a date with Victoria tonight," Ted said, tucking his hands into his pockets.

"Oh, exciting," she said, smirking suggestively at him. He rolled his eyes. "Is everyone else still here?"

"Lily and Marshall went on some weekend trip, for their nine year anniversary," he said, shrugging. "But I think Robin and Barney are staying for a while."

"Cool, well, I'll see you later then," she said. "Have fun on your date."

"I will," he said, then disappeared up the steps to his apartment as she opened the bar door. Robin was sitting at the bar, waiting for a drink, so Cas took the seat next to her.

"Hey, where have you been? I feel like I haven't seen you in forever," Robin said, smiling.

"I've just been busy with work," Cas said, shrugging. Carl the bartender set a martini in front of Robin, and a beer in front of Cas. "Are you sticking around for a while? I really need a break from work," Cas said, then stopped as someone approached Robin from behind.

"Hundred dollars says when you turn around, I say "wow."," Cas recognized the voice at the same time Robin did, and they turned around together. "Damnit!"

"Barney, this is the third time you've hit on me by accident," Robin said, rolling her eyes.

"It's one of the many risks of the blind approach," Barney said, leaning against the bar on Robin's other side. "It's usually a two-man operation where Ted signals that the target is hot. But Ted's too busy being in a lesbian relationship." Cas snorted with laughter.

"Why don't you just check out the girl's reflection in the bar mirror?" Robin said, pointing to the thin strip of mirror behind the many bottles.

"You can't just…" Barney began, but then turned to look in the mirror. "Wow!"

"Hey? What's taking so long?" A woman called from the corner booth. Robin glanced at her.

"I have to go," Robin said, standing.

"Not so fast, Scherbatsky," Barney said. "I like the way you think. That mirror thing. Simple. Elegant. Okay, limited-time offer: I need a "bro" for my bro-ings on about town. How would you like to be said bro?"

"Well, as tempting as that sounds, I'm hanging out with my friend who just got dumped," Robin said, gesturing to the girl in the booth. Cas rolled her eyes. "She really needs some support…" Robin trailed off as she looked at her friend, who was now making out with a random guy. "Or a stranger's tongue down her throat. That seems healthy. All right. Guess I'm in." Robin said, then glanced at Cas, looking a little guilty.

"Oh I'm good, I'm just going to head home," Cas said, a smile on her face. "I have some more stuff to go over for work," she said. Barney nodded to her, then told Robin where to meet him in an hour. Cas sipped her beer, her eyes on the bar, trying to ignore the painful feeling in her chest. She sighed and shook her head.

"Cas? You okay?" Robin asked from beside her as she finished off her martini.

"What? Yeah, of course," Cas said, lifting her head.

"Well it's just that I called your name like four times," Robin said, raising a brow.

"Oh, sorry, I'm just really tired I guess," Cas said, smiling again.

"Okay, well I'll see you later okay? Go home and sleep," Robin said, setting her empty glass on the bar.

"Yeah, that sounds like a good idea," Cas said, standing. She walked out with Robin, and they split ways at the street, Robin calling a cab and Cas going back to her apartment.

She sat down in front of her notes again, but she couldn't focus on them. She liked this job, but she had taken on more than she could handle. A lot of her patients came to her because, as college freshmen, it was their first time away from home for an extended period of time, and they were homesick. With time those ones wouldn't need to see her anymore, they just needed to get used to being away from home, and maybe next year she could just keep her older patients. She sighed and put her head down on the table, using her arms as a pillow. She knew it was a little sad to go sit at the bar alone and drink all night, but that's all she felt like doing just now.

She left her coat over the chair, then tucked her ID and her credit card into her pocket and left the apartment, stepping in to the cold air outside. Back at the bar she gave her card over to Carl to open a tab and ordered a vodka cranberry. She stayed up at the bar even though the gangs usual booth was empty. She listened as random guys came up to the bar to hit on the other girls who were there alone, surprised that some of their line actually worked. No one came up to her. She wasn't sure if it was because she was still wearing her work clothes, which were very modest, and her hair was pulled back into a tight bun, or if it was because she didn't look as easy or drunk as these other girls. Or maybe it was because she had an unsettling personality, just as her old 'sort-of' friends used to say. She moved to the corner of the bar so she could see the whole room, and leaned against the wall. Maybe it was because she was unattractive. Of course half of the girls at this bar were hotter than her, but she didn't think she was unattractive. She looked down at herself, then unbuttoned her dressy sweater. The blouse underneath it wasn't unflattering, but it wasn't a tight shirt like the other girls here were wearing. She sighed and finished off her drink, gesturing to Carl for another.

She wasn't sure how long she sat there. She eventually gave up watching the other people around her, focusing on her drink. She'd probably had at least four of them by now, but her head was still clear as ever. Of course the one time she actually really wanted to get drunk, she couldn't.

She didn't notice Robin and Barney coming in until Robin spoke. She had been looking down, stirring her drink with the little straw, and resting her head on her folded arm. She looked up as she recognized the voice.

"Playing laser tag really takes me back," Robin was saying to Barney as they waited for Carl to hand them their drinks. "You know what game I really miss? Battleship. I've never lost a game."

"Neither have I," Barney said. His back was to her, but she could hear the smugness in his voice. "Of course I cheat."

"Oh, yeah, me, too," Robin said, grinning. "The trick is to bend the aircraft carrier so it makes an L."

"Ah. I always just stacked the ships on top of each other," Barney said, sipping his scotch.

"Nice," Robin said, then turned to accept her drink from Carl. "You know, we should have a cheaters grudge match. I think I still have a…" She trailed off as she turned her back towards Cas as well. "Hello. Target acquired. Hottie by the jukebox." She nodded to a dark haired girl across the bar.

"Ooh, good eye, Scherbatsky," Barney said. "I got someone for you. Two o'clock, blue shirt."

"That's a woman," Robin said.

"Oh, my mistake," Barney said looking back at the woman. "Or is it?"

"Let's just focus on your target," Robin said. Cas lowered her head again, not sure she wanted to talk to them right now. She felt like crap.

"Right," Barney said, turning back to the girl and straightening his tie. He made to walk over to her, but Robin stopped him.

"Yeah, I got this one," she said, walking over to her. Cas looked over to see what was happening, but she was too far away to hear what Robin was saying. Within two minutes the other girl was coming over to talk to Barney. She led him away, to a table, and sat with him while Robin headed back to the bar with her drink. Cas wanted to leave, but she didn't want to have to walk past Robin to do it, because that would lead to conversation, and Cas just couldn't deal with that right now.

"Hey," she looked up as Barney began talking to Robin again.

"Hey," Robin said, smiling.

"Let's get out of here. Let's go somewhere else," Barney said, and Cas's eyes widened, she knew that line. Was he hitting on Robin now?

"What happened?" Robin asked, glancing at the girl Barney had been chatting up.

"Eh, I sometimes like to do a little catch and release," Barney said, straightening his tie.

"But why?" Robin asked, tilting her had to the side.

"Leave no man behind," Barney said, reaching past Robin to set his empty glass on the bar. "Either we all score or no one scores."

"Right on," Robin said, smiling up at him. "Hey, you want to go play Battleship?"

"Hit!" Barney said, and walked towards the door. Robin stayed behind for half a second to nod to the girl at the table as though saying "Ha, I win."

Cas watched them leave, then stood to get her card back from Carl and go home. She laid on her bed in the dark for a while, trying not to let herself cry. She was not the type of person who cried about stupid things, like Barney hitting on other people. She also wasn't the type of person to get crushes, or act like a stupid teenage girl about them. No matter how hard she tried, a few tears still leaked out of her eyes and ran down her cheeks. She closed her eyes and turned over to bury her head in her pillow, angry at herself for being this stupid.

She wasn't asleep when her phone rang, but it still took her almost four rings to realize that someone was calling her. She reached into her pocket and pulled out her phone.

"Hello?" She asked softly. Her voice was a little scratchy from her impromptu crying session.

"Oh good, you're awake. I'm coming over," Barney said, then hung up the phone. She sat up quickly, wiping her face. If he was coming over this late it was only for one thing. She sighed, half tempted to call him back and tell him no, but she stood and went to the bathroom to try to make it look like she wasn't just crying. Five minutes later, she was sitting in front of her notes as she waited for him.

* * *

She was woken the next morning by her phone ringing again.

"Hello?" She whispered, not wanting to wake up Barney. She could feel him breathing beside her, and she smiled a little.

"Cas?" It was Lily. "Get dressed, we are going out for breakfast with Robin," she said. Cas sighed.

"Lily, it's like 7 in the morning," she whispered, glancing at the clock above the tv.

"Why are you whispering?" Lily asked.

"No reason," Cas whispered quickly. "I'll be there in five." She hung up the phone, then got up to find some jeans and a t-shirt to wear. She dressed quickly, grabbing yesterdays clothes from the floor as she went, then ran to the bathroom to fix her hair and makeup, straightening up as she went. She glanced at Barney for a moment, wondering if she should wake him up, but decided against it. She slid her shoes on and threw on a sweater, then grabbed her purse and left, locking the door behind her.

She met Lily on the street as the short red head was on her way to Cas's apartment.

"Hey," Cas said, smiling. "Why are we having breakfast with Robin so early?"

"Dunno," Lily said, shrugging. "She called me and asked to hang out." They got a taxi, Lily giving them the address of the cafe Robin was meeting them at. They saw her as soon as they walked in, and slid into the seats across from her.

"Hey," Cas said, smiling at her.

"Hey," Robin replied. "So last night I hung out with Barney," she began, and told them about her night, going to the cigar bar then playing laser tag, then going back to her apartment. "And he thought that me inviting him upstairs to play battleship was code for sex." She laughed, and Cas smiled bitterly. "So anyway, then we sat down to play battleship, the actual game, and he realized that I like Ted. And I don't know what to do now, he said he won't tell, but what if he does?" By then they were halfway through their meals, and Cas just looked down at her plate, using her fork to push the food around. "And Barney made some good points," Robin continued, and Cas looked up. "He said it made sense to be with him because we both think the marriage commitment thing's a drag. We both want something casual and fun. And we clearly get along really well. And he is right, I do hate the commitment thing," Cas looked down again, feeling a little nauseous. "And obviously, Ted wants commitment, so it wouldn't work anyway. And Barney even said he checked with Ted, and Ted said it was fine if Barney and I hooked up." Cas ignored the glances Lily was sending her way and scooped a forkful of egg into her mouth. It was cold now, but she needed something to do with her hands. "I guess I just didn't think Ted would move on so quickly." Robin sighed, then listened as Lily said something to sooth her.

Robin sighed. "I guess you're right. I just feel like an idiot," Robin said. Cas knew how she felt. Of course after getting rejected by Robin, Barney would come to her, because he knew she wouldn't say no. She sighed.

"Are you okay?" Robin asked. Cas didn't look up, not realizing Robin was talking to her. "Is she okay?" Robin asked, looking at LIily.

"Cas is in love with Barney," Lily said, then slapped a hand over her mouth.

"What? Oh my god, I'm so sorry," Robin said, as Cas looked up.

"No, no, no, no, no, I'm not in love with Barney," Cas said, shaking her head. "It's fine," she said. Lily gave her a look and she sighed. "It's just a… stupid crush or whatever," she sighed.

"Nothing happened I swear," Robin said, sounding panicked.

"Robin, seriously, it's fine, it's not like we are dating or anything," Cas said, laughing now at the look on her face. Robin let out a breath, glad that Cas wasn't upset. Lily shook her head and Cas slapped her arm. "Really guys, it's fine."

The rest of the meal passed with only light conversation, but Cas still felt like she was going to throw up. She needed to get over this stupid crush thing, it was getting ridiculous.

Barney was still asleep when Cas got home. She had half expected him to be gone, but it was still early, so she wasn't too surprised. She watched him for a few seconds, smiling softly at how peaceful he looked, then turned back and sat down at the table to go over more of her notes. She sat in silence for about ten minutes, the sighed and stood. She went to her desk and hunted down a pair of headphones, then plugged them into her phone and turned on some music to listen to as she worked. She lost track of time as she read and wrote, so when a hand touched her shoulder she jumped up with a tiny shriek of surprise, her hands brought up to shield her face.

"Calm down," Barney said, rolling his eyes. He was fully dressed, his hair in place and his tie straightened.

"Sorry," Cas said, lowering her arms and pulling out her headphones. "You scared me."

"I noticed," he said, smirking. She smacked his arm and sat back down, pulling a new stack of folders towards her. She expected Barney to make some sort of excuse to leave, but instead he sat down across from her and leaned forward on the table. She ignored him for a while, getting lost in her notes again.

"Can I take you out on a date?"

Cas looked up in surprise, not sure she had heard him correctly.

"Um, what now?" She asked, an eyebrow raised.

"Lily told me I have to take you out on a date," he said, shrugging. She sighed and looked down.

"No," she said, picking up her pen again and looking down at her papers.

"Why not?" He asked incredulously.

"Because I don't go out with people who only ask other people out because someone else told them to," she said, still focusing on her notes. "Also I don't date."

He huffed, but still didn't leave as she had expected him to. They were both silent for a few minutes.

"Want to go to lunch?" He asked, and she sighed again, setting down her pen.

"I just said-" she began but he shook his head.

"Not a date, Lily wants us to meet her for lunch. She said everyone else will be there too. Except Ted," he said.

"Fine," Cas said shortly, picking her pen back up.

"Let's go," Barney said, pushing his chair back.

"What, now?" She asked in surprise, looking up. She glanced at the clock and was shocked to see it was almost one. She hadn't realized how late it was getting. She stood and grabbed her coat off her chair, the grabbed her purse and followed Barney out to the street.

They rode to the restaurant in silence, but it wasn't awkward.

As they got to the restaurant, they met Lily, Marshall, and Robin in front and went in together.

"I'm glad you both came," Lily said to Cas as they looked over the menus. Cas wasn't really hungry, but she ordered some food anyway. "I feel like I haven't seen you in forever!" This she said louder so everyone could hear.

"I know," Cas said, sighing. "I've just been really busy with work and all."

She knew she shouldn't be, but she was very happy to see that Robin was pretty much ignoring Barney. She hadn't thought anything would happen there, but guys had a tendency to fall in love with Robin, Cas had noticed that over the last few months of knowing the woman.

They ordered their food and Cas zoned out as Marshall and Barney argued about something and Lily and Robin talked about a pair of shoes Robin had just gotten.

"So Cas," Lily began, glancing obviously at Barney. Cas sighed, just knowing Lily was about to start in on something that was bound to be awkward. "There's this guy who works in my school, you two would be so perfect together," Lily said. Cas smiled thinly. Lily was just trying to figure out if Cas was going on a date with Barney without actually asking them.

"No thanks Lily," Cas said, sipping her water.

"Aw why not? Are you dating someone else?" Lily asked, wriggling her eyebrows. Cas rolled her eyes.

"No," Cas said, and Lily frowned. "I don't date."

"Oh come on, he's a good guy," Lily said, and Cas wasn't sure if she was talking about her work friend, or Barney now. Cas rolled her eyes again.

"Look, Lily, thanks, but I'm not going on a date with whatever his name is," Cas said. By now the rest of the group was listening too, even though Cas had been talking quietly.

"Well why not?" Lily demanded, frowning.

"I don't go on dates," Cas said, really wishing she could accidentally spill water on Lily or something to make her shut up, but her water glass was on the other side of her plate.

"Like, ever?" Lily asked, frowning.

"Never," Cas said, glancing around at them. Even Marshall looked shocked, which almost made Cas laugh.

"You've never been on a date?" Lily asked in awe. Cas shook her head. "But… why not?" She repeated.

"Well I just never went during high school," she said, shrugging. "And then after my parents died I felt like I shouldn't date for a while." There was silence around the table for a moment.

"Your parents are dead?" Marshall finally asked.

"Uh, yeah," Cas said, not sure why everyone was so quiet. "Like ten years ago."

"But…" Lily began, frowning. "You said you were visiting them at Thanksgiving," she said. Cas frowned, thinking back over what she had said. She supposed she had never actually outright told anyone they were dead… she just assumed they had known.

"I go there every year to visit their graves. It's my moms favorite time of the year, so it feels appropriate to go then," she said, looking around the table. "Guys, its fine, it's not a big deal or anything. I just don't like dating."

"Okay," Lily said, and they all sat in silence for another few moments. "So, Robin, you were saying something about the shoes you just bought?" She said, trying to start the conversation back up. Robin glanced at her for a second, then launched back into the conversation she had been having with Lily, this time including Cas. Cas nodded along, half listening to them.

* * *

The next Friday night Cas arrived at the bar before everyone else did and ordered a drink, then sat alone in their normal booth. She hadn't seen any of them since their group lunch a week ago, and she wondered if they felt awkward around her now. In fact, she wasn't even sure if any of them would be at the bar tonight. She sipped her drink and sighed, using the little straw to stir it idly while she waited. Ted, surprisingly, was the first one there, without his girlfriend.

"Hey Ted," Cas said, smiling as he slid into the booth across from her.

"Hey Cas," Ted said, sipping his beer.

"Heeey!" Lily said, coming in to the bar next and sliding into the seat, Marshall right behind her. Cas half listened as Ted and Marshall started up a conversation about games. Robin and Barney arrived together, Robin sliding in next to Marshall as Barney grabbed a chair.

"So, as you all know, you voted me to be in charge of game night," Marshall began. "Sooo, I invented a new game. It's called "Marsh-gammon." It combines all the best features of all the best games... Candy Land, I Never, Pictionary."

"Backgammon, obviously," Robin added, laughing.

"No," Marshall said seriously, glaring around the table. "Backgammon sucks. I took the only good part of backgammon, the "gammon," and I left the rest of it in the trash where it belongs." He hit the table at the end of his rant, making them all jump a little.

"I'm so excited Victoria's coming," Lily said to change the subject.

"I'm going to go get another round," Robin said, standing. Cas looked up at her, feeling sorry for the woman. She was obviously in love with Ted.

"Okay, I want to lay down some ground rules for tonight," Ted began as soon as Robin was out of ear shot. "Barney, I actually like Victoria... a lot, so don't say anything embarrass- Don't say anything." He said, then turned to Lily and Marshall. "And guys, I haven't exactly told Victoria that I used to have a kind of thing for Robin, so we you could just avoid the…"

"Well, well, well," Barney said, smirking. "How rich. You make me promise to be on my best behavior around your girlfriend, yet, you have been lying to her since day one. Excuse me." He held up finger and pulled his phone from his pocket. "Hi. Leg Warehouse? Yeah, my friend Ted needs something to stand on. So, nothing for him to stand on? Okay, and thanks so much." They all laughed, but Ted shook his head. "Ted, doesn't Victoria deserve to know that you once had the hots for Robin? I have half a mind to tell the story of the re-return."

"No. I-I swore you to secrecy on that," Ted said harshly.

"Ooh, I am smelling dirt," Lily asked, leaning forward in her seat. "What is the story of the re-return?"

"Nothing. It's nothing," Ted said. "And speaking of digging up dirt, can I count on you two to behave around Victoria?"

"Us?" Lily asked, glancing up at Marshall. "What would we do?" She snorted, trying to act innocent.

"Look, um, you guys have always been like the parents that I still have and, in fact, moved here to get away from," Ted began. Cas looked down. "However, could we skip the traditional interrogation of the new girlfriend tonight?"

"Fine," Marshall said, sighing.

"Fine," Lily agreed.

"Thank you," Ted said, smiling a little.

"I should go help Robin," Lily said, sliding out of the booth. Cas watched her go, ignoring Marshall's explanation of the rules of his made up game.

"Okay, lets go play," Marshall said excitedly, standing. Cas turned away from watching Lily and Robin talk.

"Wait, now?" Cas asked, standing as well.

"Yeah now, duh," Marshall said, leading the others out of the bar. Cas walked over to Lily and Robin as they turned to follow the guys. She rested a hand on Robin's shoulder for a second, and Robin turned to give her a little smile of thanks.

When they got up to the apartment, Marshall was pouring vodka into shot glasses around the table, and Ted was on the phone, with, from the sound of it, Victoria. A few minutes later they were all gathered around the table, Victoria had arrived, and Cas was already feeling tired as Marshall explained more of the rules to the game.

"But if you roll an even number while adjacent to the Peppermint Forest, then you "Marshall out," and all your chips go into the pot, and remember, if you ever ask the question "What?", then... you got to drink. Got it?" Marshall asked at last. Cas glanced around the room, not having understood the few rules she had even payed attention to.

"No," she coursed with the rest of them, shaking her head.

"Okay, okay, no, no, we'll just start, you guys'll pick it up," he said, picking up a pair of dice. "Newbie goes first. Roll," he said, handing the dice to Victoria.

"Okay," she said, then threw them on the table gently, and looked up at him to explain.

"Three! You got Autobiography," he said, moving her marker along the board and picking up a yellow index card. "Now, that's where you have to answer a personal question about your dating life truthfully in order to move on."

"Marshall, come on," Ted said, frowning at Marshall.

"Hey, she's the one who rolled a three," Marshall said. Cas rolled her eyes.

"Have you ever cheated while in a relationship?" Marshall asked, pretending to read off the card. "Wow, good question," he added, pretending to look surprised. Cas covered her mouth with her had so she would burst out laughing.

"You don't have to answer that," Ted said softly, turning to Victoria.

"It's okay," she said, then turned to the group. "Um, well, I was in a really crappy relationship in college, and I wound up kissing this guy at a party one night, and I felt terrible about it, so, I came clean, and we broke up."

"Victoria, that was an honest and mature answer," Marshall said solemnly. "You may advance to The Gumdrop Mountains." He moved her piece again as she cheered a little.

"So Victoria, did you ever re-return to this guy?" Barney said, wriggling his eyebrows at Ted. Ted glared at him and shook his head.

"What?" Victoria asked, confused.

"You said what, you got to drink!" Marshall said, then watched as Victoria shrugged, then took the shot. He refilled her glass.

"Oh, Barney, by the way, I went to a party in that new building on 82nd," Lily began. "And the host said she knew you. What is her name? Sharon? Shannon?"

"Shannon?!" Barney asked, his voice cracking a little in panic. He settled back into his seat. "Shannon, Shannon... No, don't remember any Shannon."

"Really?" Lily asked, her eyebrows raised in disbelief. "Well, 'cause she gave me a videotape to give…"

"Where's the tape?" He asked quickly, then tried to act normal again.

"Fine," Lily said, holding her hands out in a 'calm down' gesture. "I'll go get it."

"Cool, okay. You know, whenever," Barney said, though he watched her closely all the way to her room.

"Okay, Robin, your roll," Marshall said, continuing the game. She rolled. "Five! Another Autobiography... for the player to your left, which... Victoria!"

"Of course," Ted said, sighing. Robin looked at the floor, and Cas patted her shoulder again.

"Victoria, "How many boyfriends did you have before you started dating Ted?"" Marshall asked, looking over at them with an eager expression on his face.

"Wait, the card actually says "Ted?"" Ted said, glaring at Marshall who hid the card on the couch.

"Okay, uh, well, boyfriends-I guess I've only had… two," Victoria said, smiling.

"Prude alert," Robin snorted.

"Well... that's serious boyfriends. I've dated other guys in between," Victoria added, looking unsure.

"Oh, slut alert!" Robin said, and Cas nudged her as Lily came out of her room. Barney stood and walked toward her.

"Oh, great, there it is. Thanks, Lily. You're a peach," he said, grabbing the tape from her. He promptly went into the kitchen and fully destroyed it, breaking the plastic and ripping the black tape from it. He came back out, dusting his jacket off nonchalantly. "Oh, wow, look at that," he said, glancing down at the board as he returned to his seat. "Robin landed on the Chocolate Swamp. That's five chips for me."

"Thank you!" Marshall said excitedly. "Finally somebody understands Marsh-gammon."

"Barney, what was on that tape?" Lily asked, her mouth still open in surprise. Cas, sitting on the floor beside Barney, could see his foot tapping nervously.

"Too bad you'll never find out," he said, shrugging.

"Oh, damn it," Lily said, purposefully acting fake upset. "If only I'd given you a fake tape and hidden the real tape in my purse. Oh, wait. That's exactly what I did," she said, grabbing another tape from her purse and waving it in the air.

"What?!" Barney yelled, jumping to his feet and trying to grab the table.

"Drink!" Marshall said, and Barney stormed over to the table to drink his shot.

"Yeah, you were acting so weird about it, I gave you Ted's graduation tape instead," she said, and Ted looked at her, frowning again. "So, should we pop it in?" She asked, looking at the others as she dodged Barney again. Ted stood and helped push Barney back, which forced Cas and Robin to stand so they wouldn't get stepped on.

"Give it to me, give it, give me…" Barney pleaded, still reaching for the tape.

"Play the tape, play it, play it!" Ted chanted at her, holding Barney off so Lily could put the tape in.

"Ted!" Barney said, frowning. "Fine, fine. You can play it." He said, moving back to his chair in defeat. The tape began with Barney, but with really long hair and crying. Cas's mouth fell open.

"Shannon! I love you! I love you so much. What about us changing the world together? Don't tell me you've forgotten. I know I haven't," the tape Barney said. Then he began to play the piano, still crying. "Will I ever see another rainbow? Will an eagle ever soar through this tempest of woe? Baby, please Don't go There's a thief in the palace, she's stolen all my love There's a thief in the palace and she's…"

Barney got up, ejected the tape, and stormed out of the apartment, slamming the door behind him. They all sat in stunned silence for a moment, then Marshall and Lily called an end to game night for the moment. Cas was the first one out the door, already on her phone to call Barney as she walked back to her apartment. He didn't answer, so she hit redial and let it ring out again as she unlocked her door, then hit redial a second time when he still didn't answer. She hung the phone up when she heard his ringtone coming from behind her door, and smiled a little to herself. She was oddly touched that he would come to her when he was upset about something.

"Barney?" She asked as she closed her apartment door and flipped on the light. He was sitting on the couch, playing with the tape in his hands and frowning. She kicked off her shoes and shrugged out of her jacket, dropping it and her purse on the floor by the door, then she went over to the couch and sat beside him, hugging him around the shoulders. He leaned into her a little, even though she was a lot shorter than him, even sitting, and she smiled softly. "Do you want to talk about it?" She asked gently.

"No," he said, his voice a little scratchy.

"Okay," she said, smiling. "Are you hungry? I can make dinner," she suggested, changing the subject.

"No thanks," he said, sighing.

"Okay, then let's go to bed," she said, tugging the tape out of his hands and setting it on the coffee table. Then she stood and grabbed his hands to pull him to his feet. It didn't work too well since he was bigger than her, and she had no traction on the floor. He eventually stood anyway and sighed again.

"Are you using sex to try to make me feel better?" He asked, the corner of his mouth twitching.

"Only if it's working," she said, smirking. He smirked back.

"It's working," he said, following her to her bed.

* * *

Barney stayed at her apartment for the entire next day, not leaving until around seven. He was in a much better mood, which Cas was glad about, but she didn't notice until about twenty minutes later that he had left the tape on her coffee table. She held it for a moment, wondering if she should play it, but then decided against it. She didn't really want to see Barney crying and singing his heart out to some chick. She put it in the back of her video cupboard, then went to figure out what she could wear to the bar that night.

"Did you try his cell phone?" Marshall was asking as Cas slid into the booth beside Marshall and Lily. Robin, Ted, and Victoria were across from them.

"Yeah, I left two messages," Ted said, and Cas realized they were probably talking about Barney. He had been ignoring calls the entire time he was at her apartment. "I checked the cigar club, the Lusty Leopard. He's off the grid." Cas opened her mouth to tell them he was fine when Barney himself walked in and sat down on the chair at the end of the table, looking more normal than ever.

"Hey, guys, what up?" He said, smirking at them.

"Barney, where have you been?" Robin asked, concerned.

"Yeah, we're-we're really sorry about that," Ted added.

"Yeah, so sorry," Lily began, then her face grew into a grin. "But seriously, what was up with the tape?" Barney frowned and turned to leave, but Cas caught his arm and pulled him back. "No, no, stay."

"Come on. Stay!" Marshall and Robin added.

"I'm sorry. I don't want to talk about it," Barney said, frowning. "It was the most embarrassing, and humiliating thing that ever happened to me"

"Well, we all have embarrassing stories," Marshall said, trying to comfort Barney. "Sometimes it's good to-to talk about it."

"Oh, really?" Banrey asked, raising an eyebrow at him. "Then why don't you tell us your most humiliating moment, Marshall? Show me how good it is." Marshall glanced at him, then around the table, then swallowed.

"All right," he said, putting his hands up in defeat. "I was stopping by Lily's kindergarten class to say hi, but they were all at recess. I really had to pee, so I went into the class's restroom. It was a-a smaller target than I'm used to, so I figured I should sit down. What I didn't realize was, it was a shared bathroom. I wish I'd pulled up my pants."

"The kids still call him Funny Butt," Lily said as the table laughed.

"Okay. I'll tell you my story," Barney said. "Believe it or not, I was not always as awesome as I am today." He straightened his tie, smirking. "It was 1998. I was just out of college, and I was working at a coffeehouse with my girlfriend. My girlfriend... Shannon. I used to sing at the coffeehouse.

* * *

_"I love your singing, Barney." Shannon said._

_"And I love you, Shannon," Barney replied, hugging her around the waste and giving her a little kiss._

_"Joining the Peace Corps with you is gonna be legendary," Shannon said, smiling._

_"I know. Only five short weeks till we're down in Nicaragua," Barney said, smiling too._

_"Hey, nonfat latte to go," a business man snapped from the counter._

_"Mellow order, bro, mellow order," Barney said, nodding as Shannon went to help another customer._

_"Dude, that your g-friend?" The business max asked, leaning over the counter to talk quieter. "All right, high five!" Barney gave him a pitying look as he fixed the mans coffee._

_"Sorry, I only give high twos," he said holding his fingers up in a piece sign._

_"Whatevs. As long as you're nailing that," the man said._

_"Listen to you," Barney said, shaking his head. "That? You know, women aren't objects. They're human beings. And FYI, Shannon and I have decided to wait till we're married. You can read about it in my Zine." He held up a little booklet with hand drawn things on the front._

_"Hey, haircut, right here," the man said, leaning in to talk to Barney again. "Open up your knowledge basket, 'cause here it comes. Forget that touchy-feely crap. You get money, you get laid. End of discussion."_

_"I feel sorry for you, man," Barney said, handing the man his coffee._

_"Peace out, hombre," the man said as Shannon returned to the counter._

_"Suits," he said, shaking his head disapprovingly as he hugged Shannon._

* * *

"So, five weeks later, we were all set to leave for the Peace Corps. Only problem was... she never showed up," Barney said, looking down sadly.

"She never showed?" Robin asked.

"So, what happened next?" Ted asked, leaning forward in interest. Barney sighed and looked at them, then frowned and shook his head.

"You know what?" He asked, "This was a mistake." He made to stand up and Cas raised an eyebrow at him. He was being way too dramatic for normal. He must have had a really weird ending to the story.

"Wait... What if somebody else told their most humiliating story?" Lily asked, nodding to the others.

"Oh, I know just how to decide who," Marshall said, then fished in a bag at his feet and pulled out a twister spinner and set it flat in the middle of the table.

"You brought the game to the bar?" Lily asked.

"Well, we're not quitting just 'cause Ted's so far ahead," Marshall said, rolling his eyes then lightly flicking the spinner.

"I was winning?" Ted asked in surprise.

"Fine. I'll go next," Robin said as the needle stopped on her. "I was doing a report on live TV about a Hansom cab driver-"

"Not the slipping-in-horse-poop story!" Barney interrupted.

"Yeah, we all know that one," Ted said, shaking his head.

"Okay, how about this?" Victoria said, leaning forward. "I will tell you my most humiliating story."

"Yeah, Victoria, way to step up!" Marshall said.

"Okay, it involves a game of truth or dare, a squeeze-bottle of marshmallow ice cream topping, and the hot tub at my grandparents' retirement community," she said, then launched into one of the weirdest and most disturbing stories Cas had ever heard. By the end of it the entire table was open mouthed.

"That is the greatest story ever!" Marshall said, eyes wide.

"Oh my God!" Lily said, shaking her head.

"Wow, wow!" Ted said, speechless. Cas was just shaking her head in wonder.

"Victoria," Barney began, staring at her. "I deem your offering... worthy. My saga... continues. So I went back to the coffeehouse to find Shannon.

* * *

_"Barney?" Shannon asked, walking up to Barney._

_"Sugar Bear, where were you?" He asked._

_"Oh, I'm sorry. My dad won't let me go," Shannon said, sounding regretful._

_"But the Nicaraguans need us!" Barney said dramatically._

_"It's just, he's still supporting me, and... Look, he's coming by soon to talk about it, but I think you should go on without me," Shannon said, giving him a little push towards the door._

_"Shannon, there is no-" he began, but she cut him off, shaking her head._

_"Barney, it's your dream. It's only two years. I know we can make it," she said, pushing him a little closer to the door._

* * *

"As I walked away, I realized Shannon was an adult. Her father couldn't control her life. I had to go back and confront him. She was in the middle of a heated argument with her dad… when she jumped up and started kissing him."

"What?!" They all called out in unison.

"Now we all got to drink," Marshall said and everyone besides Barney lived their glasses to their lips.

"Oh, my God. What happened next?" Ted asked, and they all settled in to listen again.

"I don't know, guys, " Barney said, frowning.

"Okay, okay. Marshall's mom sent us cookies…"

"Lily, no!" Marshall said, giving her a look.

"For the team, Marshall, for the team," she said gravely.

* * *

_"Hey, Mrs. Eriksen, it's Lily," Lily said into the phone, holding up a cookie as she spoke. "Thank you so much for the delicious cookies. Mayonnaise. Really? Never would have guessed. Well, I will definitely give Marshall a kiss for you. Okay. Take care." She hung up and set the phone on the desk._

_"Oh, crap," Marshall said, coming in to the apartment and spotting the box on the desk. "My mom sent cookies?"_

_"Yeah. I wish we had a dog, so they wouldn't go to waste," she said, laughing._

_"So we've got the whole place to ourselves," he said suggestively._

_"I'm thinking floor sex," Lily said, pulling him down._

_"Sounds reasonable," Marshall said._

_"Ooh, floor's cold. Grab that afghan your mom made," Lily said, and Marshall reached up to grab it from the couch._

* * *

"And it turns out she was still on the phone, listening." Lily said, shaking her head in embarrassment.

"The whole time?" Robin asked sympathetically.

"The... whole… time," Lily said.

"Barney, that was really embarrassing for both of us. We just earned a huge chunk of story," Marshall said, turning back to Barney.

"Right. So where was I?" He began. "Oh, yeah. Shannon was sucking face with her dad.

* * *

_Shannon spotted Barney over the mans shoulder and got up to speak to him._

_"How can... With your dad? I mean, I know judge not lest ye be judged, but gross!," Barney said, his face sad._

_"Barney, that's not my dad. His name's Greg. I've been seeing him for a few weeks," Shannon said, her face not apologetic at all. "I was hoping you'd just leave, and we could avoid all this."_

_"We're breaking up?" Barney asked. "But what about the Peace Corps?"_

_"Yeah, all this granola business, it was just a phase," Shannon said, shrugging. "Greg's older. He's successful. He buys me all this cool stuff."_

_"But I love you," Barney said, beginning to tear up._

_"But he has a boat," Shannon said, grinning. "You should go to the Peace Corps and forget about me."_

* * *

"I didn't go. That night, I recorded my video and mailed it to Shannon. I didn't see her until a week later." Barney said, then leaned back in his chair, looking at Cas. She looked back for a moment, confused.

"Well?" Marshall asked, nudging her. She sighed, realizing they wanted her to share a story now too. She frowned, trying to think of an embarrassing story to tell. She didn't have a lot of them, since she didn't have family, or until recently, friends, to embarrass herself in front of.

"Oh, Okay, I have one," she said, remembering a story form high school that she was pretty sure she hadn't told them yet. "At my Junior Prom, back in high school, one of my friends had this boyfriend from a different school, and at the time the rest of us didn't have dates, so she set us up with some of this guys friends. So we all get to the dance as a group and she introduces us to his friends, and since she said I was the shortest girl there, they paired me up with one of the guys friends who was also… really short."

"Like how short?" Robin asked, interrupting.

"Like a foot shorter than me," Cas said, grinning as the laughed. "So anyway, we went to the dance together, and of course the pictures were horrible, and people were laughing at us, which I assumed was because he was so much shorter than I am. So halfway through the dance, one of my friends comes up to me and tells me that the bottom of my dress was stuck in my underwear." She said, pausing as the table laughed again. "And, even better, you could totally tell in the pictures." They laughed again and she sighed. "At least my underwear was cute." Which set them off giggling again.

"Okay, acceptable," Barney said, smiling. "So I went back to work at the coffeehouse, and Shannon had quit."

* * *

_"There's sugar in the basket," Barney told a customer, his voice sad. He looked up and almost smiled as he saw Shannon coming in the doors. "Shannon! Shannon, you came back!"_

_"I'm just picking up my last paycheck," she said, frowning._

_"Oh," he said, then looked down and played with his hair. "Did you... did you get my tape?"_

_"Oh, she got the tape," the business man from before said, coming in the door and wrapping an arm around Shannon's shoulders._

_"You? It was you?" Barney asked, his face heartbroken._

_"Will I ever see another rainbow," he sang badly, mocking the table Barney had sent. "Oh, man." He snorted in laughter as Shannon began to giggle. Barney began to cry and ran out of the coffeehouse._

* * *

"And as I was walking down the street, someone gave me a flier for a sale on suits that read "Suit up" so I cut my hair, got rid of my goatee, got a suit, and became who I am today," Barney said, finishing the story.

"Oh, you poor thing," Lily said, frowning.

"The story's not over," Barney said. "I did see Shannon one more time."

"When?" Marshall pushed the button that told them all to drink, thinking Robin had said 'what' instead, then he lifted his hand in apology.

"Sorry," he said.

"You've got to tell us," Lily begged.

"I don't know, I think I might need one last story to get me through it," barney said smugly, looking at Ted,

"Fine. Um... oh! The green testicle story. So I was playing ultimate Frisbee in college and there was this barefoot dude with weirdly sharp toenails-" he began, and Cas was almost glad when Barney cut him off. That sounded like a disgusting story.

"Oh, come on, Ted!" Barney said. "You know what story I want to hear. Everyone else here has manned up tonight and told the truth. Why can't you?" Ted sighed.

"You're right," he said, then turned to Victoria. "Victoria, I'm sorry I haven't told you this yet, but a while back, I was kind of into Robin," he waved a hand toward Robin. "In fact, on our first date, I might have said, "I love you." Understandably, she freaked out and I left. But unfortunately, the night did not end there." He turned back to the table.

"We all ended up at the bar with our cab driver Ranjit. And I drank... a lot.

* * *

_"So you guys think I should have kissed her?" Ted said drunkenly. "Well, I'll tell you what, I'm gonna go kiss her right... now."_

_"Yes! Do it!" Barney said, standing to follow a stumbling Ted from the bar._

_"To the cab," Ranjit said, then followed them._

* * *

"And when we got to Robin's, I went upstairs, and was about to knock on the door, when I suddenly threw up on her welcome mat. She heard us, so we ran," Ted said, shaking his head.

"You ralphed and ran?" Lily asked, shaking her head in shame.

"I thought you were vomit-free since '93. So that was a lie?" Marshall asked, crossing her arms.

"You re-returned for me?" Robin asked, half smiling. "That's really sweet. Though you kind of ruined my customized Scherbatsky doormat."

"Sorry," Ted said.

"It's okay," Robin said, still looking like she was touched that Ted had re-returned.

"Victoria, I know this must be-" he started, turning towards her.

"Yeah. It kind of is," she interrupted, swirling her drink and not looking at him.

"Wow, Ted, you were right," Barney said, grinning. "You shouldn't have told that story. But you did earn yourself the right to the end of mine." Everyone leaned forward. "We fast-forward eight years into the future."

"Wait, eight years, that's, that's this year," Marshall said, frowning.

"Marshall, not only is it this year, it's tonight," Barney said, grinning again. "So I went to Shannon's tonight.

* * *

_"Hi." Barney said as the apartment door opened._

_"Barney?" Shannon asked, confused._

_"Hi, Shannon," he replied._

_"What are you doing here?" Shannon asked._

_"Just listen. When you left me for that guy Greg, it changed me," he said, then raised his arms to gesture to his suit. "Now I'm this. I-I know this is crazy. It's just, you were once such a big part of my life. And it just seemed insane that you didn't know who I am now. So here I am._

* * *

And then she told me about her life," Barney said. "She and Greg dated for a while and then split up. But here's the real kicker: Shannon's a mom. She has a little kid named Max. That's crazy. That could have been my kid. But instead, what do I have? My whole life's some money in the bank, some suits in my closet and a string of one-night stands." He trailed off, looking down.

"Hey. Come on," Lily said, trying to comfort him. Cas sunk a little farther into her seat. "I mean, just because her life went one way and yours went another, it doesn't make your life any worse."

"My life rocks!" Barney said, looking up and grinning. "Money, suits and sex. These are tears of joy!" He wiped a little moisture away from his eyes. "I could be cooped up in some tiny apartment changing some brat's poopy diapers. But instead, I'm out in the world being awesome 24/7, 365! You let me dodge a bullet, Big Guy," he said, looking up to the ceiling. "Plus, here's the mini-cherry on top of the regular cherry on top of the sundae of awesomeness that is my life. After Shannon and I talked, I nailed her."

"Nope," Lily said, shaking her head. Cas looked down at her hands as Barney began to fish his phone out of his pocket.

"Yeah," he said, grinning.

"Nope," Lily repeated, shaking her head.

"Yeah," Barney said, scrolling through something on his phone.

"Sorry. Don't buy it. You're making it up," Lily said, leaning forward. "You're just trying to cover the fact that you actually had a profound moment of doubt about yourself and…" Barney held up his phone in front of her, the sound of a moaning woman coming from it. "Oh, my God."

"Oh, Barney!" Shannon's voice came from the phone.

"Video's pretty good on this phone, huh?" Barney said, smirking as he moved the screen in front of Marshall.

"Is your phone on?" Shannon's voice continued on the video.

"Oh, no. It just takes a while to power down," video Barney said.

"Ew, gross. Just stop it," Lily said, shutting the phone and cutting off the video.

"Ladies, gentlemen… Ted," Barney said, pushing his chair back and standing. "This has been a wonderful evening. I got great dirt on all you guys. I got Ted to tell the re-return. I finally nailed Shannon! Told her I'd call her tomorrow. Yeah, right. And I rediscovered just how awesomely awesome my life is. Peace out, hombres!" He said, then turned around and left the bar.

"I think Barney just won game night," Marshall said, still in shock. Cas left after that, not even making up an excuse to go. She felt sick to her stomach as she went home and fell asleep.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

"Hey, girls," Victoria said, sliding into the booth beside Robin, across from Cas and Lily. The three of them had been sitting there for over an hour looking through bridal magazines, looking for dress styles that Lily might like.

"Hey," All three of them responded at the same time.

"Hey. I'm on my way to meet Ted," Victoria said, smiling. "It's our two monthiversary, so we're going out to dinner."

"Great!" Robin said sarcastically. "Well, that answers all the questions I didn't ask."

"Robin!" Lily said harshly, at the same time as Cas kicked her under the table.

"Oh, come on," Robin said, looking put out. "We bust on each other. We're just at that place in our strong friendship."

"Really?" Victoria asked, smiling widely. "Oh." She said, then reached out to hug Robin.

"Get off me," Robin said immediately. "Oh, see? I did it again."

"What are you guys up to?" Victoria asked, scooting a little bit away from Robin then spotting the magazines. "Oh, dress shopping. You know, I make wedding cakes for a lot of fancy bridal shops. If you want, I could take you shopping, maybe get you a discount."

"Really?" Lily asked, looking up from the pages of her magazine. "That'd be great."

"Yeah," Victoria said, smiling. Her phone rang and she pulled it from her pocket, then looked at it with a frown. "Huh. I should take this. Hello?" She said, sliding out of the booth and walking out of the bar to talk.

"Hey, I thought it was going to be just us tomorrow," Robin said, leaning over the table to talk quietly. "What's with inviting Punky Brewster?"

"Robin, you've got to get over this Ted and Victoria thing," Lily said, shaking her head. "You had your chance, and now he's moved on. Can't you just be happy for them?"

"The best I can give you is a fake smile and dead eyes," Robin said seriously. Cas laughed.

"Sold," Lily said, smiling as Victoria came back in and stood at the end of the table, her face worried.

"Victoria, what's wrong?" Cas asked, looking up at her.

"I've just been offered a fellowship at a culinary institute," she said, though she didn't look excited. "In Germany." She said, sliding back into her seat, staring at the table in shock.

"Wow, that's huge!" Lily said, flipping her magazines closed and stacking them.

"I know," she said, still in shock. "I think I need to go," she said, then stood. "Want to go shopping tomorrow? Maybe around Eleven?" She asked, looking at them in question.

"Sure," Lily said, while Cas nodded and Robin just shrugged. Victoria smiled, then left.

"I've got to go too," Cas said, finishing her drink off. "I have some more notes to go over if I'm going to be spending all day shopping with you guys," she said, then walked back to her apartment to work.

* * *

The next morning Cas took a taxi to the address Victoria had texted her, and smiled, spotting the beautiful dresses in the window. She wasn't really big on weddings, or dresses, but these were just beautiful. She walked inside and was led to a private dressing room where Lily, Robin, and Victoria were talking and drinking some wine.

"Hey!" Cas said, sitting down on the floor by the table.

"Oh good, you're here," Lily said as one of the women who worked there began measuring her. Her phone rang while the woman measured the length of one arm and Lily pulled it out. "Hey baby," she said, grinning into the phone. "Everything's so fluffy and white. It's like shopping in a marshmallow. How's Barney's tailor?" She asked, frowning as the woman measured down her front. "Oh, good luck, baby." She said, then hung up.

"Now, what sort of dress did you have in mind, dear?" She asked, looking Lily over.

"Nothing too huge or-or poofy," Lily said, using her hands to sort of demonstrate what she meant. "I'm not really a girlie girl. But I would like to look like a beautiful princess." Cas laughed as she poured herself a glass of wine.

"I saw a couple up front that were nice," Robin said, smiling.

"By the window?" The woman asked, and Robin nodded. She turned to Lily and rested a hand on her shoulder. "No offense, dear, but those are a little out of your price range." She said, then walked away.

"Where does she get off?" Lily said, staring after her as the others waited. "She doesn't know how much money I make."

"Oh, these women are experts," Victoria said, sipping her wine. "They can guess your net annual income just by looking at your underwear."

"Damn you Old Navy and your reasonably-priced three-packs!" Lily said, huffing.

"At least we get free champagne!" Victoria said, holding up her glass.

"And cake," Robin added.

"Mm-hmm," Victoria said, taking a bite of hers.

"Speaking of which, Victoria, have you decided what to do about your doughnut fellowship?" Robin asked, and Lily nudged her, while Cas hit her foot. Robin rolled her eyes.

"You know, I don't know. I mean, I want to go, but I don't want to lose Ted," Victoria said, not noticing the silent battle between Cas and Lily and Robin to try to make Robin behave. "I even thought about long distance, as if that ever works."

"Ugh. All talking and no sex?" Lily said, rolling her eyes. "Kill me now." She said as the woman walked back in, a dress draped over her arm. Lily went to try it on.

"I know it sounds lame, but I actually think that Ted might be The One," Victoria continued, knowing Lily could probably hear them. "That's pretty hard to walk away from."

"Well, I don't know. I'd feel a little stupid turning down a huge opportunity to chase some guy I'd only known two months," Robin said, and Cas nudged her again.

"But this isn't just some guy. This is Ted," Victoria said, still not noticing the silent fight. "He's amazing. He's the best guy I know."

"Yeah, in America, but German guys?" Robin said smirking. "Whew! I would let them bread my schnitzel any day, if you know what I mean."

"I really don't…" Victoria began softly, looking between Robin and Cas.

"Sex," Robin said, then lifted the empty champagne bottle as the worker came back in. "Oh, excuse me, ma'am. This bastard's kicked. Thanks." The woman took it with a frown on her face and left the room as Lily came out of the dressing room in probably one of the ugliest dresses Cas had ever seen.

"Oh!" The three of them said at the same time, trying to look like they liked the dress.

"It's okay, guys, I hate it," Lily said, huffing.

"Just horrible," Victoria said.

"It's bad, it's really bad," Robin said, shaking her head.

"Short in front, long in the back? That is the mullet of wedding dresses," Cas added, grimacing at the dress.

"You know, Victoria, Marshall and I did long distance once," Lily said, sitting on the chair Robin had vacated. "In college, I did an art course in Paris. I was the only American there. It was really lonely. I only had one friend, Gabrielle. She was kind of homely and strange-looking, and she was really self-conscious about this little mustache she had. Anyway, halfway through the semester, she just stopped talking to me, and I never figured out why. And then I had nobody. The only thing that got me through was knowing that my soul mate was back at home waiting for me. If Ted's your soul mate, then it may be worth it to hang onto him."

"But how am I supposed to know if we're soul mates?" Victoria asked, her face anxious. "It's too soon." Her phone rang and she stood to pull it from her pocket. "Ooh. Speak of the devil. Hello." She said into the phone, smiling. "Cats." She said, raising an eyebrow. "Hated the musical, love the animal."

"A cat person. Why am I not surprised?" Robin whispered to them, rolling her eyes. Lily shook her head.

"Bye," Victoria said, then hung up the phone and looked at them. "Why does Ted want to know if I like cats?"

"Maybe he's going to buy you one," Lily said, standing to look into the mirror again, a look of disgust on her face, then went back in to try on a different dress.

"I did hear barking in the background," Victoria said, frowning. "Maybe he was in a pet store. Does he want us to get a cat together?"

"Maybe he's using an adorable kitty to guilt you into staying," Robin suggested, sipping her wine.

"That is low," Victoria said, shaking her head. "Do you really think that's what he's doing?"

"Oh, I wouldn't even wait to find out. I would be on the next plane to Germany," Robin said and Cas sighed.

"Awwww," all three of them said again as Lily left the room in another very ugly dress.

"Oh, God, you guys are sucky liars," Lily said frowning at them.

"Ugly, ugly, ugly," Robin said, shaking her head.

"I don't know what to say," Cas said, frowning at the dress.

"You know what? We're doing this all wrong," Victoria said, standing. "I am going to get you one of those front window dresses, just for fun." She said, then left the room.

"Are you okay?" Lily asked, turning to face Robin.

"I'm fine," Robin said, shrugging.

"Okay," Lily said, obviously not believing her. "Just kind of seemed like you're trying to hustle Victoria out of the country."

"I'm not, I'm just trying to support her," Robin said. "She got a super-important dessert scholarship."

"Stop being sarcastic," Lily said, frowning at her. "It is a super-important dessert scholarship. Wow, that's hard to say without sounding sarcastic. Look... I know you're not Victoria's biggest fan, but she seems to make Ted happy. So think about that before you use your miles to buy her a plane ticket."

"Somebody say "beautiful princess,"" Victoria said coming back into the room with a very beautiful gown over her arm.

"Oh, my gosh, it's perfect! Oh! This dress is totally going to get me laid on my wedding night," Lily said, taking it from her and running into the changing room.

"Oh, look how happy she is," Victoria said, smiling after her. "You know, I've always thought of myself as one of those independent women who would never let any guy mess with my career. And now I'm actually thinking about it. I feel guilty, like it's un-feminist or something."

"I know what you mean," Robin said, sighing. Cas looked over at her in surprise. Was Robin finally going to try to get along with Victoria?

"You do?" Victoria asked, obviously also surprised.

"Well, I'm always putting my career ahead of my relationships, and... to be honest, there's a lot of lonely nights in that job description," Robin said, sighing as she slid to sit on the floor with Victoria and Cas.

"See, that's what I'm afraid of," Victoria said, nodding.

"Choosing Ted over your career doesn't make you un-feminist," Robin said, and Cas smiled at her. "Maybe it just means that you guys would be happy together."

"Robin... I think that you are the coolest," Victoria said, grinning over at her. "I'm so glad that we're friends."

"Oh, no way... you're the coolest," Robin said, and Cas nearly laughed. Talk about a 180.

"No, you are," Victoria said, grinning now.

"Okay, I am," Robin said, laughing.

"I'm going to stay," Victoria said softly when they had calmed down. Robin gave her a sad smile and Cas patted her foot.

"Awwww," the there of them said again, this time meaning it.

"Oh, I am so beautiful!" Lily said, turning to look into a mirror. "Oh, don't tell me how much it costs. Just snap my neck now, so I can die this pretty."

"Wow, you look incredible," Robin said, standing with the others to come around and look at the front of the dress.

"Oh. Okay, okay, how much is it, on a scale of never to never ever?" Lily asked, closing her eyes as Robin checked the label.

"Never ever, ever, ever, ever... times infinity," Robin said, and Lily sighed sadly, taking a step back.

"Well, it's okay. You know, what makes a bride beautiful is that she's just happy to be getting married," Lily said, backing up to sit on the table… which still had the cake on it. The three of them gasped, covering their mouths. "Oh, guys, I know I look amazing, but the important thing is that Marshall and I love each other, right?"

"Yes, you're right," Cas said, lowering her hands. "But also... you just sat down in the cake." Lily gasped and stood partway. The entire back of the dress was smeared with cake.

"But, you know what?" Victoria asked, trying to sound hopeful. "It's going to come out because it's only... chocolate and raspberry." They all groaned.

"Okay. Come on, get up, let us see how bad it is," Robin said, coming forward to help Lily stand. As she got to her feet, Lily stumbled forward and there was a loud ripping noise. They all froze in horror for a second as the woman came through the door and stopped short, staring at the dress.

"It was like this when I found it?" Lily said, phrasing the words into a question.

"And how will you be paying for this?" She asked calmly and Lily sighed in defeat.

"Credit card… s," Lily said, then went to change out of the dress. Cas waited by the changing room door and took the dress as soon as Lily had it off, carrying it back to the dressing room, ruined side up.

"Help me get some of this off," she said, laying the dress across two chairs. "Maybe we can fix it…"

The other two came over to help, though all three of them figured it was a lost cause. They got the biggest chunks of cake off, and Cas noticed that there wasn't much of the raspberry filling that had actually hit the dress, but chocolate was still hard to get out. The woman came back with a plastic dress bag and they helped her get it around the dress, then Cas held it as Lily left the room in her normal clothes, looking devastated.

They took a cab back to MacLaren's, and the others went down to get a drink while Cas dropped off her purse and things at home, which included Lily's dress since the other girl didn't want to have it in the house in case Marshall saw it. She hesitated, wondering if it was worth it to try to fix the dress, but what else was Lily going to do with it? Cas put the stopper in her sink and began running cold water to fill it up as she stripped the bag away from the dress. She knew that you weren't supposed to get this kind of material wet, but that was the only way she knew to get chocolate stains out of things. She pulled open her freezer and pulled out all the trays of ice she could find, dumping the cubes into the half full sink, then refilling the trays to put back in the freezer. She lifted away the layers of dress until she had only the thinnest top layer, since the chocolate hadn't gotten through to the next layer. She folded the dress back so she could set the large stain circle into the sink of ice water, then made sure it was balanced on her sink before she turned to leave, letting the dress soak for a while.

"Lily, you have to tell him," Robin was saying as Cas slid into the seat next to Robin. Victoria had disappeared somewhere."That dress cost a fortune."

"No, I'm just gonna wait for the next time Marshall really screws up, and then, I'll just slip this in, and it won't seem so bad by comparison," Lily said, frowning in worry.

"Well, here's hoping he cheats on you," Robin said, raising her glass. Cas smiled.

"Yeah, but only, like, second base," Lily said seriously, then leaned back as Barney and Marshall approached them, both wearing suits.

"Look at us: two guys in suits," Barney said, lifting his drink. "You feel that slight tingle? That's every girl in the bar wanting you, and every guy wanting to be you. Actually, it's mostly me, but you're getting some of the splash." Marshall shook his head, then slid into the booth beside Lily as Barney pulled up a chair.

"Hey, babe. Dollar beer night, so I splurged and got us each our own," Marshall said, sliding a tankard over to Lily, who smiled.

"So, have you thought more about coming to work for Barney Corp?" Barney asked, grinning.

"Oh, please... your company is not called Barney Corp," Marshall said, shaking his head.

"Yet," he said, smirking. Then he reached inside his jacket. "Oh, I almost forgot. Sergei sent me your bill." He handed the paper over to Marshall who took it, then frowned.

"B... Barney, this says $4,000. I thought you said that it was one-third price," Marshall said, looking up.

"Yeah, must be a $12,000 suit," Barney said, shrugging. "Oh, well, guess you'll have to come work at my company."

"You set this up! You set this whole thing up!" Marshall said, his face almost angry. Barney gasped and looked offended.

"I most certainly did…" he said, then smirked.

"Well, it won't work," Marshall said. "Even if I have to get two extra night jobs, I'll pay your precious tailor. I'm not selling my soul." He looked over at Lily. "Baby, I know that this will make things harder, but I will make it work, I promise."

"I destroyed an $8,000 wedding dress," Lily said guiltily, then looked down at the table. Marshall looked at her for a moment, then looked back up at Barney, resigned.

"What time is the interview?" Marshall asked, looking sullen.

"9:00 a.m., and you'll need new shoes. Don't worry, I know a guy," Barney said, still smirking. Cas shook her head then slid out of the booth.

"I need to go," Cas said, waving farewell. When she got back to her apartment, she drained the water from the sink and lifted the fabric up to look at it better. A lot of the brown spots had come off of the white fabric, but there were still a few darker stains, and the lighter stains that looked almost yellow against the white fabric. Cas got out a bottle of stain remover and sprayed the darker areas, hoping to god it wouldn't ruin the material. She watched the stain remover sink in for a few minutes, then used her fingers to rub it in more to the areas that needed it. Afterwords she rinsed it and draped the wet material over a chair to dry, not letting it touch the rest of the dress.

* * *

The next few weeks passed by quickly. Most of the dark stains were out of Lily's dress, but there was still an obviously yellowish spot covering the entire area of the fabric that had touched the cake. Cas wasn't really sure what to do about it, and even though Marshall knew about it now, Lily hadn't asked for it back.

Victoria had left for Germany, despite telling them all that she would stay. Cas had been too busy with work to really see much of Ted, but he seemed to be doing okay with it.

"Columbia University Medical Center, this is Cassie Reynolds," Cas said, picking up the ringing phone at her desk. Usually there was a receptionist in the building to answer the calls, but the woman was on maternity leave for two months, so now all the doctors there were pitching in to answer the calls. Most of the calls were to schedule appointments, which one of the other Psychologists in the building was doing now, so Cas hardly listened to the callers before transferring them over to him. She was writing as she talked on the phone.

"Wow, that's so professional sounding Cas," the caller said, and Cas sighed, recognizing Lily's voice.

"What do you want Lil?" Cas asked, her voice no longer the polite professional one. "I'm at work."

"Wow, that's so not professional," Lily chirped, and Cas seriously considered hanging up on her.

"Sorry," Cas said, then cleared her throat. "Hi Lily, you're call is important to us, please hold," she said in an overly polite voice.

"Okay sorry!" Lily said quickly and Cas smiled. "I was calling to ask if you would come in to my kindergarten class and tell them about your job? It's career week," Lily said. Cas sighed.

"What day?" Cas asked, opening her schedule book.

"Well Marshall and Ted are coming on Wednesday, And Robin and Barney on Thursday, so either one of those works," Lily said.

"I can't do Wednesday…" Cas said, running a finger over all the time slots she had filled that week. "I might be able to do Thursday if I can come in on my lunch break, between noon and one," Cas said, tapping a finger on the empty slot on Thursday.

"That works!" Lily said, sounding excited. "See you then!"

"Bye," Cas said, hanging up the phone as she wrote over her lunch hour for Thursday.

When Thursday rolled around, Cas was very happy when her appointment for one cancelled, giving her an extra half hour at Lily's school. She took a cab, even though the subway might have been faster. When she got there, Robin and Barney weren't there yet, but Lily let her go anyway.

"Hey guys," Cas said, smiling at the class. "So Ms. Aldren told me it's career week, what do you all want to be when you grow up?" Cas asked, sitting in one of the little chairs in front of the gathered group, smiling softly. She really did like kids, at least, when they were behaving. A few raised their hands, and she pointed to the one at a time.

"I want to be a vet!"

"I want to be a dancer!"

"I want to be a dinosaur!"

Cas laughed lightly at the last one.

"Well, I don't think you can be a dinosaur," she said to the boy, and he began to pout. "Because your parent's would miss you. But you can be a scientist, they dig up dinosaur fossils and learn all about them, like how they lived and what they ate."

"They learn that from fossils?" The boy asked, his eyes wide.

"They sure do," she said, smiling. "You can learn a lot of things about an animal from how their bodies work."

"Is that what you do?" Another kid asked.

"Sort of," she said, smiling again. "I don't study animals though, I study people. I'm a psychologist."

"What's a symocigist?" A girl asked, frowning as she didn't recognize the word.

"A psychologic," Cas corrected automatically. "It's a person who studies humans, like their brains and how their bodies work. Sort of like when your mom tells you to eat your vegetables," she said. "Your mom knows that vegetables are good for you, even if they might not taste too good." Some of the kids nodded and she smiled again. "Well, I know about how vegetables are good for you, and what they do to affect your body. They give you energy so you can play, and they help your brain develop so you can learn more," she said, and a few of them were nodding. "I also study brains and thoughts, and emotions, and how they all work together," she said, trying not to use any technical terms that would confuse them. She glanced at Lily, not sure what else to say.

"Alright, are there any questions for Ms. Reynolds?" Lily said, standing up. A girl raised her hand.

"So you look at brains? Like a zombie?" She asked, looking a little afraid.

"No, not at all. We have a machine that takes a picture of your brain inside your head, and we can tell if your brain is hurt, or if something is wrong," Cas said, smiling again. Another boy raised his hand.

"Can you look at my brain?" He asked, and then all the kids were jumping up and wanting their brains looked at.

"I don't have the machine here with me, but I'm sure your brain is just fine," Cas said. "I brought some pictures though, if you would like to look at them." The boy and some others nodded eagerly so Cas pulled out a little folder of generic CT scans and different diagrams.

"That doesn't look like a brain," one of them said as she held up a CT scan and showed it around the circle.

"That's because it's the inside of a brain. See all these different sections?" Cas said, pointing to them. "This one controls your memory, this one controls your emotions, this one tells you when you are hungry," she went through them for a little while longer, knowing that most of the kids would forget this immediately.

She answered a few other questions, though they were getting more ridiculous as they went, until Robin arrived, followed by Barney.

"Okay, my time's up," Cas said, standing from the center of the group and picking up her photos. "Next you get to learn about being a News Reporter," Cas told them, ushering them back to their seats and glancing at the clock, then at Lily.

"Okay class, say goodbye to Ms. Reynolds," Lily said, smiling at Cas.

"Bye Ms. Reynolds," they all said together, and Cas waved at them, smiling again, then grabbing her bag and rushing out the door. It was 1:15 now, and she would be lucky if she made it back to her office in time for her next appointment.

* * *

"The kids loved you!" Lily said, sliding into the booth later that night. Cas usually didn't go out on week nights, but she had stopped by for an hour or so tonight. She was finally used to the amount of work she was doing, and her appointments had slowed until she could go back to her normal hours of 9-5 weekdays. Barney scoffed.

"Whatever, everyone loves me," he said, straightening his tie.

"Not you, idiot," Lily said, rolling her eyes. "Cas." Cas looked up from her drink and grinned at Lily as Barney huffed, frowning.

"I was way cooler than her," he protested.

"How would you know, you got there as I was leaving," Cas said, rolling her eyes.

"Nuh uh. I could hear from the hallway," Barney said, and Cas sighed, turning back to Lily.

"They really liked me?" She asked, smiling.

"Yeah, well, mostly because they think your job is being a zombie," Lily said, rolling her eyes. Cas laughed.

"Well as long as they like me more than Barney, that's fine," Cas said, looking sidelong at Barney as the others laughed. He huffed and stood to get another drink, making the others laugh harder. Cas smiled, very glad at that moment to have friends like these.


	10. Chapter 10

Capter Ten

Cas began to hang out with the group more often now that her work load was getting a little lighter. She had taken Lily's wedding dress out to her parents house in Staten Island to keep trying to fix it. Cas wasn't a professional by any means, but she had learned to sew from her mother when she was younger, and through an extensive amount of internet research, she had found out what kind of material the dress was made from and how to best clean stains from it. According to the internet, hydrogen peroxide mixed with a little water should do the trick, and Cas was planning on going back out there to try it that evening. She had found the ripped hem from when Lily had tripped, and, thankfully, the rip was easily fixed and not visible from the outside of the dress. If she could just get the stain out, it would be as good as new.

"Hey," Lily said, sitting across from her in the booth, Robin right behind her. "Are you excited for this dinner tonight?"

"Uh," Cas said, looking between the two of them in confusion. "What dinner?"

"My award dinner…" Robin said. "Didn't I… didn't I tell you?"

"She wasn't here when you invited the rest of us," Lily said, frowning.

"But I put you down on the invite list, I thought for sure I told you," Robin said, her face growing worried. "Oh my god, I meant to tell you, and then something came up at work and I forgot! Crap," Robin said.

"Robin has an award dinner for one of her stories, and its tonight," Lily explained, seeing that Cas was still confused.

"Well, no problem, I don't have to have a date do I?" Cas asked, looking over at Robin who shook her head. "That's fine then, I don't have any major plans for tonight, it's no big deal," she rested a hand on Robin's arm.

"Thanks, I'm just nervous I guess," Robin said.

"It'll be fine," Lily said, yawning. "Do you have a nice dress to wear?" She asked, turning to Cas.

"I think so," Cas said, trying to remember if she still owned that one dress she had bought for a work thing two years ago but had never gotten to wear. She hoped it would still fit.

"Great, we are getting together at Robin's at six to get ready," Lily said.

"Okay great, I'll see you there," Cas said as they stood to leave. Cas went bad to her apartment and searched through her closet, not finding any dresses. She sighed, wondering what she would do now, then remembered the coat closet she hardly ever used. She pulled it open and sifted through the thicker winter clothes it hadn't been cold enough to use this year, and found the garment bag in the back. She took it out and shook the dust from it before unzipping it to make sure it was the right dress.

An hour later she was shoving various make up items into her purse, then she grabbed her jacket and went to get a cab to Robin's place. She knocked on the door and Lily answered it, pulling it open for her. Both of them were already dressed, so Cas went into Robin's room to change and put on her make up.

"So should I wear my hair up or down?" Robin asked, from the living room. She heard Lily mumble something as she left Robin's room to join them again. "Lily. Lily?"

"What?" Lily asked, picking her head up from the couch.

"You okay?" Cas asked, digging through her purse for the earrings and necklace she had brought to go with her outfit.

"Oh, yeah, sorry. I'm just exhausted from work," Lily said, sitting up. "The stupid school board took away nap time in all kindergarten classes and now the kids are just going crazy by the end of the day. It's much harder to deal with because, well, I don't get my nap."

"Wait, you were taking naps when the kids were? Is that safe?" Robin asked, beginning to mess with her hair in one of the mirrors.

"Well, they're only five. What are they gonna do to me?" Lily asked, rolling her eyes. Cas finger brushed out her hair and looked into the mirror at her reflection. The light blue dress still fit, mostly. It was a little too big, but it didn't look baggy so she figured it was okay.

"Ted's still coming to this thing, right?" Robin asked, evidently deciding to leave her hair down as she turned back to them.

"Yep," Lily said, standing to look at her own reflection and mess with her hair.

"Do you think, um... hypothetically... it would be weird if I bring a date?" Robin asked nervously. Cas smiled. She had heard about the whole Ted, Victoria, Robin love triangle a few weeks ago when it became obvious that Robin and Ted were avoiding each other.

"Look at you, Scherbotsky, blatantly trying to make Ted jealous," Lily said, smiling.

"No, it's just this guy at the station. I never get involved with co-workers, but he asked me and I said yes. Is it going to be weird?" She asked again.

"No, it's not going to be weird at all," Lily said calmly, then went to the bathroom. Cas suspected she was calling Marshall to let him know, because that's what Lily did after every vaguely important conversation. Robin sighed and sat on the couch as they waited for Lily.

They left to meet up with the guys at the bar so they could go together, picking up Robin's date on the way. After spending five minutes in the cab with the guy, Cas could fully say he was obnoxious.

They got to the bar and Lily and Cas went in first, both of them trying to get away from Robin's date, Sandy. All he did was talk about himself, which was fine sometimes, but he was just awful.

"Hi, I'm Lily," Lily said, sliding into the booth next to Marshall and holding her hand out for the pretty blonde girl across form them to shake.

"I'm Cas," Cas said, offering her hand next as she slid in next to Lily.

"Hi. Mary. It's nice to meet you," the blonde said, returning their smiles.

"Mary is a friend of Barney's. Barney invited her. Just met Mary ourselves. Don't know too much about Mary. Look, a beer," Marshall said, and they all looked at him in confusion as he drank his beer.

"Hey," Ted said as he and Barney walked back over with Robin and Sandy.

"Hi," Robin said dryly.

"You look nice," Ted began, but Robin turned away awkwardly.

"Oh, um, Ted, this is Sandy," she said, gesturing to her date.

"Hi. Sandy Rivers," he said, smiling. Cas rolled her eyes as he continued. "Use my full name. People get a kick out of it."

"Hi, Sandy. Rivers. So are you two, uh…" Ted said, then trailed off.

"Starting a bunch of office rumors? Looks that way. Looks that way.," Sandy said, smiling.

"Oh, how rude of me. Uh, Robin, Sandy... Rivers... this is Mary, my date," Ted said, gesturing to Mary. Mary slid out of the booth to shake hands with them.

"Well, we should get going," Robin said after a slightly awkward silence. The group slid from the booth and walked out to the street to get cabs.

The hotel the ceremony was at was really nice, and Cas was glad she had spent so much time getting ready.

She went with Lily and Mary to the bathrooms when they stood after dinner, just to get away from the awkwardness that was the table.

"I love your lipstick," Lily said to Mary as the other woman applied it.

"Me too," Mary said, finishing with it. "You can borrow it if you want, I think it would look good on you," she said, holding the tube out. Lily put it on and looked in the mirror, smiling.

"You're right, it's great," Lily said, then looked at the bottom of the tube so she could remember the name of it. She left a second later as Cas tried to pat her hair down again.

"So what do you do?" Mary asked, messing with her hair in the mirror.

"I'm a psychologist, I work at Columbia University," Cas said, finally satisfied with her hair.

"Wow that sounds a lot more interesting than my job. I'm a paralegal at a firm downtown, it's all paperwork, very boring," Mary said, smiling into the mirror.

"Mine's mostly paperwork too," Cas said sighing. "And it seems a though I bring more home with me every night."

"Oh I know how that is," Mary said, turning to her. "We've been working on the is really huge case at my firm and its really important, so everyone's been working non-stop on it, plus we all have to keep up with our usual clients, it's like I never put down my pen anymore," Mary said, and they turned to leave the bathroom together.

"That sucks," Cas said sympathetically.

"Yeah, that's why I'm glad Barney called me for this dinner, I haven't had a date in weeks," Mary said. Cas smiled.

"Well I'm sure this will be the most boring one you have all year," she said and Mary laughed as they sat back down at the table.

"Why is Vampire Lou the host of a Saturday Afternoon Kung Fu Movie?" Lily asked, frowning at the stage. "You know, it just makes no sense. God, that pisses me off."

"Lily, you okay?" Ted asked as the table stared at her. She was usually so even tempered.

"Oh, yeah, I'm just tired. And when I get tired, I get cranky," she said, sighing.

"Really? I couldn't imagine you cranky," Sandy said, grinning as usual.

""Really? I couldn't imagine you cranky,"" Lily mocked, then sipped her drink.

"Wow. Why are you so tired?" Mary asked.

"Well, I teach kindergarten and the school board took away my nap time- the kids' nap time," Lily said, frowning.

"Lily, quit your job. Work at a private school," Barney said. "You won't have to deal with the school board, and you'll make a ton more money."

"Well, guess what, Barney?" Lily began snippily. "I don't base all my life decisions on how much money I'm going to make, unlike you and, sadly, my fiance."

"Well, it's just an internship, for the record," Marshall said, but Lily ignored him.

"Yeah, because if I did sacrifice all my values just for an easy buck, what would that make me?" Lily asked rhetorically.

"A prostitute," Mary answered anyway.

"Exactly. Thank you, Mary," Lily said, taking another large sip of her drink.

"So, Mary, what do you do for a living?" Robin asked, changing the subject.

"She's a paralegal," Barney burst in. Cas looked at him from her seat beside him and frowned. He was acting like he was about to get caught at something he shouldn't be doing.

"Yes, I'm a paralegal," Mary said, giving Barney a little confused glance.

"Oh, so, Mary the paralegal. What does a paralegal do exactly?" Robin asked, leaning forward in her seat.

"I just assist with day-to-day clerical work in a law firm downtown," Mary said, smiling.

"Oh, what firm?" Lily asked, having calmed down again.

"Douglas, O'Halloran and Stamp," Mary said, smiling. They nodded and turned back to watch another award get presented.

"So Mary, Ted is a great guy," Robin began and Cas turned back to listen to the conversation. "You hold on to him. Don't let him out of your sight for a minute."

"So, Sandy, what do you do?" Ted asked sarcastically, turning to the man across the table. "Oh, wait, I know what you do. You're the guy who reads the paper in the morning."

"You got me," Sandy said, trying to be charming. "What do you do, Ted?"

"Oh, same thing as you- I read the paper every morning," he said, then smirked. "But then after that, I finish my coffee and I go to my real job as an architect where I make an actual contribution to the world. I'm just kidding. Love your show. You're terrific." He said all of that with a flat voice.

"Thanks. I never tire of hearing that," Sandy said, not picking up on the animosity.

"Oh they're announcing my category," Robin said, turning to look at the screen. The others had wandered off through out the last category, but they returned now, excited for Robin.

"The nominees are: Scooter "Bam-Bam" Branson for A Bicycle- Joyride or Deathtrap? Mike Murphy for 13, Pregnant and Addicted. And Robin Scherbotsky for Pickles, the Singing Dog. And the winner is..." The vampire man said, unfolding an envelope dramatically. "Robin Scherbotsky." They all clapped as Robin stood and made her way to the stage, grinning.

"Thanks. Oh, wow. This is really a surprise," Robin said into the microphone. "Um, you know it's nice to be able to share this award with my friends. They're all here tonight. Marshall, Lily, Sandy Rivers… Cas, Barney... And that's it. Those are all my friends. Thank you," Cas glanced over at Ted while she clapped. The whole table glanced at him, but no one said anything.

"Congratulations," Marshall said as Robin came back to the table. The ceremony was over now, but Cas wasn't sure if they were staying for a bit longer or if they were all leaving.

"Oh, thanks," Robin said, then turned to Sandy. "Um, Sandy, do you want to get a cab?"

"Sure. Let's go," Sandy said getting to his feet.

"Yeah, this party's dead," Ted said, turning to Mary. "Mary, you want to go upstairs? We, uh, got a room." He said to the rest of the table. They all sat in silence, wondering what to say.

Should we go?" Mary said after a moment.

"Yeah. Thanks. Well... Good night," Ted said, then turned to lead Mary away.

"Good night," Robin said as well, leading Sandy away. Cas shook her head.

"Robin, where's Sandy Rivers?" Marshall asked as Robin came back to the table alone. Lily was leaning on Marshall's shoulder now, dozing off.

"I put him in a cab," Robin said, sitting down.

"So you and he aren't…?" Barney asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I don't date people I work with," Robin said, sighing. "I was just trying to make Ted jealous. Is he…?"

"He's off trying to make you jealous," Marshall said.

"Oh, well, good for them," Robin said, sipping the drink she had left there earlier. "And, you know, if Ted likes her, she's probably pretty cool." They were silent for a few moments, then Lily sat up in shock, looking at Marshall.

"Mary's a prostitute?" She said.

"What?!" Robin asked.

"No way," Cas said at the same time, shaking her head.

"Barney paid for her," Marshall said, pointing across the table.

"Is that true?" Lily asked, turning to Barney.

"We were having a conversation about prostitution, and then Barney calls her up and then she shows up at the bar and now she and Ted are upstairs," Marshall said quickly.

"Okay, seriously, what is going on with Ted lately? Is he having a nervous breakdown?" Robin asked, shaking her head.

"You know, Barney, for anyone else, this would be a new low, but sadly, for you, it's just a new middle," Lily said, then she frowned and began to panic. "Oh, my God, I used her lipstick! Ah!" She said, grabbing a napkin to wipe it from her lips.

"That's her napkin," Marshall said.

"No!" Lily said, practically crying.

"Guys, stop," Cas said, frowning. "She's not a prostitute, she was telling me about a case her law firm has been working on and she wasn't lying," Cas said.

"Okay, well, I guess now is as good a time as any. In keeping with tonight's award show motif, I'd like to announce this evening's big twist ending!" Barney said, getting to his feet and drawing an envelope from his pocket. He spotted the vampire announcer and called him over. "Vampire Lou, would you do the honors?" The man took the envelope, opened it and read the card aloud.

""Mary's not really a prostitute,"" he said.

"What?" Marshall asked, frowning.

"That's all, Vampire Lou. Nicely done," Barney said, patting the mans shoulder.

"So she's not…?" Marshall asked.

"No. Mary's just a paralegal who lives in my building. Oh- ha-ha! And here's the best part- she has no idea that Ted thinks she's a hooker," he said, grinning. The table just stared at him. "Oh, come on. If you don't laugh, it just seems mean."

Cas shook her head and stood to go home.

* * *

She spent the entire next day working on her notes. Around two she stopped for lunch and went to the bar to order something. She saw the guys there so she went over and slid in next to Ted.

"That was not funny," Ted told Barney as Cas sat.

"Not funny, dude," Marshall repeated, shaking his head.

"I know," Barney said, acting like he was sad, then he looked up, grinning. "It was hilarious."

"Why would you do that?" Ted asked, frowning. By now Cas had realized they must be talking about Mary the Paralegal.

"I did it to prove a point," Barney said, shrugging.

"What point?" Ted asked, still a little angry.

"Stay with me," Barney said, making a show of forgetting the point. "It's going to come to me. No. Ah, okay, here's the point. You thought that Mary was a sure thing, right? So what happened? She took you up to a hotel room on the first date. All you have to do is be that confident with every girl you meet and your slump is over." Cas raised her brows in surprise. Barney actually did have a good point, though he had gone to the extremes to prove it.

"So the message is, I should treat every woman like a whore?" Ted asked, shaking his head.

"Come on, dude, you should be thanking me," Barney said, grinning.

"She slapped me and stormed off," Ted said, finishing off his drink.

"Can you blame her? You called her a hooker," Barney said, and Cas laughed along with Marshall and Barney.

"I'm sorry, dude, it was funny," Mashall said, catching Ted's glare.

"Yeah. Well, it's getting late," Ted said, sliding out of the booth. "I should get back to my room."

"Your room?" Barney asked in confusion.

"Yeah, that really expensive hotel room you put on your credit card- never checked out," Ted said, grinning now. "By the way, you know what's super fun? Pouring Dom Perignon down a bathtub drain. Well, it's almost 3:00. Got a massage. Toodles." He walked out of the bar and Cas couldn't help but laugh at the look on Barney's face.

"Come on, if you don't laugh, it just seems mean," Marshall said, and Cas laughed again, shaking her head.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

"I can't believe it," Lily said as Cas slid into the booth next to Robin and Barney, "We got Van Smoot House."

"It is on," Marshall said, grinning. "It is on! Like the former Soviet Republic of Azerbaijan."

"What?" Cas asked, not quite sure what they were talking about.

"Wow! You guys are getting married in two months," Ted said, and Cas realized that the Van Smoot House was that one mansion Lily always talked about that was right on the river.

"How are you going to get everything done?" Robin asked, sipping her beer.

"Division of labor. Everyone's got a job to do, so listen up," Lily said, leaning forward. "Okay, Robin, you and Ted go to the florist." She paused as Robin and Ted looked at each other. Things had been quite awkward between the two of them in the last few weeks. Lily had told her that Ted had kissed Robin while he was still dating Victoria, and, understandably, Robin had gotten mad when she found out about it. Robin didn't want to talk about it though, so Cas didn't bring it up. "Or, actually, Robin, why don't you go to the florist? And, Ted, I could use your keen architectural eye on... on the invitations." Cas sighed.

"Wow. That was really awkward, Lil," Barney said, grinning. "And still. It's still really awkward right now. Hey, what about me? What's my job? What do I get to do?"

"Okay, your job is very simple," Lily said, glad for the change of subject. "At the wedding, do not sleep with anyone even remotely related to me." Barney laughed, then his face grew serious.

"Lil, you know I can't promise that," he said, and Cas laughed with Robin.

"And Cas, can you help me with the cake tasting?" Lily asked, turning to her.

"Sure," Cas said, then hesitated. "And, did you find a dress?"

"No," Lily sighed. "I haven't thought about it since the last time we went shopping…"

"Okay, well then I have a surprise for you," Cas said, grinning. Last weekend she had used peroxide mixed with water and had been able to get the lingering yellow stain out of the wedding dress. After fixing the ripped hem inside, the dress looked almost perfect. "I'll meet you upstairs in an hour," she said, then stood and left, heading to the train to get the dress from her parents house.

She had been letting it hang in the living room so it didn't crease, but now she tucked it carefully into one of her mothers old garment bags, leaving the house only five minutes after she arrived, then taking a cab back to the train station then another back to her apartment. She rushed upstairs, knowing it had taken longer than an hour.

"Look, I... I can't sign off on a band I've never even seen," Lily was saying as Cas opened the door. "We... we don't even know if they can play our song. They're... they're going to have to come over here and audition."

"Baby, The 88 don't audition," Marshall said, shaking his head as Cas shut the door behind her. "They're, like, the Wiggles of wedding bands."

"Well, then... I have to say no," Lily said, sitting back down on the couch. She had various tiny plates of cakes in front of her, and different colors of material draped over the back of the couch.

"Baby, they're only holding the date until Monday," Marshall said.

"Well... well, are they playing anywhere this weekend?" Lily asked, getting up from the couch.

"Let me check their website," Marshall said, going over to the table where his computer sat.

"What?" Lily asked, seeing the look Ted was giving her.

"Lily, you're being a wee bit intense about this band thing," Ted said, and Cas shook her head. Ted should know by now that Lily was a little bit of a perfectionist.

"Intense?" Lily asked, her voice raising a little. "I have a wedding to plan in nine weeks for 200 people. Even if a dinosaur should poke his head out of my butt and consume this coffee table, I need you to roll with it, okay?"

"Wow," Ted said, shaking his head. Cas draped the garment bag over the back of the couch.

"Guys! I just tasted an amazing caterer," Barney said, coming in the door.

"We already have a caterer," Lily said, beginning to organize papers on the coffee table.

"Oh, right. You're getting married," Barney said, and Ted laughed. "You see what I did there? Took a…"

"It looks like The 88 are playing at a high school prom in New Jersey tomorrow," Marshall called from the table, cutting Barney off.

"A prom? Can... can we go to that? Lily asked, frowning.

"Yeah, we'll just call the high school, they'll let us stand in the back and watch," Marshall said. Lily walked over and dialed the number for the school, explained the situation, then hung up the phone.

"Yeah. No, they won't," Lily said, putting the phone back.

"Why not?" Marshall asked incredulously.

"'Cause it turns out we're not in high school," Lily said, her far growing worried again.

"No sweat, we'll just sneak in," Barney said, grinning.

"We're not sneaking in to a high school prom," Marshall said, the voice of reason for once.

"Yes, we are. It's the only way," Lily said, her face determined.

"You're getting on board with Barney's idea?" Ted asked. "Man, you really have snapped."

"It's nine weeks till the wedding," Lily said, as though that was a good enough reason. "At this point, I'd say yes to just about anything."

"Well…" Barney began suggestively, leaning closer to Lily.

"No, Barney," Lily said, not even looking at him.

"I'll go with you if you want," Cas said, and Lily turned to her as though she hadn't known she was there.

"Okay," Lily said, nodding. Cas picked up the garment bag.

"Also, I've been working on this for a while," she said, unzipping the bag. She pulled out the dress and turned it around, showing them the now cleanly white material.

"Oh my god," Lily said, coming over to lift it up. "How did you get that stain out? It was chocolate and raspberry!" Lily asked in awe, running her hands over the material.

"Well, turns out the raspberry didn't really get on the material, and I used a few tricks my mom taught me for getting stains out, and a bit of internet research got the material back to white. I know you are only supposed to dry clean this kind of material, but I used ice to get most of the chocolate out, and then peroxide and stain remover for the rest of it. And the hem you tore is on the inside, so no one will see the part I fixed," Cas explained, flipping the material up to show Lily the mend. It wasn't super obvious, but it was definitely not as good as a professionals would have been. She let the cloth fall back into place and gave Lily the dress. Lily carefully draped it over the couch then turned and threw her arms around Cas.

"Thank you so much!" Lily said into her hair. Cas patted her back.

"No problem," she said, smiling. Lily pulled away, wiping her eyes and Cas frowned. "I'm not crying, don't worry, I'm just over emotional," Lily said, correctly interpreting the look on Cas's face.

Cas laughed, then helped Lily try the different kinds of cake on the coffee table while Ted and Barney left for something and Marshall went to pick up the wedding invitations.

* * *

The next day around lunch, Lily called Cas to meet them at the bar. When she got there, Lily was explaining the crashing of the prom that night. Cas had hunted down an appropriate dress in her coat closet and brought it up to Lily's the previous night.

"I'll go with you," Robin was saying as Cas slid in next to her and Barney.

"Really?"

"Yeah. I never got to go to my prom," Robin said. "We always had field hockey nationals in the spring." Barney coughed obviously, drawing everyone's attention.

"Lesbian," he said, and Cas laughed.

"The cough is supposed to cover the "lesbian."' Robin said, rolling her eyes.

"No, I'm trying to start a thing where the cough is separate," Barney said.

"Do you think we look young enough to blend in at a high school?" Lily asked, her face creased with worry.

"Please, I'm ageless," Barney began, pointing to himself with a smirk. "Scherbatsky just needs a good night's sleep, Cas looks like a 12 year old, and you've got "statutory" written all over your body." Cas rolled her eyes, but didn't deny it. She still got carded almost every time she bought alcohol anywhere but here, plus she was shorter than most teenagers anyway.

"Hey, why don't we all go?" Ted suggested.

"I don't know…" Robin began, hesitant. "More people might be harder to sneak in. We don't want to mess things up for Lily."

"Yeah, you're right," Ted said, though they all knew Robin just didn't want Ted there. "Besides, Marshall and I have been planning on having a guy's night out before the wedding. Why don't we just make it tonight?"

"Sounds awesome. We should go out and just get freakin' weird." Marshal said, making a face.

"Yeah," Ted said, nodding.

"'Cause, you know, you be a bad, bad man, and I be an outlaw," Marshall said, and Cas laughed as he held up his hands in the shape of fake guns.

"Wow. Hey, Thelma, Louise, y'all don't drive off no cliffs now, ya hear? Lame!" Barney said, laughing, but then he leaned across Cas to whisper to Ted. "But seriously, leave me a message, and we'll meet up later."

Cas pushed him off of her jokingly, then finished off her beer.

"Let's go get ready," Lily said, sliding out of the booth. Robin and Cas stood too as Lily kissed Marshall goodbye, then followed her from the bar.

They had put on their dresses and done their hair and makeup by the time the guys came upstairs.

"All right, what do you think?" Lily asked as the three of them came out into the living room. All their dresses were long, Cas's was dark blue, Lily's light blue, and Robins was red.

"Horrible," Barney said, looking up from his phone.

"You're gonna make such a great dad," Lily said sarcastically.

"You look so classy and nice. You're going to stick out like a sore thumb," he said, shaking his head. "Have you seen how the kids are dressing these days, with the Ashlee and the Lindsay and the Paris? They all dress like strippers. It's go ho or go home."

"Well, we have to get in. I have to see this band, 'cause we have to make a decision by Monday, 'cause I'm getting married in 71 days, and we still don't have…" Lily began ranting.

"Shh. Sweetie, just focus on one thing at a time, okay?" Robin said, grabbing Lily's shoulders. "Right now, you just have to dress like a whore and that's it."

"All right," Lily said, nodding a little.

"That's the spirit. Now, ladies, slut up!" Barney said, and Cas rolled her eyes. They went back into Lily's room to go through the other dresses Robin had brought, and the ones stored in the back of Lily's closet that she never wore.

"I never thought this would be a bad thing, but my wardrobe just isn't slutty enough," Robin said, frowning at her dresses.

"I didn't know I still had this," Lily said, pulling out a black dress with pink flowers over one shoulder.

"What?" Robin asked, turning around.

"The dress I wore to my actual prom," Lily said, smiling a little, then she glanced at Cas. "Want to borrow it? I know you don't have any other dresses here, or did you have one at home that might work?"

"No, the only other one I have is the one I wore to Robin's award ceremony, and it's too classy. You don't mind if I wear it?" Cas asked, taking the dress from her. It was a little old fashioned, but it was a high school prom, no one would notice.

"No, go ahead," Lily said, pulling out another dress. Cas stripped off the dark blue one and pulled on Lily's dress, then straightened it and looked down. It fit alright, though it wasn't something Cas would usually like wearing. She had brought simple black heels to wear with her other dress, so they still went with this one. She left her long hair down, hanging straight down her back.

Robin found a short black dress that looked similar to Cas's, and Lily eventually found a short flowery one. They walked out into the living room to be judged again.

"Nice," Barney said, nodding. "You ladies look good, but your outfits are missing just one thing." He disappeared into the kitchen as Cas sighed again.

"No, Barney, this is as far as we're going to go," Robin said, tugging her dress farther down her legs. "I'm not showing anymore…"

"Three beautiful flowers for three beautiful flowers," Barney said, carrying corsages back into the room for them.

"Aw. Sweet," Lily said as he put one around her wrist and turned to Cas. She smiled.

"Thank you," she said when hers was situated. He turned to Robin to put hers on for her.

"Oh, Robin, are you tearing up?" Lily asked as Robin wiped underneath her eyes.

"No," she denied, then sniffed. "I've never been to prom before, okay?"

"We got to go. See ya," Lily said, waving to Ted and Marshall.

"Bye, have fun. See you," Ted said, and the four of them left the apartment. They took a cab all the way to New Jersey, even though it was a little expensive. At the high school they followed the line of highschoolers to the entrance, Cas walking a little ahead of them since she wasn't paying attention to their conversation. She walked past the security guards and into the entry hall before she noticed that the others weren't right behind her. She turned to see them outside the doors, talking. They walked up as a little group, but were turned away by the guards. Cas laughed. This was the first time she was glad to look like a twelve year old girl. Lily and Robin came in five minutes later on the arms of two high school boys who looked like nerds.

"How did you get in?" Lily asked as they came to a stop next to her.

"I just walked in," Cas said, shrugging. "Where's Barney?"

"He said he would find a way in," Robin said, looking around the room. Lily left the group to talk to the band, and Cas turned to look at Robin, who had just taken a drink out of a flask one of the boys had with him. She shook her head, then turned back to see Lily coming back through the crowd.

"We need the sheet music for Good Feeling," Lily said. Robin pulled out her phone.

"I'll call Marshall," she said, dialing. "Hey, it's Robin. Um, Lily needs you to download the sheet music for "Good Feeling" and bring it out here, like, now," Robin said once Marshall had picked up. "Uh, I don't know. Things have been so weird between us," she said, and Cas was distracted from the conversation as she noticed Barney climbing through a vent at the top of the gym wall. She smothered her laugh as he fell through only to immediately be spotted by some security guards. They carried him away when he tried to run. "He lied and told me he broke up with his girlfriend to try to hook up with me. I mean, I know he apologized for it but it's just, it's not easy to forgive. Look, if you absolutely must bring Ted, it's, it's not like I'm going to claw my own eyes out if he comes." Cas was brought back to the conversation just as Robin hung up the phone. "All right, sheet music's on the way," Robin said as Lily came over to them.

"Are you okay?" Cas asked, seeing Lily's face.

"There's just so much to do for this wedding. My head is swirling. It's just all moving too fast," she said, shaking her head.

"Don't worry, everything will be okay," Cas said, leading Lily over to sit on the bleachers as they waited for Marshall and Ted. They watched the dancing couples for a while, then Robin and Lily went to the bathrooms. Cas saw Marshall and Ted come in and stood to go over to them, but Marshall broke away to talk to the band. She stopped beside Ted, then looked over at the mascot and grinned when she saw that it was Barney.

"You know, there's probably a back door you could have used," she said, laughing. He grumbled for her to shut up and over behind the bleachers to shed the uniform. He came back up to them and Ted wandered off to find Marshall.

"Can we talk for a minute," Cas asked Barney, not looking at him.

"Yeah, sure, what's up?" He asked, straightening his tie. She looked around for a quieter place to talk, but all the corners were occupied by highschoolers kissing or talking. She grabbed his hand and led him out to the dance floor, and turned when they were in the middle. His hand went to her waist as her arms wound around his shoulders like the pairs around them. She had been thinking about this for a few weeks now, and she had decided that being in a friends with benefits relationship with Barney, like they had been, was doing more harm than good to her. She glanced around them, noting where all their friends were and if they were paying attention, then she leaned up onto her toes to kiss Barney. He stooped a little, kissing her back, but she pulled away.

"Can we go back to being just friends?" She asked nervously. "You know, without the benefits part?" She didn't want to make him mad, or make him not want to be her friend anymore, but she also didn't want to explain to him exactly why she didn't want the benefits part.

He looked down at her for a moment, his face confused, and for a second she thought he was going to walk away from her, but then he smiled.

"Yeah, we can," he said, and they resumed their slow dance. She smiled. "Why?" He asked, and she sighed.

"I just think it's a bad idea," she said quietly, looking to the side.

"Why now though?" He asked, and she really wished he would drop the subject.

"I just think it's going to end up with someone getting hurt," she said at last. It was true, eventually she would get hurt over his antics, and she wanted to stop that from happening.

"Aww," he said in a joking voice, trying to lighten the mood. "Don't tell me you have feeling for me now," he said. She knew he was joking, but her heart skipped a beat as she considered saying yes for half a second, then her pulse picked up and her cheeks turned red. She looked away from him, trying not to let him see her face. "Cas?" He asked, but she didn't know what to say. She pulled her arms away from his neck and took a step back as the song ended.

"No, I don't," she said, but she didn't look at him. She hated lying, she hated it when other people did it to her, and when she did it herself, but sometimes it was better to lie a little, to save a friendship. She spotted Lily and Robin and walked toward them, leaving Barney near the edge of the dance floor.

"Cas, are you alright?" Robin asked when she got near them.

"Yeah I'm fine, why?" Cas said, smiling.

"Your face is red," Lily said.

"Oh, yeah well, its warm in here," she said, and was distracted from having to talk further by a fight breaking out near the door.

"Oh my god, is that Ted?" Lily asked as one of the boys in the fight was tackled. The security guards came in and led them all outside, including Barney who had been standing near his abandoned turtle costume.

"I think that was Marshall too," Cas said, noticing the taller man beside the security guards. Robin shook her head. The band started the next song with an announcement.

"This one goes out to that redhead girl and that tall guy," the lead singer said, then they began playing the song Lily had wanted them to play. Just as it began, Marshall and Ted came back inside, and Lily went over to dance with Marshall as Cas headed toward the bleachers. She saw Ted and Robin dance as well, and smiled, glad they were making up. Cas was ready to go home, she was done with the day. She headed toward the door, willing to sit outside while she waited for the others to be ready to leave. She walked around the corner of the building only to see Barney talking to two of the highschoolers.

"And that, my friends, is why you don't get your moneys worth when you wear jeans to a strip club," he said, and the two boys on the bench nodded, eyes wide with awe. Cas rolled her eyes.

"Stop corrupting the children," she said, coming up behind him. He turned and laughed.

"Cas, they're boys, they're already corrupted, I'm just giving them some advice," Barney said and the other two nodded.

"Scat," Cas said, glaring at them. They jumped up and left immediately and she sat down on the empty bench with a sigh.

"Way to scare them off," Barney said, sitting down next to her.

"Teenagers are annoying," Cas said, leaning back against the bricks of the building. "Especially teenage boys."

"All kids are annoying," Barney said.

"Nah, they are cute when they are little. Then they grow up into miniature yous and become annoying," she said, smirking.

"I'm not annoying," he protested. Cas smiled.

"You're right, the more accurate word would be obnoxious," she said. He huffed. She played with the flowers on her wrist with her fingers, smiling. Her date hadn't brought a corsage when she had gone to prom in high school, and the whole night had just been terrible. At least this one was less terrible, she had actually sort of had fun, besides the sort of breaking up with Barney. He didn't seem upset at all about it, which sort of hurt her a little, but she was glad he hadn't brought it back up out here, though she could feel him watching her now. She glanced over at him with one eyebrow raised.

"What?" She asked.

"Don't you want to get laid on your prom night?" He asked, though his voice was joking. She rolled her eyes and elbowed him in the ribs. He gasped in shock, then covered his ribs with his arm to shield them from any further attacks. She smiled, glad that things weren't awkward between them now and that they could go back to being friends the way they used to be.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

Cas was at the bar, as usual, with the group minus Robin. As Ted explained why he had skipped the date with his so called soul mate, she sighed.

"So... what do you think?" Ted asked the table at large. Everyone groaned.

"Robin again?" Barney asked, shaking his head. Cas smiled. She had been told in the past about how big of a romantic Ted was but she hadn't fully realized just how sappy he was until just then. It was almost sweet. "Ted, the universe clearly does not want you and Robin to be together. Don't piss off the universe. The universe will slap you."

"But don't you think the universe has more important things to worry about than my dating life?" Ted asked.

"Unless," Marshall began with a tone of awe. "Unless your dating life is the glue holding the entire universe together... Whoa. Chills. Anybody else get chills?" Cas shook her head and the rest ignored him.

"Look, I realize we've been down this road before, but the fact is, whatever I do, it all keeps coming back to Robin, so... I gotta do this," Ted said, then Barney reached across the table and slapped him quickly. "Ow! What the hell?"

"That wasn't me. That was the universe," Barney said, and Cas laughed.

"Dude, he's right," Marshall said. "How many times do you have to watch this crash and burn before you say, "enough"?"

"One more," Ted said dramatically. "One more time. One more big, beautiful, stupid romantic gesture. And then, whatever she says, yes or no, that's it. If it's yes, great. If it's no, then I am done going after Robin forever."

"So what's this big, beautiful romantic gesture?" Lily asked, and they all leaned in as Ted did, as though hearing a secret.

"I am going to make her... a mix CD," he said, and they all gave him a blank stare. "No, I'm kidding. I got a plan. Lily, I'm going to need the spare key to Robin's apartment."

"I see where this is going," Barney said, sitting back again. "Ted, waiting naked in a girl's bed wearing whipped cream undies does not work... usually. The setting- Martha's Vineyard, 1999. The characters: Yours truly and a raven-haired au pair by the name…" Lily reached across the table to slap him this time and Cas laughed again.

"Universe," Lily said, smirking. "So, this plan you speak of?"

"Remember the first night Robin and I went out?" He asked, and everyone nodded. "I stole a blue French horn for her and it almost worked.

"Yeah," Marshall said. "Dude, that was awesome, but how are you ever going to top that?"

"I'm going to hire a string quartet, and have them waiting in Robins apartment when she comes home from work, and, get this, the instruments will be blue. And I'm going to buy roses, and chocolate, and be waiting in her apartment," Ted explained. Cas smiled.

"Aww," Lily said.

"Barf," Barney replied.

"I'll get you the key, I have it upstairs," Lily said, sliding out of the booth. Everyone got ready to leave so Cas stood too, deciding to actually get some work done for the next week. The next day at the bar, Lily and Robin were both absent, so Cas slid into the booth next to Marshall. Lily had called her earlier that morning, worried about Ted, since Robin had turned down his big romantic gesture. Cas had shaken her head. It had to have been clear to Robin how much Ted loved her, it was obvious to everyone else, but Robin either didn't feel the same way and was too afraid to tell Ted that there was no way it would ever happen, or she felt the same way and was too afraid to tell Ted. Either way, Robin kept giving Ted hope for a relationship, then pulling the rug out at the last moment. She almost wondered why Ted still tried to win her over, she would have given up on it by now if she were in Ted's shoes.

"Nice try, buddy. Good hustle out there," Barney said with fake sympathy.

"Look at the bright side," Marshall said, patting Ted's shoulder. "At least you got some closure. She's made her choice and you can finally move on."

"Screw that," Ted said, and Cas sighed. "This ain't over."

"Ted, you sat here in this very booth and you said…" Marshall began.

"I don't care what I said," Taid interrupted, cutting him off. "This is gonna happen. She can't say it's not meant to be. It is meant to be, and you know why? 'Cause I mean it to be." He stood up and went to the bar as Lily came in. Cas stood to let her sit by Marshall, but noticed the anxious look on Lily's face, so Cas went up to the bar too and ordered another drink. As she waited, she half listened to Barney and Ted, and watched Lily and Marshall. They were arguing over something, which, in itself was weird, since they never seemed to argue about anything.

"Ted, she is going on that camping trip," Barney was saying to Ted. "Dude, barring some act of God, Robin's gonna be with Sandy this weekend."

"Fine," Ted said in a determined voice. Cas looked over at him in surprise. "If an act of God is what it takes, then an act of God it is."

"What are you talking about?" Barney asked, frowning.

"I'm gonna make it rain," Ted said simply. "I can't let Robin go camping with this guy. So how do I keep that from happening? Simple... I make it rain!"

"Ted, do you want me to slap you again? 'Cause I kind of enjoyed it the first time," Barney said as Cas accepted her drink from Carl the bartender.

"Look, I-I might be crazy right now... No, you know what? I am definitely crazy right now, but I have a plan," Ted said, smiling now. "That girl you used to go out with, Penelope, wasn't she getting her PhD in Native American culture?"

"Yeah," Barney said slowly.

"Are you still in touch with her?" Ted asked.

"Sure. I mean, even though we stopped having sex, we still get together, like, once a month to chat and catch up, and of course I'm not in touch with her!" Barney said.

"Well, you're gonna need to get in touch with her," Ted said. "She's gonna teach me how to do a rain dance."

"Did you just say a "rain dance"?" Barney asked.

"Yes, Barney; A rain dance," Ted said.

"A dance to make it rain," Barney repeated.

"Yes," Ted said. Barney stared at him for a moment, then slapped him again. Ted slapped him back, and they started a little slapping fight, like how high school girls fought in movies. Cas laughed as they walked out of the bar, yelling at each other.

She went back over to Marshall and Lily, just in time for Marshall to leave the bar, looking upset.

"Hey, Lily, um, is everything okay?" Cas asked, sliding into the booth.

"Yeah," Lily said, then sighed. "Well, no, not really. I applied for a summer art fellowship, and I got in."

"That's great Lily," Cas said, not understanding.

"It's in San Fransisco," Lily said, frowning.

"Oh," Cas said, her smile dropping. "But, what about the wedding?"

"I was never going to take it," Lily said, looking up. "I just wanted to know that I could. I wanted to see if my art was good enough, and it was!"

"So, what's the problem then, if you aren't going to take it?" Cas asked.

"Well, now I sort of want to," Lily said. "I just… I've never done any of the things I wanted to do in college, and now I have this amazing opportunity… I don't know."

"I'm not very good at advice," Cas began, resting a hand on Lily's arm for comfort. "But Lily, if I had someone who loved me as much as Marshall loves you… I wouldn't throw that away. Not for anything."

"I'm not throwing it away…" Lily said, but her heart wasn't in her words. "I just… what if I'm supposed to do this?"

"What if you aren't?" Cas countered. "Look, I'm not going to tell you what to do, but we will all miss you, Marshall most of all."

"I know," Lily said with a sigh. "I need to go talk to Marshall." She stood and left, leaving Cas alone at the bar with her drink.

* * *

The next morning she awoke to the sound of her door slamming shut. She jumped out of bed to see who was there, but it was just Lily, half soaked with rain.

"Lily?" Cas asked, going over to her. Then she noticed the suitcase.

"I broke up with Marshall," Lily said, then started crying. "I'm going to San Francisco."

"Oh, Lily," Cas said, hugging the girl as she cried. "When are you leaving?" She asked when Lily had calmed down.

"My flight leaves in two hours… you aren't mad?" Lily asked as Cas handed her a towel to dry her hair on.

"Of course I'm not mad, if you feel like you need to do this, then that's what you need to do," Cas said, putting a kettle on to boil water for tea.

"Thank you," Lily said, draping the towel over the closest chair and sitting down in it. Cas went behind the divider screen of her bedroom and pulled on yesterdays jeans and a clean t-shirt, then a sweater, then went back to the kitchen as the water boiled.

"Here," she said, setting a glass of tea in front of Lily.

"Thanks," she mumbled, then sipped. They sat in silence for a moment. "Will you do me a favor?" Lily asked, looking up at her.

"Of course," Cas answered.

"Can you look out for Marshall for me? Just, make sure he doesn't do anything drastic," Lily said.

"I will," Cas promised. "Do you want me to come with you to the airport?"

"No," Lily said, shaking her head. "This is something I need to do alone."

"I understand," Cas said. "You'd better go though, if you want to make your flight." Lily nodded and stood, gave Cas one last hug, and was gone. Cas sighed, dumping out the half full cup of tea, then she glanced at her clock. Had Lily snuck out before Marshall woke up? Did he know yet? He would be devastated. She slipped on her shoes and sprinted through the rain to his building, covering her eyes with her hand. She stopped dead. He was sitting on the steps up to his apartment, in the rain, completely soaked.

"Marshall," she said, and he looked up sadly. He held up Lily's engagement ring and tried to smile. Cas sat beside him on the steps and wrapped an arm around his back, then sat in silence with him in the rain. Ted arrived from a cab an hour later and understood what had happened immediately. The three of them sat on the steps, staring out at the rain for a long time.

"Come on guys," Ted said at last. "Lets get dried off." He stood, then dragged Marshall to his feet. Cas stood too, then glanced back at her apartment, wondering if she should go home and change or stay with Marshall. She glanced at Ted who gave her a small smile and nodded toward her apartment. She smiled, then turned as Ted led Marshall into the building and went to her own apartment. The rain was beginning to let up a little, and the wind was dying down enough that it would be reasonable to use an umbrella, so she changed, towel dried her hair, grabbed her jacket and purse, and left the apartment, unfolding her umbrella as she hit the street, even though it was only a two minute walk back. She got to the building just as Robin did. Robin was grinning as they both entered the hallway, so Cas assumed she hadn't heard.

"Robin," she said, making them both pause right outside Marshall's door.

"Hey! So, did you hear the big news?" She asked, and Cas shook her head, though she guessed it was that she and Ted had gotten together, finally.

"Lily and Marshall broke up. Lily moved to San Francisco," she said, and Robin's face dropped.

"Oh my god," she said as Cas pushed open their apartment door and walked in. The spotted Marshall on the couch, still in his wet clothes, looking heartbroken. "I'm so sorry Marshall. What happened?"

"Well, she left," Marshall said, lifting his arms in a halfhearted shrug. "And I don't even know if she's coming back." Barney ran in the door then.

"I didn't get your message until I woke up," he said, looking concerned. He sat on the other side of Marshall. "Bro, I am so sorry."

"Thanks," Marshall said.

"I know it must be tough," Barney said, patting Marshall's shoulder. "But are you ready to hear something that will not only make you feel better but will actively excite you?"

"Sure," Marshall said, looking up.

"For the first time ever, the three of us are single at the same time," Cas glanced at Robin who exchanged a look with Ted. So she had been right about that. "I've dreamed about this day boys and it's going to be legendary! Together, we will own this city. Any time, a girl wants to get back at her ex-boyfriend, we'll be there. Any time a girl wants to solve her father issues through promiscuity and binge-drinking, we will be there. Any time a bachelorette party drives through the city in a limo sticking their heads out, shouting "What's up New York?" we will be what is up New York! Gentlemen, we are about to embark on…" he paused, looking at Robin, then at Ted, then back at Robin. "Oh man, you guys did it, didn't you?" Cas smacked his leg from where she was sitting on the floor. Marshall looked at Ted, who shrugged. Barney threw his hands up in defeat and stalked into the kitchen.

"Okay, come on Marshall," Cas said, getting to her feet. "You need to change out of those clothes before you get sick." Marshall made no move to get up. Cas put her hands on her hips. "Don't make me change you." He sighed and stood, then walked into his room and shut the door. "Ted?" She asked, looking down. He sighed and stood, then went to make sure Marshall wasn't just moping on his bed in the rain soaked clothes.

The day passed quickly, all five of them staying at the apartment until they absolutely had to leave. Ted and Robin were sickening, and neither one of them had to work that day. Cas was done with work for the summer, since the school was done until fall. Barney had called in to work that day for both himself and Marshall.

Marshall stayed in bed for most of the next week, only getting up to go to work, where, according to Barney, he moped around like a ghost, then he would come home and go straight back to bed. Cas felt bad for him. Ted and Robin were almost as bad. It was hard to go to the bar with them, they would just end up making out, and Barney would go hit on girls, so Cas would just drink across the table from the couple, rolling her eyes.

The monotony of their new routine finally broke for her, three weeks into summer vacation.

"Guys," Cas said, grinning as she slid into the booth next to Barney across from Ted and Robin. "You'll never guess what just happened." She paused as they leaned in. "The college is paying for me to go to a psychology convention. In London. I'm staying there for a month."

"A month?" Robin asked.

"Yeah, well, the college is paying for the convention, but after that I'm taking a class offered by Kendra Cherry," she said excitedly. They gave her blank looks. "She's the one who wrote that paper about Erik Erikson's theories of psychosocial development…" the blank looks continued. "It was the most popular and highly rated article of the year…" they all shook their heads. She sighed. "She's… really smart." She settled for that. They all nodded, pretending to understand. She shook her head. "Anyway, Kendra Cherry is teaching a three week crunch class based on Erikson's theory of psychosocial development and how it continues to develop over our life span depending on what situations we experience and how that affects our sense of self…" she had lost them again. She shook her head. "Sorry, I'm just really excited."

"No kidding," Ted said. "Sometimes I forget you have a doctorate in long, difficult to understand words."

"I can dumb it down for you," she said, and he nodded. "There's this nice lady who's going to tell me all about people." He rolled his eyes.

"So when are you leaving?" Robin asked.

"Oh, um, on Friday," Cas said, looking at them sheepishly. "It was all last minute. Sorry to skip out on babysitting duty," she said. After the first two weeks of Marshall hardly getting out of bed, they had come to refer to the job of making sure he ate and didn't run off somewhere, babysitting duty. They all took turns at it, though Ted and Robin had it more often than Cas and Barney, since they were both there more often.

"It's fine, we can handle it," Ted said. "Wow, London."

"I know," Cas said, grinning. "I need to go pack," she said, jumping up. She said good bye to them, then went back to her apartment and hunted her large suitcase out of her coat closet. She had so much to do in the next three days. She set her suitcase on the coffee table, then pulled out an old notebook and started a list so she wouldn't forget anything.

Friday afternoon rolled around, and before she knew it she was sitting at the bar, her suitcase and carry-on waiting by her apartment door, and having a last drink with the group, minus Lily of course. Even Marshall had come down, though he looked miserable.

"My phone won't work over there, but I'll still have email, in case anything huge happens," she said, finishing off her last beer. She glanced at her watch. She still had two and a half hours until her flight left, but she didn't want to even chance missing it. She stood, smiling, and the rest of them stood with her to hug her goodbye, and then she was in the cab, her suitcase beside her. Then she was at the airport, through security, her suitcase checked, then she was boarding the plane. And in what felt like no time at all, she was in the air, heading toward England. She sighed, a little bit of the excitement wearing off when she realized it would be an entire month until she saw any of her friends again. She closed her eyes and leaned her head against the back of her seat, hoping to pass the flight by sleeping, instead of thinking about how much she was going to miss everyone.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter Thirteen

Cas let out her breath as the plane jolted, touching the concrete. She wasn't sure if she was relieved, or nervous. Her month long London stay had been extended by two weeks, and she already missed the wonderful city, but she was glad to be home. Already she could feel herself falling back into the working life, rather than the carefree tourist she had been in England. She wouldn't be nervous to be home… if not for the fact that she wasn't alone. In London Cas had not only attended the convention and class she had wanted to, she had also met someone. A male someone. A very intelligent, handsome, kind, male someone. A male someone who had decided to study abroad for the semester, in New York City. He had also decided to come to New York City two weeks before the semester started, which was most of the reason she had changed her departure date.

"Are you alright?" He asked from beside her. She smiled softly, still enjoying his accent though she had heard it every day for the last month and a half.

"I'm fine," she said, looking over at him as the plane was taxied into the terminal. "I'm just a little nervous about you meeting my friends," she said.

"They won't like me?" he asked, tilting his head to one side.

"No, I'm sure they will, they just have a tendency to be a little… intense," she said, not sure that was the right word.

"Don't worry, they won't scare me off," he said, and she smiled. That was the main reason she was nervous about introducing him to the gang. She was by far the most easy going of the group, in her opinion anyway, and her relationship with Daniel, her very attractive seat neighbor, was too new for her to be able to guess how he would react to them.

"Well, I just want you to be prepared," she said, sighing again as they waited for the seat belt light to turn off. "Normally, Marshall and Lily would do some kind of Spanish inquisition, but Lily's in California, so I don't know how that will go. And Ted will probably be really over dramatic about everything, and Barney will make crude jokes to try to embarrass you. Robin's okay most of the time." She smiled as he reached over to take her hand. "Just don't take anything they say personally."

"I'll be fine," Daniel said, rubbing his thumb over the back of her hand. The flight attendants began popping open the overhead compartments and people began to get up and grab their bags. Daniel, being more than a foot taller than Cas, was able to reach over the other passengers and grab their small carry on's, then they slowly made their way out of the plane and into the terminal. Cas hadn't told any of her friends she was coming back today, mostly because she wasn't sure until yesterday if she was flying back today or next week, so no one was waiting to pick her up at the airport, which was fine. The two of them found the luggage claim and got their bags, then found a taxi, Cas giving the driver the address of Columbia's student housing, where Daniel would be living for the next six months.

She helped him take in his luggage and find the right dormitory, then she left him with a kiss and a smile, and a promise to meet up the next day. It wasn't too late, the sun was still up, but both of them were exhausted from the traveling and the time change. Cas took the taxi the rest of the way back to her apartment and dragged her things inside, looking around. She had payed the electricity and water bills, so everything had stayed on while she was away. There was a lot more dust than normal, but for being gone a month and a half, the place didn't look that bad. She left her suitcase by the door, deciding she would unpack later, and hunted through her drawers for some pajamas. She fell into bed, exhausted.

* * *

The next morning she woke up at five, which in her opinion, was way too early to be up, but she couldn't go back to sleep. She hunted through her cupboards and sighed. She had gotten rid of all the food that would spoil, which left her with dried oatmeal, a can of chicken soup, and some probably stale saltines. Grocery shopping would have to be the first thing she did. She hadn't eaten anything since lunch the day before, which didn't really count because it was airplane food. She didn't bother changing out of the sweat pants and tank top she had worn to bed. For early August it was very warm out. She glanced in the mirror to make sure the ponytail she had slept in wasn't too messed up, then grabbed her purse and left, not bothering to lock the door behind her since she was just running down the street to a little convenience store.

She returned half an hour later with two large paper bags, and was halfway to her table to set them down when she noticed the person on her couch.

"Lily?" Cas asked, staring at the woman.

"Hey," Lily said, smiling a little. Cas set down her bags, then turned to look at her.

"What are you doing here?" Cas asked, starting to smile. She hadn't known Lily was back in town, but she was glad to see her.

"Oh well, I just got back, and I didn't really have anywhere else to go," Lily said, standing. She looked sheepish, as though Cas was going to throw her out. Instead she smiled and stepped forward to hug her. Lily smiled, relaxing at last.

"You just got back? How was your art program? Your hair looks great by the way," Cas said, grinning.

"Thanks. My plane got in this morning," Lily said, then she gave a wide smile. "My art program was so great, I had the best summer of my life," Lily said, and Cas raised an eyebrow. Lily was lying, like, hardcore lying, which for Lily was something Cas hadn't known she was even able to do. Cas didn't say anything, not wanting Lily to be uncomfortable. "You had a suitcase packed when I got here, are you going somewhere? I can go to Robin's if you have plans," Lily said, glancing at the door nervously.

"No, no, it's fine," Cas said, beginning to unpack her groceries. "I actually just got back. I've been in London for the last six weeks."

"Wow, London?" Lily said, smiling a real smile this time. "I'd love to go there someday."

"It's so great there, I love it. I just got in last night so I haven't had a chance to unpack yet," Cas explained, pulling out a carton of eggs. "Do you want some breakfast?"

"I'd love some," Lily said, coming over to stand near the table. "Airport food is just not good."

"Oh I know," Cas said, smiling. She had really really missed this. She set the eggs aside and dug out a pan to fry them in, then pulled out bread to make toast. When the table was cleared she set out plates, making sure her eggs weren't burning, and poured orange juice. When everything was done, she sat next to Lily and they ate in silence.

"So does anyone know you're back in town?" Cas asked as she finished her toast.

"No, I didn't want to tell anyone," Lily said, though Cas knew she meant Marshall.

"Well, you can come to the bar tonight, I'm sure everyone would love to see you," Cas said. Lily sighed and shook her head.

"I don't have anywhere to live yet, I don't have a job… I just want to get on my feet before talking to… anyone," Lily said.

"I understand," Cas said. "You are welcome to stay here if you want, though I only have the couch to offer. Robin has a spare room, I know she'd let you stay there if you wanted to. Otherwise, you can stay at my parent's house on Staten Island until you find a place."

"I think I'll talk to Robin," Lily said, smiling her thanks. "Hey, would you want to go apartment hunting with me today? I've been looking online and there are two places open, I could call the landlords," Lily said.

"Sure," Cas said, also smiling. She didn't have any plans until later that night when she had promised to meet up with Daniel.

"Great," Lily said, smiling. "So how was your summer? What did you do in London?"

"Oh it was great," Cas said, smiling again. "I went for a psychologists convention, then I took this three week class, it was incredible. I was supposed to come back two weeks ago, but I stayed to do some touristy sight seeing."

"Sight seeing, huh?" Lily asked suggestively. "Were there any nice local boys to take you around?"

"Maybe," Cas said, grinning now.

"Oh, please tell," Lily said, leaning in to gossip.

"Well, I might have brought one back with me," Cas said, and Lily gasped. "You can meet him tonight if you come to the bar," Cas said, then noticed Lily's smile fade a little. "Or maybe we can meet him for lunch." Lily's smile brightened again.

"I'd love that," Lily said, smiling. "God I've missed you guys so much!"

"We all missed you too," Cas said, smiling.

"So, fill me in on the gossip I've missed," Lily said, getting up to help Cas wash the plates from breakfast.

"Well, I don't really know any of it, I've missed the last six weeks worth," Cas said. When the plates were clean, Cas lifted her suit case to the bed to start unpacking it. "Ted and Robin are dating, or they were last I heard and I think Robin would have emailed me if they had broken up."

"That's great, it's about time they got together," Lily said, sitting on the couch again while Cas sorted through her clothes. "So this boy you brought back with you… are you two dating?" Cas smiled automatically.

"Yeah, we are," Cas said. It still felt weird to her to say she had a boyfriend after going her entire life avoiding the commitment the term implied, but she was also happy to be able to say that. "He's wonderful," she continued. "His name is Daniel. We met in the class I took there, he's studying Psychology too. He transferred to Columbia for the semester."

"A college guy?" Lily asked, and Cas could hear the curiosity.

"He's not like a college aged boy," she said, clarifying. "He's 27, like me, and he went to law school for three years, then decided he hated it and started majoring in behavioral science."

"Aren't you not allowed to date your professors when you're in college?" Lily asked, and Cas almost sighed. The 'new boyfriend/girlfriend questioning' was beginning.

"I'm not a professor, it doesn't count, and he won't be one of my patients, so that doesn't matter either," Cas said, shoving the empty suitcase under her bed. She pulled out her phone to text Daniel, inviting him out for lunch with Lily, and sending him another warning about her incessant questioning.

"Very true," Lily said, her attention wandering as she stared blankly at the tv and yawned.

"If you want you can take a nap," Cas said. "You can use my bed if you want. I'm going to be in and out doing laundry and cleaning. I can wake you up for lunch if you want."

"That sounds great. I hate flying, I never sleep well on planes," Lily said, standing up. Cas gathered all her dirty clothes and threw them into her hamper, then headed to the door. The laundry, shared by the whole building, was in the basement behind the weird creepy psychic place downstairs. The air in the room always smelled like incense and perfume. Cas loaded her clothes and started the machine, then headed back upstairs to start getting rid of the dust that had gathered on almost everything. By the time she got back upstairs, Lily was already asleep.

* * *

They arrived at one of Cas's favorite cafe's, a few blocks away from the university, earlier than planned, but Daniel was already waiting for them. He stood and smiled when they were led to his table, and kissed Cas on the cheek, then held his hand out to Lily as Cas took her seat.

"It's nice to meet you," he said, and Lily returned the smile.

"Daniel, this is Lily. Lily, Daniel," Cas said, making the introductions as a waiter brought them all glasses of water.

"Ah, I've heard a lot about you," Daniel said, and Lily raised an eyebrow at Cas. She gave a tiny shrug. "Cas told me you were in California."

"I just got back," Lily explained, nodding.

"She also said you are an artist?" He asked, trying to make polite conversation. Lily brightened and Cas almost let out a sigh of relief as she launched into her summer stories about her art program. Daniel glanced at her with an eyebrow raised as though to say 'see? I'm doing just fine' and she patted his knee. The meal passed with most of the conversation coming from Lily, and before the woman had set in on her usual questioning of new boyfriends, Daniel said that he had to go for an early orientation for foreign exchange students. He payed the bill, which Cas would probably berate him for later, and left, shaking Lily's hand again and kissing Cas goodbye.

"Wow," Lily said when the two of them hit the streets. It was a two mile walk back to Cas's apartment, but it was nice out, not too hot, and they had decided to walk.

"I know," Cas said, smiling. Daniel had that impression on almost everybody he met, including her. He had a tendency to just sort of know exactly what to say in any given situation to make the other person feel comfortable and interesting, it was how she had gotten to know him.

"He seems really great, and I love that he payed for lunch and everything, and he's smart, and god, what a nice accent," Lily said. "And he's hot," she said, bumping her shoulder into Cas's.

"I know," she replied, grinning.

"So are you over Barney then?" Lily asked. Cas rolled her eyes.

"I told you that was just a crush," Cas said.

"And I took that as a polite lie between friends," Lily said, smiling knowingly.

"Lily, seriously, nothing is going on there," Cas said. "I haven't even seen him in like two months, and he obviously didn't care enough to email me or anything while I was gone, so-"

"Ha, I knew it," Lily said, and Cas sighed as they walked. "You are hurt that he didn't email you."

"No, I was just saying there's nothing going on there," Cas insisted.

"Okay, if you say so," Lily said. Cas frowned as she walked but didn't continue the conversation.

"So, I was thinking that we should talk to Robin today," Cas said. "You need an apartment, and I don't really know anything about apartments, I've lived in the same one for eight years. Plus, I don't think you will want to sleep on my couch, though it is pretty comfortable."

"I was going to suggest that too," Lily said, sighing. Cas knew she was worried about Robin's reaction, since Lily had left without telling her. She wanted to tell Lily it would be fine, but she wasn't sure whether Robin was angry or not. "But I think I should talk to her alone first, just in case she's mad."

"Okay," Cas said, nodding. "I was planning on going to the bar tonight, I was going to introduce Daniel to the gang."

"Okay. I'll go to Robin's tonight, and I'll let you know how it goes. Can I leave my suitcases at your place? You know… just in case…" Lily trailed off, not wanting to say just in case Robin didn't want her there.

"Of course," Cas said. They walked in silence for a while.

"So, did you lose weight in London? You look more fit," Lily said, and Cas laughed.

"Everything was so hectic trying to settle in and get used to the culture change, I just walked everywhere for the first few weeks. I have trouble sleeping in new places, so I started going to the gym on the campus of the university at night," Cas aid, smiling. "Plus, having a boyfriend made me a little more motivated to try to stay in shape."

"I see," Lily said, smiling. "So what about your no dating rule?"

"Well, it had to go sometime, I don't want to die alone," Cas said, then laughed. "Plus, as far as boyfriends go, Daniel has been a really good one."

"And it must be a little serious if you are introducing him to all of us," Lily said, then frowned at the term. She wasn't sure where she fit into the group anymore.

"Well, he's not from here so I thought it would be nice for him to know some local people," Cas said, then smiled softly. "Plus you guys are my friends, and your opinion means a lot to me."

"Awww!" Lily said, hugging Cas from the side. Cas laughed and hugged her back. "You seem to be happier with him too, it's nice to see you smiling more." Cas didn't reply to that. She had been happier in the last month or so, but she had thought that was an effect of the vacation from work.

They spent the rest of the walk talking about the differences between San Francisco and NYC, or pointing out the weirdest looking things in the shop windows, or interesting people on the street. They didn't make it back to Cas's apartment until around four. Cas had finished her laundry that morning while Lily slept, but she hadn't wanted to wake the girl up by putting the clothes away, so she did that now while Lily talked about the people she had met in California. By the time seven rolled around, Cas was finally satisfied with the cleanliness of her apartment.

"Well, I'm going to go to the bar for a while, and you should probably meet up with Robin," Cas said, grabbing her purse. "Did you talk to her yet?"

"No… I was just going to wait until she shows up…" Lily said, and Cas nodded.

"I'll see you later then," Cas said. "You still have a key to this place right? You can come back anytime you want."

"Thanks Cas, it means a lot," Lily said, hugging her again.

"No problem," Cas said, smiling. She walked out the door, then the fifty feet to the bar. She glanced in the window by the door before pulling it open, her heart suddenly beating hard in her chest. Her palms began to grow a little clammy, and she wiped them on her jeans, then glanced over herself and pulled the door open. Maybe she should have worn nicer clothes, she had improved her wardrobe a little during her time away. Or maybe she should have told everyone she was already back. Surprising them seemed like a bad idea now. She took a deep breath, then walked around the door frame into the main part of the bar, and over to the table, trying to calm herself down as she went. She knew it wasn't likely that they would all suddenly hate her, but that's all she could think about.

"Hey guys," she said, then felt stupid. Was that really all she could say after six weeks away? She avoided looking at Barney, worried that she would still feel some sort of attraction to him.

"Cas!" Robin said, jumping up from her seat to hug Cas. Cas grinned and hugged her back, then pulled up a chair to sit at the end of the table.

"When did you get back?" Marshall asked, and Cas was glad to see that he was no longer the mopey self he had been when she had left. In fact, he looked like he was completely over Lily.

"Last night," Cas said. "I would have come down then, but I was really tired."

"So how was your class on that thing about whatever?" Barney asked, not sounding like he was paying attention. She glanced over at him for half a second, and inwardly hit herself. She was still drawn to him, a little. And her heart still felt like it was sinking in her chest when she looked at him.

"It was great. London is amazing," she said, smiling.

"We figured you liked it since you didn't come home when you were supposed to," Ted said, smiling as he put his arm around Robin's shoulders. Cas smiled, glad to see they were still together.

"Yeah well, I didn't start doing touristy things until a week before I was supposed to come home. There was a lot to see," she said, smiling.

"You look tan," Robin commented.

"Yeah, well, all the most interesting stuff is outside," she said, then glanced at her watch. Daniel was supposed to meet her there at half past seven, which gave her fifteen minutes or so to warm them up to the idea, though she wasn't sure how to do that. She glanced at the door once, then turned back to the table and smiled.

"Oh my god," Barney said, and she looked at him in confusion. He was staring at her.

"What?" She asked, frowning.

"You have a date!" He said, and her mouth fell open a little.

"What, come on, she just got back, she can't have a date already," Ted said.

"Glancing at the door, checking the time, nervousness," Barney listed, holding up a finger at each point. "Totally on a date. You work fast Reynolds. High five." He held up his hand, and she raised her brows, then high fives him. "Who's the guy?"

"Okay, fine, I met someone," she said, and they leaned toward her. She almost laughed at how much they were all acting like gossiping old ladies. "He was in the class I took in London, and he's doing a semester abroad here at Columbia. His name is Daniel." As she spoke she glanced at Barney a few times, trying to see if he was at all affected by her news. He seemed normal, and she wouldn't let herself think about how that disappointed her a little. She knew that deep down she had been hoping that maybe Daniel would make Barney a little jealous, or something. She should have known better though, Barney didn't get jealous.

"Daniel huh?" Robin said, raising an eyebrow. "And, are you dating this guy?"

"Yeah," Cas aid, smiling. "We've been dating for about a month. He went to law school, Marshall." Marshall nodded and smiled. "He hated it and ended up transferring to a psychology and behavioral science major. Also, I already warned him about how crazy you all are, so he is prepared."

"What?" Ted said, his voice disagreeing. "We aren't crazy."

"You're a little crazy," Cas said, pursing her lips.

"Guys," Ted asked, looking for backup.

"You guys can be a bit intense," Robin said, nodding.

"That's exactly the word I used," Cas said, grinning. Ted huffed and looked away.

"So, when do we get to meet this guy?" Robin asked, ignoring Ted. Cas glanced towards the door, then smiled and stood.

"Right now," she said, waving him over. They drew up another chair so Daniel could sit beside Cas. "Guys, this is Daniel. Daniel this is Robin and Ted, Marshall, and Barney." She gestured to each one as she introduced them, and he nodded to them in turn, holding Cas's hand under the table. She smiled at him when he glanced at her. The longer Daniel was able to converse politely with the group, the more Cas relaxed not her seat. Her heart was still beating a little fast, and she told herself she was nervous that her friends wouldn't like Daniel, even though she knew she was lying. She was nervous because she was seeing Barney after a long time away.

"Well, I need to go, I have to be up early for work tomorrow," Robin said, finishing off her drink.

"It was nice meeting you Robin," Daniel said, shaking her hand again. Cas smiled as Robin returned the sentiment, she wasn't lying, so she must have liked Daniel a little.

"Alright, see you guys later," Robin said, sliding out of the booth.

"I'll walk you out," Ted said, getting up as well. Cas slid into the booth they had vacated and gestured for Daniel to slide in too.

"See ya," Marshall said, then watched them cross the room. They all sat in silence for a moment.

"You just checked out Robin's ass," Barney said, nudging Marshall. Marshall looked back at him and shook his head.

"What? No. I... Barney, I was…" Cas could tell he was lying, he had checked her out, whether he had meant to or not.

"Dude, that's awesome!" Barney said, grinning. "You're finally forgetting about that short redhead."

"Lily," Marshall said, frowning. Cas glanced over at Daniel. She had forgotten to tell him not to mention their lunch, but he didn't look like he was going to say anything, he was actually trying not to laugh at how embarrassed Marshall looked.

"Yes, Lily, thank you. That was gonna drive me crazy all night," Barney said as Ted came back in and took one of the empty chairs. "Hey, Ted! Marshall's just checked out your girlfriend's ass."

"I did not Ted…" Marshall said, turning towards Ted with his hands out in a regretful gesture.

"Awesome! You're finally getting better," Ted said, grinning.

"This is the moment I've been waiting for. Starting tonight, I'm gonna teach you how to live," Barney said, and Cas rolled her eyes. Usually that meant they were going to go around hitting on women. "Ted, you had you're chance. You're out, Marshall's in."

"Yes!" Ted said, making the victory air punch motion.

"Oh, God!" Marshall said, hanging his head.

"Marshall, being a single guy in New York city is like... Pfff... What does everybody like?" Barney asked, looking at them.

"Candy," Marshall supplied.

"Yeah! It's like being in a candy store," Barney said, smiling. "You just walk right in and grab yourself some Whoppers. Yeah," he frowned, then looked at Ted. "Is Whoppers the best one?"

"Mounds," Ted answered.

"Milk Duds," Barney added. Cas glanced at Daniel, who was already looking at her with one eyebrow raised. She shrugged, as though to say this is how they always were. He shook his head, but it wasn't a protesting motion.

"Gobstoppers," Ted said.

"Um…" Barney tried to come up with another one.

"Dubble Bubbles," Daniel added, smiling a little. They were silent for a second, then Barney nodded in approval.

"Nice!" Barney said, and Daniel smiled. "Marshall, we're doing this. I am not taking no for an answer."

"Fine," Marshall said, knowing it would do no good to protest.

"Hey Robin," Ted said, and they all turned to look at him. He had taken out his phone. "Marshall checked out your ass."

"Ted, what is wrong with you?" Marshall asked, trying to take the phone from Ted and failing. A second later he hung up.

"She says thanks," Ted told him, and Barney laughed.

"Well, I need to go, I'm really tired," Cas said, standing. Daniel stood too and walked outside with her.

"Your friends seem…" He trailed off, trying to find the right word.

"Interesting? Crazy?" She supplied.

"I was going to say like they all really get along well with each other. Usually in a group of that size there is always someone who doesn't get along with someone else but they hang out together anyway for the sake of the others," Daniel said, walking with her towards her apartment.

"That happens sometimes, when someone gets in a fight about something. It used to happen before Ted and Robin were dating because he really liked her but she didn't want to go out with him. And right now I guess it's with Lily and Marshall," she added. "I'm glad you didn't mention her, I forgot to warn you."

"Well she seemed like she didn't want anyone else to know she was here when we had lunch," he said, shrugging. They had paused outside her door.

"Are you going to go back to the bar or back to the school?" She asked, looking up at him. He smiled, and she automatically smiled too.

"I think I'll go back to the bar for a while, it's not really too late," he said. She nodded, then stood on her toes to kiss him. He kissed her back for a little while, then let her go and stepped back.

"I'll see you tomorrow," she said, unlocking the front door of her apartment. He waved, then turned back toward the bar as she went inside. Lily wasn't there, she was probably still talking to Robin, so Cas didn't bother being quiet coming in, though she wasn't really loud anyway. She dropped her purse on the table and left her shoes by the door, then grabbed her pajamas from her bed and changed into them, throwing her dirty clothes into the hamper. She was yawning almost nonstop as she turned the lights off and climbed into bed.

* * *

"So Lil," Robin asked. "How have you been?" The three girls were in the middle of the front lobby of an apartment building, waiting for a woman to show them the empty apartment that Lily was thinking about renting.

"This way ladies," the realtor said, gesturing for them to follow.

"I am doing great," Lily said, following the woman who was walking at a quick pace down the hallway. "This summer, best thing ever. San Francisco is so happening right now." Cas walked in front of them, ignoring the conversation. She could tell Lily was lying about San Francisco, but she would wait for her to come around on her own.

"And your art program?" Robin continued, smiling as the woman in front of them stopped and unlocked a door, then gestured them through it.

"Oh, the art program, best thing ever," Lily said, stepping through the door and looking around. "My art instructor told me he couldn't teach me anything, my painting was so good. But the best part of SF - oh that's what we call San Francisco - the people. Even just riding around on the bus all summer, it was like a human tapestry. I met a Buddhist monk slash adventure writer, a woman named Paula who sang in punk band for children, and a neurosurgeon. He said I was stunning," Lily said, with a grin.

"Wow, I am so happy for you," Robin said, looking around the apartment as well. Lily moved off to talk to the realtor woman as Cas wandered off toward the kitchen to look around. After that apartment they looked at two more, both not as good as the first, though the third one seemed okay in Cas's opinion, if a bit small for Lily's tastes.

The next day, Cas and Robin met Lily to look at one more apartment, this time Ted came with as well.

"But I need the freedom to really chase my passion, which was painting but now, I think it's music, or spoken words. Maybe both. God, isn't life amazing," Lily said, leading them around the corner of a hallway. Cas had zoned out, having heard all of Lily's stories already, and had been examining the building they were in. The hallway was disgusting, in her opinion, but she was a little bit of a clean freak, so maybe it was just her.

"Yeah," Ted replied as they came to a stop in front of a worn door.

"It is so great to see you Ted," Lily said, hugging him. She smiled, then looked at the door. "Ah! I'm gonna get the key from the lockbox." She turned and walked back the way they had come, leaving them alone in the hall. Ted grinned and began to chuckle.

"What?" Robin asked, turning to face him.

"She's miserable," he said, smiling. "She's realized she's made a huge mistake. Her and Marshall will be back together in a week, I love it!"

"No, you just want Lily to be miserable," Robin said, arguing. "The truth is she's happy."

"Trust me. I've known Lily for nine years," Ted said.

"Trust me, I'm a girl!" Robin retorted.

"Yeah. But you're Canadian," Ted said, as though that meant she was always wrong. They argued over each other for a few seconds until Ted held out his hands in surrender.

"No, alright. Five bucks says she still wants Marshall," Ted said.

"You're on," Robin said, stepping closer to him to try to be intimidating.

"Five American bucks," Ted said, and Cas snorted.

"Dammit! OK, so how do we get the truth out of her?" Robin said, glancing down the hall to look for Lily.

"Tequila. It's her weakness," Ted said. "Three shots, she tells you the truth about anything." Cas snorted again. "You want in on the bet Cas?"

"No way. Ted is right, Robin is wrong, I'm not betting, it would be like taking your money," Cas said, smiling innocently.

"I hope this is my new home," Lily said, rounding the corner just in time to halt any arguing. She unlocked the door and they all glanced inside. The place was a tiny one room apartment, about the size of a normal bathroom, and it was disgusting. Lily closed the door. "Yeah, I'm gonna take that first apartment."

The four of them split ways on the street, Cas heading to the restaurant she was supposed to meet Daniel at for lunch, Robin and Lily back to her place, and Ted to the store to purchase Tequila.

Cas spent the car ride trying to fix her hair. It was a little humid outside, which meant that her hair, which she had left down for once, was very frizzy, and refused to lie flat. She finally gave up trying to get it to behave and settled for braiding it over one shoulder and tying it off with a little rubber band she found in her purse.

She paid the cabbie and got out, straightening her clothes as she walked to the restaurant door. It was a nicer place than she usually went to, and she was wearing nicer clothes than she usually did, mostly because she was still trying to make sure that Daniel had a good impression of her. She wanted to make sure he knew that she was able to conduct herself in any given situation. She glanced into the reflective surface of the window, making sure she looked okay, then entered the restaurant. The reservation had been made under Harrison, Daniel's last name, and she had, for once, beaten him to the place they were meeting at. The hostess led her to the table, which was half hidden by a divider wall, and she sat, choosing the seat that faced to door so she would be able to see him come in. This seat put her back to most of the other tables, only giving about four other tables a view of the side of her face. At one of these tables, sat a certain blond man, and his 'date', one of which was staring at her in surprise, though she didn't see them.

"Prince Charles?" The dark haired woman asked, bringing Barney's attention back to her.

"Please," he said, faking a very posh British accent. "Don't use my title here, it wouldn't do for anyone to overhear." The woman smiled in apology and went back to telling him about her family possible having an ancestor who was a duke of something or other. He wasn't paying attention, which was usual around this point in the fake date, but this time he wasn't spending the conversation imagining all the things he wanted to do with his date later in bed, no, this time he was thinking about how he had definitely just thought to himself how beautiful Cas had been walking through the front door. Not hot, beautiful. He frowned a little, replaying the image in his mind. The sun had lit up her hair, making it almost glow, and her eyes had crinkled at the corners as she smiled at the hostess. The light blue skirt she was wearing clung to her legs while she walked to her table, and now, staring at the door, her blue eyes seemed to be a brighter color than the sky, and the light coming from the window behind her cast a halo of light around her head. She really was… beautiful.

"Prince… I mean, um, Charles? Did you hear me?" He looked back to his date, leaning forward on his elbows.

"I'm awfully sorry," he said, his accent sounding ridiculous to his own ears. The woman smiled though, and he almost rolled his eyes at how easy this play had been. "I was up all night working on an agreement with the president about… well, I'm really not permitted to speak about it."

"Oh my, that sounds important," the woman said, fluttering her eyelashes as she spoke. Barney was distracted again as Cas stood and her face lit up in a smile. He looked towards the door where she was looking and frowned, spotting her new boyfriend. The guy had seemed normal enough at the bar, nothing special, or even interesting. Just a normal guy. So why did Cas's face brighten when she saw him? He walked over to Cas, kissed her cheek, and pulled her chair back out for her to sit in before he slid into the one next to her. Cas turned her body in her chair to face him better, also letting Barney see her face better. She laughed, covering her mouth with a hand as she always did, and rested her hand on his arm.

"You know, I always thought you had dark hair. In all the pictures I've seen anyway," Barney's date was saying.

"Hmm? Yeah," He said, still watching the other table as a waitress took their order and walked away. A hostess led a couple to the table between Barney and Cas, and he slid his chair back a little to keep them in view. Cas said something, smiled, and leaned toward Daniel.

"Look, is something wrong? I thought we were having a good time but if you're busy I can just go," the woman across the table from him snapped. He couldn't remember what her name was now, Rachel? Rebecca? Maybe Rayna? He glanced at her, then looked back at the other table as Cas's laughter echoed through the room, just barely reaching him over the chatter and clink of cutlery on plates. His date huffed, then pushed back her chair, grabbed her purse, and stormed off. He didn't even look her way as she left, trying to figure out what Cas and her new boyfriend could possible be talking about that was so interesting they both had to lean in to each other like that.

"Sir, will you be wanting your check?" A waiter asked from beside Barney.

"Yeah, sure," he said, and the man pulled a black book from his pocket. Barney gave him his card without looking at the bill, and the man was off again. Barney watched as the waitress returned to Cas's table with their food, then left again. His eyes traced over her face, her hair, her arms, followed her hands as she took a bite of food, then they wandered down her legs, before finally ending up on her face again. His waiter returned with his card, but Barney didn't get up to leave right away, instead watching the two until they were nearly done with their meal.

"Excuse me sir, I don't mean to be rude, but we really need this table for the next customers," the waiter said, finally returning to his table. Normally, Barney would have made some sort of big deal about needing to keep the table, but he just stood in silence and walked toward the door. He took one last glance at Cas, then walked through the doors and out onto the street, turning right so he wouldn't walk in front of the restaurant's windows and be seen.

Cas glanced up at the door once near the end of her fantastic lunch date. She had seen a flash of blond and had thought she recognized the face underneath, but when she looked up there were no familiar faces in view. She didn't give it a second thought as she returned her attention to her meal and the story Daniel was telling.

After their meal, Cas and Daniel went to see a movie, then Daniel went back to his on campus housing, promising to see her the next day. Cas went to Robin's apartment, where she and Ted were probably halfway through attempting to get Lily dunk enough to spill her guts to them. Her knock on the door was answered after a few moments, by Robin, who, from the smell of her breath had consumed quite a bit of alcohol. Cas smiled at her, then shut the door behind her as Robin half walked, half shuffled, back to her couch to sit next to Ted.

"Oh hey Cas!" Lily said, then turned back to Ted. "Anyway, then I discovered this area, North beach. Best beach ever! Oh, I've been blabbering on about my summer. How are you guys doing? And hey, how is Marshall?"

"Terrific," Ted said.

"That is so good to hear," Lily said, smiling. Her phone rang in her purse and she fished it out, glanced at it, then looked up. "Oh, hold on. This could be about he apartment." She walked into Robin's guest room to answer the phone. Cas hoped that if it was about the apartment, Lily could manage to keep from slurring her words as badly as she had a moment ago.

"Okay, we're way past truth-telling Lily and about to hit Cinco-de-Mayo-1998 Lily, and I'm not cleaning that up again," Ted said, frowning in the direction Lily had gone. "So, congratulations. You win, she's happy." Ted pulled out a five dollar bill and moved to hand it to Robin when Lily came back into the room, her face almost shocked, and sat between them in silence. Cas had cleared away the half empty bottle of Tequila and the empty shot glasses, putting them in Robin's kitchen.

"I didn't get it. That first apartment," Lily said slowly. "I... I waited too long and somebody else got it." Cas walked back into the room with three cups of water, setting them down on the coffee table in place of the alcohol as Lily started to cry.

"Interesting," Ted said, putting his five dollars back into his pocket and leaning forward. Cas shook her head. "Wow Lily, you, uh, seem to be having a pretty strong reaction to losing this apartment. I wonder is it because it reminds you of something you lost because you couldn't commit?" Lily let out a loud, over exaggerated sob.

"No, Lily you're crying over the crown molding and the real hardwood floor," Robin said, patting Lily's shoulder. Cas briefly wondered if wither of these two had ever actually tried to comfort an upset person before. "There's no deeper meaning, right Lily? Just quit crying and tell him."

"The apartment is a metaphor for Marshall!" Lily cried, and Robin made an upset face and pulled out five dollars, handing it over to Ted who looked really pleased with himself.

"Here, Ted, why don't you go drink this," Cas said, handing him a glass of water.

"More beer! Yeah!" He said, tipping the glass back. He stood and stumbled off towards the bathroom. Cas took his vacated seat, giving another glass of water to Robin.

"Robin, go change," Cas said, pointing to Robin's bedroom.

"Yes ma'am," Robin said, giving her a really bad salute and standing. Cas wrapped an arm around Lily's shoulder.

"Lily, it's alright. I know you miss Marshall, but I promise he still loves you," Cas said, pressing the last glass of water into Lily's hands. She sipped it, hiccuped, and looked up at Cas.

"He does?" She asked, her voice small. "How do you know?"

"I just do," Cas said. "Now finish that and you can go to sleep."

"Okay," Lily said, drinking the water. She leaned back onto the couch and Cas barely managed to grab the half empty glass from her hands before it fell. She sighed, then stooped and put an arm around Lily's shoulder's, helping her to her feet. The two of them stumbled toward the guest room and Cas tucked her into bed, then turned out the lights. Ted was standing in the hallway, not wearing pants, staring at the wall. Cas pushed his shoulder, making him stumble toward Robin's room, and continued pushing him until he was all the way inside the room and then she pulled the door shut and settled in to the couch to sleep, and to make sure none of the drunk idiots managed to wander outside during the night and do anything stupid.

The next morning Cas was woken by someone throwing up in the bathroom, she drank the rest of the water in Lily's cup on the table, then went to see if whoever it was needed any help. By the time she got there, Lily was done throwing up and was rinsing out her mouth.

"You all right?" Cas asked from the doorway.

"Shhhh," Lily moaned, clapping a hand to her head. The girl stumbled back into her room and closed the door. Cas sighed, then sat on the couch for the rest of them to wake up. She watched one news program and half of a weather watchers special before they were all up. Robin was the peppiest, still drunk from last night. They decided to go down to the diner next door to eat, so Cas went with them.

"Morning guys, what can I get you?" The waiter asked, approaching their table.

"Shhh! Bring me the dirtiest, greasiest tuna melt you got," Lily said, keeping her eyes closed as she spoke. "And a milkshake."

"For you, sir?" The waiter asked, turning to Ted.

"Gravy," Ted said, rubbing his forehead. The waiter gave him an odd look.

"You want that gravy on something?" He asked, picking up the unused menus.

"Surprise me," Ted said, handing his menu back.

"I'd take you with gravy if my boyfriend wasn't sitting right here!" Robin said, laughing. "Just kidding. I'm good."

"I'll just have a bagel please," Cas said,giving the man an apologetic look.

"What are you chirpy about?" Lily asked, Glaring across the table at Robin.

"She's still drunk from last night," Ted said quietly.

"I don't think so!" Robin said happily. "Whoo!"

"Look, if you want Marshall back so bad, how come it took you two days to ask about him?" Ted asked, ignoring Robin.

"I was dying to ask. I was just trying to play it cool. But really I couldn't get Marshall out of my head. I was just waiting for one of you to say something about him so I wouldn't have to ask, but you didn't." She looked down at her lap. "It was such an awful summer! I just wanted to get back here and see him."

"But I thought your summer was great?!" Ted said, remembering their earlier conversations.

"Not exactly… my art teacher kicked me out of class because he didn't like my art… he called it needless." The food arrived and they all started eating in silence.

"So all those interesting people you met on the bus…?" Ted began.

"Yeah, um… it was actually just one guy, and he was crazy," Lily said, frowning. "I never got in touch because I was too embarrassed. I screwed everything up. I have no job, no place to live. I lost the love of my life. Look, I know I have no right to ask this but do you think Marshall would take me back?"

"In a heartbeat," Ted said, nodding. "If you called him up, yeah, he'd take you back with open arms."

"Wow. So, maybe I should call him?" Lily asked, looking up hopefully.

"Maybe," Ted nodded, took a bite of food, then threw his fork down. "No! This is... Ooww…" He grabbed his head, then began in a much quieter voice. "Hold on. Look. If you're gonna go back to him, I don't wanna hear the word "maybe". "Maybe" cannot be in your vocabulary. This break-up almost killed him. And he cannot go through it again. So, unless you're absolutely certain, stay the hell away from him." Cas hid her smile behind a hand as she ate. Ted was right, Lily couldn't just keep running back to Marshall then leaving whenever she wanted to, but she thought he was wrong about Marshall taking her back in a heartbeat. Yes, Marshall loved her, but he wasn't some lovesick puppy that was just waiting for her to come back to him. He was stronger than that.

"This guy likes pennies!" Robin said, laughing as she pointed at Ted. Ted rolled his eyes.

They finished their meal in silence, Lily thinking, and Ted too hungover to keep talking. As the day wore on, Robin started to sober up a little, and by the time they got back to her apartment, all she wanted to do was sleep. Ted left to go home a little while later, and Cas split a cab with him so she could get home too.

She took a shower and changed, then called Daniel to set up their dinner plans that night. Both of them wanted a more casual place than the restaurant from yesterday, and they eventually decided just to go to the bar. Cas busied herself by finally sorting through her files from the last school year and taking out all the students she knew wouldn't be returning to her. The files that were left she split into two piles, one she knew for sure were coming back, and ones that might come back. The ones that might come back had priority over new students, but they only had three weeks to tell her they were coming back before she would take on new patients to fill the open time.

Finally, as eight o'clock approached, Cas realized how hungry she was. She had only eaten a bagel that day, and that was a long time ago. She slipped on her shoes and went to the bar, choosing a booth that was on the other side of the room from her friends. Daniel came in only half a minute later and they ordered their food, deciding to eat by themselves before going over to join the group that was already in their usual place.

Cas could feel someones eyes on her throughout the meal, but every time she looked towards the groups normal booth, they were all engaged in conversations. She sighed and turned back to Daniel, listening to his story about primary school in England. She laughed at the right parts, and was soon fully interested in what he was saying, and she forgot about the feeling of being watched, so she didn't notice when Barney glanced toward her again. Marshall, however, did.

"Hey Barney, help me get the next round," Marshall said, practically pushing him out of the seat to get up. Barney made a little show about being inconvenienced, but followed him anyway. As they waited for the drinks, they turned their back on the bar, and Marshall noticed Barney's eyes immediately finding Cas, then looking around the whole room, and finally settling back on Cas.

"So, what's the deal with you and Cas?" Marshall asked as Barney followed the motion of her hand as she brushed a strand of hair behind her ear.

"What?" "He asked, not having paid attention.

"The deal? With you and Cas?" Marshall repeated, waving his hand in front of Barney's face to get his attention.

"What?" Barney asked again, this time in an 'are you insane' way. "No. What? No deal," Barney said, making a face. Marshall nodded as though he agreed, then glanced over Barney's shoulder.

"Oh, Hey Cas," he said, raising a hand in greeting. Barney automatically raised a hand to straighten his hair as he half turned in excitement, only to see that no one stood behind him. He turned back and hit Marshall's arm. "Nothing going on? Uh huh."

"Okay, fine, but you can't tell anyone," Barney said, leaning in a little as they both turned back to face the bar. Barney glanced around them, then sighed. "I might… I may have…" he mumbled something under his breath.

"Sorry, didn't catch that," Marshall said, grinning. He knew where this was going.

"I said… I might have some… feelings," he practically spit out the word. "For, uh, Cas."

"I knew it!" Marshall said loudly, and Barney smacked his arm again and looked around them.

"You can't tell anyone," Barney said. "If you even so much as whisper anything about it, I'll tell everyone about the things I have on you."

"You have nothing on me," Marshall said, grinning.

"Calzone," Barney said, giving him a knowing look.

"Okay fine," Marshall said quickly, holding his hands up. "I wasn't going to tell anyone anyway."

"Good," Barney said, grabbing two of the drinks that Carl the bartender set on the counter and heading back towards the table. Marshall followed with the other two drinks, grinning.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen

Cas was drawn into consciousness by her phone beeping. She groaned and reached out, keeping her eyes closed, and groped on the bedside table until she came into contact with the phone. She pulled in front of her face and squinted at it, then frowned and sat up. She had been planning on breakfast with Daniel that morning to celebrate the first week of classes, but according to his text he wouldn't be able to make it. She texted him back telling him it was fine and that she wished him luck in whatever was keeping him busy, then she pulled the duvet over her head and tried to go back to sleep.

After a half hour of tossing and turning, she gave up and got out of bed, heading first for the shower, then to her dresser. Now that her whole day was free, she hunted for something to do. It was far too early to think anyone would be at the bar, or even awake, so she settled for catching up on her laundry and chores for the week.

She was distracted by her phone beeping again. She stared at it for a moment. Usually she got maybe one or two texts a day, at the most. Maybe Daniel could make breakfast after all, though now it would be more like a brunch. She grinned and picked up her phone, then frowned when she saw the text was from Barney instead, telling her the whole group plus Ted's parents were going out for dinner at some fancy place she had never heard of. She considered saying she was busy, fingering her phone as she thought. After missing her breakfast date she wasn't really in the happy mood it would take to be energetic around the group. Then she frowned and considered inviting Daniel, going so far as to type out the text before she deleted it. If he was too busy to make breakfast, she would be too busy to see him for dinner. She knew it was childish, but she had been looking forward to breakfast, she had barely seen him all week, him being busy settling in and her being busy getting back to work. She texted Barney that she would be there, then picked out her clothes. The place wasn't overly fancy, but she wanted to give a good impression, so she laid out her only skirt, a light blue one she had worn on her first official date with Daniel, and added a white blouse to it. She still had almost four hours before she had to meet them at the restaurant, but she had nothing else to do so Cas began working on her hair, straightening it for the first time in months, then she moved on to makeup, though by that point she was bored of primping so she wore hardly any.

Cas sighed, wondering what to do with the almost two hours of spare time she had, and settled for mindlessly staring at the tv while it played a documentary on some wildlife she didn't pay attention to. Her tv had been on this station for months, left over from when Barney used to come over and watch it. She usually didn't watch tv, so she hadn't noticed until that moment that she had never changed it. She was happy when the little pang of hurt that usually went through her when she thought about Barney was less painful than normal. Having someone else she could focus her attention on was certainly helping, not that that was the only reason she had chosen to go out with Daniel. He was smart, charming, funny… and now that she thought of it, she didn't really know that much about him. Not his past anyway. He had mentioned having a sibling, or maybe more than one, and that his parents lived in a small town near Paris, but that was about it. She frowned, then shrugged it off. To be fair, she didn't talk about her past very often either.

Finally she couldn't take the boredom anymore and left the apartment to find a cab. Showing up early and having to sit alone for a while was much better than sitting around here doing nothing, though she was sure that if she really wanted to she could go over to Ted and Marshall's, or even call Lily and go to her new tiny gross apartment. She didn't have the energy to deal with all the drama the group usually had though, so she got into a cab alone, giving the address of the restaurant and sitting in silence.

As it turned out, she wasn't the first one there, Barney was.

"Barney?" She asked, sitting down next to him at the long table. His eyes flicked up, then down over her in a way that made her want to blush.

"Nice skirt," he said, as though he had some private joke. She raised an eyebrow and slid her chair forward as a waitress brought her a glass of water. Cas thanked her, then turned to look at Barney, who was on his phone looking at something.

"Why are you here so early?" She asked, and he shrugged without looking up.

"I'm trying to make Ted's parent's like me more than they like Robin," he said.

"Why?" She asked, frowning. "Aren't they supposed to like Robin more, since she's Ted's girlfriend and all?"

"No," he said angrily. "I'm more important." She smiled, amused at his childlike behavior. He frowned and looked up at her. "Why are you here early?"

"I was bored," she said, shrugging.

"Where's your boyfriend?" He asked in an almost snide voice. She rolled her eyes, then frowned. Come to think of it, she hadn't heard back from him this morning about what was keeping him so busy.

"Busy," she said distractedly as she pulled her phone out of her purse, glanced at it noticing the empty screen with no new messages, then snapped it closed and put it back. She looked up to see Barney watching her.

"He's cheating on you," he said, and she scowled at him.

"No he's not," she said.

"Of course he is. He's been dating you for a few months. It's statistically proven that 83% of men cheat after two months," he said, and she shook her head, frowning.

"You just made that up," she said. He shrugged. They were distracted by the arrival of Ted, Robin, Marshall, and Ted's parents. Cas greeted them when she was introduced, smiling politely, then settled in to listen to the conversation. She didn't speak as Lily arrived besides the initial hello, or as they all ate their food. She didn't even have to try to stop herself from laughing as Barney laid on the charm for Ted's parents, she was too busy fretting over what Barney had said.

She didn't think Daniel was cheating on her, just because he had missed one date. And one on Tuesday. That didn't mean anything. But there was a little nagging voice in the back of her mind telling her she wasn't good enough for him, or anyone, and that she didn't know how to be a girlfriend since she had never dated, and that he must have been tired of her, that's why he was canceling. Most of her food went uneaten as she had lost her appetite, and she didn't notice the little fight happening between Marshall and Lily, even though they were sitting next to her. She did notice when Barney got up to play the piano. She hadn't known he could play, she would have guessed that sitting still long enough to learn would be too boring for him. No one bothered to speak to her, maybe they noticed how quiet she was being, but more likely they were absorbed in their own conversations. She was drawn out of her thoughts as the waitress cleared the table and Barney said her name in conversation. She didn't hear what he had said.

"Isn't that right Cas?" She heard, and looked up to see most of the table looking at her. She nodded, not sure what she was agreeing to, and they turned back to their conversations. As Ted's parents got up to leave, she leaned over to Barney.

"What was I agreeing to? I wasn't paying attention," she said. He grinned.

"I know, you were in your own little world," he said, tapping her forehead. She frowned at him. "I just spent the whole meal telling Ted's parents that we regularly attend mass." She frowned.

"Why?" She asked.

"To prove I'm better then Robin of course," he said, shaking his head.

"Yes I'm sure that asking Ted's parents permission to date him is very important to you," Cas said, rolling her eyes. She was exhausted, though she hadn't really done much that day. Barney ignored her.

"I'll pick you up at eight tomorrow," he said, standing.

"Uh, for what?" She asked, lost again.

"Mass at Saint Peter's of course," he said, half laughing.

"I don't want to go to mass Barney," she said, frowning.

"Please?" He said, his face blank. "It'll be fun." She snorted.

"Why Saint Peters?" She asked.

"It's the biggest church nearby," he said.

"I know, I've been there before," she said. "I meant why are you going through all this effort?"

"You've been to church before?" He asked in surprise, ignoring her question.

"Of course I have," she said. "I was raised Catholic until my parents stopped going when I was a junior. I went to Saint Peters a few times when I first moved here. I didn't like it, it's too stuffy."

"I can just tell her you're sick tomorrow then," he said, shrugging.

"No, I'll go," she said, then hit herself internally. She had only said that out of the reflex to argue with Barney. "It'll be interesting," she added.

"Great," he said, smiling again, and she smiled back, also out of reflex. "And then everyone is going to brunch."

"Fine," she said, not in the mood to argue anymore. She stood, following the rest of the group out to the street where they all prepared to leave, and rode back to her apartment in a cab with Barney and Marshall while Ted rode in a separate cab with his parents. She didn't talk the whole ride, or when they got out, just waved and went back to her apartment, checking her phone as she went. Still nothing new. She sank into bed, feeling more depressed than she had in months.

* * *

Cas woke up angry the next morning, having slept fitfully, tossing and turning until the sun was almost rising. She didn't feel exhausted as she found a church appropriate outfit to wear, then showered and dressed. After the initial look at her phone when she first got up, she turned it on silent and put it into her purse, then she went outside to wait for Barney. She should have just told him she didn't want to go to mass and help him show off to Ted's mom, but there was just a comforting routine about church, one that she could use right now. She broke down in the cab and pulled her phone out, ignoring Barney's talking.

Her finger hovered over the button that would open up a new message, then she sighed and pushed it, then typed out that she hoped Daniel had had a good day yesterday and that she had missed him at breakfast. He replied only moments later, which surprised her since it was so early. He apologized, saying that he had been in a required meeting for the transfer students and then his phone had died and he had fallen asleep before he remembered to text her. She smiled, relaxing. How could she have though Barney might be right? Of course he wasn't cheating on her.

She put her phone back into her purse as the cab pulled up to the church and Barney got out, immediately spotting Ted's mother. The three of them went inside, Cas immediately calming at the familiar atmosphere that seemed to encompass all churches. She was surprised that Barney knew the proper way to conduct himself in a church, but she didn't comment. In fact, besides the initial greetings, she didn't speak to either of them, content to listen to their conversation on the way to the restaurant after mass.

She settled in the chair between Ted's father and Lily, and tried to pick up the conversation, but everyone seemed to be arguing with someone else about something, so she eventually settled for pulling out her phone again and texting Daniel. They talked throughout the meal, Cas only looking up once so a waitress could take a group picture, and she was happily ignoring everyone else when suddenly there was a loud crash and she looked up to see that a waitress had fallen, or dropped her tray. Somehow, that led to the revelation that Ted's parents were divorced, and the whole table was tense as Ted had a little mini freak out. He left, followed by his parents, then Robin. Cas glanced at the others, Barney, as usual, was trying to make a joke to lighten the mood, but he left to the omelet bar after seeing the tension between Marshall and Lily, and Cas was quick to follow though she didn't want an omelet.

"So did you break up with your boyfriend yet?" Barney asked as the stood near the omelet station. She glanced back at Marshall and Lily, almost thinking that whatever they were arguing about would be better than this, but sighed and turned back.

"No, why would I?" She asked.

"He's cheating on you," Barney said matter-of-factly.

"No he's not," she said, rolling her eyes. "Not everyone has commitment issues you know." She regretted the words as soon as she said them, but he just shrugged it off and grinned.

"Whatever. Just don't come running to me when you find out I'm right," he said, then smirked. "Or do, I'm open to rebound sex."

"I think you're open to any kind of sex," she said, trying to act disgusted, but her lips were twitching up in an amused smile. He laughed.

"Pretty much," he said. She shook her head and went back to sit at the table, figuring that Lily and Marshall had had enough time to talk by now.

"Cas, want to go shopping with me after brunch?" Lily asked as Cas settled back into her seat. After having eaten hardly any of her dinner the night before, Cas had finished almost all of the food on her plate.

"Sure," Cas said, smiling. It had been a long time since she'd had any Lily gossip time, and she could tell that's what Lily wanted, since she only asked Cas to go shopping when there was something she really wanted to talk about. They all bid farewell to Ted's parents when they finally came back inside, and Lily and Cas found a cab and went to a popular shopping area.

"So what's up?" Cas asked, glancing over at Lily. The mall was a lot less crowded than usual, since it was a Sunday, and they were able to easily make their way from shop to shop though Cas didn't buy anything at any of them.

"What do you mean?" Lily asked, frowning.

"Lily, you asked me to go shopping with you, which is code for either 'I have a really big piece of gossip' or 'Something's bothering me' and if it was gossip you would have spilled it already. Plus, you've bought a pair of shoes and three tops already, something's bothering you," Cas said. Lily sighed, then led them over to a coffee shop.

"Okay fine. Sometimes I forget you're a psychologist," Lily said as they stood in line.

"Being a psychologist has nothing to do with it. I just know you," Cas said, laughing. Lily shook her head.

"I guess," she said, then stood silently in line for a while, slowly moving closer to the counter. "It's Marshall." Lily finally said as they settled in to a small table with their coffees.

"What about him?" Cas asked patiently, adopting her therapist voice.

"I just don't know what to do! I want him back. I wish I'd never went to San Francisco," she cried. It sounded like she had been holding a lot of things back for a while, and now she was spilling them all out. "I love Marshall, I really do, I never stopped loving him, but he won't give me another chance. I don't know what to do."

"Tell him that," Cas said, sipping her coffee.

"I did," Lily said, looking near tears. "He says we need some time apart."

"Lily, he was really devastated when you left, he moped around for weeks hardly talking to anyone. He was hurt you left, and it takes a while to get over that kind of hurt," her voice was soft and comforting, though she really had no personal experience in the area of being in love. "He is probably afraid of getting hurt like that again. He's going to need time to learn to trust you again, and it will probably take a while. But saying you two need some time apart isn't saying he will never consider being with you again, it's just asking for a break. You have to prove to him that he can trust you and that you won't leave again and hurt him." Lily was nodding slowly as Cas spoke.

"How do I do that?" She asked, her voice soft.

"I don't know," Cas said, shrugging and leaning back in her chair. "You know him the best. You are the one who broke the relationship, so you are going to have to be the one to fix it. Just let him know that you aren't going anywhere." Lily gave her a tiny smile.

"You're right," she said, leaning back in her chair as well. "I'll just give him some time."

"And talk to him. Communication is important in relationships," Cas added, smiling now too.

"Don't go all therapist-y on me now," Lily said, chuckling.

"Have you ever been to see a therapist Lily?" Cas asked, grinning. "That was pretty much the same as any of my meetings with the students."

"I didn't even notice you were doing it," Lily said, thinking back over the conversation. "I guess I just assumed therapists always ask 'and how does that make you feel' and nothing else." Cas laughed with her, then shook her head.

"Only in the movies," she said. "Most of the time people come to therapists because they need advice or because they are lonely. It's just like talking to a friend. I have to build up trust with each patient and become their friend, to an extent."

"To an extent?" Lily asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"Well, if I get impatient with you I can just tell you to stop whining," Cas said, grinning. "If I said that to a student I would probably get fired."

Lily laughed, then stood, and Cas followed her back out onto the street for some more shopping. Lily was perceptible happier after their talk, and Cas was very glad for it.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen

"Cas! Cas! Cas!" Cas groaned and rolled over in her bed, pulling her blanket up around her ears to block out the noise. It didn't work. "Caaaaaaaaaaaaas! Time to wake up."

"Lily," Cas groaned, removing the blanked to glare up at the annoying red head. "I'm revoking your key rights."

"Yeah like that would keep me out," Lily said, rolling her eyes.

"What do you want?" Cas asked, rolling out of bed. She regretted removing her blanket a moment later when the cold air hit her. It wasn't quite winter out, but her apartment got quite cold during the night. At least most of the place was carpeted so the floors weren't that bad.

"Don't you ever sleep in actual pajamas?" Lily asked, backing away from the bed now that Cas was up. She glanced down at herself and raised a brow. She was wearing shorts and a sports bra. Not an unusual sleeping outfit.

"You probably sleep naked so you can't talk," Cas said, rooting through her dresser for something to wear. She settled on a plain black t-shirt, pulling it on without bothering to change into a regular bra.

"Not since Marshal," Lily said, then sighed. "Anyway, lets talk about something else. How's Daniel?"

"Great," Cas said, smiling as she looked for the jeans she had worn for part of the afternoon yesterday. They weren't dirty so she wanted to get another wear out of them before washing. "We are going out to dinner tonight."

"Good, good," Lily said offhandedly.

"Did you wake me up to gossip?" Cas asked, changing into her pants behind the screen that divided her bed from the rest of the apartment.

"Not exactly," Lily said, shrugging as Cas went into the bathroom to brush her hair. "I'm bored though."

"Get a job," Cas said, shrugging as she twisted her hair back into a ponytail and began to put on a bit of makeup. Whenever Lily needed something to do it usually involved going out in public.

"I'm trying," Lily said, then sighed. "There aren't any openings at any schools in the area." Cas sighed, feeling a little bad for her comments.

"Sorry, I know you are trying," she said, dusting a light layer of eye shadow onto her face. "What did you want to do today?"

"Let's get our nails done," Lily said, pepping back up into her usual energetic self. "I know this great place near here."

"Okay," Cas said. She had only ever gotten her nails done once before, for her first real job interview right out of college. It seemed like a bit of a waste of money to her, but she knew Lily would just suggest shopping as an alternative so nails were the lesser evil.

"Great," Lily said. "I'll invite Robin too."

Lily's nail place was only a few blocks away so they walked. It wasn't as early as Cas had assumed, being woken up. It was a Saturday so she had slept in a bit late, almost till ten.

Lily talked a bit about a job at an art exhibit she wanted to apply for, and Cas nodded along, relaxing into her chair as the manicurist filed her nails into a better shape. Her nails had just barely finished being painted a pale blue color when Robin arrived.

"We had our first fight," she said, doing without an actual greeting. She huffed a little as she set her things down by the chair next to Cas's.

"Oh no!" Lily said, keeping her hands on the arms of her chair to dry as she twisted to look at Robin. "What'd you fight about?"

"Well, a few months ago, his architecture firm was approached to design some new building…" Robin said, trying to sit still as another manicurist came over and started prepping her nails. "It's this big skyscraper in Spokane. It'd be a huge project for his firm and if they don't get it, they could go under." She frowned. "So anyway, the head architect unveils his new design to the whole company and apparently, Ted thinks it looks like a giant penis. He's been complaining about it for weeks now."

Cas did her best not to chuckle.

"So you and Ted had your first fight," Lily said, shrugging nonchalantly. "It obviously ended well. I mean, you're here with us."

"Actually, it didn't end," she said, shrugging. "At all. I started getting bummed out, so I came here. It's what I do. When my grandma died, I got a perm."

"Ooh, two tragedies in one day," Cas said, smiling a little.

"The thing is, Ted has been literally complaining about work nonstop for weeks," She repeated, growing frustrated again. "So, when I came over today, I was kind of done."

"What happened?" Lily said, and Cas was glad she had fond something else to entertain her besides Cas's relationship. The truth was, it hadn't been going so well with Daniel. Since the brunch with Ted's parents a month ago, he had canceled almost half their dates, it would sometimes take him hours to return her calls or texts, and he had begun to be evasive about what he was doing, not that she pried much anyway. And their date tonight was supposed to be important. He had said that he wanted to talk to her about something. Deep down in the back of her mind she knew that he was probably going to end things, but she didn't want to say anything to Lily or Robin. If she did, it would most likely get back to Barney, who would then proceed to shove it in her face that he had been right.

"Robin!" Lily said indignantly from Cas's other side, drawing her back into the present. She hadn't heard any of Robin's explanation.

"What?" Robin asked innocently, her eyes wide. "I knew exactly what he was going to say. I was just helping him get there faster."

"You should work at a suicide hotline," Cas muttered, and they both snorted.

"And then it got ugly," Robin said, continuing her story. I said, 'what I don't do is tell you the same story over and over again. I mean, you wouldn't watch the same movie over and over again, would you? Maybe a great movie like Die Hard. But Field of Dreams? Once is more than enough.' So, now he's all mad at me about the stupid movie."

"Robin, he's upset because you wouldn't listen to him, not because you didn't like some movie," Cas said, frowning. " Listening is the foundation of a relationship."

"And if he's really droning on, you can always practice saying the alphabet backwards," Lily chimed in, grinning. "You know, in case you get pulled over for a DUI."

"I guess I don't know how to do that," Robin said, thinking.

"Yeah, it's really hard, even when you're sober," Lily said, nodding. "That's what I tried to explain to the cop."

"You know they don't actually expect you to know the alphabet backwards," Cas said, chuckling. "They just make you do that so they can see if you slur your words while thinking."

"No, I mean, I guess I don't know how to do this girlfriend thing," Robin said, getting back on topic. "I've never been in a relationship this serious before. I should probably go tell him I'm sorry, shouldn't I?" She asked, looking between Cas and Lily. Cas nodded. "You're trying to do it right now, aren't you?" Robin said when Lily didn't comment.

"What the hell comes before 'Q'?" She asked, frowning in thought. They laughed, then changed the topic to one of Robin's most recent stories about a guy getting stuck in a revolving glass door until the fire department came to get him out.

They spent most of the rest of the day shopping, which resulted in Cas being forced to change into dressier clothes when Lily remembered that she had a date that night. She shouldn't have bothered though, because Daniel called an hour before they had agreed to meet up for dinner to cancel. Apparently he had some big test on Monday and he really had to spend all weekend studying.

She had just left Lily and Robin a few minutes ago, they had been heading to the bar while she went home to get ready for her date, so she dropped off her shopping and hurried to catch up. She didn't want to sit around alone all night overthinking.

Cas caught up to them just as they were coming up the steps from the bar.

"Hey, my date was cancelled, aren't you guys staying for drinks?" Cas asked, tucking her hands into the pickets of her jacket.

"We're going to Marshall's party to find Ted," Lily explained, frowning. "Apparently he took some girl to it earlier."

"That doesn't sound like Ted," Cas said, frowning as she followed them to a busier street to catch a cab.

"Well a bunch of people saw him," Robin said, her voice calm though her hands were fidgeting with her purse.

They arrived at the party twenty minutes later, only to be directed to a club.

"Okay, I really don't know what's going on here but this is seriously out of character for Ted," Lily said as they walked from the subway they had used to get across town to the aforementioned club.

"I agree," Cas said, nodding.

"He must have been really upset by the fight," Robin commented, frowning.

"I think something else is going on here," Cas said, shaking her head. "In the past Ted has retaliated to things like that by making a drastic gesture, like that phone booth when Lily moved in, right?" They nodded. "Well it doesn't make sense that he would deviate from his already set patterns by going to a place that makes him feel uncomfortable. Especially since his fight was with Robin."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Robin asked, getting a little upset.

"I mean that he spent months going after you," Cas explained. "He's been in love with you since he met you, he's not likely to jeopardize your relationship just because you had a little argument. He's more likely to avoid you for a couple days then call you apologizing and begging for you not to leave him."

"That does seem like something he would do," Lily said, nodding. "You're very observant huh?"

"A little," Cas said, grinning. "But I'm not going to tell you all the things I've observed about you all, you'd just get mad."

"That makes me feel like you know all of our secrets," Lily said, shuddering.

"Not all of them," Cas said as they walked along the line to the club queue. "Just most of them."

"Uh huh," Lily said, laughing, as Robin approached the bouncer.

"Excuse me," she said, getting the man's attention. "I'm looking for a couple guys who came in here earlier. One's about six-four, 210, sandy brown hair. And the other's a cheating bastard."

"You're going to need to refresh my memory," he said, crossing his arms.

"Okay, fella," Lily said, moving in front of Robin. "Baby knows how this game's played," she said to them as she pulled some money from her purse. "How's a $20 help your memory?"

"Thanks," he said, taking the money. "But seriously, it was crazy tonight. You really do need to refresh my memory."

"Then can I have the…" Lily began, then spotted his raised eyebrow. "That's cool. You keep that." She baked away towards Cas, who was hardly containing her laughter.

"So these guys... One of them's an architect," Robin began.

"Ted Mosby, the architect?" The large man asked, grinning.

"That's the one," Robin said, nodding.

"Oh, yeah, he was here," the man said, nodding. He continued to tell them about the interaction, ending with informing them that this had all happened about half an hour ago.

"You know this girl," Robin said, frowning. "Where does she live?"

"I'm not telling you that for less than 20 bucks," he said smugly.

"Well, I'm out of money," Lily said, frowning.

"I'm cashed, too," Cas said.

"I'll take your purse," the bouncer said, nodding at Robin.

"My purse?" Robin asked, looking down at it.

"Yeah, my girl likes clutches," he said, and Cas chuckled.

"Okay, fine," Robin said, digging her things out of the purse.

"You should tell her that looks really good with a chocolate boot," Lily said to the man who nodded seriously.

"Bitch is lucky I brought my small purse. No room for my gun," She said, shoving the purse toward the man. "Here. Now where does the rodeo slut live?"

"The building with the green light," he said, pointing across the street. "Apartment 3-C."

"Oh, my God, Robin, are you going to kick this girl's ass?" Lily asked as they followed Robin across the street.

"Yeah... And steal her purse," Robin said, pulling the building door open. They made their way up to the third floor, quickly finding the girls apartment. "I can't believe he's cheating on me," Robin continues as they approached the door. "You know how many times I could have cheated? Six... no seven. And you know two of them, and they would surprise you."

"3-C, let's do this," Lily said, stopping in front of the door. "You ready?"

"Should I just kick the door in?" Robin asked, setting her things down on the ledge in the hallway.

"Those are really nice heels and you already lost the purse,"Lily said, frowning.

"Let's see if it's unlocked," Cas said, trying the door. "It's unlocked."

"Okay, get in there and kick some spankable ass," Lily said, standing back and gesturing for Robin to go in. Robin stood here for a moment, her shoulders tense, then she seemed to deflate a little.

"Robin?" Cas asked, stepping forward again.

"I'm the problem," she said, her voice sad.

"What?" Lily asked, coming closer too.

"You were right. I don't know how to be a girlfriend," Robin said, nodding to Cas. "I took the nicest guy in the world and I made him a cheater."

"I didn't say you don't know how to be a girlfriend, those were your words," Cas said, holding her hands up in surrender.

"Well, don't stand out here and beat yourself up," Lily said, as though she was giving a pre-game pep talk. "Get in there and beat Ted up. I'll handle the slutty kick boxer." She thought about that for a second. "Actually, I'll take Ted." Cas smiled.

"Let's do this," Robin said, getting into her ready pose again.

"Bring it," Lily said. Cas twisted the doorknob and pushed the door open a little for Robin to go in first, then shut the door behind them as they all hesitated in the entry way. The shower was running, but Lily pointed to the single male leg they could see not he mostly hidden bed. They looked at each other, then nodded.

"What do you think you're…?" Robin began, walking into the bedroom part of the apartment, then coming to a stop, confused. Lily and Cas followed. "Barney?"

"Thank God you're here," Barney said, looking up at them. He was naked except for his boxers and his wrist was tied to the headboard. "Can you help with this? I need nails."

"Okay, I'm totally lost here. Where's Ted?" Robin asked as Cas went around the side of the bed to help him, since neither of the other two had moved to do so. She distractedly fiddled with the scarf around his arm, worried about the sinking feeling she felt in her chest at the sight of him here in some girls apartment. She hated that it still hurt, even though she had a boyfriend now. She got him loose quickly, then went back to the other side of the room.

"Ted? He's at work," Barney said, moving around the room to find his clothing. Cas watched him out of the corner of her eye, trying hard not to.

"How did you get here?" Robin asked.

"Awesome story," Barney began as he pulled his shirt on. "As per usual." He launched into the story of his night, but Cas didn't listen much. It was obvious that he had been pretending to be Ted all night. Maybe it was a good thing that Daniel was probably going to break up with her soon, if she was still this upset by the idea of Barney sleeping around. It's not like it was an unusual occurrence or anything. She just really didn't like to think about it. What was wrong with her? She liked Daniel. He was the first real boyfriend she'd had, ever. She should be making more of an effort to keep the relationship going, but instead she felt resigned to the fact that it was ending. It just seemed like proof to her that there was no point in dating.

"And that led to a couple of hours that I cannot, as a gentleman, divulge to you," Barney said as he finished dressing. Cas glanced back into the room. "We did it right here, and here and here." He pointed around the room. Cas rolled her eyes, stepping further out of the room.

"But why would you use Ted's name?" Robin asked, frowning.

"I've had some recent bad press on the World Wide Web," Barney said, shaking his head. "So I'm taking a T.O. on the whole "using my real name" thing."

"Oh, this is great," Lily said, turning to Robin. "It wasn't Ted. Everything's okay."

"Everything isn't okay," Robin said, frowning. "Look at me. I'm acting crazy and jealous and paranoid."

"This is how people act in relationships," Lily said. Cas frowned. Maybe she was just acting a little paranoid. She knew that the foreign exchange program was challenging, Daniel probably did have an actual test to study for. It stood to reason he would be busy with school.

"And that's why I avoid relationships," Robin said. Cas nodded along subconsciously.

"Well, guess what, I haven't been crazy or jealous or paranoid in months, and I really miss it," Lily said, trying to comfort Robin.

"And thus ended this chapter of, 'Let's pour our hearts out in the bedroom of Barney's one-night stand'," Barney said, pushing both girls by the shoulder towards the door. "Come on, let's go before she gets out of the shower."

"You're such a pig," Robin said, frowning. "You're not even going to say good-bye?"

"I'll have you know I composed a lovely form letter for use in just such an occasion," he said, pulling a piece of paper from his suit pocket and unfolding it. "Just fill out her name and then…" He paused, frowning in confusion. "Something with a "A." A... A... I'll just put 'resident.'," he said, filling out the paper. Cas rolled her eyes, then turned to the door as the shower shut off. She pulled it open, not wanting to be caught in some random chick's apartment. "Go, go, go, go," Barney said, leaving the paper on her bed as they all ran out the door.

"That was ridiculous," Lily said as they hit the street and called a cab.

"I agree," Cas said, then frowned at the look on Robin's face.

"You know what, I think I'm going to walk back," Robin said, turning away from the group as Barney climbed into the cab.

"Are you sure?" Lily asked.

"Want us to come with you?" Cas asked. They weren't really that far from the bar, maybe a couple miles, but the sun had set and while there were a lot of people out at the moment, it wasn't always safe to walk by yourself.

"No, it's fine," Robin said, brushing them off. "I just need to think for a while."

"Alright," Cas said.

"Call us if you need anything," Lily said. Robin nodded, and they climbed into the cab, Barney having already given the driver the bar address.

Cas went straight home instead of joining the others at the bar. She needed to think too.

* * *

Cas woke up the next day determined. She was going to go see Daniel today, and she was going to ask about the canceled dates, and if she came off sounding a little jealous, then so be it. According to Lily, that is how people were supposed to act when in a relationship. If she was wrong about Daniel, she would rather know now than later, and if she was wrong about him cheating, then nothing would change, except her state of mind.

She dressed nicely, taking time to do her hair and makeup. It was almost one by the time she worked up enough courage to go call the cab. She fretted all the way to the school.

The campus was a lot emptier on weekends then she was used to seeing, and she had no trouble getting to the dorms and finding Daniel's building. She had never been to his room before, but she knew which number it was from a bit of unauthorized searching of student records.

She took a deep breath outside his door, then knocked. She waited nearly an entire minute, and two more knocks, before the door was pulled open.

"Hey," a guy said, nodding to her as he leaned against the door. He was shirtless, in his boxers, and obviously had just woken up, judging from the state of his very messy brown hair.

"Hi," she said dryly. "I'm looking for Daniel. Is he here?" She asked, assuming that this was his roommate. She had never met him, but she had heard a bit about him. She couldn't remember his name though.

"I'm way more fun than Daniel," he said, winking. She rolled her eyes.

"I'm a school counselor," she said, drawing herself up to her full height, which was, sad to say, not much. The guy straightened up though.

"Dan's in the library," he said, then grinned. "I'm not opposed to a little counseling."

"I'm way too much for you to handle," Cas said, then turned to walk back down the hall.

The library. That was good. That meant he really was studying.

The library was on the other side of campus. Three street crossings, multiple passed buildings, and an almost twenty minute walk later, she found herself walking up and down the isles, looking from side to side to see if he was in one of the solitary study areas at the end of each isle. She checked both floors with no results. On her way out, she spotted a few group study areas, and grinned when she spotted him at one of the tables. His head was bent over a book but he seemed to be talking to the person beside him, a girl with short brown hair.

"Hey," she said softly as she approached the table. Both of the end occupants looked up at her, both frowning. "Could I talk to you outside for a minute?" She asked Daniel, ignoring the piercing green eyes of the girl next to him. He sighed and stood, then followed her out of the library around the side of the building.

"I thought I said I was busy studying this weekend," he said, frowning at her. She looked at her feet, not wanting to see his expression.

"No, you did," she said. "I was just… getting some things from my office so I thought I'd stop by and see if you wanted to get lunch?"

He sighed, relaxing out of his upset stance.

"I'd honestly love to," he said, and she looked up, surprised. "But I've got this big test on Monday." Her heart sank as she read the lie on him. "I think I'll be free Monday night though. We could get dinner." She nodded along, internally debating whether to say something. She had to know though.

"You're lying," she said in a small voice as he turned to walk back inside. He turned back, frowning.

"No, I really think I'll have time for dinner," he said.

"Not that," she said impatiently, looking up at him with narrowed eyes. "About the test and the studying." He was silent for a moment. "Look, if something is going on, I think I should know."

"Nothings going on," he said, stepping forward to rest a hand on her shoulder. She took a step back, seeing another lie.

"Are you seeing someone else?" She asked, crossing her arms over her stomach as her chest began to ache.

"No no, of course not," he said, stepping forward again. She took another step back.

"You're lying," she repeated. "Is that why you've been canceling our dates? You're cheating on me?"

"I'm not cheating on you," he said, and she frowned, not seeing the lie in that. "Look," he said, running a hand through his hair. "We've both been really busy the last couple months, you with work and me with my classes. And I've met a lot of great people here."

"Where are you going with this?" Cas asked when he trailed off.

"I've just been… seeing someone," he said, contradicting his previous statement. She took another step back and she could feel her eyes watering a little. "It's not cheating, it was just hanging out, nothing happened I swear."

"You just said you are seeing someone else," she said, and was embarrassed to find that her voice cracked a little. "That's cheating."

"Not any more than you being in love with Barney is cheating," he said angrily, shoving his hands into his pockets. She gaped at him for a moment, trying to think of something to say, but her mind was blank. "It's obvious," he continued when she didn't say anything. "The way he watches you when you hang out, and the way you talk to him. You both love each other."

"He doesn't… I don't… We are just friends," she said, trying to get her feet back under her at that curve ball.

"I can see it and I've only hung out with all of you a few times," he said, rolling his eyes, then he sighed. "Look, this isn't working out anyway. I'm going back to London in a few months and this wouldn't last then anyway."

"So it's over?" She asked, not to clarify, but more so for time to get her thoughts in order. She was upset, of course. Her first relationship had crashed and burned. It was doing so right now. But she also, distantly, felt a little relieved at it's end. She wouldn't have to worry and overthink things anymore, or get jealous or constantly feel like she was being annoying by calling or texting. And part of her felt bad that she was relieved. But the biggest part of her wanted to beg him to make it work out of fear of being alone again. While she had never liked dating, it was so nice to know that she was wanted by someone. Now that was gone again.

"Cas," he said, making her look up at him. His hand rested against her cheek, his thumb wiping over her cheek bone. Her tears had leaked over. She frowned at herself and used her coat sleeve to wipe them away. He surprised her by pulling her into a hug.

She was tense for a moment, but he was familiar and comforting, and she couldn't help but relax against his chest. He released her after a moment.

"Sorry," she muttered, wiping her cheeks again to make sure the tears were gone.

"No, I'm sorry," he said, his hands resting on her shoulders as he stepped back from her. "I knew it wasn't working out and I didn't do anything about it."

"It's my fault," she said, shaking her head. "I thought I was over Barney. I'm sorry I didn't tell you about it earlier."

"Everyone has a past," he said, gripping her shoulder in comfort. "If I hadn't been so stressed about classes this would have come up a lot sooner. I'm sorry I let it drag on so long. You are a great person, and Barney is a lucky guy."

She chuckled, shaking her head and wiping her eyes again.

"We can still be friends though, right?" He asked. She nodded.

"Stop by and see me sometime before you go back to London okay?" She said, her voice coming out as a whisper.

"I will," he said, smiling a little now. "I'm sorry."

And with that he was gone, disappearing back into the library before she could think of anything else to say.

She wandered back through the campus to her office, which was bound to be empty since it was a Sunday. As she walked, she played over what had just happened again and again. She supposed it was good, as far as breakups went, not that she had much to base that off of, besides movies. He hadn't yelled, or been angry.

She unlocked the office building and sequestered herself inside her favorite counseling room, curling up on the couch and letting herself cry, now that she was in private.

* * *

Cas spent the next three weeks throwing herself into her work, and avoiding the group. It wasn't hard to do, Ted and Robin spent a lot of time together in their apartment, Marshall spent his free time studying law, and Barney was always off hooking up with some chick or another. Lily was the only one hard to avoid, since she was still out of work.

She bought the work excuse for only so long before barging into Cas's apartment just before lunch one Saturday.

"Cas!" She said, swinging the door open so hard it hit the wall. Cas sighed, not looking up from the paperwork she had been reading over at the table.

She hadn't changed out of her pajamas yet, not that she ever really did on weekends. A pint of ice cream was sitting, half melted, on the table next to her current file, and her hair was up in a very untidy bun.

"Hello Lily," Cas said with a sigh.

"Wow you look terrible," Lily said, coming to sit across the table from her.

"Thanks," Cas said, not even bothering to sound sarcastic. She could see Lily frowning out of the corner of her eye.

"Wait a minute," she said after a moment of silence. "Over working, bags under the eyes, ice cream for lunch, no shower and pajamas. You and Daniel broke up didn't you."

"No, no," Cas began, then her shoulders slumped at Lily's piercing look. "Okay, yes. We did."

"When? What happened? Tell me everything," she said, scooting her chair around the table closer to Cas.

"Three weeks ago," Cas said. "He was… seeing someone else."

"Oh, Honey, I'm so sorry," Lily said, hugging Cas around the shoulder. "Why didn't you tell us sooner? We could have gone shopping or something other than moping around."

"You can't tell anyone," Cas said, frowning at her as she closed the file she had been working on.

"Why not?" Lily asked, tilting her head to one side as Cas stood.

"Well, it's just… Barney said something like a month before we broke up, and he was right," Cas said, shrugging, trying to sound nonchalant. "I don't want him to know he was right or he'll do that thing where he acts super smug and shoves it in my face."

"I understand," Lily said, then looked at her knowingly. "And it doesn't help that you are still in love with Barney."

"No it doesn't," Cas said, not bothering to deny it. Lily grinned triumphantly.

"I knew it," she said. "Perfect."

"Perfect?" Cas asked, raising a brow.

"You have to talk to him," Lily said. "Tell him you like him."

"No," Cas said, shaking her head. "You know what he's like. He doesn't do relationships."

"He would with you I think," Lily said. "He's been more comfortable around you than the rest of us since we all met you know."

"Yeah well, that's not really… that's not accurate," Cas said, frowning. Lily, sensing more to the story, pulled Cas over to her couch and tugged her down, both of them plopping down at the same time. There was a loud cracking sound, and then suddenly the bottom of the couch dropped down about a foot.

"What just happened?" Lily asked, looking stunned as Cas chuckled.

"We broke my couch," she said, struggling to pull herself off the couch, then turning to help Lily up. "It's old, I've had it for nine years, it was bound to happen, don't worry about it." They both walked back to the table, Lily apologizing multiple times.

"Really makes me want to go on a diet now," Lily said, chuckling.

"Speak for yourself, I've been on a run every morning this week," Cas said, shaking her head.

"Yeah yeah, show off," Lily grumbled, then leaned forward. "Back to the topic?"

"Okay, well a while ago, before last summer, we were kind of in this thing…" And Cas explained everything, from him spending time in her apartment, to the friends with benefit's relationship, to the ending of it at the prom.

"Wow," Lily said when she had finished. "I can't believe I didn't know that sooner."

"Well you aren't the most observant person," Cas said, smiling a little for the first time that day."

"Okay, you definitely have to tell him now," Lily said, ignoring Cas's comment.

"Lily, didn't you hear anything I just said?" Cas asked, frowning at her. "He doesn't do relationships."

"I think he might if it was you," Lily said, but Cas was shaking her head already.

"I'm not any good at being in a relationship anyway. I don't know how and it will end badly," she said. "And if it doesn't work out… Well I'd rather be friends with him than lose him altogether."

"Just think about it okay?" Lily said, patting her knee. "I think you would be a lot happier if you told him how you feel."

"I'll think about it, Lily," Cas said with a sigh, knowing there was no way she would ever bring it up to him. "Did you come by for a reason?"

"Yes, actually," Lily said, getting to her feet. "Ted and Robin are coming by my place today to have a little 'housewarming' party. Want to come?"

"Your apartment is the size of a cupboard Lily," Cas said, shaking her head. "I don't think four people could fit in there. Besides, I kind of just want to be alone for a while. I'll come by the bar later tonight though, if you want." She added the last part quickly, seeing Lily's determined face, which usually led to an unpleasant social experience for Cas.

"Okay, okay," Lily said, heading to the door. "I'll see you tonight then."

"Bye Lily," Cas said, slumping back into her couch with a sigh.

* * *

Cas forced herself to get dressed that evening instead of calling Lily to say she couldn't make it to the bar. She knew that Lily would just force her out somewhere else later if Cas ditched tonight. She brushed out her hair into a more socially acceptable bun, but didn't bother with makeup before making her way to the bar. She didn't order a drink, not really in the mood for alcohol. Lily wasn't there yet, but Ted, Robin, and Barney were. She hesitated, and almost left, but Robin saw her and waved her over. Cas took the only open seat, next to Barney.

"Hey guys," she said quietly. Robin smiled at her, but the guys were apparently in the middle of a conversation.

"Okay, we have to get Lily out of that apartment," Ted was saying. "Her roommate is a raccoon."

"I'd offer her my place, but I've got dogs and she's allergic," Robin said, returning to the conversation.

"Dogs?" Ted said with a snort. "I live with her ex-boyfriend. I think she's a little more allergic to that."

"My couch is broken and I haven't had time to replace it yet, so my place is out," Cas said, trying to make her voice peppy.

"Too much action on there?" Barney said suggestively, raising his brows and making a spanking motion. Cas rolled her eyes and gave a flat smile.

"What about your place, Barney?" Robin said, rolling her eyes at his actions. "I know it's shrouded in mystery, but it's gotta have a couch."

"The Fortress of Barnitude? No way," He said, shaking his head. Cas frowned. Hadn't any of the others been to Barney's place before? He had given her a spare key months and months ago, and she had spent quite a few nights at his place when they had been sleeping together. She hadn't realized that none of the rest of their group had ever been there.

"Come on," Robin said imploringly. "She's desperate."

"Hmm, normally a prerequisite for the women I bring home, but… pass," Barney said. They didn't continue the conversation as Marshall approached the table.

"One of you guys is very, very lucky because I have… A…" he pulled two concert tickets from his pocket. "Boom! An extra ticket to the Alanis Morissette concert. Who's in?"

"Absolutely not," Robin said, shaking her head.

"No," Ted said, when Marshall looked at him. Barney just shook his head.

"No thanks," Cas mumbled when he looked at her. He sighed.

"Damn! I got these tickets like months ago for me and Lily and now I can't find anyone to go with me," he said, frowning. "This is what I miss about being in a couple. I always had someone to go to concerts with, or farmer's market, or brunch. God, I miss brunch!"

"Well, I guess you could - well, you could try going to brunch alone," Ted suggested. Cas just looked into her lap while they all talked.

"Oh, you don't think I've tried?" Marshal asked, frowning. "The host at the Popover pantry gave me such a pathetic look."

"Oh, the Popover Pantry!" Robin said, grinning. "That place is great. Can we go get brunch tomorrow?" She asked, leaning into Ted.

"Of course, sweetie," Ted said , smiling down at her.

"Can I go with you guys?" Marshall asked.

"Really? For brunch?" Ted asked in a voice that obviously said that would be weird.

"God, I hate being single!" Marshall said, standing up and going to the bar.

"Um, I'm gonna go," Cas said quietly, getting to her feet as Ted and Robin talked about brunch. No one acknowledged her words, so she turned to leave.

"Cas," someone called as she reached the top of the stairs outside. She turned around. "Are you okay?" Barney asked. She had to smile at that. His tone and face were anxious, just like they had been when he used to ask her this at least once a week the first three or four months they had known each other.

"I'm fine," she said, her usual response. Usually he went back inside at that, but today he climbed the stairs till he was next to her.

"You don't look fine," he said, glancing her over. She was wearing a lot of layers, as it was cold out, but she didn't think she looked anything out of the ordinary. "You look… tired."

"Oh," she said, realizing that the bags under her eyes would be remarkable similar to the ones she used to have all the time when she was stressed from work and when Barney had been worried that she was going to jump off the Empire State Building. "No, I'm fine, really. Work has just been busy."

"Okay," he said, then frowned. He turned to go back into the bar without saying anything though, so she just shrugged and went home.

It was nice to know he was still worried about her. She honestly hadn't thought he cared anymore. Maybe Lily was right and she should talk to him.

* * *

Cas spent the next two weeks thinking things over and avoiding Lily, not that the girl called often. Twice a week at most, and Cas made excuses to not go out. She knew that Lily would want to talk about Barney, and Cas wanted to make a decision on her own, without Lily's influence.

Finally, late on Friday night after multiple movies and another pint of ice cream, Cas decided to tell him. If it went well, she would be ecstatic. If it didn't go well… well, it would be awkward for a while, but she was sure they would still be friends. Barney wasn't the type to act awkward for too long, and she really wanted to know what would happen if she told him she liked him.

So maybe it was just the loneliness driving her, but come Saturday morning, she was standing outside his apartment door. She wasn't sure he would be home, but she would wait for him if he wasn't. After all, he used to show up unannounced at her apartment and sit and watch TV.

She knocked on the door, but there was no answer, so she let herself in with his spare key, dropping her purse by the door.

The living room had a lot more color in it then the last time she had been there. There were throw pillows on the couch, a rug on the floor, and a couple house plants spaced around the large room. She made her way back to his bedroom, thinking maybe he was just still asleep, it was quite early.

"Barney?" She called, knocking softly on the door. There was no answer, so she pushed it open, only to immediately wish she hadn't come over.

She should have realized that he would have gone out last night and picked up some girl. Both of them were faced away from the door, the girl with her arm thrown over Barney. Cas backed out of the room carefully, not making any noise, and she was almost all the way out when she recognized the girls hair. She tip toed around the bed against her better judgment, and had to stifle a gasp.

The girl was Lily. What the hell was going on? Cas practically ran from the room, and she winced as the door shut a little loudly behind her, but she didn't stop running. She grabbed her purse and shut the front door, a little quieter than the other door, and let the building, heart pounding in her chest.

She made it home before she let herself cry again.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter Sixteen

Cas spent the next week throwing herself into her work. She stayed later than anyone else, picked up extra office hours, and when she finally went home, it was with a case load of files to read over. She began locking the deadbolt on her apartment door when she was inside, something she had never done before because it needed a different key to unlock than the doorknob did, but it meant that the most contact she had to have was people knocking on her door until they got tired of her ignoring them.

She thought a lot about what she had witnessed the week before. She had noticed that Lily could be quite vindictive at times, but usually that was only directed as a form of payback to someone, and Cas couldn't recall doing anything terrible to her. But Lily had also been complaining about missing Marshall, and with enough alcohol, Cas supposed that hooking up with Barney was something that could have happened.

She tried to be mad at Barney as well as Lily, but Lily knew everything. Cas had confided in her, and Lily had done that anyway. At least Barney had no idea of Cas's feelings. That made it a little easier for her to handle.

Finally, after double checking through the bar window to make sure that neither Lily nor Barney were in the bar, she went down for drinks on Friday evening. She ordered a beer and slid into the empty seat next to Marshall with a generic greeting.

"Hey Cas!" Robin said, grinning. "It feels like we haven't seen you in weeks. What's new?"

"Oh, nothing much," Cas said, giving a shrug. "It's just been a bit hectic at work. And I had a cold last week." Not technically a lie, she had been a bit sick, though usually that wouldn't have kept her at home if she wanted to go out.

"You do look a bit pale," Ted commented, sipping his beer.

"That's just my normal skin tone, thanks," Cas said sarcastically, then chuckled. "So any plans for the night?"

"Yeah, actually," Ted said.

"We just found out that Lily's been working at Big Wave Luau, that restaurant that makes all the employees wear those ridiculous Hawaiian outfits. We were gonna go over and get a picture."

"Want to come with?" Ted asked, laughing with Marshall. Robin just shook her head.

"Oh, no thanks," Cas said, trying to keep the anger from her voice. "I don't really feel like going out." She evidently had failed in keeping her voice even, since the all stared at her in confusion.

"Did something happen?" Robin asked, and they all leaned in, eager for more gossip.

"No, nothing happened," Cas tried to say, but they didn't give up. "I just… don't really want to talk to Lily right now."

"What did she do?" Robin asked, frowning.

"It must have been big. I don't think I've ever seen you angry before," Ted commented, leaning further over the table.

"It was nothing," Cas said, sitting back against the booth. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Okay, okay," Marshall said, holding his hands up. "No need to glare at us like that." Cas forced her face to relax. She hadn't realized she was glaring.

"Well if that's all you guys are doing tonight, I'm just gonna head home," Cas said, finishing off her beer. "I have some work to catch up on this weekend.

"Sure you do," Robin commented. Cas just shrugged and climbed out of the seat.

* * *

It wasn't more than two hours later when her phone started ringing. She didn't answer it, recognizing the number as Lily's. The others must have mentioned she was upset, but Cas really wasn't in the mood to hear Lily's explanations right then.

She sunk onto her couch, tossing her phone onto the floor. Normally, this would have been fine since she liked to keep her apartment clean, but currently there were papers covering every table and counter surface, shoes and clothes littered the floor, and she hadn't washed any dishes for weeks, meaning they had piled up in the sink and around the living room, like the top of the TV.

The couch was still broken, Cas didn't see the point in replacing it since no one really sat on it. She sunk into it, the material pulling into a sort of hammock, which she curled up in. She toed off her shoes, letting them fall wherever, and shed most of the coat layers, then turned her body into the back of the couch, sighing as her phone rang again and again. She should have silenced it before throwing it, but now she didn't want to get up to find it.

She'd had 'friends' in the past who had done some really mean things to her, that was part of life. She could compare this to the one time in high school when she had told her supposed best friend at the time that she had a crush on a boy, and then watching as her friend purposely humiliated her in front of him, then went on to make out with him in the hall ways, only this was ten times worse. Mostly because Cas hadn't really had much in common with her 'best friend' in high school and she had, until recently, really liked Lily, but also because she had let herself care a lot more about Barney than she should have. She should have squashed these stupid feelings when she first noticed them happening. She didn't get close to people, ever. It just wasn't something she did, because people lied. All of them lied.

But she had thought these people were different. They lied, sure, but not about anything really important. She had let herself get attached, and she had gotten hurt because of it. She should have expected that. This was why it was so much easier for her to just not have any close friends. Feelings didn't get hurt if there was no one able to hurt them.

She heard a key in the door, then groaned as she realized she had forgotten to lock the bolt on her way into the apartment.

"Look, Lily, I really don't want to talk to you right now so can you please just leave me alone?" Cas asked, her voice muffled by her arms, both of which were covering her head as she curled into the couch. It was quiet for a moment, and Cas turned her head towards the door, wondering if Lily had actually followed her directions, only to spot Barney, looking around the apartment in slight horror.

Cas groaned again, turning back into the couch.

"Of course you're here," she said in a half angry, half resigned voice. "Go away, please."

"Cas this place is a mess," Barney said from the door. She sighed.

"Really now? I hadn't noticed at all," she said into the couch, squeezing her eyes shut as she willed him to just go away. "Why are you here?"

"You weren't answering your phone," he said, and she heard him kicking off his shoes by the doorway. She sighed, realizing he wasn't going to be leaving, and sat up as much as she could on the broken couch, hugging her legs to her chest.

"I thought it was Lily calling again," Cas said as was of explanation. "You know, I'm not heading to jump of a bridge every time I don't answer my phone. You don't have to check up on me."

"Why is it so messy in here?" He asked, ignoring her comment. She sighed and stood, grabbing a pair of slacks from the floor as she went and tossing it into the hamper by her wardrobe.

"I haven't felt much like cleaning recently," she said, shrugging as she gathered the rest of the clothing from the floor, tucking her phone into her pocket as she went. Next she started gathering the dishes to put int he sink.

"What's wrong, Cas," Barney asked seriously as she moved around the apartment. He had sat in one of her dining chairs, careful not to disturb the papers on the table.

She kept her back to him, moving the dishes around as she spoke. "Daniel and I broke up," she said, though that was no longer the biggest thing upsetting her at the moment. "A month ago. I haven't felt much like cleaning since then."

"A month ago?" He asked, and she heard the chair scrape as he stood. "Oh, is that why you've been avoiding all of us for a few weeks? Why didn't you say anything?"

"Because you were right, he was seeing someone else, and I wasn't really in the mood to hear the 'I-told-you-so's," she said bitterly scrubbing at one of her plates as she ran it under the water.

Hands reached around her to tug the plate out of her grip and turn the water off, and she kept her gaze down as he turned her around to face him.

"Do you really think I would have done that?" He asked, a strange tone in his voice that made her look up, frowning. Her face was carefully blank, and she couldn't read the emotions behind it.

"Well… yeah," she said with a small voice. He frowned, then stepped away from her, running a hand through his hair. "Sorry?" She added, not sure what was going on. He turned back and frowned again.

"I didn't realize… look, Cas," he said, his voice serious still. "I'm an asshole to everyone most of the time but, if there is something seriously wrong, I'm not going to make fun of you about it. You shouldn't have to worry about telling me things. Especially you."

"Especially me?" She repeated, not sure what he meant by that. Her heart was beating quickly now, as part of her wanted to tell him how she felt.

"You're my best friend Cas," he said, voice completely serious as she frowned at him.

"Ted's your best friend," she said after a moment of thought. "I'm just some girl you stopped from jumping off a building."

"No, you are a lot more than that," he said. "I have never been anything less than awesome around anyone until I met you."

"I suppose that's a high commendation coming from you," she said, giving a shaky laugh in an attempt to lighten the conversation. He smiled.

"The highest," he said, nodding. The moment for her to come clean had passed, and her heart was beating almost normally by the time he pulled her into a hug. "I'm sorry your boyfriend cheated on you." She shrugged in his arms. "But now we can go out to clubs. I'll be your wingman."

She rolled her eyes as he released her and she turned back to the dishes.

"No thanks," she said. "I don't really like clubs that much. We can start with the bar."

"Great, lets go," he said, adopting his usual upbeat attitude.

"Not tonight. Maybe tomorrow," she said. "I'm just gonna stay in and clean."

"Want some company?" He asked, looking over the place.

"No thanks," she said, chuckling. "I think you would combust if you tried to clean something. Go to the bar. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Tomorrow then," he said, slipping his shoes on, then leaving the apartment.

Cas sighed, dropping her smile as she washed the dishes.

Her two main points of overthinking the last few weeks had been the revolving images of Barney laughing if she told him how she felt, and him becoming really awkward around her to the point that she wouldn't enjoy hanging out with the group anymore. But maybe he wouldn't laugh. Maybe he would even return her feelings, to an extent. He had said she was his best friend because, in less words, he could be himself around her.

She began straightening up the many files and papers spread over the apartment as she thought. Maybe she should tell him after all. She had been so sure everything would work out last week, though she couldn't remember her exact reasoning.

* * *

She spent the whole next morning catching up on all the laundry she had left undone and restocking her fridge with groceries but she was out of things to do well before she was supposed to be at the bar, so she took the time to actually do her hair and put on makeup. By the time eight o'clock rolled around she couldn't sit still, so she got to the bar before everyone else. As she sipped a beer alone in their usual booth, she tried to decide what she should do if Lily came with them. A huge part of her was still angry, but a small part of her mind said it would be less confrontational to just ignore the whole situation and not bring it up. She would never trust Lily again with anything important, and she didn't want to start a big fight, but she was still hurting.

"Hey look who's finally joining us at the bar," Ted said, sliding into the booth across from Cas. Robin and Marshall were just a few steps behind him.

"I was here last night too Ted," Cas said, rolling her eyes, but she smiled. She hadn't realized how much she had missed them all in the last couple weeks.

"For like ten minutes," Robin said, rolling her eyes. Barney came over then, setting a pitcher of beer and some glasses in the middle of the table.

"I've never needed the beer more than I do right now," Marshall said, pouring himself a cup. He did look stressed.

"I thought you said your semester was gonna be a piece of cake," Ted said, accepting a cup of beer. "I remember because you were eating a piece of cake at the time and you said, 'dude, my semester is gonna be this'."

"Yeah, well, it was supposed to be, but my professor's like the toughest grader I've ever seen," Marshall said. "She had like a bad divorce this summer and now she's taking it out on us. To tell you the truth, I think she just needs to get laid."

"Really?" Barney chimed in, grinning. "Laid, you say?" Cas rolled her eyes. No, this was why she couldn't say anything to him. He liked being able to sleep with anyone he wanted. And some of his stories were even funny. How could she take that away? Either he would say no and she would likely ruin the friendship, or he would return her feelings, though she doubted that, and he would end up changing into someone else, only to likely find that he was miserable a few months down the road. She couldn't say anything.

"You wouldn't be into her," Marshall said, shrugging. "She's, like, in her late 40s."

"She hot?" Barney asked. Cas forced herself to follow the conversation and not look down into her lap while they talked.

Starting today she was going to stop caring about her feelings. She had made her decision not to say anything, and she would follow it, which meant that she had to ignore her feelings. She would, instead, focus on just being his best friend. That was enough for now.

"Yeah, I guess she's kind of hot, yeah," Marshall said, shrugging.

"And she's looking for some action," Barney said in a contemplative voice. "Sounds to me like she could be a cougar."

"A what?" Robin asked, frowning.

"A cougar," Barney said. "An older woman, usually in her 40s or 50s, single and on the prowl for a younger man."

"What's a woman in her 60s or 70s?" Ted asked jokingly. "A turtle?"

"Marshall, I've thought it over and I accept your challenge," Barney said, ignoring Ted.

"I didn't challenge you to have sex with-" Marshall protested, but Barney ignored him.

"Tomorrow, the cougar hunt begins," Barney said, and everyone at the table shook their heads.

"So, I quit my job," Lily said, approaching the table angrily. Cas did look into her lap now. She was definitely still angry. "I just couldn't take it anymore. Approximately 50 times a day, some guy asks me for a lei…" Cas snorted, really wanted to say something biting.

"Classic," Marshall said, nodding.

"Ted, didn't you tell me they need a new assistant in your office?" Robin asked. Cas slid out of the booth, finishing off her beer. She set it on the table, then slid from the booth as Ted spoke about their old receptionist. No one noticed her leaving, though her phone did ring fifteen minutes later.

"Hey," she said, seeing Robin's name flashing across the screen.

"Hey, where are you? We thought you were in the bathroom but you've disappeared," Robin said.

"I'm at home," she said. "I'm not really feeling well. I think my cold from last week is still sticking around."

"Oh okay, well, feel better soon," she said. Cas smiled.

"Thanks, I'll try," she said, then hung up. She sighed and laid back on her bed, still fully clothed. She hated lying. A lot. But she had been doing it more than ever recently. That needed to stop. It made her feel almost sick to lie to her friends.

Next time she saw Lily, she would confront her about sleeping with Barney. After that, she would work on finding someone else to hook up with, which was probably all she needed to do to get her mind off Barney..

With that decision made, she drifted off to sleep, not bothering to get up and change clothes.

* * *

She didn't see any of the group until the next weekend, when Robin had called her to tel her about Ted's building design being accepted. She couldn't very well skip that celebration, it was a huge deal and Ted was her friend, so she went even though she knew Lily would be there. She even dressed nicely and did her hair.

When she arrived at the bar, there was a crowd of people around the bar and Robin was just finishing a toast to Ted.

"To Ted! The youngest person to ever design a building over 70 stories... Probably!" She said, grinning.

"Probably!" The rest of the group chanted. Cas laughed and made her way up to the group at the bar.

"Congrats, Ted," Lily said, smiling.

"Hey, thanks for telling me to stand up to Druthers and pitch my idea," Ted said. "Seriously, none of this would have happened if it weren't for you."

"Oh. You know what, Ted?" Lily said. "That was very nice. You have earned these screws back. Don't sit in your desk chair until you've put them back in." Cas couldn't help but chuckle at that, even though she was mad at Lily.

"Hey, I'm project manager now, so, if you want your old job back…"

"No, thanks. I think I figured out what I want to be when I grow up," Lily said, shrugging. "I miss being a kindergarten teacher. I have an interview on Monday for an elementary school across town.

"That's great Lily!" Robin said, grinning.

"Hey Cas!" Ted called, spotting her over the heads of the others.

"Hey Ted! Congratulations," Cas said, sliding up to the front of the bar.

"Thanks," Ted said, jumping off the bar as the others began making their way to their normal booth.

"Hey, um, Lily?" Cas began, making the red head turn back to her. Lily was looking upset, already knowing that Cas had been mad at her from the others. "Could I talk to you for a sec? Outside?"

"Uh, sure," Lily said, setting her drink down at the booth then following Cas outside to the street. They walked a little ways away from the bar entrance to be out of the way of people going in or out.

"Look, I know I've been avoiding you for the last two weeks-" Cas started.

"I'm really sorry for whatever I did to make you mad-" Lily began at the same time. Both of them stopped, and Cas sighed.

"I know you slept with Barney," Cas said, then held up a hand to stall Lily's protests. "I saw you okay? I went over to his apartment that morning because I was finally going to tell him about… well you know. And I went to wake him up because I thought maybe he was just sleeping in and I saw you both in bed, cuddling. But it's fine," she said, talking over Lily's further protests. "I've decided I'm not going to tell him. I'm just going to get over everything. I'm still mad at you, but I thought you should know why."

"Are you done?" Lily asked, and to Cas's surprise she was grinning.

"Yeah," she said, nodding.

"Okay," Lily said. "I didn't sleep with Barney," she said, and Cas frowned, not seeing a lie in her words. "I was staying with him for a few days because a wall in my apartment was broken and he came up with the idea to help him get girls out of the house in the morning by pretending to be his wife. I never would have done it but I was desperate for somewhere to stay. So we redecorated his place and it worked really well for about two weeks, but then one Friday we just ended up staying in and watching TV in his room and we both fell asleep. Nothing happened, I swear, we were just sleeping. And he kicked me out right after that anyway."

They were both silent for a moment, then Cas burst out laughing, Lily joining in a moment later.

"I can't believe I didn't talk to you about it sooner," Cas said. "I should have known you wouldn't do something like that. I'm so sorry I overreacted."

"Yeah geez, I have standards," Lily said, laughing.

"He's not that bad of a guy you know," Cas said, calming down a little. Lily smiled at her.

"You would say that," she said, shaking her head. "But he sleeps with _everybody_."

"I know," Cas said, sighing.

"Are you sure you aren't going to tell him?" Lily asked, patting Cas's shoulder.

"Yeah, I'm sure," Cas said. "Maybe eventually I'll explain my reasoning to you but right now I think we should get back inside."

"Sure," Lily said, wrapping an arm around Cas's shoulders.

"You know I feel short when you do that," Cas said, shrugging the arm off. Lily laughed.

"You are short," she said. "You're like two inches shorter than me."

"That's what heels are for," Cas replied, chuckling.

"Hear hear," Lily said, pulling the door open for them.

"Are mom and dad done fighting now?" Robin asked as they sat down at the table with the others.

"Yep," Cas said happily, stealing Robin's beer glass.

"What were you two fighting about anyway?" Barney asked, looking between them. Lily and Cas looked at each other for a moment, then they both laughed.

"Nothing," Lily said. "Just a misunderstanding."

"Uh huh," he said, frowning. He was quickly distracted by Marshall complaining about his test results from the day before. Cas, Ted, Robin, and Lily headed home for the night when Barney started explaining, in detail, just how he was going to get Marshall a better grade.

* * *

Cas was woken up the next morning by her phone ringing. She had already been half awake, thanks to a really annoying taxi who had decided to sit outside her building and honk it's horn for nearly ten minutes.

"Hello?" She asked, not recognizing the number.

"Good morning," a very peppy voice said. "Am I speaking to a Ms. Cas Reynolds?"

"You are," Cas said, getting out of bed to find some clothes. Even though it was barely seven thirty in the morning, she wasn't going to be able to fall asleep again.

"Hi. My name's Mary, I work at St. Columbia's Medical Center and you are listed as an emergency contact for Mr. Barney Stinson."

"Oh my god," Cas said, freezing as she pulled on her jeans. "Is he okay? What happened?"

"Oh he's fine," the woman said. "He has possibly broken his left hip, they are taking him in for x-rays shortly but we are required by law to call the emergency contact numbers whenever a patient is admitted."

"Um, okay, thanks," Cas said, then hung up the phone on the overly friendly woman. She pulled on her jeans and a hoodie, not bothering to find a t-shirt to go underneath it, and grabbed her things on her way out.

She didn't bother trying to find a cab this early in the morning, all the business people would be trying to get one so it would be faster to walk the almost mile to the hospital. She ended up jogging most of the way, arriving just before eight, which was lucky since the receptionist told her visiting hours didn't start till eight.

Cas anxiously waited the ten remaining minutes, then hurried through the halls to the room number the receptionist had finally given her. She opened the door and walked in, right part an older woman who was standing near the bed, smoking a cigarette.

"Barney, are you okay? What happened?" She asked, walking around the bed to stand near his head.

"Cas?" He asked, obviously confused. "How did you know I was here?"

"You're the idiot who put my number down as an emergency contact," Cas said, rolling her eyes. "The nurse said you broke your hip?"

"More like 'temporarily dislocated' it," Barney said, protesting as the woman beside him rolled her eyes. Cas looked her over with a frown. "This is Ms. Lewis," Barney said, making introductions. Cas frowned deeper. She would have disliked the woman even if she hadn't been sleeping with Barney because she was smoking in a hospital and looked like she had something disgusting smelling shoved under her nose.

"Do you mind?" Cas asked, frowning. "This is a hospital."

"I don't mind, actually," the woman said imperiously, taking another puff of her cigarette.

"Great, I didn't think you would," Cas said, reaching an arm across the bed to pluck the cigarette out of the woman fingers. She proceeded to drop the cigarette into a Styrofoam cup of water that had been placed on a nearby counter top. The woman glared at her for a moment. "The nicotine, tar, and carbon monoxide in cigarettes has been scientifically proven to increase chances of lung disease, heart disease, and several types of cancer. It causes the accumulation of atherosclerosis in the arteries, causes coronary heart disease, which can lead to high blood pressure, obesity, diabetes, and in severe cases, causes heart attacks. Smoking, even second-hand smoke, can have a very negative affect on the mental capacity of developing babies, which there are bound to be a few here, since this is, after all, a hospital. Cigarette smoke contains over 4,000 chemicals, including 43 known cancer-causing compounds." She said all of this very quickly in one breath, pausing only to take in another lungful of smoky air. "If you are going to do something that will negatively affect your health and life, then by all means, be my guest, but do it away from those who are trying to have a pleasant day. That is called common courtesy. Now, are you alright?" She asked, turning back to Barney, who had his mouth hanging open. It took him a second to grasp the change in conversation.

"Uh, yeah. Just great," he said.

"Barney! Oh, my god!" Robin said as the others arrived.

"What happened?" Ted asked. Cas took a step back so the others could stand closer.

"He broke his hip," the woman said, frowning slightly.

"That's not true," Barney said. "It's just temporarily dislocated. Seriously, I'm fine."

"No, he's not fine," she said to the others.

"Professor Lewis, hi," Marshall said, stuffing his hands in his pockets and looking guilty.

"Mr. Eriksen. Hello," she said. "I graded your paper last night. I was pleasantly surprised."

"Yeah, she was," Barney said, though the woman was looking at Cas as she spoke rather than Barney.

"B plus," she said, then turned and left the room. Cas watched her go, frowning.

"B-plus?!" Barney called after her incredulously. "Marshall, after I've gone through my eight weeks of physical therapy, I am going to get you that "A"!"

"Let her go. She belongs out there in the wild," Marshall said dramatically. Cas shook her head. "You should feel proud. You fought the cougar and lived."

"It was an amazing safari," Barney said. "I can't wait to show you guys the slides!" He pulled his phone from his pocket as they all groaned.


End file.
